Everything Changes
by beccalucy
Summary: Follow the story as Jax tries to find the balance between his family and his club as well as trying to get over the disappearance of Nicole. Clay struggles to stay afloat as greed over takes him and Gemma fights to keep her rein as Queen as she battles with past demons. Can Samco survive, can Tara and her family. Continuation of Home Sweet Home and Fighting Back.
1. Chapter 1

Hey, I'm back. So I know it's been like forever since I stopped writing this story and finally pulled it. But I promise you the hiatus was well spent. It took some time, and some late nights re-reading the previous installments of this series and watching the whole 4 series of SOA (Which wasn't exactly painful) before I finally broke through my writers block. Yay!

Although I have pretty much finished writing this story (Some bits may seem familiar as I've kept some original parts in this story.) I've left it till now to post because I didn't want to leave you all hanging again if that horrible writers block crept up on me again. So I hope you all understand why I have delayed posting this for so long.

I want to thank all my lovely readers for their support not just on this story but the other two as well. Hopefully I haven't lost you all.

Anyway enough rambling. Here's the first chapter and I aim to update every couple of days. I hope you all enjoy it and please let me know what you think.

Summary: So this is the third instalment, a continuation of Home Sweet Home and Fighting Back.

Follow the story as Jax tries to find the balance between his family and his club as well as trying to get over the disappearance of Nicole.

Clay struggles to stay afloat as greed over takes him and Gemma fights to keep her rein as Queen as she battles with past demons.

Can Samcro survive can Tara and her family. Will they ever find Nicole and what happens if they do.

What happens when all truths are revealed.

Everything Changes 

Chapter one.

He tried to listen, even threw in the odd grunt every now and then. He should be giving his full attention to his brothers, he knew that but he also knew that they weren't going to be discussing anything to important, as all the heavy details had already been discussed and agreed upon before their release, so this was just a general catch up. The main source of conversation being Charming Heights and Roosevelt.

Jax rolled his eyes at the thought of the new Sheriff. They'd had the pleasure of running into him on their way back into Charming. He hadn't wasted a second whacking his dick out. Asshole thought he was getting the better of them by warning them that if he spotted any Son that had just be released wearing an SOA cut that the cut would become his. _Yeah right. _

No brother would willingly hand over their cut, especially to a piece of shit copper. They would rather die first.

Thinking about Roosevelt just made his mood even worse. He was so over this right now all he wanted was to be left alone. Left alone so he could think about what he was going to do. So when he heard the Clay slam down the gavel Jax was on his feet and heading for his dorm without so much as looking at his brothers or even the rest of his family that were waiting in the bar. He needed space.

* * *

Closing the door to his dorm he was drawn to the bottom door of his night stand, or more to the hidden bottle of Jack Daniels inside. Pulling it out and uncapping it he took a large and much needed drink from the bottle before dropping onto his bed.

He had been counting the months, weeks, days and hours till his release and finally the day had come. He was a free man and he should be ecstatic that he was back where he belonged back with his sons and the woman he loved but he just couldn't do it. When he had pulled into the T/M parking lot he felt his chest expanded with joy when he saw everyone's family and friends lined up outside but it quickly vanished when he scanned all the bodies and remembered that she was still gone. And suddenly his happy family reunion wasn't so happy and his family wasn't so whole.

He tried to think positively, tried to reminded himself that Nicole was a fighter and she would be okay, that she was probably living the high life somewhere, Charming and everyone in it but a distant memory. But no matter how hard he tried to convince himself he knew that it was a lie.

Nicole was tough no doubt about it, growing up in the MC had made her that way but at the same time she had two weaknesses.

Weakness one. She ran.

Whenever something got too much, or to difficult then she ran, it was like her default which is why when Gemma broke the news to him that Nicole had gone he wasn't exactly surprised. And he wasn't surprised that they hadn't found her, that was another thing she was good at, another thing that growing up in this life had taught her, how to cover her tracks. Nevada proved that.

But it was thinking about Nevada that made him nervous for her. She ran to Nevada because she couldn't cope in Charming after all that shit went down with Darby junior but she ended up running back home when she ended up getting herself into trouble. Trouble that left her battered and bruised.

That was weakness Number two.

It had been 14 months without any word from her and considering the situation that had made her run, the situation that he was to blame for, he was worried that she was going to find herself once again in a whole lot of trouble, that she couldn't handle.

He took another large pull from the bottle of Whisky.

He knew he shouldn't have listened to Clay, he should have gone with his gut and told her the plan, rather than trying to warn her with stupid hints that he knew she would never get. Who would get them?

His free hand ran over his weary face and up over his freshly cut hair. Falling flat onto the bed as he closed his eyes trying to silence the doubts and what if's.

"Hey Baby." Propping himself up on his elbows he saw his mother looming by the doorway. He sat up properly and rolled his eyes when he heard his mothers heels move closer to him. And when she took a seat beside him he knew he was in for one of his mothers famous lectures.

Gemma placed her hand over his. She was worried for her son. She knew that he was struggling with Nicole's disappearance, but she thought that being out seeing Tara, his boys may have taken the edge off the bitterness that had materialised during his stay in Stockton, and she thought it had until he stopped himself, made himself remember that she was gone.

He was taking the fall, shouldering all the blame for her disappearance but It wasn't his to bare. This is what Nicole did, it was her MO and Jax knew that which is why he shouldn't be beating himself up, it wasn't going to help anyone especially his family that needed him. Tara had done well but now, as her Old Man Jax had to step up to the plate be the man. They needed that from Jax and so did the club.

"She did good." Gemma informed. She watched the small twitch on her sons lips as he allowed himself to actually smile.

"Yeah." Jax had no doubt that Tara would cope. If it had been a year ago he may have been worried that she would bail like before, but after Kohn he knew she was finally in their relationship for good just like he was just like he had been even during their 10 year gap.

"She kept her shit together." Gemma leaned over and grabbed the bottle out of his other hand that was dangling by his leg in attempt to hide the bottle, but she'd clocked the bottle of Jack before he even realised that she was standing at the door. "Now you have to handle yours." She told him firmly pulling the bottle out from his hand.

Jax bit at the corner of his lip, his eyes turning away from Gemma. He knew she was right but he couldn't just forget his cousin especially being back here, there were just to many memories.

"She'll find her way home baby, always does." Jax let out a ragged breath. Getting to his feet he ran his fingers over his cropped hair again as he tried to push down his anger.

He was sick of hearing that shit. Of course at first the whole club was doing there bit to try and find her but they just kept coming up with nothing and as time passed everyone believed that she had done what she had before, took some time out to sort herself out just like Nevada, and it was after Clay reached that decision that everyone started offering comforts to him, S_he'll find her way home, she'll be okay, she's a fighter. _It didn't comfort him in fact it just pissed him off, because people just didn't get it. This wasn't like the last time.

"I swear I hear that shit again..." He trailed off to angry to put a proper sentence the floor for a second or two he found his way back to his bed where he sat down next to his mother again. "I just want to make sure she's okay, I NEED her to be okay."

"We all do baby but this..." She shook the bottle of Whisky in front of him. "Isn't going to help find her is it?"

"What am I supposed to do, it my fault..." This time is was Gemma's time to get angry.

"No it's not, this is what she does this is how she deals. Remember Nicole is not stupid." Jax huffed. Nicole may not be stupid but she knew how to get herself into some fucked up situations. Ignoring his obvious disagreement Gemma continued. "She runs Jax you of all people know this and if she had got herself into some trouble then you also know this would be the first place she would come to."

"No not this time. She believes that this club killed me."

"Yes she does." Gemma snapped growing tired of this self pity bullshit party her son was throwing for himself. "But just like you and Op she was raised in this club, she understands it. She may hate what she thinks this club did to you but trust me she also understands why. She will come home Jax, that I promise you."

"So what I'm supposed to just sit back and do nothing. She could be anywhere she could be DEAD and you expect me to nothing." Again Jax had found his way to his feet but this time losing his fight to keep his growing anger contained as he stood toe to toe with his mother who had also jumped to feet, her own anger starting seep out.

"Your supposed go out there and be an Old man to your Old Lady and a father to your two sons, the VP to this club." Gemma's hand reached into the back pocket of her skin tight jeans where she pulled out a small paper brown bag. Taking hold of one of Jax's hands she shoved the bag into his palm. "The one you wanted. Now are you going to be the man I know you to be, the man your Old Lady needs you to be, or are you just going to keep hiding out here, going over old shit that can't be changed. The choice is yours but you better make the right one Jackson." Gemma closed his hands around the bag and walked away from him.

On her way out she bumped into Kozik who standing in the doorway. Neither her or Jax had noticed his presence till now, but Gemma hoped that maybe realising that one of his brothers may have just been witness to his little pity party that it may have given him the wake up call as to how pathetic he was being.

Brushing past Kozik Gemna stormed down the hallway the click of her heels echoing throughout.

"Clay's ready to head out man." Kozik told him as he eyes left the retreating Queen and went back to Jax, who was placing whatever it was that Gemma had given him into the inside pocket of his cut.

"Al'right man I'll be out in a sec."

Kozik gave a slight nod of his head before turning his back on him and forcing himself out of the room.

* * *

As he walked down the hall to go and get Jax like Clay had asked him to, he couldn't help but overhear the conversation taking place between Jax and Gemma.

And although he knew that he probably shouldn't be listening he found himself staying put and leaning in closer so he could hear better.

He could hear the sombreness in Jax's voice as he spoke. The man was clearing hurting, the loss of his cousin had effected him more than himself or any of his brothers had originally thought. And when he heard Jax say that he just needed to know if she was okay Kozik almost ran in there and told him, but he hadn't because what he had to say would probably just make things worse.

He needed more, needed something solid.

* * *

Stepping out into the parking lot he strolled over to his bike retrieving his helmet that was hanging on the handlebars. Before he put in on he noticed Juice a few bikes down, he was exactly the person he needed. Replacing his helmet he made his way over to the computer whiz kid.

"Hey man." Juice looked up from his bike that he was straddling and looked at Kozik from behind his black sunglasses.

"Kozik, what's up man?"

"Well I kind of need a favour, shit I know you just got out..." Kozik ran a hand over his spiked blonde hair as he second guessed himself for like the millionth time. "You know what..doesn't matter man." He had already turned away from him whe Juice started calling him back.

"Hey..Look, it's fine I don't mind helping a brother out. And as for just getting out, look around. Think about what we're just about to do, shit we'll all probably end up in lock up by the end of the day." Juice answered with a smirk on his face, a smirk that Kozik returned.

They were just on their way to create a diversion so that Jax, Clay and Opie could get away from the eyes of the law that were currently and probably would be until further notice living up their collective asses. So Juice was right, what they were about to do was worse than what he was asking, well maybe.

"Right." He agreed his thumb rubbing over his eyebrow.

"So what's this favor?" Kozik snaked his cell from deep inside his cut pocket and scrolled through his contacts until he found the number he was looking for.

"Think you could trace this number get an address or some shit." Kozik asked forcing both the words out of his mouth as well as showing him the number. _Maybe this isn't a good idea._ Kozik thought to himself as he toyed with the idea of changing his mind yet again.

"Sure." Juice grabbed the cell from Kozik and copied the number into his phone before handing it back to Kozik who was rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet.

"I'll run the number see who took out the contract and where, piss easy, shouldn't take long."

"End of the day?"

"Yeah no worries." Juice handed him back the phone. He looked nervous as hell. Curiosity getting the better of him Juice opened his mouth. "So this some chick you've tapped or you wanna tap?" The cheeky smile Juice had on his face disappeared when Kozik's face darkened.

"What? What did you just say to me?"

"Uh..I just...I thought..."

"Well I'm not asking what you think I'm asking you as a senior brother to fuckin' do a job. Now if you can't fuckin' manage that without making fucking dipshit remarks then I think were gonna have a big fuckin' of a problem here."

"I'm sorry.."

"So we got a problem or.."

"No.." Juice shook his head for emphasis. "No problem. I shouldn't be asking this is your business not the club's."

_Actually it probably is the club's business. _Kozik thought. But until he knew more for now it was his.

"Just find out what you can." Kozik uttered his tone easing. Looking at Juice's scared face Kozik started to feel a little bad for losing it with him. God all this was driving him mad. "Whatever you find just come to me first okay." Juice nodded. "I'll explain everything." Slightly confused by the last words, Juice decided to keep his mouth shut afraid that he might offend the blonde biker again. So he gave another nod his head in a silent agreement.

* * *

The meeting with the Russians hadn't done much to improve Jax's mood. Putlova, the man responsible for ordering the retaliation, that left Jax with three small puncture wounds just below his left peck had just tried to screw them over again this time for money.

50% The Russians were demanding for holding their guns and it was total bullshit. He was glad that Samcro's relationship with them was coming to end. And it was because of that, that he didn't pitch a fit in the Jelly Bean and kill Putlova right there.

Opening the door to the home he hadn't stepped inside of for 14months, he took a minute to let his eyes look over everything. Nothing had changed which he was thankful for, it was a comfort because everything else was changing and unfortunately he knew that there was more change to come. Some good but most of it bad.

Closing the door and moving further inside his house he was met by the one thing that actually made him smile, a true smile that reached his eyes. He loved the woman standing in front of him and truly had missed her.

"Hey." She spoke in that angelic voice he had missed many a night as he tried to sleep on the uncomfortable cot in his cell. "Kids are ou..."

She never got to finish. Jax had closed the gaping hole that lay between them in two massive strides, his arms wrapping around her perfect little body that he'd been craving to touch, caress, trail kisses all over. He lifted her off the floor and pulled her close as he buried his head into the crook of her neck, a small girlish giggle escaping from her lips.

"I missed you." She said seriously as he put her feet back on to the floor. Her eyes staring deeply into his as her hands cupped his face.

"Me to."

"I love you."

"I love you more." It was corny shit, as soon as he said the words he wanted to kick his own ass for being such a pussy, but it didn't change the fact that the words were true. He loved her with all his heart and always had. She had changed his world and soon she would find out exactly how much but first he had something much more important he wanted, no something he needed to do.

Another squeal fell from her lips as he threw her over his shoulder and carried her into their bedroom laying here on the bed where he planned to ravish everything inch of her.


	2. Chapter 2

Everything Changes 

Chapter two

Lieutenant Eli Roosevelt slammed his radio onto his desk. He was pissed, pissed at the stupidity of his own officers.

Currently two of his officers had not one but 7 members of Samcro handcuffed on the side of the road. According to his officers they had boxed them in stopping them for being able to follow Morrow, Teller and Winston. Growing annoyed the officer admitted to Roosevelt that he had clipped one of them with his car. _Idiot_ was the first thought that jumped into Roosevelt's mind, but as the officer continued recounting the events _Fucking idiot _rang through his head, and it was on the tip of his tongue to tell the officers that, but that wasn't exactly professional and being professional was what Roosevelt was about so he settled on pointing out exactly what they had done wrong, which was basically everything.

Which left him with no other choice but to order the Sons to be released.

This was not the start Roosevelt wanted. When they had rolled into Charming this morning he was there to greet them, there to show them that things had changed and that Charming was no longer their playground.

He proved that by warning them that if he saw anyone who had just been released wearing a cut that they would become his property.

It was a good play he thought. It told them that he wasn't messing around and that he wouldn't be scared nor bullied by Samcro. He took a stand, and it was met by exactly what he had expected, Resistance. But Roosevelt was ready for the games to begin although if his officers kept playing straight into Samcro's hands then it was going to make things a lot harder. Samcro may be a bunch of outlaws but they were smart.

But this wasn't his first Rodeo. He knew how gangs worked, and he also knew how to neutralise them.

At the moment Roosevelt was brought from his thoughts when someone knocked on his door, someone who could be exactly what he was looking for.

"Sheriff Roosevelt, Linc Potter." Roosevelt watched the lithe man with a mop of brown hair let himself into his office. "Assistant US Attorney." The man continued to introduce himself. "I have uh..I uh...have a card here somewhere." Roosevelt watched the man pat down the many pockets of his long deep brown leather jacket before searching in the back pockets of his dark jeans where he found the card he was looking for. "Ah." The card was completely crumpled and this Linc Potter started to straighten it out before handing to him. "Here you go."

Eli tried to stop his face from showing what he thought about the man in front of him, which was that he was stark raving mad.

Accepting the creased card, which he had to check was real, because the man in front of him did not look or act like a US Attorney, not any of the ones he had met before anyway.

"Nice to meet you." Roosevelt extended his hand out to this Linc Potter, after finishing his check on the card, which seemed real enough to him.

"Likewise." Linc answered with the biggest smile. _Crazy._ Roosevelt thought again. "We're renting some space up here on the third floor." Linc took the seat that Roosevelt was pointing to.

"Yeah I've seen you guys coming and going. So what can I do for you?"

"Well I was wondering if maybe you would like to drop by sometime. Maybe I could bounce a few things off of you."

"Okay." Now Roosevelt was interested in this crazy fool. "Officially?"

"Yes. I talked to Sheriff Moore and your clear to join us."

"Okay." Another big smile, which Eli thought was creepy, spread onto the man's face.

"Good. I look forward to our talk later. Goodbye Sheriff." And with that he slid out of his office and disappeared as quickly as he had appeared.

_Crazy. _Roosevelt shook his head and went on with his day wondering what exactly this little talk of theirs would concern.

* * *

Tara snuggled against his side, her finger tracing over the Abel tattoo on his chest as the arm underneath her pulled her closer. Her man.

Of course she had missed the sex, but it was moments like these that Tara had truly missed. She missed the feel of his arms being wrapped aound her as he pulled her close, she missed the stable sound of his beating heart echoing in her ear as she lay her head on his chest. It was moments like these that she regretted leaving him and running off to Chicago. She had missed 10 years, 10 years of countless moments, memories that she would never know. But she didn't want to think about what she had missed, what they had missed not being together, no all she wanted to focus on was their future.

She had read those letters from Maureen, the letters she had found the night Jax had been taken away from her. She had read and re-read them trying to make some sort of sense at of them, while at the same time hoping that what they were insinuating towards was in fact a lie. She kind of needed it to be lie because if the information was true then nothing good would come from it- although she knew clinging that hope was a waste of time. She hadn't breathed a word to anyone, well expect Piney. She hadn't told him about the details of the letters but she had asked Piney a few questions about John and Clay's relationship and about the day he had died. She figured as one of the longest serving members and John's good friend he might be able to shed some light on the whole thing give her a different perspective. But all he did was shoot her down and tell her to leave that history alone. She knew she should have listened to his warning but she didn't instead she found herself becoming more intrigued by the whole thing and that was when she went to the public records and pulled up the incident report on John's accident. It was that piece of evidence that made her start thinking that there was some truth to Maureen Ashbys letters. And it was those thoughts that made her start realising how dangerous Charming could be, or rather how dangerous Clay and Gemma could be.

As she felt his strong fingers run through her hair she stopped thinking about those god damn letters and returned her attention to man beside her, her man, the man she loved more than anything in this world, apart from from her two little boys. As she lifted her head slightly so she could look up at him she realised that she wasn't the only one that had something else on their mind. And it didn't take a genius to figure what it was or rather who.

"You miss her, don't you?" Jax turned his attention from the ceiling he had been staring at and onto her. He didn't need to ask who she was referring to, it could only be one person.

"Yeah."

"She'll be fine Jax, she's to..."

"Don't." Jax snapped as he moved further up the bed so he was leaning against the headboard.

Tara felt his arm and fingers fall away from her as he shifted up the bed. She didn't know what she had done wrong but she had obviously said something wrong if he was moving away from her.

"Jax I just..."

"I know." He felt like a dick snapping at her especially when he stared into those deep hazel eyes, eyes that were looking at him like he had just kicked her puppy or some shit. _Dick, absolute fucking dick. _Taking her hand he pulled her closer to him again. "I never meant to snap at you but I'm jus..I'm..." He wiped his hand over his face. He didn't know how to explain how he was feeling about this whole Nicole thing except for desperate. Desperate to find her and make sure she is and has been okay.

"I know. You love her and that you miss her and your worried." Her hand rested over the tops his. "I understand all of that, but I'm here Jax."

When her lips touched the skin on his cheek Jax knew that now was probably as good as time as any to tell her, ask her. Okay he hadn't been exactly what he had planned, truthfully he hadn't planned on how he was going to do this but he figured maybe this was the right place, the right time scenario he had been thinking of. They had just made love and were basking in the afterglow of that. When would there be a better time. But first he had to tell before he asked.

"When I was inside it gave me a lot of time to think about shit, mostly you and the boys and our future. I love you Tara and my boys more than anything in this word and I want to do right by you."

"You do." Jax shook his head.

"No I don't. I missed Abel taking his first steps, say his first word. I missed the birth of our child and I missed all that because I was banged up."

"Jax.."

"No let me get this out al'right, I need to say this." Tara nodded and continued to listen to what it was he had say. "I've made a lot of mistakes and everytime I've made a mistake or the club has someone I love always ends up paying the price. Donna, Gemma, you, my children, Nic." Tara had to bite her lip from saying something, reassuring him that he was not to blame for all that but she had promised, so she continued to keep quiet but her grip on his hand tightened.

"As much as I hate that she's gone, and I need to find her, maybe Nicole has the right idea. Getting out." Tara's jaw practically dropped. She couldn't believe that he had just said that. It was exactly what she had been thinking, but she thought that she would have to drag Jax out of Charming but yet here he was telling her he wanted out. She just hoped that this wasn't some sick joke.

"I'm done with Samcro darlin. Being inside opened my eyes, Nic leaving opened my eyes. I don't want this life for us anymore, I don't want this life for our children. I don't want them wondering where their Daddy is and I don't want you to have to be the one to tell them that I'm inside doing another stint or worse..."

"Don't." Tara felt herself shudder with thought.

"Things are changing and I don't think it's for the best."

"Why..why what's going on Jax?" He rubbed his thumb over her cheek hoping to ease her worry somewhat.

"Nothing to drastic just a lot of changes. We made a new alliance when we were on the inside, struck up a deal, a deal which is going to see Samcro earning a lot more cash."

"That sounds risky Jax. I can go anywhere Jax I make good money I could..." Jax shook his head his tongue running over his lower lip as he looked away from her for a brief moment.

"I ain't living off my wife." He knew he sounded like a caveman but he just couldn't allow himself to do that. He had been brought up to be a man, a man that provided for his family and take care of them not sit on his ass while his woman worked her ass off and paid for everything. It wasn't how he was made. "Look Clay hands are going. His days are numbered. When he steps down that's when he looses sway that's when I get out."

"The manuscript your father wrote, he talked about getting out Jax."

"JT was a coward." Jax said firmly and Tara realised that the anger that showed when she had mentioned Nicole was back. "He lost himself on Irish Pussy and bailed on his family. Instead of writing about it he should have done something. He should have taken me Thomas and Nicole out of Charming."

"Gemma would never have let him leave, she won't let you and neither will Clay." Flashes of what were written in those letters ran through Tara's mind. She didn't dare imagine how Gemma and Clay would try and stop them from leaving.

"Tough. I don't give a shit what they have to stay this is my decision. I'm sick of this life Tara, sick of the shit that comes with it."

"And what about Nicole?" It was a question she didn't really want to ask. She knew how much they loved one another, they had always been there for another through everything and this wouldn't be any different, which is why she was worried.

If Nicole came back here she knew that she would get sucked back into this life, Charming just had a way of doing that. So she feared that if Nicole was going to stay then maybe Jax would be sucked back in as well. Because if there was anyone who Tara feared could take Jax away from her, put a stop to this plan of leaving Charming in the rear view it was Nicole.

"I have to find her Tara check she's okay."

"I know you do, that wasn't what I meant. I meant what if she comes back, what if she comes back and plans to stay in Charming?"

"Then the plan doesn't change." Tara wished she believed that but she knew it would change things. Sensing her doubt Jax moved out of the bed and walked over to his cut that had been discarded on the floor. Picking it up he went into the inside pocket and pulled out a small brown bag.

Sitting back down on the bed he took her left hand in his. Tara's heart skipped a beat as her eyes landed the dimond encursted ring he pulled from the bag.

"Is that..."

"Yeah." He said with a huge smile on his face. "I want us to be a proper family. This ring is a promise. Everything I've said today I promise you I will come through on. So Tara Knowles if you would..." He was cut off when Tara's lips pressed against his. Jax pulled away laughing. "I take that as a yes?" Tara nodded enthusiastically before leaning in and kissing him again.

##########################

Kozik sat at the table alone, beer in one hand a smoke in the other as he watched the happy couples on the dance floor. Opie was dancing with his kid Ellie, Lyla with her kid as well as her new stepson Kenny, Gemma and Tara were also up there mimicking each others dance moves as they laughed together. They all looked happy, but as his eyes wondered from the dance floor he found one very unhappy face.

Jax was sat alone at a table just like Kozik except instead of a beer in his hand it was glass of Whiskey and he was minus the smoke, but the look on his face Kozik really thought he could do with one.

Kozik knew exactly why Jax was sitting there alone with a that gloomy look darkening his face, he also knew that it had nothing to do with what had just gone down in the woods behind them. That he had just pushed the blade of a knife into Putlova's body three times in exactly the same places he had been stabbed while in Stockton as Kozik held Putlova still. That look had nothing to do with that, the darkening look was because he was twisted up over Nicole, and Kozik couldn't feel more shit about it.

Before Juice had left the wedding along with Chibs, Bobby and Happy to go and take care of the rest of Russians at the other end, he had told Kozik what he had found which unfortunately was nothing.

Kozik had used his best charm offensives to persuade the councillor at the NA meeting to give him Nicole's information. It was a long shot he knew that most people who went to those meeting rarely gave their real names let alone any other information, he should know he'd been to his fair few, but just out of sheer dumb luck the girl had a cell number for Nicole which she willingly gave to him along with hers, it was amazing what a flash of his pearly whites could get him.

But unfortunately that cell number turned out to be a pre-pay. _Smart bitch. _He mused to himself. On one hand he was proud that she still had her smarts about her but on the other hand those smarts, that had been ingrained in her from birth, that was making it so fucking difficult to find her. Which he guessed was exactly what she wanted.

He should have called her. But it wasn't like he hadn't thought about it, in fact his finger had hovered over the call button many a night but something had always stopped him.

He always wondered what had stopped him but seeing Happy and Gemma in the same room tonight was like a slap to the face and he was reminded of the ultimatum Gemma had made 14 months ago. The ultimatum where she had told him to take Nicole as he old lady or she would tell Jax and Clay what had happened between them when Nicole was only 16.

Some people would think he was just being a selfish prick for not calling her or for not following up this lead earlier, but Kozik didn't care what happened to himself he was a little more concerned about what that ultimatum would mean for Nicole and he thought that maybe she might have been better off where she was, but as soon as he saw Jax, overheard the conversation between him and his mother he realised that he had made a mistake.

Which was why he was now reaching out to Juice for help, and why he was really considering telling Jax although he wasn't sure how this little titbit of information was actually going to help Jax, telling him that he had stumbled across her at an NA meeting...Jax was not going to like that.

Taking the last drag of his cigarette he leant across the table to stub it out in the ashtray finally deciding to go over to Jax and face whatever punishment he deemed fit for keeping this secret. But before he could even get to his feet he watched Jax pull Tara- who had now left Gemma on the dance floor dancing with Unser- onto his lap and for the first time a genuine smile graced his lips before Tara covered his lips with hers as she wrapped her arms around his neck. Kozik knew now wasn't the right time.

"Thought I was supposed to be the miserable bastard around here." Tearing his eyes away from the loved up couple he turned to face Piney who was settling himself in the empty chair across from him. His oxygen tank in one hand a bottle of Tequila in other. "What's with the long face?"

"Can I ask you something?" Kozik asked cautiously, his eyes briefly leaving Piney's for a second before returning.

"Sure."

"If you knew something, something that you think someone else should know, but you don't exactly have all the information..."

"Spit it out boy." Kozik ran a hand over his spiky hair, taking a much needed breath.

"If you knew something that you thought someone should know would you tell them?" Piney took a swig of Tequlia before even attempting to try an answer Kozik's confusing question.

But as he knocked back the Tequila he watched his younger bothers eyes shift over to Jax and his Old Lady, and not for the fist time. And he wasn't to sure he liked the way he was looking at them.

"This thing you have to tell, you think it would help that person, or make things worse?"

Kozik really didn't know the answer to that. Truth was the Club still had feelers out for Nicole but had always come up with nothing but this one bit of information, although it wasn't much could help, give Jax a little hope. But again he wasn't sure if it would bring him comfort.

"Maybe."

"Well my advice is don't tell them not until you have all the details anyway." Kozik nodded that was exactly what he had been thinking. He didn't actually know anything he was just guessing, she might not have been at that meeting for her, she couldn't been there for a friend. _Yeah right._

"Thanks Pine..."

"But." Piney started cutting off Kozik's thank you. "If this secret is club related." This time he looked over to Jax and Kozik's eyes followed him. "Then you have to tell someone. Secrets don't work with this club son, they destroy everything." And with those wise words Piney left the table, leaving Kozik to mull over what he had just said, leaving him to come to the conclusion he had known along, which was he had to say something, and should have four months ago.


	3. Chapter 3

Everything Changes

Chapter Three

Gemma stirred the oatmeal in a daze. Her mind having drifted away from the task at hand and back to what she had found last night while tucking Abel in for the night.

When she had picked up the fallen piece paper off the floor Gemma felt her already fragile heart stop for a second when she read the words hidden beneath the bright colours of Abel's crayons.

_Dear Jackson, _

_The truth about your father_

_is written in these letters_

_you should know John _

_like I did_

The letter was signed with the name she thought she had heard and seen the last of 14 months ago. _Maureen Ashby. _It had been hard enough going to Belfast and facing John's past, discovering the daughter she had known nothing about, another one of JT's dirty little secrets. But now it seemed that his past had come to haunt her again but this time maybe bringing her and Clay's dirty little secrets to light rather than his own.

Brought from her thoughts as her husbands arms wrapped around her waist, she painted on a smile and looked over her shoulder before placing a kiss on her husbands cheek.

"Morning. Thought I'd let you sleep in."

"Your to good to me." He kissed the back of her neck as she returned her attention to the pot on the stove, before taking a seat at the long kitchen table where seconds later Gemma appeared placing a cup of joe in front of him, made just the way he liked it. _I'm one hell of a lucky bastard._

As Clay took a couple of sips of his coffee, the coffee he had missed, he noticed that his wife was looking at him and not in and admiring way from having missed him she was looking at him like she had something to say. Taking one last sip of his coffee enjoying it for one more second before giving his attention to his wife, where he started off reassuring her guessing that she had probably read the morning papers where their little retaliation at the wedding last night was bound to be the headlines. Especially considering they had dumped the Russian bodies in the building ground of the New Charming Heights.

"It was just part of the process, you don't have to worry we're protected."

"I'm not worried about that." And the truth was she wasn't. Clay was careful, smart so if he had hit out at the Russians he wouldn't go at it blind. It was the note that was now in her hand ready to show Clay that was causing her worry. "This fell outta one of Abel's colouring books. He must have found it somewhere in Jax's house." Clay took the letter from his wife and read it carefully. His brows furrowing.

"Letters?"

"Maureen Ashby. Trying to turn my son against me. Bitch must have stuffed it in his bag before we left Belfast." Clay could see his wife getting more and more wound up as spoke. Maureen Ashby was a difficult topic for her to talk about in fact come to think about it Gemma hadn't uttered a word about Belfast or that bitch until now.

"And you think Jax read them?"

"It had to be either Jax or Tara who found them." Gemma snapped as she massaged her temples trying to stop the headache she could feel coming at her full force.

"This is probably nothing."

"Nothing, Jesus Clay you know as well as I do what those letters could contain. Hate, suspicion...Who knows what John confided to that Irish Gash."

"If what you think really was in there this woulda blown up by now." Clay took her shaking hand in his larger one. "We're good." Gemma shook her head refusing to look at him so Clay hooked his other hand under her chin, tilting her head up leaving her no other choice but to look at him. "We're good." He repeated, this time a little firmer, as were his next words spoken. "Don't go stirring shit up."

"I don't do that.." Clay threw her a knowing look. "Okay maybe I do that...sometimes." A smile spread across his face. She leant over and kissed his cheek. "I've got to go."

"I love you." He called after her.

"Love you to baby."

Clay sank into the chair he was sitting in as the door closed behind Gemma. He had lied to her, there was something to worry about. Maureen Ashby was a dunk ass crazy Irish bitch, who had a tendency to stick her nose where it wasn't welcomed. And this little stunt of hers proved that.

He knew she would never have put those letters into Jax's bag unless they had something she thought Jax should know, something that she didn't have the gut's to stay to his face or in the presence of Samcro._ Fucking bitch._

But he knew if there was anything incrimating in those letters and Jax had read him then he wouldn't being sitting where he was now he would be joining JT on the other side, because Jax would kill him, that he had no doubt about.

And that left only one other option. Tara. It was the only thing that made any sense, and if she had found them he knew it was probably only a matter of time before she showed them to Jax and that was the last thing anyone wanted or needed. Especially Clay.

They had a meeting with Gallindo today and he needed Jax to be on his side he needed his support on this new deal.

So all he had to do was make sure Tara continued to keep those letters to herself. But the only question he had was how.

He would have to tread very carefully especially if she knew shit. Going at her hard, threatening her would only push her to tell Jax, he had to go about this the other way. Bring her in close reminded her that family was important that she had just got Jax back, her family was together and she wouldn't want to do anything that could jeopardise that.

_It's never an easy ride. _He thought as he pushed away from the table to get a bowl of Oatmeal. The day that lay ahead of him, he was going to need a solid start.

* * *

_'Charming California was rocked this morning by the discovery of four bodies_

_ found at a local housing development. Details are still coming in _

_but we have learned that the victims were shot several times...'_

Tara shut of the T.V. It was too early to be hearing that and plus she was still basking in the joys of being engaged to the man she loved. She didn't want anything to spoil that not yet anyway.

They had made a decision to keep their engagement a secret for now. They wanted to wait for the right time, and something told her that the right time wouldn't be happening until Jax had found Nicole.

She was okay with keeping quiet last night because she didn't want to steal the limelight from Opie and Lyla, even if Samcro had taken it upon themselves to dish out their own dose of punishment to those four bodies that had just been reported on the news, during the wedding party.

However Tara wasn't so keen on this waiting for Nicole thing. Jax hadn't come right out and said it but Tara could tell that when he said '_We'll find the right time babe, when we're all together.' _She read between the lines.

It wasn't that she didn't care for Nicole she did. But she needed for her family to get out of Charming and the headline this morning reminded her of that.

"Morning." Tara looked up from the seat she had now taken at the kitchen table. Thomas still nuzzled against her side. Smiling up at her Fiancé and her eldest son who was being carried by his Daddy.

"Morning."

Jax placed Abel onto his feet as he took a seat at the table watching Tara as she fed Thomas. Something was on her mind he could tell, could see that her mind was working overtime and Jax wondered what had his wife to be so wound up especially at this hour.

"You al'right?" Tara looked up at Jax when she heard his question.

"Yeah." She answered forcing a smile onto her lips.

"Right." He countered disbelievingly.

"I heard the headlines." Tara couldn't believe that she was choosing to have this conversation rather than discuss the fact that she was worried about what would happen if Nicole came back.

"How much do you want know?"

"All of it...but not now. Later?" Jax nodded he could understand, who would want to discuss their Fiancé killing a man over their morning cereal. "Your mothers on her way over and then Neeta comes at noon. Is that okay?"

"Yeah that's good. I don't want to mess with their routine." Tara reached across the table and took hold of his hand.

"It's good having you back home." Jax leant across the table and kissed her before pulling back ever so slightly.

"It's good to be home babe." He kissed her again, but this time the door opening and the sound of his mothers voice ringing through the house pulled them apart. "Great timing as always." Jax whined as he moved to sit back down. Tara just shook her head laughing.

* * *

Sliding his hooded black jacket over his cut Jax was about ready to leave, to go and meet Clay. When he turned to see his mother leaning against the door frame to his bedroom.

"Hey baby." Jax smiled at his mother as he walked over to her. Moving from the doorway Gemma flattened down the hooded jacket, her hands lingering on his chest. "You doing okay, you with us?"Jax looked at her confused, the lines on his forehead creasing. He didn't like the question and worse he didn't like the look in her eyes, so sad. Which was a very unfamiliar emotion for his mother.

"What are you talkin' about?" Even though Clay had told her not to worry about those letters it didn't stop her. Family was everything to her and the thought of losing that, losing Jax killed her.

"Yesterday I didn't mean to get mad at you..." Jax sighed in relief. She was feeling guilty for the way she had spoken to him yesterday that was all no big secret was about to be relieved.

If only he knew that he was completely wrong.

"You were right Mom. I couldn't just sit there drinkin' my problems away. I have responsibilities. I know that now." He placed her hand over hers that was still resting on his chest. But just as he was starting to ease, Gemma set off his alarm bells again.

"I love you more than anything in this world Jackson. You know that right?"

Jax was really confused this wasn't his mother, she may always tell him that she loves him but not like this not with that look lingering look in her eyes a look he couldn't quite figure out. Wrapping his arms around her he pulled her close giving her a bone crushing hug. Hoping that this along with his words reassuring her that he loved to would hopefully calm whatever insecurities or worry she was feeling. Because unfortunately he didn't have the time to delve any deeper.

* * *

"Gemma okay this morning?" Clay looked away from the approaching man and over to his stepson sitting in the drivers seat of the tow truck.

He tried to judge the look on his face. Pleased that he wasn't staring into the eyes of a man who was about to kill him, and rather the eyes of a concerned son.

"Yeah. Time got to her I think." Clay recalled the conversation with Gemma yesterday after they had just '_reconnected'_with one another. She had made him promise no more time, and considering his recent stint inside he had no qualms in making that promise to the woman he loved. "Why she say something?"

"Not really just a little emotional this morning."

"Hormones Son." Jax laughed along with Clay. He was glad that was all that was bothering her. He had so much on his plate right trying to figure out his escape route and how he was going to track down Nicole, worrying about his mothers mental state was one thing he could without.

"Their waiting for you inside." The owner of scrap yard told them, having finally reached their tow truck.

"Keep the crusher on. Make it a little noisy." Clay requested as Jax forked over a small amount of cash to the man.

Pulling the tow truck deeper into the yard, they found Alvarez along with two of his men waiting for the. Removing their jackets, revealing their cuts they walked over to Alvarez exchanging handshakes. By the time they had finished they all turned their attention on to the three men who had just stepped out of the 4x4.

"Clay, Jax. This is Romero Parada." Alvarez introduced the Mexican man as.

"Friends call me Romeo." He spoke with a rasp that could rival Happy's.

"Nice to meet you, man." Clay smiled with a big grin.

"Thank you for coming." Jax added.

After introducing his men Santos and Luis, Romeo wanted to get down to business, Clay and Jax were eager to oblige.

Showing off the new merch and letting Santos and Luis have a little play with them, each firing a few rounds. Happy with the products they moved onto crunching numbers and neither Jax or Clay could help but smile as the numbers seemed to be falling in their favour.

But the smile quickly disappeared from Jax's face when he heard a new part of the deal, a part he had heard nothing about prior to now. But one look at Clay's unphased expression Jax realised this wasn't the first time he was hearing about it.

Biting the inside of his cheek, stopping himself from throwing a fit right there he continued to listen as Clay and Romeo discussed the apparent shipment of Coke that Samcro would apparently be running on their next scheduled gun run.

After another round of handshakes sealing the deals that had just been made, Jax couldn't wait to get back to the truck so he could ask Clay what the fuck he was playing at. But before they made it there Romeo called Clay back.

"Here." Clay accepted the file that Romeo was extending towards him.

"What this?"

"Open it, trust me you'll like what's inside." Curious Clay flipped open the folder, his eyes going wide by what he was looking at. Sparing a brief glance at Jax who he could tell was already wound tight, he knew that this was either going to help or make things worse. Closing the file his let his eyes fall back onto Romeo.

"How did you..."

"I have many contacts Clay."

"Thankyou." Romeo nodded and walked back to his vehicle just like Clay and Jax did.

* * *

"We're trafficking blow now?" Jax snapped as Clay closed the door to the tow truck.

"We're just mulling it. Mayans are chopping and distributing." Clay tried to reason, even though he knew it wouldn't make a difference.

"Jesus Christ." Jax hit the steering wheel out of pure frustration. He needed to lash out and rather the steering wheel than Clay's face. For now anyway.

"I had no choice son. It was part of the deal. The Russians needed to die for what they did to you. The Gallindo Cartel is the only player deep enough to keep the Russians off our backs."

"Don't give me the _'I did it for you son' _bullshit you did this for yourself." Jax shouted turning away from him. "Who else knows?" he spoke after a minute or two.

"Nobody that's why your here. I need you to understand this."

"Understand what? That you forgot to mention that we'd also be running coke for the Gallindo Cartel. We voted in selling them guns Clay not drugs." Jax raged. He was really starting to lose his hold on his temper.

"Then we'll take another vote." Clay shouted. The tension between them was suffocating and Clay knew that continuing like this was going to get them nowhere. So he switched tactics and decided to be honest.

"The last two years almost wiped out me and your Mom. I've given my whole life to this club I don't want to walk away with nothing. You and I both know that I ain't got long left." He raised his hand for emphasis. "One maybe two years at the most."

"So you're cashing out." It was a statement not a question.

"Maybe." They both sighed deeply. "This vote we take it's gonna split the ranks I want you on my side with this." Although Jax hated all this he saw an opening. This was his way out, his families out. He hated that he would be taking advantage of this screwed up situation, lying to his brothers telling him he sided with Clay, even though he did not in the slightest, Samcro did not do drugs, but he had to think of his family, they we're his main priority no matter how much he loved his brothers, they came first.

"If I do this, if I back you, I'm out when your out."

"What the hell you talking about? You've wanted the gavel your whole life."

"Not anymore." Clay was blind sided. He had no clue, no idea what so ever that this was coming. He couldn't believe it, it made no sense. Jax was Samcro born and bred.

"What..What ya gonna do? Leave Samcro, what else you gonna do?"

"That doesn't matter I need your word that you're going to let me walk away. No recourse." Clay let out a heavy breath.

"What about your Mom?"

"She's an Old Lady Clay she's not a member."

"Can you really just walk away from your family?"

"I'm doing this for my family." Jax answered simply. _So this is how she's playing it. _Clay thought to himself. Listening to Jax it was becoming clear exactly what Tara motives were. She wants Jax out and he'd bet his life its because of what was in those letters of JT's.

But her plan could ruin his. Clay needed Jax to stay, take the gavel after he stepped down, he was the only man that was right for the job, plus with Jax at the gavel Clay wouldn't lose his club entirely he would still have a foot in the door.

Running his thumb over the folder sat on his leg he wondered if she would hold the answer, the key to making him stay. Knowing he had to do something he pushed the folder towards his stepson.

Looking at the folder that was now in his hands. He wondered what the contents of the folder held, because Clay seemed a little surprised by its contents. Flipping the cover open Jax couldn't believe what he was reading.

"What..the..how the hell did he get these?"

"Resources." Clay answered simply. Jax shook his head in disbelief. He wanted to find her more than anything but the thought of the Gallindo Cartel finding her. And judging by the pictures inside they'd been following her as well and that didn't sit well with Jax not one little bit."She looks good." Clay spoke breaking Jax out of his thoughts.

"Yeah."

"She can finally come home."

"No."

"No?" Clay really didn't get this. He thought by showing the folder to Jax he would want her back asap. That she would come back and Jax would stay. He knew their current separation had been hard for Jax and he just knew that it would have been even harder on Nicole considering she was still in belief that Jax was dead. "I thought you..."

"I don't want her around this Clay."

"But.."

"But nothing she's my cousin, my responsibility, this is my decision Clay and I want her left where she is. Safe from all this." Jax told him firmly. His mind was set as much as he hated the fact of leaving her put in LA, the thought of her coming back here, the thought of Clay bringing her into this shit trying to probably use her to make him stay he knew that she would be better off where she was for now, until he was sorted and out of Charming. "If you want me to back you on this cartel deal then you have to leave her alone to. Keep her out of this, it's the only way I'll support you."

Clay rubbed his hand across his furrowed brows. None of this was going the way he wanted it to. He needed this deal to happen and the only when it could happen was if he had Jax's backing. He had no other choice but to agree. Unable to really utter the words, knowing that it would make it all a little to real Clay nodded his head.

"No one finds out about this, not Gemma no one." Jax said referring to the information in his hands that he was now placing inside his cut.

"Okay."

And with that last word Jax turned over the engine and pulled out of the junkyard, poceeding towards the clubhouse where he started preparing himself to lie to his brothers.


	4. Chapter 4

Everything Changes

Chapter Four

Piney couldn't believe what he had just heard. Smacro did not do drugs, whether it was distributing or just mulling. Drugs were a big NO. It was dirty, dangerous and most all it was against everything the original 9 had dreamed of when they had created the Sons Of Anarchy.

He could understand Clay arranging this deal, he had always revelled in the outlaw side of the club life, enjoyed it so much that sometimes it was scary.

But Jax! Piney just couldn't get his head around the fact that he was backing Clay on this.

Drugs had nearly killed his first born, his cousin and his ex wife. The night Nicole had that car accident when she was 17 she had been high on crank and since that night he hated anything that related to drugs, Piney even remembered Jax giving up the pot for a very long time just to prove a point. He kicked Wendy to the curb as soon as he caught wind of her doing crank. So now, to hear that he was backing this Cartel deal Piney couldn't help but think that something wasn't right, which is why he was walking down the hall heading to Jax's dorm where he had disappeared to after Church. He needed to know what the hell was going on. BEcause none of it made a lick of sense to him.

* * *

Churrch had gone just like Jax had expected, which was not well. Everyone seemed to have an opinion on it, and not surprisingly most of the opinions voiced were not positive.

He felt like a traitor lying to his brothers telling them that this deal would be good for the club. It may be true, the money was good, a fact that his brothers seemed to agree with, but deep down just like his bothers he knew that this wasn't going to be a good move for Samcro.

But he'd made a promise to Tara he was getting them out of Charming, out of Samco and this deal was the only way he could see that happening, the only way he could afford for that to happen. So yeah he was being selfish but his family came first.

With that thought Jax pulled the folder out of his cut pocket and took a seat on the edge of his bed as he started looking through the information inside.

If the information in front of him was correct which he was pretty sure it was, Nicole was living in LA. Six hours away, that's how close she was and somehow they had all missed it, they'd all fucked up.

Placing the piece of paper onto his knee Jax started looking through the photos.

She looked good, happy, _At least that's something. _He thought to himself as he ran a hand over his cropped hair. He wanted to call her just so he could hear her voice, hear her tell him that she was okay, but couldn't. He knew if he did that she would be on the first flight back to Charming.

The Cartel had already found her, if she came back to Charming he was worried that Cartel might use her as leverage, well not her but the fact that they had found her.

She was better where she was, at least that was what he was trying to convince himself.

Unable to look at the folder any more he started placing the papers and pictures back inside when his door came flying open. Shocked by the disturbance Jax jumped to his feet, sending all the contents of the folder flying to the floor.

Watching the pictures scatter on the ground, Jax wanted it to swallow him up. He watched Piney pick up one of the photos that had landed near his feet. He watched his expression turn from shock to anger when he realised what he was looking and if he was still in disbelief the piece of paper that he was now picking up was sure to tell him the truth.

Piney looked up from the picture that could only be of Nicole, sure her hair was shorter and lighter but there was no denying it was her and when he looked up at a guilty looking Jax he felt his anger grow even more.

"What is this?"

"It nothing." Jax snapped as he started picking up the remaining pictures from the floor.

"Nothing?" Piney took a dominant step towards Jax who straightened up when he realised that Piney was now in front of him. "This is because of the drugs. The reason your not already half way to LA is because of this deal isn't it? ISN'T IT?" His voice raising as the anger became too much to control, not that he was even sure he wanted to control it.

If Jax was keeping Nicole away from Charming because of this deal then Piney realised that what the young VP had just sprouted off in church was a load of bull. He didn't believe this deal was any good for the Club any more than Piney did. So why?

"Is Clay holding this over her head?" Piney shook the piece of paper at Jax.

This was the last thing Jax wanted or needed. He knew that if this got out about Nicole he would have no other choice but to get her, his brothers wouldn't allow it, wouldn't allow him to leave her in LA especially without telling her that he was at least alive. And he wouldn't blame them she did have a right to know, the only reason she ran from her family was because she thought he was dead.

But Jax couldn't let that happen just yet. So he snatched the piece of paper and the photo from Piney. He had to shut this down before Piney got carried away.

"NO. Piney this is MY decision. I don't want her here." Jax didn't even believe his words so he wasn't surprised to see Piney smirk at him as he shook his head in disbelief.

"If Clay is holding something over you son, you need to tell the rest of the guys, they.." Jax let out a frustrated growl his hand running over his face.

"Clay isn't DOING ANYTHING."

"She should be here this is her home. She thinks your dead, you just gonna let her keep believing that?" Jax felt the guilt pang in his chest, Piney spoke the truth. She should be here but right now that wasn't possible.

"We're done here." Piney shook his head again this was not the boy he knew, respected.

"Fine." Piney headed for the door knowing that this conversation wasn't going anywhere.

"PINEY." His head turned over his shoulder as Jax angrily called out his name. "This." Jax raised the pictures. "Doesn't leave this room. As your VP I'm telling you to keep this shit to yourself." Jax knew his tone was harsh but he needed to make sure this didn't get out.

"Sure thing VP." Piney's voice was laced in sarcasm. And as he walked through the door he made sure that he slammed it shut.

Sinking back down onto his bed Jax knew that things had just gone wrong. Piney was never going to support this deal both him and Clay already knew that from the start but now with him finding out about Nicole Jax knew he was going to fight this deal harder especially as he seemed to think that Clay was behind his decision to keep her away.

And knowing Piney he was not going to just sit back and watch this happen, and that worried Jax.

* * *

Unser came out when he heard the sound of an approaching vehicle. Upon walking outside he watched Gemma's Cadillac SUV pull up outside his trailer. He was surprised to see her she wasn't due with his weekly weed run for another couple of days, in fact he was expecting her later than that considering Clay and the rest of them had just gotten out. He tried not to reminded himself that he hadn't yet received a visit from his old friend, he wasn't surprised, a little upset, but not surprised.

But he could always count on the Queen of bikers. She had been keeping the visits to at least once a week some times more, and after his wife Della had left him he relied heavily on those visits of hers, they kept him sane kept him fighting against the stage four cancer that was trying it's hardest to put an end to his life.

"Hey Gemma, didn't expect to see you for a few mores days." He spoke as a smile graced his lips, his feet carrying him down the steps to his trailer. But as Gemma got closer, he registered the agitated look on her face and he realised that this wasn't a social call.

"We've got a poblem Wayne." _Yeap defiantly not a social visit. _He mused to himself as the both headed over to the hand carved wooded seats outside his trailer.

"Everything okay with Clay, Jax?"

"Yeah, it's not that. I think Tara knows about John."

"Ho...w..how is that possible?" Unser felt his own voice wavier, this shouldn't be happening because as far as he was concerned as well as everyone else involved this was a secret that was dead and buried along with the man.

"John had another Old Lady, in Belfast." Gemma heard the intake of breath from Unser, clearly shocked by what he had just heard. But Gemma didn't give him a chance to say anything else instead she continued. "Before he was killed he was writing her letters. Sharing all his secrets. And when we went to Belfast that bitch sent those letters home with Jax, but Tara must have got her hands on them before Jax did."

"You sure, surely there would have been some sort of backlash from this."

"I found a note, fell out of one of Abel's colouring books. It was from Maureen spouting some shit about Jax knowing the truth about his father. I searched the house top to bottom this morning found nothing."

"Maybe this is nothing.." Gemma shook her head.

"Don't do that, Clay tried to do the same this morning. I know this is bad Wayne, I can feel it. Nothing good is going to come from this." Unser could actually see her shaking slightly. She was rattled and he would do anything he could to help her.

"What do you want me to do?"

"There is only one other place that Tara would keep something that important, her office at St. Thomas."

"You asking be to break into her office?" Unser queried quickly catching on to what she was not so subtly getting at, he just hoped he was completely off the mark.

"We need those letters Wayne. She's goes on lunch at one everyday. Goes home."

"Gemma I don't kn..." Wayne stopped when Gemma's hand came to rest ontop of his hand. She gave him that look, the look that she always gave him, the look that he always gave into and ended up doing whatever it was that she asked of him. Now was no exception. "Okay...Okay..."

"Thankyou." Gemma rubbed her hand over the top of his before placing a kiss on the old mans cheek. She could always count on this man.

* * *

Heading up the charge, Roosevelt stepped out of the patrol car proceeding towards the Sons who had now emerged from the clubhouse.

After the four bodies had been found that morning, Roosevelt had received multiply interrigations not only from his boss, but he'd had an interesting conversation with none other than Linc Potter, a conversation where Linc insinuated that maybe the Sons were playing with the big boys now, reasoning that, that could be the only reason the Sons had gotten so bold as to drop four bodies of their known enemies, the ROC no less, right in their own backyard. He also had to suffer Jacob Hale who just happened to be the developer behind Charming Heights which is where the bodies had been found. Roosevelt still hadn't figured out if his concern was as major to this town or if his concern was for the amount of money he personally set to lose after this.

Either way Roosevelt knew he was right about one thing, they all were, the Sons needed to be dealt with shown that this type of behavior would not be accepted in Charming any longer.

"What the hell is this?" Clay asked looking over at the fire engine that was currently pulling into his lot.

"I have a couple of questions about your whereabouts last night." Roosevelt directed his question to Clay, who was standing at the front of the group of Sons that had quickly assembled behind him.

"You know we were at the reservation all night, because you were out front all night. Directing traffic, right?" Clay knew that wasn't the truth but he sure as hell didn't mind pissing the lieutenant off. "So again what is this?"

"I don't know, I kind of smell smoke, Don't you?"

Smirking Roosevelt led the fire officers into the clubhouse ignoring the menacing looks that were currently being thrown in his direction.

"You've made your point now it's time for you to get." Clay knew that nothing good was going to come from this little show Roosevelt was putting on.

"There's no brothers on your wall, what's up with that?" Roosevelt remarked as he looked at the mug shots hanging on the wall in front of him. He turned round to face Clay.

"What's up with that is there's no brothers on the wall." Piney commented with a smile on his thin lips.

"We've got no problem with colour." Clay added after seeing the corner of Roosevelt's lip twitch from Piney comment.

"As long as it stays out of Charming, right?" Clay shook his head this asshole really wasn't going to drop this.

* * *

Jax walked out of his dorm room after hearing a racket outside. Walking down the hallway he heard the noise getting louder, before the sound of glass shattering reached his ears. Breaking into a quick jog he made it to the bar just in time to see Roosevelt smashing the Chapel windows with an axe.

His mouth open in complete shock as to what he was witnessing he turend to look at Clay who looked as pissed off as he was starting to feel, in fact when he looked at Chibs, Tig, Bobby and Piney they all looked the same, but none of them were even making an attempt to stop him not that he could blame them the way Roosevelt was tearing strips out of the place the man was clearly on a mission to prove something, and Jax guessed probably just like his brothers had that nothing was going to stop his destruction.

* * *

Roosevelt finally passed the axe back to the fire Marshall, feeling that his point had been made, and judging by the look on the faces of the members of Samcro in front of him then they had heard it loud and clear and were not impressed.

But this show of force, power was needed, he was not Unser or even Hale and Samcro needed to know that. Well that was how Roosevelt justified what he had just done. Taking an axe and destroying their property was highly unprofessional, in fact his was bordering on breaking the law he tried so hard to upkeep.

* * *

Jax was pretty much speechless as he stood amongst the destruction. The clubhouse wasn't just a clubhouse it was his home and seeing it completely destroyed left a bitter taste in his mouth.

Everything was starting to change, the new direction the club was heading in to the new law enforcement that seemed to have no problems overstepping the lines in order to put a stop to Samcrro which frighteningly reminded him a little too much of Stahl.

And then there were the outside pressures. The promises he had made to Tara, his Fiancée the promise to get them out, to Nicole. The cousin he loved and vowed to protect, the cousin who he had now decided to leave in LA completely unprotected even with the knowledge that the Cartel knew exactly who she was, where she lived and what she meant to the club.

Yeah things were defiantly changing and he was starting to feel a little out of his depth.


	5. Chapter 5

First off I want to thank everyone who has added and reviewed my story it means a lot to me and I'm glad your all enjoying it so far. I know I only updated dated yesterday but I'm going away for the bank holiday weekend so instead of leaving you all hanging I thought I would upload this chapter today. I hope you enjoy it and I'll apoligise now for the little cliffhanger...Sorry xx

Everything Changes

Chapter Five

_She watched him fall to his knees. He was trying to stay strong she could tell, but he couldn't hide the glint of fear lingering in his eyes. Fear from knowing that in a few short moments he would breathe his last breath. _

_She tried to get to him, protect him from what was about to happen but she couldn't move and as she screamed out to him, he didn't even react it was like he couldn't hear her. She looked around and saw her Uncle standing with his arms folded across his chest as he to watched the distressing scene before him. She screamed at him to make this all stop, that Jax didn't mean it and that he couldn't do this but again her cries went unheard. _

_Unable to move and unable to be heard she just watched on. Tears streamed down her face, as the dark shadow crept towards him. __Her body shook as the tanned hand forcefully grabbed a fist full of his blonde hair as he forced his head back, exposing his neck._

_The glint of the blade shone in her eyes. Then everything went black._

_Everything went deadly silent. She couldn't hear the pounding of her heart beating rapidly, nor could she hear anything around her. She was scared._

_But after a few short moments of eerie silence she heard something._

_It took only a second for her to realise what it was she was hearing and she felt sick. Jax was chocking, struggling for breath. She could hear the sickening sound of the blade slicing into his skin and the irony smell of blood hit her nose. When everything came back to light she saw her cousin lying on the floor in a pool of his own blood. His body limp.__  
_

_She started wailing uncontrollably. Tears pooling around her as she to dropped to the floor. She closed her eyes unable to look at the lifeless body of her cousin any longer._

_Eventually her eyes fluttered open but instead of seeing the image of Jax on the floor she found herself staring into a pair of demon like eyes. His Killer eyes._

Nicole shot up in bed, her heart pounding in her chest. Scraping her light brown hair off her now sweaty face she looked over her shoulder to the semi naked body next to her, thanking whoever was above that her nightmare had not woken him. Throwing back the black silk sheets she tiptoed to the door grabbing her robe off the back and headed downstairs to the kitchen.

Bring the glass of water to her lips, trying her best not to spill any as her hands were still shaking, she took a large sip enjoying the coolness of water.

This wasn't the first time she's had a nightmare about Jax, about the retaliation he would have suffered for the deal he had made with Stahl, but recently her nightmares had gotten worse. And not only had she been plagued about nightmares of Jax she had also been dreaming about the day she had left Charming where she had stupidly run to Darby and basically begged him to kill her. Nicole shook her head that defiantly hadn't been one of her shining moments and then again neither were the four months that followed.

It had taken her to hit rock bottom before she finalised what she was doing was wrong. But as soon as she realised that she did everything she could to dig herself out of the hole she had created for herself. And since that day she hadn't looked back. Apart from when she closed her eyes and the nightmares came back to haunt her.

She would never forget Charming or her family. But she couldn't go back there.

She wasn't angry about what had happened to Jax, she had grown up in the club knew the rules which meant she knew what happened to rats, as did Jax which meant he to always knew that his death could be a possibility when the club found out.

If it was anyone else of course she would have been upset, they were family but she knew she would have gotten through it accepted it but it wasn't anyone else it was Jax and she couldn't accept that. And after seeing Kozik a few months back it made her realise how much that was true.

She had completely freaked when she saw him, her whole body shook and when she felt herself struggling for breath she did what she always did, she ran. Seeing him was a nasty reminder of what she had lost.

But him, that life it was her past, this was her life now, here in LA with Liam, her Fiancé.

She had met him by complete accident, actually ran into him at rehab. She was there for her final check in with her sponsor and he was there visiting a friend.

Liam was good looking, successful, kind and most importantly he was the farthest thing away from home and from her past loves.

She was happy, but she knew it couldn't last forever. Not only was their relationship founded on lies, all hers, but in two weeks her family was going to be out, and the perfect little world she had created for herself could and would soon be over.

She had been on pins for a month after seeing Kozik, she was just waiting for the day that he would come knocking on her door to drag her back to Charming, but he never came.

She had been careful. She never used her last name on anything official, she'd cut her hair and changed the colour, and made sure she stayed beneath the radar,even though deep down that none of that would make a difference. Juice would find her. Although he may say and do stupid things sometimes, he was far from that especially when it came to computers.

Once he was realised and got the proper equipment and got down to business she knew it wouldn't take long for him to locate her. And that terrified her.

She had only seen Kozik for a few moments and she had freaked out, she dread to think how she was going to react if Clay turned up on her doorstep.

Taking another sip of water and realising that it wasn't what she needed she went over to the fridge and pulled out the bottle of Vodka that was in tucked away in the freezer compartment.

A couple of large glasses later Nicole returned to her bedroom, where Liam was still sound asleep. She pulled back the the silk sheets and slipped in beside him. Staring at him she wondered how he would cope when her secrets were uncovered.

_Would he stay?_

Two weeks Later

Staring at her reflection in mirror Nicole quickly realised why Liam had told her to stay at home because she looked like shit. Her nightmares hadn't eased in fact they had gotten worse if anything. Nicole couldn't honestly remember the last time she had slept straight through the night.

"Sweets just go back to bed." Liam spoke from behind her as his hands rested on her tiny waist which had shrunk in the past few weeks thanks to the haunting nightmares she could seem to shake.

"Seriously I'm fine." _Another lie._

"Sweets." The use of his pet name for her made her smile a little more genuine. He was such a good guy and she was finding it hard to keep lying to him. It didn't help that she was mentally and physically exhausted.

Turning her round in his arms so that he was facing her, Liam placed a soft kiss upon on her lips before resting his forehead against hers. His one hand now cupping her face as he rubbed his thumb over her pale cheek. Nicole knew he meant well and was trying to comfort her but nothing he could say could manage that. And lately the feel of his hands were just wrong.

They had been released days ago and Nicole knew deep inside that it was only a matter of time before they showed up.

And it was on the day of there release that her nightmares started taking a different turn. No longer did she dream about Happy killing Jax she dreamt about him pushing her down on the Redwood table as his hand trailed up her skin, dreamt about his lips biting and kissing her body all over. She had no idea why she started dreaming about him in that way but it made her feel sick and guilty. Especially guilty not just because she felt like it was a betrayal to Jax's memory, but because right now those dreams had her pulling away from Liam's touch.

"I said I'm fine." Her words were harsh she knew it and she felt like a total bitch.

Liam watched Nicole walk away from him, it was a sight he was getting used to. He never meant to fall madly in love with the girl but he had and not matter what he wouldn't change it for the world. Which is why he hated seeing her like this. Obviously she had something on her mind something that was keeping her awake at nights. She thought he didn't know about it but he did, he had woken up more than once to find an empty space beside him. He had thought about going to find her but one thing he had learnt about Nicole was that she was a private person, so he knew that she wouldn't appreciate his prying even if he was her Fiance. Plus he did get to comfort her, kind of.

Sometimes when he had woken up to find her side of the bed empty he found that he couldn't get back to sleep no matter how hard he tried. So he waited for her sometimes it could be hours later but he really didn't care he just stayed awake till he heard the creek of their bedroom door. Then he would close his eyes, pretend to be asleep and went for her to climb into bed and snuggle against him, holding him tightly. Sometimes he could feel her wet cheeks on his arm or chest and he pulled her closer, his eyes still closed.

But the last couple times that had stopped. When she returned to their bed she didn't come to him instead she lay beside him with her back facing him. And that killed him. He didn't want to lose her she was amazing and he had completely fallen head over heels in love with her.

Walking from the en-suite he found Nicole pulling some clothes from her walk-in closest. He shook his head. She was a mess. She looked tired and he hadn't seen her eat anything more than a chocolate bar here and there for the past two weeks. What she needed whether she agreed or not was rest.

"Hey." Nicole looked over her shoulder as she zipped up her black pencil skirt. "Just take a couple of days. You need it." Liam walked over to her but Nicole just shook her head and pulled off her tank top and started pulling on her black lacy bra.

"I can't we've got to much going on. We have that 30th birthday dinner this afternoon."

"I can handle that."

"No I made the booking Mrs Henderson will be expecting me there." That was it for Liam he'd had enough. Taking a hold of her arm as she reached for her shirt Liam pulled her in front of him, his free hand coming to rest on the nape of her neck.

"I'm not taking no for an answer sweets. As your boss I'm telling you to take the damn day off okay. Okay?" He dipped his head so he could catch her eyes and when she finally looked at him she nodded her head in defeat. _Finally._

He brushed his lips against hers lightly before pulling back, both hands now cupping her face. "I love you."

He waited hoping she would say it back, but she didn't and he wasn't surprised. She had only ever told him that she loved him a few of times before but never had she said it when they were staring deep into one another's eyes. He knew she felt it but it he wished she would say it more often.

"Me too." He tried to not show that he was bothered by not hearing those three words, instead he let his hands slide from her face down her body to her hips and pulled her closer so there was no space between them. He kissed her again but as he tried to deepen it she pulled away.

"Thankyou."

"What for?"

"Being so nice to me. I know that I've be bit distant lately."

"You know you can talk to me right. About anything." He thought he'd give a try at least it would be out there. At least she would know that he was there for her. She nodded again but this time he was sure he caught the sight of tears filling her eyes.

"I'll make us something special for dinner tonight." She offered as a guilty plea.

"You don't have to. All I care about is you. And you need some rest sweets."

"I will, but I want to do this for you apologise for my behavior lately."

"You have nothing to be sorry about." _Yes I do. _Nicole thought she had been having sex dreams about another man, but not just any man, she was dreaming about a killer. She had a lot to apologise for. Pushing past the fact that his hand and lips weren't Happy's, Nicole wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer so that she could kiss him again, this time allowing Liam to deepen it.

* * *

Nicole got herself dressed in a pair in a pair of grey sweatpants and a simple white tank top and made her way downstairs to the kitchen to start preparing the special dinner for Liam. He deserved that much.

Three hours later and her dinner of Roast beef with rosemary potatoes, green beans, carrots, shallots and home-made red wine gravy was going well and was right on schedule.

She had sent Liam a text telling him to be home by 7.30, she knew that the Henderson party would be over by then. He had sent a text right back asking if she had done as her told. It made her smile. She text back and told him that she had actually managed to get 3 hours of shut eye and felt loads better. This time she wasn't lying to him.

* * *

Doing a quick spin in front of the mirror giving herself a quick once over she had to admit she was happy with what she saw, it was a long way from the mess she was this morning. She was dressed in a figure hugging cream dress, her now light golden brown hair which she still couldn't get used to fell just past her shoulders in soft curls and her makeup perfectly covered the dark circles under her eyes.

Placing on some gold bangles and drop gold earnings she heard a knocking echo throughout the four bedroom two story house.

Turning down the music of her IPod Nicole was met with silence. Waiting a moment or two and hearing nothing she shrugged it off thinking she must have clearly been hearing things but as she went to turn the music back up she heard the knocking again.

Her body started to shake and Nicole debated on what she should do because she knew this was it, they had found her. She knew this would happen so she could either cower upstairs in her bedroom in hope that they would go away or she could finally get this over and done with, face her past demons and tell them exactly where they could go.


	6. Chapter 6

Everything Changes

Chapter Six

Piney pulled up outside the two storey house, stretching his sore aching muscles as he dismounted his bike. It had been a long time since he had ridden for six hours straight but he'd had no other choice.

The club was heading down a very dangerous path.

When he helped form the club now known as Son Of Anarchy the idea had been to create a community, a family of some sort where friends could enjoy and share their love of the open road. It had never been created with the intention of becoming outlaws. But over the years that changed. And Piney was no foul and neither was JT. The steps that first led SOA into law breaking was the town the lived in, Charming. They made sure they kept the quaint town safe from Drugs, violence and major corporations that threatened to ruin all that Charming was which was...Charming.

Over the years the club expanded and so did the depths of Samcro's illegal dabbling's. Gun running and violence were now what they were known for. But one thing never changed they still protected Charming at all costs. And the new illegal activities became a nesscary evil to keep the people and the town they loved protected.

But drugs. Piney couldn't accept that, it was a dirty game and it was the game they had fought hard to keep out of Charming. Drugs were not JT's vision and it was disrespectful to his memory. And so was Clay trying to convince the club that this deal was good for them. It wasn't. Clay was doing this for the money it was obvious- to Piney anyway- that Clay was doing this for himself he didn't care about anyone because he didn't have long left at the gavel. In someways because he had known Clay for so long he understood his brothers greed but Jax...he couldn't understand.

Which is why he had followed Jax to his dorm room where he disappeared to after the mulling was brought to the table. He hoped that Jax would tell him that he had a plan that he wasn't really behind this deal that he would not let this happen but that never happened instead Piney was left with more questions and uncertainty about the whole situation.

Looking at the photo that Jax had clearly tried to hide from him when he stormed into his room he was shocked to see Nicole. The whole club had been looking for and Piney was happy that it seemed Jax had done what they couldn't and that he was finally going to bring her home but that wasn't the case. Instead Jax stood in front of him an told him that she was staying where she was that he didn't want her around.

And that was when he realised that this whole thing was wrong. Clearly Jax wasn't thinking straight, he was not only backing Clay, but bailing on his cousin as well. And that was dangerous for everyone. And Piney could only think of one solution to this whole mess.

* * *

Nicole could see the tall shadow looming behind the frosted glass in the front door. Her whole body shook but instead of turning her back on the towering shadow and running away to hide, Nicole took a deep breath and took the remaining steps that stood between her and her past.

_You can do this, you need to do this, just get it over with._

Nicole's shaky hand reached out towards the doorknob and with one finally intake of breath she opened the door.

"Hey Sweetheart." Nicole tried to speak but she couldn't find the words. Of course she knew it was a Son waiting for her on the other side of the door, but Piney was the last one she thought she'd see standing in front of her. "You gonna let an old man in or what.."

Momentarily stunned by his appearance and still unable to speak, Nicole opened the door further and stepped aside allowing him in.

* * *

Standing in the middle of the oversized room Piney looked around the room was packed with oversized sofas and chairs, and a massive flat screen TV. Everything was so extravagant and it was clear that no expense had been spared which screamed snobbery to Piney and that wasn't his taste and he didn't remember it being hers either.

Continuing to look around Piney eyes were drawn to the pictures sitting upon the huge fire place, or rather one picture in-particular.

Taking hold of the wooden frame Piney stared at the picture inside. It was of Nicole and Jax by the looks it had been taken at one of Gemma's family dinners. Nicole couldn't have been any older than 12-13 making Jax around 18. They looked happy, both had big smiles on their faces like they hadn't got a care in the world. _Happier times._

* * *

Her hands continued to shake and no matter how many deep breaths she took she couldn't seem to stop them shaking or the rest of her body for that matter. She couldn't believe that it was Piney on her doorstep. She had envisioned this moment so many times lately but no once had Piney been the one who was trying to drag her back to Charming. His appearance raised many alarm bells and questions in her head but she reminded herself that none of them mattered. Nothing she had to ask and nothing he had to say would change the fact that she wasn't going anywhere.

She poured two glasses of the Patron Silver as carefully as she could. Once they were poured she downed one of the drinks. She figured she'd need a shot of dutch courage before she went toe to toe with the old man. And when she walked in the living space to find him staring at the picture of herself and Jax-the picture she had shed many tears over-she was glad she had taken the extra shot.

"Here." Placing the photo back on the mantel Piney turned to face Nicole who was extending a glass of clear liquid towards him. A first he thought it was vodka but one sniff told him differently.

"Patron." She nodded in response before taking a sip from her own glass. She was nervous he could tell, she was fiddling with the ring that was attached to her necklace, her mothers wedding ring. _Somethings never change. _He mused before her delicate almost wavering voice interrupted his thoughts.

"Why are you here?..."

"You look good." Piney remarked. Ignoring his compliment Nicole continued to ask her question. She just wanted this over sooner rather later. Not just because she didn't think that she could handle any of this much longer but because Liam was due home soon and she didn't think she would be able to explain the old biker in their house.

"Why are you here?"

"You have to come home." Her eyes went wide and he could see the flair of anger behind them. But then again he didn't expect anything else because to her Jax was still dead. Maybe he should have started with that.

"This is my home now Piney." She stated firmly before taking another slightly larger sip of her drink.

"Right." He took a sip of his own drink and Nicole noticed his eyes scan the room. She knew what he was thinking, Sons weren't exactly knowing for their extravagance and that was exactly what Liam was all about and it was clearly reflected within his house. He clearly thought that she was staying for that.

"So?" She coaxed trying to move this conversation along. Piney returned his eyes back to Nicole who had once again taken to fiddling with her necklace.

"He needs you sweetheart." That was it for Nicole, she'd had enough. Of course she still loved Clay, her family but she couldn't accept what they had done to Jax and she really couldn't believe that they expected her to.

"I don't care if Clay needs me Piney I can't..."

"I'm not talking about Clay." Piney bellowed cutting her dead. He watched her jump at his raised voice but seeing her fear didn't stop him from approaching her. "Jax needs you sweetheart." She froze and let out a ragged breath. She tried to open her mouth to say something, anything to him but nothing came out. "He's alive Sweetheart."

Her eyes darted all over Piney to see if this was some sort of joke but Piney looked deadly serious. He edged closer to her again but she stepped backwards till her calves hit the big grey sofa behind her, and she dropped down into the cushions when her legs gave way. Placing the glass on the floor before she dropped it she rested her elbows on he knees and buried her head in her hands as she tried to fathom what she had just heard and what the hell was going on.

Her mind started going over every little thing that had happened in the run up to that day when most of Samcro was arrested. She went over every detail and things started to fall into place. Her conversation with Jax _"No matter what happens today don't leave, don't run away." _Jax knew all along what was going to happen that day and that was why he had tried to warn her. It was all a set up. he knew she would be devastated and would run.

And then there was the way Happy had tried to get to her, she would never know what it was he would have said to her if she had allowed him to get close but she would bet her life that he would have told her something that stop her from running.

She inhaled a trembling breath, she had been so stupid, she should have stayed with her family instead of running away like a pathetic little coward. If she had stayed everything would have been different, she would never had made all those mistakes that almost led to her own death. She felt sick.

"Nicole."

Piney went to her. He hadn't expected her to react like this, he didn't exactly no what he had been expecting but this wasn't it. Her head was buried in her hand and her body shook harder than before. He knew it was a shock but she should be excited happy instead all he was getting was fear and sadness. That worried him. Placing his drink on the black glass coffee table he shifted towards her, his hand coming to rest on her shoulder.

"Sweetheart he's okay." He rubbed his hand over her shoulder in an attempt to try and comfort her, but removed it when her head shot up from her hands and focused on him. Her eyes were glazed, all color gone from her face and Piney knew she was fighting to keep control. This was defiantly not what Piney had been expecting and neither were her next words.

"Beef."

"What?" Piney asked with a smile.

"I need to check on the Beef." Nicole jumped to her feet before practically running out of the room.

Not missing a beat even for an old man, Piney followed her. When he entered the massive kitchen which he had to say smelled pretty damn good, Nicole was pulling a joint of what he presumed was beef, out of the oven although considering how much her hands were shaking he wasn't sure she was going to be able to manage it without spilling it over the floor.

"Here let me ge..."

"I've got it." She snapped slamming the tray of beef onto the counter. Piney noted the anger in her voice clearly she wasn't happy but a quick glance at the pompous oversized clock on the wall he realised he didn't exactly have time to pussy foot around her, he needed to say what he had ridden nearly 6 hours to say.

"You need to come home sweetheart. Jax he...he ain't making the right choices. He needs you. Your the only one who can get through to him."

Nicole, who was thankful that her back was to Piney, wiped a tear that had some how managed to escape. Of course she wanted to see Jax, wanted to see her whole family but she couldn't go home. She had fought to hard to scrape herself off the floor and she knew going back to Charming wasn't a good idea for her right now, no matter how much she wanted to see Jax.

"No." She knew her voice was barely audible and maybe it was intentional because she knew how Piney would react to her refusal.

"NO?" She felt a chill run down her spine as he voice echoed around the kitchen.

"No." She repeated as she basted the beef. Anything to try and occupy herself.

Piney thought he had completely misheard her at first, he had to have because the Nicole Teller he knew would never say no especially if her family, if Jax needed her. So that's why he was even more gob smacked when she actually repeated herself and said _No_ this time loud and clear so that there was no mishearing her.

"What the hell do you mean no?" He asked gruffly as he approached her again. Hearing his heavy footsteps on the marble floor Nicole turned to face him, his anger clear as day. "Jax is alive and he needs you."

"I'm glad he's alive I am Piney but I...I can't go back there. My life is here now, I have responsibilities."

"And what about your responsibilities to your family back home?" Nicole shook her head, she didn't want to hear this.

"I don't expect you to understand..."

"Oh I understand al'right." Piney huffed. "You're bailing on your family." Even though she watched him advance towards her again, she was still taken aback when he grabbed her left hand. The hand that was decorated with a 6 caret engagement ring. "You're bailing on your family for this..." While keeping a hold of her hand, even though she was trying to pull free, he used his other hand to motion around the kitchen. "For money."

"Pine..."

"Your family loved you.." He tightened his grip. "Protected you when you needed it and you can't even be bothered to do the same. Selfish that's what you are." He looked her up and down in disgust. "Selfish."

"Don't...Don't you dare." She snapped finally managing to pull her hand from his. "You have no idea what I've been through..."

"Yeah looks like you've really suffered." It was a harsh remark he knew that but he was just to damn angry to filter his comments towards her. He needed her to come back she was his one hope to putting a stop to all the madness back home but she was refusing and he hadn't anticipated that happening.

"You have no right, and if Jay needed me much so badly then where the fuck is he. Why are you here instead him Piney..hmm...what no answer for that one?" No he didn't have an answer because he couldn't exactly tell her that Jax was doing the exact same thing she was, abandoning family. "I think you should leave." She muttered after they came to a very uncomfortable silence.

"Yeah." Realising he had lost Piney turned his back on her and went to leave but suddenly stopped. Turning his head over his shoulder to look at her. "You know the Nicole Teller I used to know wouldn't let anything stand in her way when it came to protecting her family."

"Yeah well I'm not that girl anymore." Her voice was hoarse as the lump rose in her throat.

Piney blew out a breath. He hoped that wasn't true because he needed her, the club needed her, needed some of that old Nicole Teller charm and Jax needed that other voice on his shoulder, the voice of reason not the voice of Clay.

**Thanks for all the reviews and adds, I always love to know what you all think. R&R **


	7. Chapter 7

Everything Changes

Chapter Seven 

Kozik scowled as Happy's deep raspy tones interrupted his thoughts. He had come outside for a bit of peace and quiet, time to think as well as to catch a few rays but no, yet again Happy's mood was ruining that.

Clay had sent himself and Miles up to meet Happy's at his ma's house where she was kindly allowing the Sons to store their guns for a few days until the shipment to Romeo. Kozik hadn't exactly been happy about being sent on this job because he still hadn't had a chance to speak to Jax and the longer he was leaving it...well lets just say he knew Jax's reaction would be worse. So he was already in a pissed off state and listening to Happy bitch-which he had constantly been doing since he and Miles had got there- was fucking frustrating and annoying especially as it had become the norm for Happy lately. And according to Tig he was the same on the inside.

Knowing that his peace was well and truly ruined Koizk pushed himself up from the deck chair, grabbing his shirt off the back and walked over to Happy who was sitting on the steps to his Ma's house, his hand running over his bald head.

"What did he do this time?" Kozik asked as he pulled his shirt over his head.

"Left his shit everywhere. Dick thought my Ma would clear that shit up. Prick." Kozik smirked as he snaked out his pack of smokes from the pocket of his jeans, offering one to Happy as he joined him on the steps.

Kozik watched Happy out of the corner of his eye. The man was wound tight, of course Happy was always wound a little tight but this was different, and Kozik wondered if it had anything to do with a certain dark haired little beaut that disappeared 14 months ago.

But Kozik wasn't about to try and have that conversation with the Tacoma killer, it would be like trying to get blood out of a stone, a stone that could easy slit your throat or cause you server bodily harm if he'd felt like you crossed the line with him and bringing up Nicole would defiantly be crossing the line. So the two of them just continued to sit smoking their cigarette in silence, well until a smashing sound came from inside the house quickly followed by a barrage of curses from Miles.

"Fuck." Happy growled before throwing his cigarette to the ground, storming inside. One thing Kozik did know was he really didn't want to be Miles right now.

Winching at the sound of Happy putting Miles in his place yet again, Kozik decided that he would go back to his chair and try for like the hundredth time to get a little bit of shut eye. But as he made his way over he watched a basketball bounce over the fence followed by two black kids peering over the fence

"Yo you wanna toss me that rock?" Picking up the ball Kozik threw it back at them where the second kid catches it. About to settle in his chair he stopped when the second kid holding the ball asked him something.

"Hey you ball?"

"Not today man." Kozik remarked as he took a seat in the deck chair. Getting angrier that it was becoming almost impossible to get some fucking peace around here.

"What's the matter surfer dude scared of a little hood ball." The first kid mocked. Kozik was pissed one thing he hated being reffered to was a surfer dude, their a bunch of washed-up, stoned, slackers who have nothing better to do in their pathetic little lives than to catch a few waves, that was not him. He was about to take a pop at the little shits when the first kid started talking again. "Come on 10 bucks a point."

"Shut up bitch. You aint got no money." The second kid whined to the first.

"Bullshit." Kozik watched as the first kid pulled a roll of cash from his pocket. Now Kozik was intrigued. What better way to smack these kids down than beat them at their own game while taking all their money. Sweet.

"How much you got?" Kozik asked double checking that it would be worth it.

"Like 300 hundred n somethin'." The smile spread across Kozik's face. _This is gonna be fun, beat their ass and relieve a little tension. _He mused as he got back to his feet.

"Al'right you and me La Brown. One on One winner takes."

* * *

"Jax..."

"Hmm..." Jax was drawn from his thoughts when a large hand clamped down on his shoulder. He looked up to see Clay looking at him with concern.

"You with me son?"

"Yeah.." That was a lie.

Jax had barely heard a word Clay had said all morning because he couldn't stop thinking about yesterday. About being handed the information on Nicole, reading the contents, Piney finding the contents and giving him what for, then the old man pulling his little disappearing act- Jax just hoped Piney had disappeared to the cabin like usual and not LA. Then there was the deal, not only the deal that Clay had made with the Cartel behind the Clubs back but the deal Jax himself had made with Clay about getting out, getting his family as far out of Charming as he could.

Jax had always been a straight up kind of guy never one for being sneaky unless it was for the good of the Club but even then he never lied to his brothers about it in fact, they were always in on it but this was different. He was being sneaky, lying to them and keeping them in the dark, and that wasn't sitting well with him.

None of it was.

So having a conversation with Clay about how to get people on their side, getting them to back this deal which Jax knew was not good for the club but was blinded by his own personal gain, was the last thing he wanted to be doing, especially as he was starting to feel a little guilty.

"We have Piney, Bobby and Juice opposed. Where we at with the rest?" Clay continued ignoring his gut that was screaming at him that Jax wasn't comfortable having this conversation right now, because he didn't have time for that. They had to get the guns from Happy's Mom's house today, get in the vote in and then deliver the guns and hopefully the coke to the Cartel tomorrow. That was what was important not his stepsons doubt or guilt.

"Chibs knows we need this to fill our Irish commitment. He'll go our way." Jax told him as he finally started participating in the conversation.

"So will Tig which makes four. Happy. Kozik?"

"Kozik's an ex junkie I'm thinking he's a no. And Hap well..."

"What's the deal with you two?" Jax looked up from his cup of strong black coffee at Clay. He wondered if and when this shit was going to get brought up.

They still had one another's back but there had been a defiant shift in their relationship as brothers.

Jax had been pissed that Happy had walked out the day of their arrest with Nicole's hand in his because he had told Happy to end that shit but he had totally ignored that and then had the fucking balls to flaunt it in his face.

Happy had been pissed that Nicole had been used in the deal with the Russians and Jax knew from the argument they'd had inside that he blamed him for Nicole running. Reciting his words from months ago when Jax had asked him to help with the whole Ryan thing _Lies cause shit. _

They were at a stale mate. Neither one willing to budge at first but as time passed their views started to change. Jax's more than Happy's. Jax saw a different side to Happy every time they received news or rather no news on Nicole's whereabouts. It was nothing obvious but Jax noticed how he always went more quiet-if that was possible-and would either hit the self made gym in the yard or hit some poor fucks face. The others didn't really notice it but after their argument Jax did and that was when he first started thinking that maybe his quick judgment on the thing with him and Nicole was wrong and that Happy wasn't just using her, picking her up whenever he felt like it and dumping her, it was something more. And now all he could think about was what Happy would do if he found out the he had Nicole's address sitting in the bottom draw of his nightstand in his dorm room.

Jax scoffed, this was just another reason for him to feel guilty.

"So..." Clay tried to coax and answer out of him.

"Hap will probably side with Tig. Ope's leaning our way which means if he sides with us so will Miles. That will give us our majority." Jax took another swig of his coffee well aware that he hadn't answered Clay's question properly. And by the look of his Clay's face he was well aware that Jax had dodged the question to. "You need to work on Bobby, stop him from spreading doubt at least."

"Yeah. I have to head to the Wahewa, I'll take Bobby with me, have a little heart to heart." Jax didn't miss the edge to Clay's tone at the last part, but decided to ignore, they had a lot to do today.

"Good. I'll head up Oswald's check in on the construction." Clay nodded. "How did you manage to get Oswald to sign off on us using his old warehouse for the gun construction, especially since we dumped four Russians in his new money maker?"

"I can be persuasive when I need to be."

"Yeah." Again he scoffed this time trying to hide it, as well as the roll of his eyes by taking another swig of his coffee.

"So I'll see you tonight I guess when we vote this shit."

"Yeah."

The room fell silent. Both of them had a lot resting on this deal, and all it needed was for one person to vote the wrong way and it could all be over for both of them.

* * *

Roosevelt sat impatiently at his desk. A little over and hour and a half ago he had been sat in Linc Potters _war room_ and had been witness to a very interesting and deeply important information that could finally see Charming rid of the Sons Of Anarchy once and for all. Eli Roosevelt couldn't have been happier.

Linc had assigned him a job, a very important job that he was more than willing to accept in fact he jumped at the chance.

And the reason he was waiting impatiently was because 30 minutes ago he had sent two officer's to bring in the man who could be the answer to not only his prayers but Linc's to.

He heard irate shouts of the man in question echo down the hall just outside his office. _Finally_. Getting to his feet he opened the door to his office just as the officers arrived outside it.

"Gentlemen." He opened the door further, taking a step back and allowing them to enter. "Thankyou." The two officers nod and then exit the room. Closing the door behind them Roosevelt came to stand next to Juan Carlos Ortiz aka Juice- he motioned for him to take seat and was surprised when he did, he expected more of a fight.

"What's this bullshit all about. I have a card for that weed." _Ah there's the fight_ Roosevelt thought as a smirk appeared on his lips, a smirk he didn't even try to hide as he leant against his desk so he was facing Juice.

"I don't give a shit about the weed man." This time it was Juice's turn to smirk. Suddenly he realised where this was going.

"So why'd you pick me up?" He asked feigning ignorance.

Knowing that they were finally on the same page Roosevelt decided that now was the right time to strike. Turning slightly he picked up the picture frame that was sat on his desk. Taking the picture he showed it to Juice.

"This is me and my Dad fishing at Rockaway Beach. You grew up in Queens right?" Juice didn't even need to take a closer look at the picture to know that Roosevelt was spouting bullshit. He was up to something and Juice wasn't about to sit there and play dumb, even if he could pull it off pretty well.

"No one fished at Rockaway, not unless you wanted to fry up beer bottles and syringes. That ain't Queens. What's this about man?"

"You ever see your father?" He asked placing the picture back on his desk. "I can arrange that." Roosevelt watched as Juice stilled. Roosevelt wasn't overly fond on using this sort of conduct in his job, but just like at the Clubhouse this was necessary. Leaning back further across his desk he retrieved the folder Linc had given him earlier. "Michael Howard Cole." The name rolled off his tongue as he folded the folder in half dangling the picture in front of a now agitated looking Juice. "Juan Carlos this is your Daddy."

Suddenly it was all to clear to Juice what was going on. First he thought this was a routine throwing his dick around trying to show him who was boss routine and maybe ask him a few questions about his club hoping that he would break which of course he wouldn't.

But that wasn't what was happening.

Juice always knew the true identity of his father, he had walked out on him, his mother and his little sister when he was 8. So Juice was well aware of who and what his father was.

He had never kept it a secret, he wasn't ashamed, he wasn't the coward who had walked out on his responsibilities. It wasn't until he first started hanging around the club did he start to hide his fathers true identity. Again it wasn't out of embarrassment but out of choice.

The club had offered him something that Juice had long forgotten, they offered him a family a home and for that he was grateful. So he had to keep the secret of who his father was, but in all honestly his father hadn't been part of his life for...well he just wasn't apart of it and Juice preferred it that way, so cutting his father completely out of his life, acting like he didn't exist was easy because really he had never been there anyway.

But now he found himself staring at a photo of the man that had abandoned his family. And unfortunately he knew exactly where Roosevelt was going with this.

"I don't know if you can tell by this picture but he's um..he's black." He wasn't surprised that Juice was still silent. "Like very black." He added rubbing salt in the wound.

"Yeah." Juice finally managed to croak out, his moth having suddenly gone dry.

"What do you think the club would do if they found out you were black." Juice tried to answer but he couldn't. He knew all to well what the club would to him, it was a rule and if you were to break that rule or any of the other rules you had agreed upon when you first signed up as a Prospect then there was only one type of punishment and it was one that Juice really didn't want to experience. "Well let me explain it to you. First they will strip you of your patch, then they will..."

"You know dick about my Club." Juice interrupted. He really didn't need to hear the gory details especially from outsider, a pig of all people.

"You really believe that?" Roosevelt shook his head.

"We done?" Juice asked already on his feet.

"Yeah we're done." Juice headed for the door only stopping when Roosevelt made another comment. He didn't bother to turn and look at him. "I'll be in touch brother." Juice stomach turned. He knew the reference Roosevelt was using _brother_ in and it made him sick.

Hearing the click of the door behind him Juice took a moment._ I'm fucked._

* * *

_I'm fucked. _That was Kozik's original thought when those shit head punks knocked him on the head stole his keys and took the truck that was full with the guns for the deal with Romeo.

And when Jax showed up along with Opie and Tig Kozik realised how much he'd really fucked up.

Jax flew at him in a rage, and even though Kozik couldn't blame him it didn't mean he just stood there and took, he reacted. Another mistake.

This, his stupid mistake had just made everything more difficult for Kozik, this situation put the two men at odds with one another and considering the information Kozik still had to tell Jax about Nicole he really didn't need him to be pissed at him already when he told him.

Thankfully they had managed to get the guns back, but Kozik knew Jax's mood towards him hadn't changed he was still pissed.

Sitting around the Redwood table waiting for the rest of his brothers to join him he knew exactly what to do to help mend the rift between him and VP.

* * *

Piney hadn't been able to stop thinking about what had gone down between himself and Nicole.

He had regretted the way he had spoken to her as soon as he started the engine on his bike. He had just dropped a major bombshell on her and what did he do, shout at her calling her selfish. He really shouldn't have done that but he was desperate.

This vote could change everything, change Samcro forever and he seemed to be the only one who realised that. So it was up to him to put a stop to Clay and Jax.

Nicole may have said no, but there was still one more option. Gemma.

She was the Queen to Clay's King and probably the only one left who could do something about this.

That's why he had arrived early for the vote. He needed to talk to her before they went to the table. Placing his helmet on the handlebar of his bike he made his way to the garage office where Gemma was.

She looked up from the paperwork she was working on when he entered.

"Your alive then." She observed as her eyes went back to her paperwork. Nobody had had heard from Piney for the past 24 hours, Opie had even headed up to the cabin only to find it empty. Gemma had been worried, with everything that was going on with the letters she thought that maybe Tara had let something slip but he was back so that was a good sign but looking up from her paperwork again she realised that maybe everything wasn't okay, because Piney looked like he had a whole lot of something he wanted to say.

Sliding off her glasses and placing them on her desk she leant back in her chair, her fingers interlinking as they came to rest on her lap. She tried to keep emotion free from her face she wasn't going to give anything away especially if this had nothing to do with those damn letters.

"You okay?"

"Was hoping you could tell me." _Shit. _Gemma swallowed the lump that had risen in her throat. "Clay?" _Double shit. _Again unwilling to give anything away Gemma played dumb.

"What about Clay?"

"This new deal your husband has set up..." Finally relieved that this was not about the letters, Gemma was now intrigued.

"The one with the Mayans friends' the guns?"

"It's not just guns Gem." Piney took a seat in the available chair in front of the desk. "Drugs."

"Dealing?"

"Just running, but that's bad enough." Gemma couldn't agree more. Dugs were not what Samcro did. "Talk some sense into him Gemma." Piney pleaded as he got to his feet.

"Oh I will." Gemma spat mirroring his action and getting to her feet. However both of their attention was drawn outise where Clay was pulling in followed closely by Bobby.

"We're just about to vote on this." She looked at him with a _what the fuck _face. Talk about leaving it till the last minute.

"I'll handle this." Even though she only had minutes to change her husbands mind it was worth a go.

* * *

Clay shook his head in anger, that Old cantankerous bastard had gone after his wife in a pitiful attempt to try and stop what was about happen, and by the scowl on his wife's face she had listened.

Clay was really not in the mood for this, after having spent the day listening to Bobby's feelings on the matter he'd heard enough and to be quite honest he didn't think his ego could take much more of a beating.

Although as the two stepped out of the office and Gemma made a bee line for him Clay didn't think he had much of a choice.

* * *

Bobby watched from a couple of bikes down, Piney coming to stand beside him. Neither one uttering a word as they watched intensively as Gemma stormed over to Clay.

The words whatever they were, were clearly spoken in anger, especially from Gemma, Clay's spoken more in frustration.

Piney and Bobby exchanged a concerned look but as their eyes returned to the couple Gemma was pinned against the railings Clay's hand inching to her throat his finger shoved in her face.

"He's gone." Bobby muttered not taking his eyes off the scene before him.

Piney couldn't agree more. Clearly Clay was so far gone that not even Gemma could reach him. He turned away leaving Bobby standing alone as he entered the Clubhouse, heading to his seat in the Chapel where he was about to partake in a vote that would destroy the club he loved, the club he had helped build. He really couldn't believe this was about to happen.

* * *

Every pair of eyes were was on him, he didn't need to look up to know that because he could feel them burning into him.

This was a hard vote, he wasn't stupid enough to think otherwise but he just hoped that his brothers had thought about the benefits they would reap from the vote rather than the cons. He also hoped that Piney or even Bobby for that fact hadn't been spreading their poison amongst the rest of his brothers.

Because he needed this.

Grasping the gavel between his arthritis infected hands, he took a moment to look around the table, where he finally found his voice.

"We've all had long enough to think about this. Gettin' into business with the Gallindo Cartel. Yay or Nay." It wasn't the best speech he ever made but what was there left to say. It was all down to the vote now, Clay couldn't do anymore. So he hit the gavel and nodded at Tig who was first to start of the vote.

"Yay." Tig spoke almost instantly. Clay wanted this, so as his right hand man Tig would always side with him. Both Clay and Jax shift their eyes to Chibs.

"I don't trust em. No." Clay and Jax exchanged a look. Neither expected that.

Next was Opie and after the brief conversation he'd had with Jax just before the vote, where Jax had promised him that he believed this cartel deal was good for the club, Opie told him he had his vote.

"Yay." Jax gave a curt nod to his best friend before looking at Miles.

"Yay."

"Nay." Piney snapped, the disgust clear on his face. Neither Clay or Jax lingered on the old man because they already knew which way he would go.

"Nay." Juice kept his eyes glued to the table as he nervously picked at his nails. He knew Jax would expect him in some way, to vote yay, but Juice just couldn't do it he had a bad feeling about this deal, especially after his talk with Roosevelt.

"NO." Bobby spoke firmly.

"I'm sorry, I'm a no." Jax's jaw flexed as he stared at Happy. This was not expected and as he flicked his gaze to Clay, Jax knew he felt the same. _This was not going to go their way._

"Backing my Prez and VP. Yay." Kozik was pleased when Jax looked at him and gave him a thankful nod. Kozik didn't agree with the drugs deal not just because he was an ex junkie himself but because recently he found Nicole in NA meaning only thing, she has or had a drug problem. But Kozik needed to mend bridges and judging by the way this vote was going Jax and Clay needed his Yay.

"Yay."

"6-5 the vote passes. We make the drop and pick-up the coke tomorrow." Clay locked eyes with Piney's who's were blazing with anger. He was going to become a major pain in the ass. Clay just knew it. "Go home get some rest we're leaving at dawn." Clay hit the gavel and the sound of chairs being scraped across the floor erupted almost immediately.

"So we got the vote." Jax noted as he to got to his feet after everyone had left.

"Yeah. Close." Jax blew out a breath. Close was an understatement. "I'll give Romeo a call, double chec..."

"Uh..guys.."

"What?" Clay bit annoyed by his SAA interuption.

"Think your gonna want to see this. Both of ya." Clay glanced at Jax who seemed just as confused. With a shrug of his shoulders Jax motioned for Clay to go first before following him out towards the bar.

As they moved through the parting that their brothers had made Jax and Clay stepped to the front of the group only for both of them to come to a stop. Neither one able to believe their eyes.


	8. Chapter 8

Everything Changes

Chapter Eight

_Nicole just stood there in the kitchen watching Piney walk away from her. Her head and her heart were racing, and her whole body shook as tears swelled in her eyes. _

_He was alive. That was all she could think about. Her cousin the person who she probably loved the most in this world was alive. He hadn't been killed by the man she looked up as a father figure or by the man she had given her body to just before running. _

_It was all a set up and the fact that she didn't know about it stung a little especially as the memory of those four months flashed through her mind. And with those memories she lost control and crumbled to a heap on the floor as her tears finally fell._

_She stayed like for a while until the constant ringing of her phone brought her from herself wallowing. Wiping her now tear stained face she reached up and grabbed hold of the edge of the counter to support herself as stood on shaky legs. _

_Picking her cell up from the coffee table she looked at the screen and realised she had one missed call and a message._

_Not surprisingly both were from Liam._

Hey sweets, have to go to the cash and carry will be home in about 30 mins.

Can't wait to see you, I hope you've rested today.

See you soon sweets

Love you Liam

Rest, hardly_. She mused as she dropped her cell back onto the glass coffee table. _

_Today had really not gone as she had expected. Finding Piney on her doorstep was shocking enough, but hearing him tell her that Jax was alive and then going on and begging her to come to back to Charming, was...well she still hadn't figured out what it was, but strange was one word that kept pooping into her head. _

_What was going on in Charming that Piney felt the need to drive all the way to LA, and then she thought about why it was Piney. Why was it Piney instead of Jax, if he needed her why wasn't he here. And with that thought her eyes wondered onto the picture sat on top of the fire place. _

_Walking over she picked it up and stared at it as her thumb ran over his face. And that was it. She knew she hadn't really got a choice. She had to go back, she had to see him. Consequences damned._

* * *

"_That was absolutely amazing. But you really didn't have to go to all this trouble Babe, you should be resting." Liam told her as he finished the last bit of his roast beef, before taking a sip of his 2001 Merlot._

"_It's fine." She shrugged. "Plus you've been so good to me lately, I just wanted to say thankyou."_

_"I'm your fiancé, it's my job to look after you."_

"_And as your fiancée it's my job to make sure that your able to look after me." She remarked playfully as she brought her own wine glass to her lips. "And speaking of..." Nicole got to her feet, picking up her almost full plate-she didn't really have an appetite- before making her way down the eight seater table to where Liam was sat at the other end. "I've made desert. Your favourite. Strawberry cheesecake."_

"_I can think of a desert I like much better than that." Nicole let out a squeal as he pulled her onto his lap, making her almost drop the plate in her hand. Luckily Liam caught the plate and placed it safely on the table._

"_Lia..." Nicole was cut off when his lips crashed against hers. _

_His hands worked his way up her bare thigh. Nicole leaned into his kiss upping the intensity, as her hand came up to cup his face. She was enjoying the moment enjoying the direction this was going and although her plan was working- getting him in a good mood before she dropped her bombshell- if she allowed this to continue she knew she would never get round to telling him. So she reluctantly pulled her lips from his, but remained close to him, her forehead resting against his._

"_Liam."_

_"Yes." He answered breathlessly as his hand still continued to run up and down her thigh._

"_I have to tell you something." His hand suddenly stopped as he pulled his head further back so he could at her properly. She could see his concern, worry. Rubbing her thumb over his cheek in a show of affection she continued knowing that he was dying to hear what it was she had to tell him. "I have to go home for a few days."_

_Liam was shocked and relieved at the same time. She wasn't dumping him, but as soon as the shock subsided he became worried. Nicole hadn't spoke a great deal about her family, just that she grew up in a small town in California. He knew that her parents had passed when she was young and after that she went to live with her Aunt and Uncle and her cousin- the same cousin that was in the picture with her that took pride and place on top of the fire place. She had also told him that she had fallen out with her family, although she never went into great deal as to what the argument was about but it was clear in her eyes when she spoke about it that whatever the argument had scared her deeply. And that was why he was shocked by her saying she had to go home, it was completely out of the blue. She hadn't mentioned her family in months._

_"What's wrong, why now?" His voice angry but Nicole sudden felt herself stiffen. And she knew it was because she was about to lie to him, again. _

"_Because I think it's the right time. I know I said it didn't matter but now..." She shrugged her hand dropping from his face. She tried to put some distance between them- it was easier to lie to him that way-but Liam didn't let her escape. His hand grabbed her hip pinning her in place. Letting out a groan of frustration she continued. "I need to see them. I'm getting married and my family have no idea that I'm even with someone. I just..."_

_"You don't want to get married without them knowing?" Nicole nodded. It wasn't the truth but it wasn't exactly a lie either._

_She was going back to Charming to see Jax, to see with her own eyes that he truly was alive. But if she did go back there she knew that she would have to eventually introduce them to Liam, she was marrying him for Christ sake, and hell would have to freeze over before her family would let her marry someone they had never met. Plus Piney had seen the ring so even if she did stay where she was there was a good chance that he would spill the beans anyway. It would defiantly be better if they found out from her rather than someone else. And she knew that from personal experience. Finding out Jax was alive from Piney stung like a knife to the chest._

_"It's stupid I know, but I have to try. Do understand?" He leant in and kissed her before pulling back and resting his head against hers once again. _

"_Maybe I don't fully." He admitted honestly. "But if you feel you need to this sweet then I support you 110%."_

_"Thankyou." Her lips grazed against his._

"_When are we leaving?" Nicole's head shot away from him. _

"_No Liam you don't...I have to do this alone."_

_"No." He spoke as he shook his head firmly. "No I don't want you going there alone. You don't have to do this by yourself. You have me now." He ran his soft fingerers up her arm. "I want to be there for you." Nicole stopped his finger from travelling any further by taking hold of his hand._

_"And I love that you want to do that for me, but...I have to do this on my own."_

_"Nic..."_

_"Liam I've gotta go back and sort things out before I tell them about us, about getting married."_

_"But you will tell them." Liam couldn't put his finger on it but something about the look in he eyes worried him and it wasn't worry about her going back to her family he was worried if she would come back._

"_Of course." _Eventually._ She thought but kept it to herself. She needed to take it in steps. She had no idea what she was about to walk back into, and if Piney was right and something was wrong with Jax then going back wasn't going to be easy and the last thing she needed to do was stroll back into Charming with an outsider on her arm. No her family would not take to kindly to that fiancé or not._

"_I love you." He whispered against her lips as he kissed her again._

"_Me to."_

* * *

"Jay." God he didn't realise how much he had missed being called that or rather missed the one and only person who called him that. Ignoring everything, and everyone he closed the gap that lay between them, wrapping his arms around her as he lifted her feet off the floor. Her bags hitting the floor as she wrapped her arms around his neck, hugging him back with the same force as him.

"I missed you." He whispered into her hair.

"Me to." They continued to hold their embrace for a moment or to longer before the sound of heavy boots came up beside them tore them apart.

As Jax settled her back onto her feet, she turned to see he Uncle.

"Princess."

"Clay." Stepping over her bag she gave him a hug and placed a kiss on his cheek.

Nicole fought back her tears. She never thought she'd be back here. She never thought she'd see her family again let alone Jax.

"We've been looking everywhere for you. You okay?" Nicole nodded unable to speak for fear of completely loosing it. Clay dropped a kiss on top of her head, before whistling to one of the prospects.

"A round of shots to celebrate. Our baby's home." Nicole smile stretched from ear to ear as cheers erupted from her remaining family, before being dragged into their fold.

Clay stood back watching his niece exchange hugs and kisses with his bothers, but the scene didn't make him swell with pride like it had done in the past, because she wasn't supposed to be here. Not that her reappearance would change anything now-not really- they had just voted on the cartel and it had passed, so even if she did start getting into Jax's head it wouldn't make a difference. Even so he still wanted to know why she was here.

"This you?" Clay asked, his voice low. Jax tore his eyes from his cousin to look at Clay.

"No." Jax answered stiffly. As Clay's eyes returned the group. He knew exactly who was behind Nicole's return. Although as his eyes caught Nicole's again he was finding it a little to be mad at Piney.

* * *

"You look good." Opie commented as he pulled Nicole into a bear hug. "Where the hell have you been Nic?" He whispered into her ear.

Nicole knew that question would come and although she knew what she was going to say it still caught her off guard, sent her nerves sky rocketing. _Will they be able to tell I'm lying?_

"Here and there." She answered as she untangled herself from Opie, her eyes catching Kozik's. By Opie's question it was clear to her that he hadn't told them about seeing her, and for that she was grateful.

"Here and there? We checked here and there doll." Nicole turned to Tig who was now taking his turn of kissing her and pulling him into a hug.

"Well I kept moving you know." She looked around the group of men she loved like Uncles and brothers, except for one. But she stopped herself from making eye contact with those dark eyes. One step at a time. "I'm sorry I ran." She continued her voice thick with emotion. "I just..." Nicole stopped when she felt a hand on your hip. Glancing over her shoulder she watched as Jax came to stand beside her. His hand moving from her hip as he draped it over her shoulder pulling her close.

"Phil nother round." Jax cocked his head, as Phil nodded back in response, and scurried round the bar to get the drinks. Nicole noticed that he still had the prospect cut on. He obviously hadn't managed to secure his top rocker in the year, but he was still here meaning that the Sons still saw potential. She was glad, out of Phil and Miles she always favored Phil even if he had walked in on her while she was naked with Happy on top of her. She shuddered at the memory.

They all took another shot and raised another toast in her honer. They were happy to see her. She was relieved but the longer she stood with them the more she realised that something was up, they all looked a little preoccupied and Nicole wondered if it had anything to do with the current state of the clubhouse.

"So what happened here?" She motioned around the destroyed clubhouse.

"Dat wud be da new Sheriff. Roosevelt." Nicole looked at Chibs.

"A cop did this, shit. Wait does that mean Unsers..."

"Nah the old man's still alive." Clay said as moved to stand by her other side.

"Good."

"So where did you land?" Her eyes moved to Bobby's.

"LA." She answered dropping her gaze, she really didn't want to go into any more detail than that, although she knew that would be impossible. But that didn't mean she couldn't try. She placed her hand over her mouth as she faked a yawn.

"You tired?" She nodded her head at Jax.

"Sorry, but think I'm gonna have to call it a night." She announced sleepily.

"That's al'right princess. We've got an early wake up call ourselves." She turned to Clay. "We have a run to Samtaz. You still gonna be here when we get back, it's only an over nighter."

"Yeah, I'll be here."

"Good." He dropped a kiss onto the top of her head. "Promise we'll give ya a proper welcome home when we get back."

"I'm sure of that."

"Take it your gonna spend the night here?" Nicole looked her shoulder at Jax, who nodded in response to her silent question.

"Yeah." She turned back to Clay nodding.

"Okay." He pointed his finger in her face like he was about to tell her off. "You call your aunt first thing in the morning. She'll kill me that I'm not dragging you back home."

"I promise first thing."

"Good girl." Clay kissed her again before saying his goodbyes and leaving the clubhouse.

After watching him leave Nicole headed over to her bags and picked them up.

"I have to make a call. I'll be through in abit." She nodded at Jax and made her ways to his dorm, kisses placed upon her head as she promised them to catch up with them all when they get back.

Nicole was thankful for two things. One, they all knew that her and Jax needed some time alone, they had a lot to catch up on so no one tried to stop her from retreating early. And the second thing she was thankful for was the fact that her hands were occupied, because she didn't want any attention drawn to the fact of who she hugged or rather who she didn't. She could feel his eyes and it was taking all the will power she could muster not to look at him.

But as she was about clear of them she felt a hand on her wrist. Spinning her head round she came face to face with Piney. She didn't know whether she was relived or not.

He never spoke, instead he just dropped a kiss onto her temple as his hand squeezed her wrist. She knew this was his way of saying thankyou and sorry all in one, and as he pulled back Nicole flashed him a sweet smile, telling him that all was forgiven.

* * *

Nicole froze upon entering her cousin dorm. This was another thing she never thought she see again, never step foot inside of yet here she was.

It was weird how none of this felt weird. Seeing her family, hugging them, kissing them, just being near them, then there was the clubhouse itself, it had been a staple in her life since she could remember, it held so many memories some good some bad either way they were memories she would never change. She never expected to feel like this, feel so at home especially after only 5 minutes but she did, it was hard to explain but she didn't think she ever really left this place, even when she was in Nevada she had found herself in a place very similar to her home. But then she remembered this wasn't her home anymore and as if on cue her cell chirped from inside her handbag.

Placing her holdall on the floor out of the way of the door she reached inside her bag searching for her phone, only to come across the 6 carat diamond engagement ring she had shoved inside before entering the clubhouse. Taking a seat on the edge of the bed she found herself getting lost in the dazzling diamond only to be brought back by another chirp from her phone.

Scrunching her eyes shut she exhaled deeply as she placed the ring back inside her bag and fished out her cell. Two messages.

_Hey Babe, Hope you arrived safely. Give me a_

_call when you can. Love you baby _

_PS: missing you already x_

She scraped her fingers through her straight light brown hair, sighing deeply.

"You okay?" Looking up at the door she found Jax standing there, his eyes full of concern.

"Yeah." She answered dropping her phone into her bag as she let it fall to the floor next to her. He nodded but she could tell he didn't believe her.

She couldn't stop herself from giving him the once over. He looked exactly the same, well apart from the short hair, he hadn't had short hair since he was 16, it looked strange, good, but strange. When her eyes returned to his she caught him doing the same thing. A smile crept onto her face. God she'd missed him.

"You look good Nic."

"You sound surprised." she replied with a roll of her eyes.

"I am." She watched him take a deep, heavy breath and she knew that she hadn't been the only one who had suffered.

She sat still as he approached her, coming to kneel in front of her as he took her hand in his as his other hand came up to cup her cheek. She closed her eyes in a bid to stop the tears she knew we threatening to escape. She didn't want to cry.

"I was so worried..." He paused and Nicole could hear the emotion in his voice. Taking a minute, his hand clutching hers tighter he continued. "When they told me you'd gone, I was so scared Nic, I knew that you thought I was..." Nicole opened her eyes ignoring the tears the fell silently. He couldn't say the words and to be honest she didn't want to hear them and she really didn't want to be having this conversation with him. She didn't want to think about the past.

"Jay, I'm fine, I've been fine. We'll not fine considering that I thought you were..." She reached up and pulled the hand from her cheek and squeezed it tightly. "I missed you. I'm sorry I ran Jay. You tried to warn me but I didn't listen." Shocked, she flinched as Jax abruptly let go of her hands and got to his feet, his hands running over his face and cropped hair. She knew he was feeling guilty and for that she felt guilty to.

"I should have just told you." He shouted. Nicole stood to her feet. More tears escaping as she saw the hurt in eyes. Instantly she went to him, her hands cupping his face.

"None of that matters Jay, I'm fine, I'm alive and so are you that's all we should care about not the past okay." Dropping her hands from his face she pulled him into a hug. It took a moment for the tension in his body to ease, before he wrapped his hands around her waist hugging her as tightly as she was him. "I love you."

"I love you to Nic." They continued to hug one another, both savouring the moment as well as thinking about their own consequences of having the other back in their life.

"Don't know about you but I could do with a drink." Nicole smiled as Jax pulled back from her.

"God yes." Smirking he moved passed her and went straight to the bottom drawer of his night stand, and pulled out the bottle of Jack. The last time he had been drinking from that bottle he had been drowning his sorrows about his cousin who was still MIA after 14 months of searching, but now he was about to share the drink with her.

Nicole took a seat on the bed again as Jax went searching in his bottom draw. She was so happy to see him again but there was something niggling away at her, something that she hadn't been able to shake since her talk with Piney.

Jax took a swig from the bottle before handing it to her. She took a big gulp- she really needed it-wiping her mouth with the back of her hand as she grimaced slightly from the burn before she handed the bottle back to Jax as he came to sit beside her.

"Why was it Piney who showed up on my door. And how did he know where I was?" Nicole was shocked by her own outburst. Of course she was dying to ask him that but at the same time she didn't mean to be so blunt.

Jax took another sip from the bottle. He didn't know what to say to her, what would make sense to her without telling her whole truth about the deal he'd made with Clay about getting out, the deal with the cartel, that the cartel was the reason Piney was on her doorstep instead of him. He knew to explain why it was Piney on her doorstep he'd have to explain all that shit and he would, he didn't want to keep anything from her again but at the same time he was tired. He couldn't have this conversation now. He just wanted to enjoy the moment, enjoy having her back without spoiling it all with all that shit.

He took her hand once again.

"How long are you here for?" He knew that she had a life in LA now, and that she wouldn't just throw that all away-well actually she would if she thought he needed her- but this was just a visit he knew that and in one way he pleased. He didn't want her here. He hadn't forgot about the reasons why he had made the deal with Clay about leaving Nicole where she was. She was safer out of Charming. _Ironic. _He never thought that would be true.

"A few days I guess." To be honest Nicole hadn't really though about how long she was going to be staying with is why she had and open ended ticket. "I don't know." She shrugged reaching for the bottle and taking another swig.

"I promise I'll you everything but right now Nic I'm tired, we're heading out at 6.30 and I just wanna enjoy this I don't wanna..."

"Okay." She cut in. She could see the strain in his eyes. Piney was right Jax needed her and she was going to do whatever she could to help him, but at the same time it had been a long day and she couldn't agree with him more, plus she didn't want the conversation heading down a road she wasn't ready to go down.

"Okay?"

"Okay." She mirrored the smile that was now gracing his face. "So did you have a boy or a girl?" For a spilt second Jax wondered what the hell she was on about and the he realised that she hadn't been around to see the birth of his son, just like he hadn't. Draping his arm over her shoulders he pulled her closer.

"A boy. His names Thomas."


	9. Chapter 9

Everything Changes 

Chapter Nine

Nicole looked at the silver Rolex on her wrist. 5.10. _Way to early. _She thought as she turned to look at the sleeping body beside her.

They had spent the rest of night discussing what had happened during their time apart. Of course Jax didn't have a lot to tell as he didn't want to discuss his time spent in Stockton, it fell under the heavy category that they had agreed not to talk about. However she watched his eyes light up as he spoke about his new born, Thomas and how Abel had grown so much. He also dropped the bombshell that he had finally maned up and proposed to Tara, although they hadn't gone public with it yet. Although she congratulated Nicole wasn't sure what to make of it. Her and Tara had never been BBF and probably never would be- Nicole still couldn't fully forgive her for breaking Jax's heart- but before she left they had been getting on better, and unlike herself and unlike her past history when the time had got tough she hadn't run. So Nicole had to give her that.

Then the conversation turned onto her. He commented on all the designer gear and her new choice of clothes, and how very un-biker chic they were asking her what had happened to his cousin. Of course she laughed, and explained about how she was managing this swanky bar in one of LA's hotspot and how she was being paid ridiculous money for doing pretty much the same thing she did here at the clubhouse for free.

But as she explained all that she found herself leaving out one very important piece of information. Liam. She couldn't explain why but she just couldn't bring herself to tell Jax that she had met someone and was planning on marrying in a few short months.

It was weird and was probably the reason why she was wide awake at this stupid hour. She knew it was best for her to come to Charming alone because there was a lot of shit to deal with- the fact that she thought her cousin was dead, killed by her own family only for it to have been some stunt to get payback on the ATF bitch Stahl and to get their sentence reduced-but she had every intention on telling them about Liam but for some reason last night she just couldn't and for the life of her she couldn't explain why.

Closing her eyes she tried to stop herself from thinking about this shit, it was way to early. Knowing that if she stayed put she would only continue to over analyse it, Nicole slipped from beneath the covers. Shivering from the chill of the morning air Nicole went over to her holdall in search of something warm to put on. Silk pj's may feel good but there definitely not made for warmth and it didn't help that she was wearing matching just a camisole and a pair of shorts.

As she rummaged through her clothes she felt the thickness of the jacket that she had packed at the bottom. To this day she didn't know why she kept it and she had no idea why she had brought it with her, maybe closure, she wasn't sure. But again it was too early to be thinking about that. Letting go of the jacket she found what she was looking for.

Easing the door open she slid out closing it as quietly as she could behind her. Wrapping the fluffy white cardigan around her small frame she tip-toed towards the kitchen barefoot.

Seeking out the coffee machine she started it immediately. She was a girl in need. She looked around at the new equipment that was in the kitchen. _Roosevelt must have done one hell of a number on this place._ That thought worried her.

Taking a sip of her freshly brewed coffee, her eyes fluttered closed in satisfaction. It tasted so good. She was on her second cup when she glanced at her watch again. 5.30. And without so much as a second thought Nicole got to her feet, placed her coffee on the side and turned her attention to the fridge as she went into Nicole Teller SOA princess mode.

Jax said they were heading out at 6.30 which most of them would surface about 6.25. That gave her more than enough time to rustle up a quick spread for them, before they headed out to Samtaz.

By 6.00 everything was on track. The bacon was crisping, the sausage sizzling in the pan and the bread toasting as she started working on the eggs. But as she turned to the fridge to get the milk for the scrambled egg, she stopped dead on the spot when she saw Happy leaning against the door frame his arms folded across his chest as he looked at her with a blank expression.

"Morning." She barely managed to croak out, her mouth having suddenly gone dry. He said nothing, did nothing. "I'm making breakfast you want some?" She let out a breath that she didn't realise she was holding when he nodded at her. But her relaxed state didn't last long as he moved from the doorway towards her.

Happy had to admit his wasn't keen on getting up this morning especially after the amount of Whisky he had put away last night, but when he stepped outside of his dorm room and was hit by the scent of bacon cooking, his mood eased. Breakfast, that was exactly what he needed.

But when he came to the kitchen he hadn't expected to see her standing over the stove.

When he had walked out of church to see her standing there his eyes did a quick scan of her, she was unharmed, in fact she looked good, pretty fucking good. He felt the relief sweep over his body, but everyone was the same they were all happy to see her and to see her in one piece especially considering her track recorded, the girl only seemed to find trouble or it found her, he wasn't sure.

But he wasn't sure that all of his brother would admire the view in front of him in the same way he was.

She looked good, a little smaller than the last time he seen her-his jaw clenched at the thought of that day, the look in her eyes, it had haunted him many a night while he was on the inside-her hair was lighter and a little shorter, he wasn't sure if he liked it.

He didn't get any longer to continue his inspection of her, because she turned to face him stopping dead when she saw him.

He didn't speak but that wasn't unusual. It was only when she offered him breakfast did he push himself from the door frame he was leaning against and move towards her until there was only inches separating them, did he speak.

"I'll have the works, Eggs sunny side up."

"Okay."

Turning her attention back to the stove she started dishing him up a plate. The room was engulfed in silence but she could feel him watching her. She wondered what he was thinking but then again Happy had always been hard to read.

"Here." She tuned and handed him his plate. Her lips twitched as he accepted it. Grabbing himself some cutlery off the side he took a seat on the chair behind her, instead of at bar like she thought he would have. _Great. _Unable to bare looking at him she turned back to the stove.

But as she scrambled the egg she couldn't stop herself it was another thing that had been niggling away at her since her talk to Piney. _Damn Piney. _

"We're you going to tell me? The day you were arrested we're you going to tell me about the deal?" She blurted out as she turned to face him again.

Happy froze for a spilt second, his fork stopping midair before he regained his composure.

Watching him place the forkful of food into his mouth Nicole knew she wasn't going to get answer, and she wasn't surprised. Shaking her head she turned back to the stove yet again in a hope to distract herself.

It wasn't until she heard the plate hit the counter next to her did she realise that Happy was by her side, his body practically touching hers. _How do they do that?_

"Yes."

"Why?" She asked breathlessly. She had forgotten how unnerving it was having this man so close to her. Especially giving her recent dreams about the man in front of her.

"Because I knew you'd run. Didn't need that shit."

"You didn't or the club didn't?" _What the hell?_ She had no idea where the hell that came from. And she wasn't even sure she wanted to know, wasn't sure if she wanted to go there with him. And thankfully she didn't have to.

Happy picked up his plate and backed away from her as the sound of his brother voices filled the hallway. Nicole again turned her back on him. This time she tried to control her breathing, which had suddenly increased.

By the time Happy exited the room Nicole was surrounded by sons barking orders at her telling her what they wanted before telling she was amazing. _It's only breakfast. _Servring them all a plate she couldn't stop her eyes from wondering over to Happy who was now sat at the bar finishing off his food.

He was actually going to tell her, breaking the deal that he had made with his brothers about keeping the whole Stahl set-up a secret from herself, Gemma, Tara and Lyla.

If she had just let him come to her after he freed himself from the clutches of the officers holding him, she would have know what was happening, he would have told her truth. If she had just let him then she would never have to have gone through those four months, she would never of gone to Darby and begged for him to end her life.

Why hadn't she trusted the man she had trusted her whole life?

"Hey." Jax's voice broke into her thoughts and brought her back to the hear and now. Tearing her eyes from Happy, Nicole turned to her cousin that was standing next to her. His brow creased in confusion before his head turned in the direction she had been staring. She looked down at her feet when his eyes returned to hers, she knew that he knew who she had been staring at. She was just glad he didn't know about whatever it was they had before they had gone inside.

"Breakfast?" She asked hoping the change of subject would help alleviate the awkward moment between them.

"Yeah." _Shit. _He may have in someways come to accept the strange relationship between his little cousin and the Tacoma killer but the way she was just looking or rather staring at him was disarming. She couldn't stay here. And he hoped that whoever the mystery caller had been who had woken him from his slumber would be able to help with keeping her from wanting to stay in Charming. He placed her cell on the side.

"You had two missed calls."

"Oh right, sorry if they woke you."

"It's al'right." He took the plate she was offering him. "Who's Liam?" He didn't miss the widening of her eyes.

"Just my boss." _Why am I lying? _Well it wasn't a complete lie, Liam did own the bar and several others but he was more than her boss, he was her fiancé. Jax just nodded seeming to accept her answer. Dropping a kiss upon her head he walked out of the kitchen to join his brothers.

* * *

After seeing them off Nicole headed back to Jax's room and headed straight for the shower.

After towel drying her hair the best she could she rummaged through her bag, pulling out a pair of light blue wide leg jeans and a simple cream silk camisole and a cream blazer.

Once dress she managed to contain her natural waved hair into a low ponytail. Just as she finished putting on her Jimmy Choo gold flip flops her phone started ringing again. A quick glance of the ID told her who it was, although she already guessed. She really didn't know why she was finding this so hard. It was her fiancé she should want to talk to him, want to hear his voice.

As the phone continued ringing she inhaled deeply and pressed answer on her Iphone4.

"Hey."

"_God it's good to hear your voice. Are you okay I was so worried I havent heard from __you sin..."_

"I'm fine Liam. I'm sorry for not calling I just..." She let out a shuddered breath. "I got caught up in everything. I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you worry."

"_I'll always worry about you sweets, I love you._" _God he's so sweet. _The line was quiet and Nicole knew he was waiting for he response but for some reason she couldn't find one. _"You sure okay you seem...I'm worried."  
_  
"Don't be I'm fine Liam. I swear." He didn't believe she could hear the doubt as he breathed heavily down the phone. She didn't need this, she was to emotional right now. "Look I've got to go."

_"Okay. You sure your okay?"  
_  
"Yes." Her tone was more frustrated than she meant it to be, but she just needed some space.

Finding out someone you loved dearly, someone who thought had been murdered by your family, is actually alive takes it out of you and Nicole needed to process all of that. Plus she also knew there was something going on here, something that Jax was keeping from her and then there was Happy, her head was all over the place trying to figure that shit out. And then there was Kozik, what if he'd told someone, she was even wondering why he hadn't told anyone, that seemed to confuse her more. And then there was just dealing with being back in Charming. She needed to process and right now as harsh as it was she couldn't have her new life crossing with her old one, not yet anyway.

_"Okay."_ He sounded hurt and Nicole just wanted to kick herself. _"I love you Sweets."_

"Me to."

"_Call me later?"_

"Yeah. Bye." And with those parting words Nicole hung up feeling like shit. But she didn't have time to wallow she had to go and see Gemma. _This should be fun._

* * *

"What do you mean you couldn't get them?" Gemma snapped as she leant in towards Unser who was sitting next to her at the large dining table.

"I'd just had my hand on them, but Tara's boss came in."

"Shit." She took a drag from her cigarette. "She suspect anything?"

"No. Told her I wanted to ask Tara some questions about my condition. She offered to help instead." Gemma cocked one of her perfectly arched brows. "We went for coffee."

"Why Wayne you old dog." Unser blushed under Gemma's intense gaze. "You're going to have to try again."

"Think it's best to wait a couple of days, don't want to draw unwanted attention."

"Margaret's unwanted attention?..." she enjoyed watching Unser squirm. "Tomorrow."

"What?"

"I'll create a window for you."

"Gemma...I don't..."

"Tara's going to help me prepare for Nicole's homecoming meal. That's your window. She'll be here at one." She told him ignoring the _I don't think this is a good idea _look Unser was giving her.

"Nicole's back?"

"Yes I am." Both of their heads snapped towards the door where Nicole was now standing, a smile on her face.

Subbing out her cigarette. Gemma hastily closed the gap between herself and Nicole and pulled her into a hug.

"Missed you sweetheart."

"Missed you to Aunt Gemma." As they pulled apart they could both see the tears glistening in the others eyes. Both so happy to finally see one another. Before Nicole was suddenly pushed arms length away. Gemma's eyes giving her the once over.

"You've lost weight. You look different, your hair..." Gemma eyes continued there inspection of her niece until her eyes reached Nicole's once again. She looked sad, like the lost little girl Gemma had taken under her wing after her brother and sister in-laws deaths. And Gemma realised that Nicole didn't need to hear that shit. "You look good baby, pretty."

"Thanks." Nicole leant over and kissed her Aunt's cheek before her eyes found Unser. "Hey."

"Hey there sweetheart." Unser got to his feet and came to join the two women, who he loved dearly like his own family.

"You okay?" Nicole asked him as she gave him a quick hug.

"Still breathing sweetheart so I'm good." Nicole gave him a small smile as she pulled back. "Well I'll leave you to it. I'm sure you've got a lot to catch up on." Unser was making his way out of the door when Gemma called out to him.

"Tomorrow." Gemma caught the confused look on Nicole's face out of the corner of her eye. "Family dinner. Be here at 7." Unser begrudgingly nodded knowing that wasn't exactly what Gemma was talking about.

"Everything okay?" Nicole asked as Unser left.

"Fine."

"Unser's okay right?" Gemma turned her head giving her full attention to Nicole.

"Della left him."

"Shit. Why?" Gemma shrugged. Before turning her whole body to Nicole and reaching out to cup her nieces face. "Enough about that old man, I want to know what's been happening with you."

Nicole smirked before following Gemma's lead and taking a seat at the table where she started to recount her past 14 months, the same clean cut edited version that she had shared with Jax last night.

* * *

Nicole waited outside the flower shop, her allergies stopping her from entering. But to be fair she would use any excuse possible to put a little bit of distance between herself and her overbearing Aunt.

It seemed that Gemma wasn't fully convinced by Nicole clean cut version of what she'd been doing when she had been away. She never came right out and said it but Nicole just knew could see it in her eyes, she knew she was lying/hiding something. And she had been trying to catch her out all morning. Even when they were at Jax's -Gemma had taken her to see Abel and Thomas- she tried to pick floors in her story even tried to get Neeta involved. Nicole was lucky she made it out of there in one piece.

She found mind drifting onto the poster hung in the window of the small flower shop. Apparently Jacob Hale- Nicole rolled her eyes at the thought of that man- was lead developer on this so called Charming Heights venture, which was spoiling the gardens of Charming to make from some stupid condos that the people who lived in Charming couldn't even afford it was a joke.

"Shame about the gardens isn't it?" Nicole tuned round to see a tall dark haired man standing behind her. On reflex she took a step back.

"Yeah." She answered watching him closely as he placed a cigarette in his mouth his hands patting down his jacket for a lighter. Gathering that he obviously didn't have one Nicole reached inside her bag and retrieved hers. "Thankyou." He lent in and lit his cigarette. "Mick Stackhouse." He announced offering his hand.

"Nicole." She answered and hesitantly accepted his hand.

"Hopefully Hale won't be able to lock down new investors."

"New investors?" Nicole inquired. She knew a project like this couldn't get as far as it had without investors which meant he'd obviously lost his.

"Well after those Russians bodies were found his investors pulled out. Not surprislying."

"No I guess not. So what happens if he doesn't get investors?"

"City council will have to take another vote, and I like said those dead bodies won't help."

"So the council could shut it all down? How do you all of this?"

"I work for the zoning department."

"Right."

"Well it was lovely meeting you Nicole, but I have somewhere I need to be. Maybe I'll see you around?" Nicole was thrown by his last words. He wasn't coming on to her it was something else and she couldn't put her finger on it, either way she hoped that she didn't run in to this Mick Stackhouse any time soon.

But on the other hand he had given her some insight as to what's being going on around here and maybe what was eating Jax.

The Russians. She hadn't forgot that the Sons had given Putlova fake money, meaning she hadn't forgotten about the threat of retaliation. And although the Sons would make sure they were damn well prepared for the Russian retaliation they wouldn't make the first move, meaning the Russian bodies found in Charming heights-which was not by accident she was sure- was the Sons way of retaliating meaning Putlova had made his move. And that worried Nicole, what had they done, and who had they focused their retaliation on.

"You ready baby?" Nicole turned to face her aunt. "You okay?"

"I think we need to have a little chat about some Russians."


	10. Chapter 10

The last time I posted this story I didn't make it past Chapter 9, so here after a very very long wait is Chapter 10, and I can promise you with hand on heart there are plenty more chapters to come this time.

Thank you all for the adds and to those who have taken time to review. I know this story runs along with the show and uses a lot of Kurt Stutter's genius but it's really nice to hear your reviews (good or bad) on how you feel that i'm doing integrating my OC Nicole (who by the way I love writing) into the story lines.

And I want to say a final thank you to those who are just reading. As much as I love to hear feedback it still makes me happy to see the view count and knowing people out there are still enjoying reading this story.

Well enough of my babbling. Enjoy...

Everything Changes 

Chapter Ten

Nicole opened the door to Jax's house only to come face to face with her cousin and Tara with their tongues shoved down one another's throats. Shaking hear head and smiling she cleared her throat alerting the loved up couple to her presence.

"Hey." She gave them a small wave as they looked at her. She didn't miss the flush of embarrassment from Tara, or the smug look of her cousin.

"Nic." Nicole moved over to the two. This was the first time she'd seen Tara since returning and as much as she'd love a catch up she really needed to talk with Jax. Alone.

"Nicole, it's good to see you."

"You to T." Nicole accepted her hug before pulling back as her eyes landed on Abel who was tugging at her leg. "Hey little man." Bending down she picked him up and rested him on her hip as she kissed his cheek. He was so much like Jax. "You've done a good job T. Both of them are beautiful."

"Thank you." Tara blushed.

"Oh and congratulations by the way." Tara's eyes shot to Jax and Nicole could she the flair of anger.

"I thought we decided we weren't telling anyone." She tried to whisper but Nicole heard her clear as day.

"Nic ain't just anyone." Nicole tried to hide the smile of her face by concentrating on her little nephew who was playing with he hair. "So what's with the early call?" Jax asked as he stepped away from Tara And suddenly Nicole's expression became more serious which Jax noticed. "What is it?"

"I um..I was wondering if we could..um..talk." She hoped not to cause to much alarm, but knew she had failed if the blue eyes staring at her were anything to go by.

"Sure. You okay?" Jax came to stand closer to her, his eyes narrowed as he tried to assess if this was good or bad. And when she wouldn't look at him properly he knew it was bad.

"Not here." She whispered so only Jax and probably Abel could hear. He nodded his head, his arm running down hers in a comforting gesture. He took Abel from her and walked back to Tara passing his son to his mother.

"I'll catch up with you later." He dropped a kiss on her lips.

"Jax.." He looked back at her and Tara stood there giving him the eye. "We were kind of in the middle of something..." She not so kindly reminded him.

"Jay if your busy it's fine we can do this later." Jax looked back at his cousin.

"Nah it's fine." Looking away and stepping back to Tara. His hand resting on her cheek. "I won't be long." Jax lowered his voice. "Somethings up with her i need to find out what." He tried to kiss her again but Tara turned her head away offering him her cheek rather than her lips. "I love you."

"I love you." Tara spoke through gritted teeth. She did love him but right now she was pissed off with him. Which is why she wouldn't look at him. Jax nodded knowing that in the space of a mintue his future wife had just gone from happy to pissed. Both were his doing. Deciding it was best to just leave her, Jax dropped a kiss onto his son's blonde hair before turning to Nicole and motioning her towards the door.

"Bye T."

"Yeah, bye." Nicole raised her eyebrows at Jax. Nicole felt a little bad but at the same time she really needed to talk to Jax. "I think she's a little pissed." Nicole said to Jax as they left the house. Jax just shrugged off her comment.

"Shit..." Jax let out a low whistle as he took in the ice white Mercedes Carlsson convertible. "This yours?"

"It's just a rental."

"Shit still must cost." Nicole shrugged and decided to change the subject. Of course this rental was expensive but when your soon to be husband has a limitless credit card the cost didn't really matter. But she couldn't tell him that yet.

"So where can we go, we really need to talk." She was glad to see his attention back on her instead of the car.

"Clubhouse? It will be quiet everyone will be getting some shut eye."

"Okay." Nicole slipped behind the steering wheel of her car and turned over the engine. Jax tailing behind her.

Tara was stunned. She knew this would happen, she knew Nicole would do this. She had such a pull over Jax it was scary. And it really did scare her. They had a plan, a plan that was going to save her family, get them all clear of Charming once an for all. And considering the amount of money Jax had just given her they were taking the right steps even if she was a little unnerved about it all being in cash but she was glad that they were at least heading in the right direction.

From what Jax had told her- which wasn't much- Nicole was living in LA had a job managing a bar, a well paid job if her clothes and designer accessories were anything to go by. But that was it, and Tara wondered if that was going to be enough to keep her from Charming, to stop her from running back to her family, back to Jax. Tara had a unsettling feeling that it wasn't and if anyone could ruin their plans of leaving it was her.

* * *

Nicole followed Jax into the clubhouse, it was completely empty just like Jax had predicted. _Thank god._

"So what's this all about?" Jax asked tensly as he closed the door to his dorm behind him.

"Russians." Nicole turned to face Jax, who had suddenly stilled.

"Nic..."

"No don't do that don't look at me like that. You said you would tell me Jay, so tell me." Suddenly the anger in her voice disappeared as was replaced with concern/worry. "Are you okay?"

"I think you should sit down." Jax let out a heavy breath as he motioned towards his bed.

"Why do I get a feeling I'm not going to like this?" She remarked taking a seat on the edge of his bed. Jax moved in front of her but remained on his feet.

"You remember the day we were arrested..."

"How could I forget..." Jax couldn't agree more he didn't want to think about that day any more than she did.

"Anyway...The Russians were pissed bout the fake money. They retaliated."

"When you were on the inside?" Jax nodded. "Ho..." Nicole stopped suddenly there was only way they could have retaliated on the inside. Nicole dreaded the thought but of course she needed an answer. "Who?" She watched his eyes fall from hers and suddenly she realised that it was him, he had been the one to suffer the retaliation.

She was on her feet and standing in front of him in a heartbeat. Her eyes searching his for answers. And she got them when Jax lifted his shirt revealing three little scars under his left peck. Her hand automatically reached out as she carefully ran the tip of her fingers over the scars. Her touch made him flinch and Nicole's eyes shot to his.

"Tickles." He smirked.

"This isn't funny Jay." He took hold of her wrist as he let his shirt fall back down.

"I'm okay Nic." He placed her hand over his heart. "See, still alive." Nicole fought back her smile. There wasn't nothing funny about this.

"For now. Jay I know about the bodies. You're getting yourself into deep shit, you how deep the Russians go, you think their just going to let you get away with killing four of them. What were you thinking?" By the time her words were out she had put some distance between them and her hands were running through her hair in frustration. _How could they be so stupid. _

Jax watched his cousin and he knew he had to tell her he just wasn't sure how she was going to handle it. Coming up behind her he lightly took her elbow and spun her so that she was facing him again.

"Your right about the Russians, but we've made this new deal. A deal that will protect us. No blow back, no retaliation." He said firmly making sure he kept eye contact with her so she knew that he was telling the truth.

"Why doesn't that make feel better?" She mumbled as she moved out of his hold and took a seat on the bed again. "So this new deal must be pretty dangerous. More dangerous than the Russians."

"Nic you know I wouldn't go into this blind." Jax reassured as he joined her on the bed.

"I know..." Jax took a moment to take a breath.

"We struck up this deal on the inside, Mayans helped us, pointed them in our direction."

"This is just getting better and better." _Mayans_. She knew that the Mayans and Samcro were now on some sort of good terms, but she would still never fully trust a man in a Mayan cut. But then again why would she, they were the one's responsible for giving the Calaveres tribe a leg up, they were the ones who had brought Salazar into their lives, her life. She shuddered at the thought of that man. It had been a long time since she had let herself think of him. "So this deal who's it with?"

"Gallindo." Her eyes shot to Jax, she'd heard that name before. Jax wasn't looking at her his eyes were glued to the floor. He was nervous and that wasn't a good sign. "It's a cartel." He confessed.

Nicole felt like her heart had stopped. Drugs. Samcro was involved in drugs. And it suddenly became clear to her where she had heard that name before. From the circles she had been moving in, in those four months she had met many a shady character and none were more shady than the guys who belonged to a Cartel.

She felt sick, could actually feel the bile rising in her throat. _This wasn't happening, it had to be a joke._ She tried to rationalise in her head.

"Say something Nic." She shook her head, realising that she was starting to panic and she couldn't do that, not in front of him. So in true Teller style she put on her game face and composed herself.

"Okay. So your doing drugs. Dealing?"

"No..no..We're just muling, Mayans are distributing. For now."

"What does _for now _mean?"

"Samtaz is dealing."

"Shit." That was not good. If one club started dealing it wouldn't be long before the other charters followed, especially when they realised the profit involved.

"Clay made them take another vote but apparently they'd gotten used to the money and voted it in again. Nothing we could do."

"You think that will happen here?" Again she felt the rise of panic in her chest. A cartel hanging around Samcro scared the shit out of her, and was thankful when she saw Jax shake his head.

"No..No I wont let it. This is just a sort time deal."

"Jay it's not that easy." Her voice was sympathetic because she knew that her cousin was dreaming if he thought handling a Cartel was going to be like handling Darby. You did not dictate to a cartel. "You can't just walk away from them whenever you want to. That's not the way Cartel's work. You leave when they say not the other way around. You shouldn't go along with this you need to get out now before it's to late..."

_Where the hell did that come from._ Jax continued to stare at his cousin in bewilderment. This wasn't exactly the subject that his cousin should know so much about.

"Since when do you know so much about Cartel's?" _Shit. _She'd said too much._ Shit. Think, think, think. _

"In case you'd forgotten I did use to date a drug dealers son." She thought that might work but it didn't in fact it made his look darken. _ "_What, what's wrong?"

"Just hate the fact that you were ever with a prick like that." Jax snapped bitterly. Nicole just rolled her eyes and Jax felt her tense beside him.

"You shouldn't speak ill of the dead Jay." She mumbled beneath her breath.

"Sorry."

"It's okay." She gave him a small smile and could tell that he wasn't convinced. "Seriously I'm fine."

"I missed you, you know that right?"

"And I've missed you more than you'll ever know." Jax scooted closer and pulled her close to his side.

* * *

Roosevelt was quickly coming to the conclusion that Linc Potter was seriously unhinged on some levels but on the other hand he couldn't deny it the man was good at his job. After finding the Russian bodies they thought maybe all was lost but Linc had managed to figure out the reason behind why the Sons had suddenly become so bold as to dump 4 bodies in their own back yard. They had a new alliance and their new alliance was none other than the Gallindo Cartel.

Which meant they were back on track with RICO.

Linc had also divulged that he had the pleasure- Linc's words- of meeting one Miss Nicole Teller.

She'd been MIA since the Sons incarceration and according to Linc even though he had tried various methods it had been impossible to even pick up a trail on her, which Linc found rather interesting. He never said much more about it, in fact he changed the subject pretty quickly, and moved the conversation onto the reason why he had called him into the war room.

Juan Carlos aka Juice was going to give them the present in the RICO case, and Linc wanted Roosevelt to make his move.

Which is why Roosevelt was found himself standing in front of said man, telling him how things were going to be with them.

"This is a simple trade Juice. You give me some truth and i'll protect yours." Roosevelt informed the young biker.

"Truth about what?"

"My sources say a major player surfaced in Northern Cali. Gallindo Cartel."Roosevelt noticed the shift in Juice's eyes, a shift that reflected guilt. He knew the name.

"Where the hell you going with this?"

"I'm not going after your club. I'm going after the drugs." Okay so Roosevelt wasn't exactly being honest, but it was a necessary lie. "Look you don't have much of a choice here. I'm gonna set up random piss tests so that it will give us some time to talk. Because you will talk to me Juice, or I will reveal your family tree. With that threat he walked away leaving Juice to think about what he'd just been offered.

* * *

Nicole was sat at the bar. Jax had gone home needing some much needed sleep and to suck up to Tara for abandoning her earlier. He invited her back but she declined, knowing she needed to get her head clear and what better place to do that than an empty clubhouse.

Although it was still early 11.30, Nicole found herself staring at the shelf behind the bar where all the liquor bottles were lined up. She could really do with a shot of something strong, the cigarettes weren't working and she couldn't smoke a joint or pop a pill so..._Would it really hurt? Fuck it. _

Nicole stubbed out her cigarette and slid off the stool and walked around the bar. She reached for the Tequila and poured herself a shot downing it one. It barely touched the sides so she poured herself another. She was about to take her fourth when she froze.

"Nicky." _Fuck. _Placing the shot glass and the bottle of Tequila on the bar she turned to face Kozik. He wasn't angry well not completely, no, the way he was looking at her was one of sympathy or rather pity and she hated that. Especially considering what he knew. So she took that fourth shot.

"What are you doing?" Again his sympathy being made clear. God she hated pity.

"What does it look like?" She knew she shouldn't be snapping at him but she was just so angry that he was looking at her in that way. She wasn't a victim and she was done feeling sorry for herself, so she didn't want anyone else to either.

Kozik didn't say anything as he took a seat at the bar. Nicole was worried although Kozik didn't know everything he knew more than anyone else or at least had an idea. And it scared her. But then again Kozik hadn't said anything from what she could make which intrigued her.

"Why haven't you said anything?" Kozik finally looked her in the eyes. He looked uncomfortable. Again she was intrigued. "It's been months and from what I can tell you haven't said a word. Why?"

"I've been there Nic..." He sighed running a hand over the subtle littered along his jaw and chin. He couldn't tell her truth, it would kill her to think Gemma had been plotting behind her back. "I know that shit takes time." He looked up at her and stared into her eyes. His hand reaching out for hers. She didn't stop him. "You doing okay?"

Nicole held his hand tighter. She realised that he wasn't looking at her with pity it was sympathy because he understood her, because like he said he'd been there, and weirdly it gave her some sort of comfort. She wasn't sure why she had never thought about it before. She might not be able to tell him everything but out of everyone here, Jax included he was probably the only one who could understand and not judge her for it.

"It hasn't been easy." She admitted.

"Never is. But you seem good, obviously your clean now?" Nicole nodded. "Can I ask you something?" Again she nodded. "No one hurt you did they. I just...Shit I know what kind of shit holes you can find yourself in when you're dying for that next hit..." Nicole tried to pull her hand free because she couldn't bare to look at him, she was to embarrassed, to disgusted with herself because she had landed in many a shit hole and yes she had been hurt but this was the part she couldn't tell him.

Kozik didn't like that she was trying to pull away from him because it meant he had hit a nerve. And he wished to god he hadn't. The reality of what he might have just stumbled on made him physically shake with anger. She had been hurt, someone had hurt her.

"Nicky.." He grabbed her hand tighter. "Who?"

"No one Koz, it just..." She had to give something, he wouldn't let her go if she didn't at least give him something. So she lied. It had become so easy to her it was like a reflex now. "There was this one guy but it was nothing serious. He hit me once but that was it Koz, I probably wouldn't remember him if I fell over him I was so high."

"You're lying to me." Nicole placed her other hand over theirs.

"I promise. I'm okay." He shook his head.

"I shouldn't have let you go, I should have gone after you."

"Koz I was out of that building so quick..."

"I'm not talking about then, I'm talking about 14months ago. I should have done more."

"And I shouldn't have run." She pinned him with her intense gaze. "We could all go back and forth about what we should and shouldn't have done but it's not going to change a damn thing, what's done is done. Everyone is okay, alive, I'm okay so please can we just focus on that. I've done all my healing Koz, I'm clean. I just want to forget everything..." Kozik didn't miss the glint of tears or the crack in her voice. _What happened to her? _"The past is the past Koz, please just leave it alone."

She obviously really wanted to forget whatever the hell it was that had happened to her, and as much as he wanted to push her into telling him more, he knew he couldn't. His guess was that she hadn't even been clean for a year, which meant she was still in the danger zone of relapsing-which was the last thing he wanted-so he would drop it for now and leave the past in the past.

He rubbed his thumb over her knuckles and was happy to see her smile, and as long as she kept smiling like that then that was good enough for him. _For now._

"What are you doing?" Nicole looked at him confused as he suddenly let go of her hand and lent over the bar.

"Well I've told ya before, drinking alone it just to dam pathetic and you Teller are not pathetic." He sat back on the stool and held his glass up.

Nicole shook her head. She really had missed these boys.


	11. Chapter 11

Everything Changes

Chapter Eleven

"Where's your ring?" Tara stopped chopping the vegetables to look up at Gemma who was standing beside her, a little to close in Tara's opinion. She shouldn't have been surprised that Gemma knew but she was and in fact she was a little pissed off about it. First Nicole now Gemma. "Come on who did you think was going to get the ring for him." Gemma smirked as Tara's eyes grew wider. "Don't worry he picked it himself. So why the delay, thought you'd be screaming it from the roof tops. You finally have your man."

_Yes I do, and we're getting ourselves and our family as far away from here, from you, as possible. _That's what was running through Tara's mind but she decided to keep that bit to herself.

"We're waiting for the right moment, I think he wanted to wait until he found Nicole." She shrugged going back to chopping the vegetables for the meal tonight.

"You do realise you helping me prepare for her welcome home meal right?" Tara rolled her eyes, an action Gemma didn't miss. "Why don't you do it tonight. Everyone will be here so it should be the perfect time."

"Yeah, maybe." Gemma eyes narrowed at her. As far as she knew Tara still hadn't divulged to Jax about the letters. Unser was on the case trying to retrieve the letters from her office, but that wasn't enough for Gemma, even if Unser got the letters Tara still had knowledge of them, knowledge of what was written within them-which was more than what Gemma had. And although it was killing her to know what poison that Irish gnash had spat, the importance of this little chat was to remind Tara of what was at stake if the contents of those letters ever got out.

"You two remind me of myself and JT." Gemma watched carefully out of the corner of her eye as Tara momentarily stilled, before quickly regaining her composure. Gemma continued. "We were so in love, I was 19 and his was my whole world."

Tara fully turned her head to get a look at Gemma, and was shocked. For the first since she had known the woman she had never seen her like this, never seen her so exposed, vulnerable. Tara wondered what was the cause for this sudden change in persona and then she watched Gemma pull something from her back pocket, and as her eyes read over the note Tara knew that Gemma knew.

"But it didn't last. On his part anyway. But I guess you know all about that." Gemma placed the note onto the chopping board in front of Tara.

"Where did you get that?" Tara recognised the note immediately. It was the note written by this Maureen Ashby that had been attached to the pile of letters she'd found.

"Fell out of one of Abel's colouring books. Take it you've read these letters she refers to."

"I don't..."

"Don't..." Tara swallowed the lump in her throat, she'd been caught. "Don't try and lie to me sweetheart." Tara shuddered at the warning. "You spoken to Jax about Belfast?" Tara shook her head. She had asked what had happened but Jax refused to talk about it saying Abel was back and that was all that mattered. They had been in such a bad place when he had left that she didn't want to push him, especially since their relationship was back on track. So Tara had left it at that, and was happy to, well until she found those letters that was.

"This Maureen Ashby, she's JT's other Old Lady. I didn't know about her. When Thomas died he was lost, we both were..." Gemma paused briefly taking a breath before continuing. IT was a painful time for her. "He kept taking runs to Belfast leaving me here to deal with all this on my own. I guess on some level I always knew that there was someone else in his life but not another Old lady, and defiantly not another kid."

"JT had a child with her?" Gemma nodded.

"First time I even knew about her was when we went to Belfast to get Abel back."

"Gemma I'm sorry I didn't know." Gemma shrugged.

"No one did, does. I'd like to keep it that way."

"Of course."

"It was Clay who was here for me, for Jackson and Nicole when JT was off in Belfast with that gnash. Clay took care of all of us. JT had ripped me apart, left a whole in my heart a hole that Clay started to fill. It wasn't out of malice, we didn't mean it to happen but..."

"You started to fall in love." Tara spoke voicing Gemma's unspoken words.

"Yes." Gemma placed her hand on her hip and leaned closer in to Tara. "And these letters, they could stir up old ghosts. Everyone is in a good place Tara, we're whole again. Those letters could change that. Now I'm not sure what's in them but I do know that whatever is in those letters would be very painful for Jackson to read, or anyone for that matter. History is history for a reason Sweetheart."

Gemma hoped Tara understood her warning and hoped that she understood the consequences that could unravel if she decided to show those letters to anyone, especially Jax or Nicole. Gemma couldn't even bare to think about what would happen if they read them. Jax and Clay were finally back on track and this could set off all that again.

When Tara finally broke eye contact with her and returned her focus onto chopping the vegetables Gemma took the hint and returned to her own job knowing that this conversation was over, for the time being.

* * *

Gemma was in the kitchen putting the finishing touches to the desert- a deliciously naughty double chocolate cake topped with melted chocolate and fresh strawberries, Nicole's favourite-when she glanced at the clock. She expected Nicole to be here by now. She didn't expect her to muck in that was what Tara, Lyla and a couple of long standing sweetbutts were for, but she at least expected her to be there.

Most of the guys were there, some of them were even on there third beer and still no sign of her. Just as she was about to pitch a fit and grab Jax to go and find his wayword cousin she heard the sound of another motorbike approaching. Glancing out of the kitchen window she noticed that the bike she had heard had a passenger. _  
_

Gemma continued watching the two. Kozik parked his bike in formation with the others and then turned his attention towards Nicole as he helped her off his bike.

Gemma hadn't forgotten about the little bit of advice/threat she had made towards Kozik the day Nicole had disappeared. _Make her your Old Lady _andwatching the two of them interact Gemma wondered if he had actually taken on board what she had told him.

Nicole had no significant others, not to her knowledge anyway. Which meant she was free and single and if she was going to be staying around Gemma knew it wouldn't be long before she slotted right back into the place she had when she had left, except this time she hoped that her leading man wouldn't be a certain tattooed enforcer.

* * *

"Do I look hammered?"

"Nah sweetheart you look hot as always." Nicole playfully slapped his arm as she turned away from him, her cheeks flushed from embarrassment.

They had spent most of the afternoon drinking, well more Nicole than him although she was pretty sure that he wouldn't be passing any breathalyser test right now. As well as drinking they had spent the afternoon talking, and Nicole had to admit she felt lighter. Although she hadn't gone into specifics she found it good talking to someone who had been there, someone who actually understood how it felt, understood the urges and how every day was a battle especially in the first the year of sobriety. She felt good.

"We better get inside before Gemma kills us, we're so late." She told him finally looking back at him.

"Yeah and we wouldn't want to upset the queen."

"You do realise that is like the forth time today you've rolled your eyes when we've talked about Gemma today." She had ignored it the first time but when he scowled the second and third time when she mentioned Gemma she quickly realised that everything was not what it seemed and she was intrigued, maybe it was the drink but she really wanted to know. "So..you hate Gemma or something?"

"Nah it's nothing like that." Kozik had made a promise to himself not to tell her about what Gemma had said to him. She didn't need to know, and he wasn't going to budge on that.

"What then it's obviously something..." Nicole reached out and cupped his face in her hands, squeezing his cheeks. "Pllllleeeeeaaassseeee."

Kozik couldn't help but laugh, her pout was adorable. But still he'd made a promise with himself. Wrapping his hands around her wrists he carefully pulled her hands from his face.

"No. Now come on you need to eat." He kept hold of her one hand and started leading her towards the house.

"Why I'm fine..."

"Your drunk." Nicole came to an abrupt stop and tugged on his arm forcing him back to face her.

"You said I wasn't hammered." She pouted again, and again he couldn't help but smile at her. Taking a step closer to her, his free hand found way to her face.

"Sweetheart I said you didn't look hammered not that you weren't."

"And who's fault is that hmmm?" She asked both hand on her hips after freeing herself from his gentle hold. Shaking his head he laughed out loud. She was to funny.

"Come on." He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and led her toward the house.

* * *

"So getting my baby cousin dunk huh?" Kozik looked over his shoulder to find Jax standing in the kitchen doorway his arms folded across his chest and a frown on his face. He looked pissed. Kozik looked back at the fridge pulling out the beer he had been in the middle of getting. Uncapping the top he took a big swig of his beer to prepare himself for the ass kicking he knew he was about to get.

"Look man I just..." He was surprised when Jax's face broke into a smile. His head shaking as he walked closer.

"I'm just messing with you bro." Kozik breathed a sigh of relief. He wasn't going to get his ass kicked. "It's good to see her happy, hear her laugh it's been to long." He remarked leaning against the kitchen counter as Kozik went into the fridge to get another beer which he handed to Jax.

Kozik had to agree. Maybe it was all the Tequila but Nicole had been on top form tonight, she was the Nicole Teller they all knew and loved. It was a good sight to see.

"Yeah, she seems okay doesn't she?"

"Yeah." Jax glanced back towards the dining area as Nicole's laugh echoed throughout the room again quickly followed by others.

Kozik hated that he was about to ruin this little moment, pull Jax back into the brutal reality of the MC life but after his conversation with Nicole earlier he had no other choice. The shit Darby had spouted was now to close to home for comfort.

"You going to tell her about Daby?" Jax immediately returned his eyes to Kozik.

"She doesn't need to know any of that shit."

"What happens if he finds out she's back. You really think he won't come at her with that shit?" Jax shook his head before taking a quick pull from his beer before slamming it onto the counter making it spill. Although he didn't care, instead leaving the beer on the counter as he approached Kozik.

"He's goes near her I'll kill him." Kozik raised his hands showing he meant no threat. He was just concerned that the bullshit Darby had been saying was true and if it was Nicole was in danger if Darby found out she was here, Kozik just wanted to potect her.

"No harm meant bother. I just was thinking bout it."

"Yeah well don't and keep your mouth shut I don't want her to know."

"I wasn't planning on saying anything."

"Good." Jax backed off and went back to his beer.

"Hey promise me one thing tho." Jax looked at him surprised that Kozik had the cheek to ask him for something, but he nodded telling him to continue. "If you kill that son of a bitch. Make sure I'm there."

"Al'right."

"Hey." _Speak of the devil. _Nicole breezed into the kitchen placing the stack on dirty plates in the sink. "So you two having your own little party here, am I interrupting?" She teased looking between Jax and Kozik. Only to realise that she might have actually interrupted something. "What?"

"Nothing sweetheart." She looked at them both disbelievingly.

"So what we talking about then?" She quizzed taking Jax's beer out of his hand and stealing a quick drink before handing it back. She rolled her eyes when the remained silent. If they weren't going to tell her then she wasn't going to beg. "Well if your both finished talking about nothing then would you like to take your seats, cause I'm gonna serve up desert."

"Yes Mam." Jax and Kozik made their way out of the kitchen like they had been instructed to. But Kozik hung back for a minute.

"What we havin'?" Kozik asked generally curious, he'd always had a sweet tooth.

"Double chocolate cake with strawberries, and cream. My favourite." She gave him a wink and went back to getting the desert.

* * *

Tig tilted his chair back on two legs and he rubbed him stomach and burped.

"Jesus Tigger. Do you have any manners." Gemma scolded.

"Yeah I always try and let the lady cum first." He remarked with a wiggle of his brow.

"Hey there's kid here idiot." Opie growled from the other end of the table. His eyes glancing to Ellie, Piper and Kenny who were on the floor playing with Abel. Tig just shrugged completely ignorant to what he had said.

"You okay babe?" Tara tuned to look at Jax. She reached her hand up and traced her fingers across his lips and up his jaw line. She would never grow tired of looking into those eyes. She loved him more than she even thought possible and she could never imagine her life without him. Which is why she hadn't shown him those letters.

Her talk with Gemma had been interesting, Tara had no idea about that side of JT, she only knew him vaguely mainly what Jax had told her and recently from the letters she had read. She had never thought of it from Gemma's point of view how it must have hurt having your husband up and leave for weeks, months at a time. Leaving you to raise two kids, well three if you counted Nicole. She had experienced something similar these past 14 months but the difference her man hadn't chose to leave and she didn't have to try and look after a sick child.

Even considering all that, it didn't excuse Gemma or Clay's actions. JT spoke about how he feared that his days were numbered. He feared that his best fiend and his wife would be responsible for his demise. And it was those reasons that Tara had decided to keep the letters from Jax. She wanted out of this life, she didn't want her children brought up around such violence. And when Jax had opened up to her and confessed to her that he to wanted out she could barely contain her excitement. It was actually going to happen they were going to free of this town, free of the Club and Tara couldn't wait.

"I think we should tell them." She spoke so only Jax could hear her.

"Now." Tara eyes scanned the table before returning to his.

"Everyones here."

"Okay." He pulled her hand up to his face and kissed her knuckles, a smile stretching across his face. Tara removed her engagement ring from her back pocket and placed it on her wedding finger.

"Hey..." Jax stood to his feet, all eyes now on him. As he looked around the the table he knew that all his brothers knew what he was about to announce. "I have an ann..." His speech was interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Hold that thought." Gemma got to her feet, and headed for the door, making sure she lightly squeezed Tara's shoulder as she passed her.

Nicole-along with the others-knew exactly what Jax was about to say and she couldn't have been happier for the two of them. If anyone deserved to be happy it was Jax. Looking around the rest of her family they to looked like they couldn't be happier for their brother.

But before her eyes returned to Jax she caught Happy staring at her. He was sat next to a blonde sweetbutt-who Gemma had invited along with a couple of others- Nicole didn't mind to much-even if she did believe Gemma had invited them on purpose and seated them next to Happy on purpose-because the ones that were invited were long standing sweetbutts and they actually weren't that bad. For example Happy's arm was draped on the back of her chair but instead of being all over him like the sweetbutts would have been at the clubhouse she was now talking to Bobby and one of the other girls while they waitied for Gemma to return. Not that Nicole thought it would have made much difference if she had been trying to get closer to Happy because he hadn't being paying her any attention all night, instead Nicole had caught him more than once staring at her. Not that she could talk she had found it very hard to keep her eyes off him just like now.

She hadn't spoken to him since the other morning. The morning where his body had practically been touching hers, the morning where Nicole would have taken him right there and then, if they hadn't been interrupted.

She had forgotten how much he managed to get underneath her skin. And as she continued to stare at him, her mind clouded we thoughts of exactly how those lips felt on hers as well as the memory of how good it felt having the weight of his body on top of hers. She could feel her cheeks burn and judging by the small cocky grin on his face he knew exactly what she was thinking.

Nicole knew she shouldn't be looking at him like that. But as his stare got harder, darker she also knew that she wasn't going to be able to stop it.

"Who are you?" Clay's questioned. Nicole pulled her hair over her one shoulder and finally pulled her eyes from his as Clay's voice brought her from her inappropriate thoughts. Picking up her beer and taking a much needed swig she turned to take a look at who Clay was referring to, and when she saw him standing there Nicole almost chocked.

"Liam." Nicole croaked he hand wiping the spilled beer from her chin.

"You know this guy?" Nicole looked at Jax. _Fuck._ She knew he was going to freak.

"She should apparently he's her fiancé." Gemma announced and Nicole felt every set of eyes land on her. _Oh shit._


	12. Chapter 12

Everything Changes 

Chapter Twelve 

Nicole paced the floor of her bedroom, one hand on her hip and the other nervously playing with her necklace. Catching sight of Liam sitting on her bed, her childhood bed only made this situation more weird.

She knew this day would come but not now, not like this.

Everything was so messed up and it was all her fault yet again. It was like the only thing she was good at was screwing up.

"Sweets..." Hearing him say that made her stop in her tracks. She couldn't explain why but she was suddenly so angry with him.

"What the hell are you doing here Liam?" Okay she knew she shouldn't really be angry at him, but he had promised her that he would let her do this alone but it hadn't. He had just turned up revealing her secrets to her whole family. None of this was good.

"You didn't answer any of my calls or texts Nicole. I was worried." Nicole shook her head turning her back on him, how had she let this happen. "What was I supposed to do?" He reached for but as soon as Nicole felt his hand on her she flinched away. Realising what she had done Nicole spun round to face him. She registered his hurt and confusion in his eyes. She was a fucking bitch. She shouldn't be angry at him none of this was his fault. "I just needed to see you Nic. I was worried." Swallowing her anger she closed the gap between them and rested her hand on his cheek.

"I know you were and I'm sorry for ignoring your calls I shouldn't have done that, it wasn't fair on you. But I have to ask Liam, how the hell did you know where to find me?"

"Well like I said I was worried so I rang the car hire company they told me that you had given this address and phone number as your contact info." She rubbed her hand over her forehead, feeling the headache coming on. She hadn't given it a second thought when she paid for the car on his credit card, it was a force of habit, but she should have known that doing that he would be able to access the information, but then again she never thought he would come for her.

"You shouldn't have come here Liam."

"You up and leave telling me that you need to go and visit your family, the same family you haven't spoken to in the whole time I've known you. Then when I have tried to call you, you don't answer me, what the hell was I supposed to do, I was worried something bad had happened. I had to make sure you were safe and I am not going to apologise for that, so don't ask me to." He ran his hand over his face. "What the hell is going on Nic?"

"I...I..Liam you shouldn't have come here not like this." She felt the tears burn in the back of her eyes.

"Shit you haven't told them that we're engaged, do they even know who I am?" Unable to answer him, or look at him Nicole just shook her head in response. The tears she felt burn in her eyes finally fell when she heard him let out shuddered breath followed by a flow of almost unrecognizable curses. He was mad and mad was something Liam didn't do, he was usually so placid always took things in his stride but this was obviously not one of those things and Nicole could understand why and she was pretty sure that her whole family that were probably still sat around the table trying to figure out what was going on felt exactly the same as Liam.

Liam watched as Nicole started to breakdown in front of him. He had absolutely no idea what the hell was going on. He had come to Charming with an idea of what he might have been walking in on, but when the cab had pulled up outside the address he had given him Liam had thought the cab driver had taken a wrong turn somewhere, because what he was seeing was nothing like he had imagined. Outside the house was a row of Motorcycles. He doubled checked the number on the door against the information on the piece of paper and realised that he was in fact in the right place. And if he had been worried by the view outside then the view that had greeted him inside terrified him. Sat around a large table were about 10 men all wearing matching leather vests and menacing stares and tucked right in the middle of all them was his Nicole. Seeing her among those men was all wrong to him. There was noway his girl was part of a social circle like that, she didn't fit not to him anyway and when he realised that Nicole hadn't told her so called family about him, he wondered if she thought he didn't fit.

"Are you ashamed of me?"

"What no, of course not." She tried to reach out for him but this time he stepped away from her. "Liam it's not like that." He ignored the upset look on her face. He needed some answers right now because he just didn't get any of it.

"Then what is it like Nic?" Nicole cringed at his raised voice. "I have tried to be so patient with you..." Liam ranted. "I understand you have issues, that you have this guard up..."

"I don't..." She cut in, in an attempt to try and defend herself, even though she knew he was right. But if she wasn't willing to admit it to herself then she wasn't about to let some else call her up on her shit.

"Yes you do, trust me...Why didn't you tell me about them?" He pointed over her shoulder and Nicole knew that he was referring to her family.

"I..I don't know." She could feel herself getting flustered. She wasn't expecting this meaning she didn't know what to say to him. She couldn't be completely truthful with him because she had told him so many lies already. But she had to tell him something that would hopefully make everything alright with him. But before she could say anything Liam started again.

"You know I actually started believing that this was it, that you really wanted us, but now..."

"Liam please..."

"You haven't even told them I exist Nicole." Liam shouted. He watched more of her tears fall and as much as he wanted to pull her into his arms and tell it was all okay he couldn't. He had always had doubts about how committed she was to their relationship and unfortunately he was starting to get the distinct feeling that she had come here to leave him. he sat back down on her bed as he couldn't stand any longer, especially as the thought of her leaving him made him sick to his stomach.

Nicole wiped away her tears and watched Liam collapse onto her bed his head buried in his hands. He looked so sad and it was all her fault. She didn't want to hurt him.

"Are you leaving me?" His question completely knocked the wind out of her, but for many different reasons.

When she had made up her mind to come back to Charming, leaving him had never entered her mind but as soon as she stepped back into her old life she had to admit that she knew Liam wouldn't fit in it. He was to different, he would never grasp this life, the MC way. He wasn't built for it and that was fine. Maybe if she hadn't had the conversation with Jax about the Russians and the new Cartel deal the fact that Liam didn't fit would have been a problem, because she did fit in this life no matter how hard she had tried to fight it sometimes. But that conversation had defiantly made her mind up about one thing. She couldn't stay in Charming. Which meant that her place was with Liam in LA, no matter what her heart was saying.

Kneeling in front of him she ran her hands up his thighs, her hands rubbing back and forth until he finally looked at her from behind his hands. This was a trick Nicole had become pretty good at during their relationship. Whenever anything got to difficult for her, or when he stated asking to many questions she would use sex as a distraction. And right now both of them needed it. Everything would still be there in the morning but this would give Nicole a chance to think about how she was going to handle all this, not just Liam but her family to.

Taking his one hand in hers, she placed kisses on the palm before repeating this action on his other hand.

"I want you." She spoke slowly and firmly. Pushing herself up she brushed her lips against his before speaking the words she knew he wanted to hear, the words that would assure him that she wasn't leaving him. "I love you." He stilled and for a moment Nicole thought she had gone to far but when his knuckles brushed over her cheek and he told her that he loved her to, she knew it was working.

His fingers trailed down her back making her arch against him and before she could think about all the shit that had just gone done, if this was really was what she wanted Liam's hands hoisted her up so that she was straddling him. His lips then left hers and he started trailing kisses down her throat. Her eyes closed and her mouth suddenly became dry. The familiar feeling in her lower parts were a welcome distraction, this was exactly what she needed. What they both needed.

She did love him, what was not to love he was so good to her and he was really in love with her, she could see it his eyes. She could do this._  
_

* * *

"Did you know about this?" Jax shook in his head in answer to his mothers question. His eyes remained glued to the door where Nicole had ushered Liam into. Shaking a cigarette from his pack Jax placed it between his lips as he searched his pockets for a light. He remembered seeing Liam flash up on her phone the other morning but Nicole had told him it was her boss, not her Fiancé . And the fact that she lied to his face troubled him.

He cast his eyes around the table. Everyone seemed a little unsettled by the announcement- Jax had to think how ironic it was, he had just been about to announce his own engagement to his brothers when Nicole's supposed Fiancé walked into the room. It was just fucking weird-His eyes caught Clay's who looked just as apprehensive as he felt.

"We're gonna head out, if that's al'right?" Jax tore his eyes away from his stepfather to look up at Opie who had Lyla tucked underneath his arm a sleeping Piper on her hip.

"Yeah sure bro."

"Talk tomorrow, fill me in on this shit. Oh and congrats man." Opie laid his hand on Jax's shoulder. Jax nodded and finally lit his cigarette.

The rest of his brothers took Opie's leaving as their cue. Jax along with Clay started showing their brothers out. Normally they weren't so formal but both men just wanted something to do until Nicole came out and told them what the hell was going on.

Happy reluctantly got to his feet to follow his brothers out. _Fiancé_ what the fuck he never noticed a ring on her, in fact he'd stake his life on it that she hadn't been wearing one since her return to Charming. He didn't like this shit, if she was hiding this asshole from her family then she was hiding him for a reason.

After shaking hands with Clay he moved to Jax. His hand was outstretched when the deep male voice rang throughout the now quiet house. His jaw flexed, knowing that the shouts were coming from the man Nicole was currently hauled up in her room with. He didn't like that, and by the looks of it neither did Clay who raised an eyebrow to Gemma as she started to walk towards the room, but Happy was surprised when her attempts were stopped by Jax.

"Mom leave them alone." Happy had to stop himself form shooting a look at his VP. If that was his baby cousin trapped inside a room with a man none of them knew and there were raised voices he would have been in that room in a second. But Nicole wasn't his. She was Jax's responsibility and if this was his decision Happy had no other choice than to accept that right now. Even if it did piss him off.

So Happy shook hands with his VP and went on his way.

* * *

Nicole slipped out from beneath the sheets careful not to wake the sleeping body next to her. _12.02am._

Picking up his discarded white shirt she pulled it on and started buttoning it up when the sparkler on her left hand caught her eye as it reflected in the glow of the moonlight that was seeping through her bedroom window.

As they lay in bed after some makeup sex Liam noticed that she was missing a very important piece of jewellery. Again she made her apologies and quickly got out of bed and went over to her bag which she had placed in the room earlier and pulled out the ring, but before she could put it on her finger Liam took over. Taking her hand he pulled her back onto the bed and slowly slid the ring onto her slender finger as he kissed his way up her arm. Before Nicole knew it she was trapped underneath his muscular frame as he took charge, making her his.

Nicole had just closed her eyes and let him dominate her body, it hadn't been the first time she had done this, but this time she had no fear. Liam would never hurt her, but even so it was that thought, those memories that had her leaving him alone in her bed. She had no idea what she felt at this point. How did she always seem to make her life so complicated.

Making her way through the darkness she headed for the kitchen. She was glad no one had come to her room because she really didn't want to deal with anyone, she didn't want to have to explain. She knew there would be some sort of consequences for not telling them, he was an outsider and she had just let him walk into their lives. They were unprepared, had no knowledge of who he was or where he came from and if the Sons always prided themselves on something other than fierce loyalty it was always being prepared, so they were defiantly going to be pissed with her.

Although it didn't really matter what they thought because she was leaving anyway.

She was about to open the door to the fridge when the flicker of light coming from the corner of the room made her jump. As the light disappeared, and was replaced with just the red glow of cigarette Nicole knew exactly who it was sitting in the dark. Shaking it off she opened the fridge, but instead of grabbing the bottle of water like she originally planned she pulled out two beers instead.

Opening both bottles she placed one in front of Jax and took the seat across from him. Neither one of them said a word, both were waiting for the other to start this conversation.

Although they were sat in darkness Jax could still make her out, could make out the she was dressed in his shirt, could make the diamond ring now on her ring finger and could make out the glint of tears in her eyes. It wasn't the fact she was engaged to some guy that was pissing him off, it was the fact that she hadn't told him, and he had a feeling she wasn't going to tell him any time soon. Maybe it was past history making his mood worse, the last boyfriend she had picked for herself- a Son no less- thought it was a good idea to use her as a punch bag, so it was only natural of him to be a little weary especially as he knew fuck all about this guy.

"Can I have one of those?" She asked pointing to the cigarette currently hanging from his mouth. Jax pulled out his smokes and his lighter and slid them across the table to her. "Thanks."

"Thought Liam was your boss?" Jax asked finally starting the inevitable conversion that was looming between them.

"He is." She took a swig of her beer and lit up her cigarette before starting. She wasn't going to give Jax the chance to try and get into her head. "The bar I told you I run he owns it, several actually." Another swig of beer. "Look Jay I'm sorry I never told you about him the fact that I'm engaged..."

"Why didn't you Nic, seems like you've got something to hide." Nicole rolled her eyes. _If only he knew how true that was._ But the secrets she was hiding had nothing to do with Liam, in fact he was probably the only good thing to happen to her since she left Charming 14 months ago. "He take advantage of you?"

"What?"

"He's your boss Nic. I know how that shit works, Older guy, young vulnerable girl, working late together..."

"Jesus Christ Jay." She shook her head. Why did he always jump to that shit. Liam had never treated her with anything but respect. " It's wasn't like that. He never took advantage of me, not once. And for your information he's like two years older than you." There was more of an age gap between her and Happy but Jax didn't need to know that.

"Then why were you keeping this shit from everyone?" Jax leaned forward his arms coming to rest of the table. "Why didn't you tell me?" Nicole shrugged taking another long drag of her cigarette. Truth was she had no clue as to why she was keeping Liam a secret. Jax studied her as she avoided looking at him. Something wasn't right, he couldn't put his finger on it but she was keeping something to herself.

"So..." He drawled leaning back in his chair and taking a drag of his own cigarette. "It must be pretty serious if your gonna marry him." She answered with another shrug of her shoulders. _Something is off. _"You love him?" Finally she was looking at him again.

"What?"

"It's a simple question Nic. Do you love him?" A few hours ago she had spoken those three little words to Liam. And she meant them, because she was going to marry that man, make a life with him but now she found herself unable to say them. "Nic..."

"I'm not doing this." She snapped a little to quickly making Jax raise his brow. Nicole got to her feet with the full intention of storming back to her room, but Jax had other ideas.

He didn't like how she was avoiding his questions. And he didn't like how she was fidgeting beneath his gaze. It was like she was hiding something but what? Was it him, Liam. Was she keeping secrets about him, or was she hiding her own secrets. He hoped to god that she wasn't.

Nicole felt herself spin round and come face to face with Jax. His eyes were darting over her face and she knew he trying to figure her out, figure out why she couldn't even answer a stupid question.

"Nic, you know we all love you right, no matter what." _What the hell. _She was expecting that, she was expecting him to ask her again, shout at her even, not to speak to her so softly, because 5 seconds ago he looked pissed. "Your family Nic."

"I know."

"If this is what you want, if that guy is we will all support you. But if he isn't..."

"He is." Jax wanted to believe her he really did, but there was something in her eyes that was telling him differently. However it was late and she looked tired and even if he locked her in a room and tried to get her to tell him what the hell was going on he knew she wouldn't break because Nicole only told you something when she ready. So he would just have to wait it out bit. Although he hoped that he wouldn't have to wait to long.

"Come on you should get some sleep, it's been a long day." He said as he let go of her arm and draped his arm over her shoulder leading her towards her bedroom.

"Tell me about it." She smirked. "So is Gemma pissed?"

"When isn't my mother pissed?" Jax scoffed as the stopped outside her room.

"True." Jax gave her a lopsided grin before dropping a kiss onto her forehead.

"I'll see you in the morning."

"Yeah." Jax turned on his heels and started making his way down the hall when Nicole called him back. "Sorry I didn't tell you."

"No more secrets al'right."

"I'll do my best." Jax watched with a knitted brow as she disappeared into her room. _What the hell is that meant to mean._


	13. Chapter 13

Everything Changes 

Chapter Thirteen 

"Hmmm...Morning..." Liam mumbled as he turned towards Nicole, throwing his arm over her stomach and pulling her closer.

"Morning."

"What are you doing?" He asked noticing the phone in her hand.

"I'm looking for a flight out today, there's one at 12, we could probably make that. What do you think?" Nicole looked away from iphone at Liam. "What?" She asked noting his frown.

"Well." He shifted so that he was now sitting level with her. "I think we should stay. For a bit anyway."

"Liam..." Nicole sighed. But before she could tell him how much of a bad idea it was to stay in Charming- especially for the sake of their relationship- he cut her off.

"I know I was a little angry last night but sweets, you dropped everything to come running back to your family even though you hadn't spoken to them in months. They obviously mean a lot to you, and if their important to you then their important to me." Most girls would love nothing more than to hear that from their future husband, but the thing was her family wasn't exactly normal.

When she had first met Liam's parents she had been as nervous as hell, she didn't really have much experience when it came to meeting boyfriends parents. In fact her only experience of meeting a boyfriends parent was when she was dating Michael Darby and, well, that didn't exactly go well on either side. In fact it had gone so badly that Ernest Darby- Michael's father- was the person she ran to when she wanted to end her life, positive that he would do the job. It was a big surprise when he didn't but now she knew exactly why he had said no. She just didn't see it at the time.

So in actual fact her meeting with Liam's parents had gone pretty well, even considering the fact they had been looking down at her and his mother had made it pretty clear that she thought that Nicole wasn't good enough for her son.

She remembered how apologetic Liam had been after, telling her to ignore his mother. If he thought his mother had been bad then he had no idea what he was about to let himself in for.

"And again I love you for that but...but my family...their not exactly..." She tried to find the right words.

"Normal?" Nicole stared at him blankly. "Come on I saw the bikes out front and the matching vests they were all wearing."

"So what?" Liam realised that he had put his foot in it and quickly tried to fix it.

"I didn't mean anything by it. I was just saying."

"Well don't. Yes they may not be what society classes as normal but their my family and their normal to me."

"I'm sorry." He pressed a light kiss on her cheek.

"No." She shook her head. "No I'm sorry." She shifted her body so she was facing him. "I'm just..this is a lot for me."

"I know." He brushed a piece hair from her face. "I know." He repeated before leaning in and kissing her on the lips.

"Okay."Nicole spoke as she pulled back and rested her forehead against his. Liam kissed her again, and this time she couldn't help but kiss him back.

"So we're staying then?" No Nicole wanted to scream but Liam was right he did need to meet them spend a little with them because she knew her family wouldn't just let her up and leave with someone they didn't know. So even though she was dreading it she had no other choice but to agree to staying.

"Just a few days." Liam smiled that gorgeous smile that had attracted her to him the first time they'd met. Flipping her so she was now lying beneath him he kissed her again, and again and she didn't stop him.

"So..the..motorbikes..the..vests..." He said in-between placing kisses on her lips, her jawline and down her neck. "Is your...family...part...of...a...gang?"

"There a club not a gang." Liam stopped kissing her and laughed which surprised her, she wasn't expecting that reaction.

"Oh my god, I was just joking. Christ Nic, a gang." She was glad that he didn't sound pissed at her confession but at the same time they weren't a gang.

"There a club seriously if you want to survive these couple days then I suggest that you do not call them a gang."

"Okay, note to self do not call them a gang." Nicole nodded, as Liam dropped another kiss onto her lips. "So are there any other rules I should know about?" Nicole wrapped her arms around his neck pulling his face closer.

"You have no idea."

* * *

Nicole was in the middle of making pancakes for herself and Liam when she heard the familiar click of heels making their way towards the kitchen. _Here we go. _Placing the bowl of batter on the counter Nicole turned to face her Aunt. She looked pissed more pissed than she had last night when she not so subtly introduced Liam, her Fiancé to the whole room, and that made Nicole just as pissed as Gemma. Leaning against the counter Nicole folded her arms across her chest and pouted like a stubborn little child, while Gemma had her hands on her hips, and a scowl on her face, like she'd just sucked on a lemon.

"You ever going to tell us?" Gemma started.

"Yes."

"Liar."

"Believe what you like Gemma."

"You would never tell us and you know why?" Gemma stepped forward as Nicole turned away from her and went back to beating the batter.

Gemma of course had been shocked and pissed at the same time, just like everyone else had been to find out about Liam. It would have been a big enough shock to hear from Nicole but to find out by having her Fiancé show up on the door was insulting. Gemma was more than ready to fly at Nicole and her so called Fiancé there and then, but Nicole had acted so quickly and was dragging Liam away from them before anyone could even register it. And then it had been Jax who had stopped her from going into the room. But now here she was and there was no one to stop her from saying what needed to be said.

"No, but I'm sure you're going to tell me." Nicole snarked.

"Your not in love with him." Gemma smirked watching Nicole's body stiffen as the rhythm of her beating slowed. She was right.

"You don't know what your talking about."

"You thought your life here was over, so you made a new one for yourself. I get that." Nicole looked sideways at Gemma who was now leaning her hip against the counter next to her. "But now you know about Jackson, and now your back, your new life doesn't fit..."

_How does she do it._ Gemma always had a way of knowing exactly what was going on and now was no different. What she had just said was exactly the inner fight Nicole was having with herself. Liam didn't fit, LA didn't fit. But neither did Charming, not now, not after finding out that they were now working with the Gallindo Cartel. Nicole had to do what she had to do and right now that was to get the hell out of Charming.

"I'm not back Gemma." Nicole turned so that she was facing Gemma again.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's means I'm staying for another couple of days then I'm gone. I'm going back to LA Gemma, and I am going to marry the man I love. Now you can either be a part of that or not, that's your choice." Nicole thought she sounded confident but the smirk gracing Gemma face told her different.

"The man you love. Darlin' I'll give you the boy is pretty but he ain't the man you love."

"Really, so who is it that I love Gemma. As you seem to know everything." Gemma's smirk grew as the gap between them lessened.

"A Son."

"A Son?" Nicole scoffed trying to pretend that Gemma wasn't right.

"A Son."

"And who is this Son you seem to think I love Gemma?"

"Kozik. I saw you two yesterday. Looked pretty cosy."

"Koz, seriously? Well you've certainly changed your tune."The thought of losing Nicole again was something Gemma didn't want to happen. Watching her family last night together as one, reminded Gemma how much she had missed it, missed her family being whole and she wasn't about to sit back and let her family fall apart again. Nicole was staying whether she liked it or not. On the other hand though as much as she wanted her to stay, she wasn't about to let her fall completely back into her old ways. Her old ways mainly being Happy.

THe two hadn't spoke much last night but Gemma hadn't missed the looks they had been exchanging all night. They wanted one another it was obvious. Even though Gemma had gone to the lengths of inviting Carrie. Carrie was an old favorite of Happy's, the two had hooked up on various occasions when Happy was a Nomad and visiting Charming and Gemma hoped to reignite some of those sparks because according to Carrie from an earlier conversation it had been a while since the two had hooked up. But Gemma's plan had backed fired. Carrie had been nothing but respectful all night, she kept her hands to herself and only interacted with Happy when she asked him to pass the potatoes and it pissed Gemma off. Under normal circumstances she would have been pleased with the sweetbutts behavior but not last night. Gemma wanted Nicole to see that Happy wasn't a man who you could have something serious with someone, he was a hit it and leave kind of guy, and that was fine but when the girl in question was Nicole Gemma didn't like the thought of that. Jax was not the only one who was the future of Samcro, Nicole was to. She had her on little role to play and it wasn't that of a whore. She needed her own old man. Which is the reason Gemma was contemplating that ultimatum she had made to Kozik 14 months ago back into action. He was a perfect choice and there was clearly something between them or Kozik would never have risked his balls by sleeping with Nicole when she was just 16.

"Well the more I thought about it more I realised that he would actually be good Old Man material."

"Yeah he would but me and Kozik are not going to happen." Nicole had had enough of this conversation and decided to turn her attention back to making the pancakes she had be preparing before the Gemma interrogation started.

"It already has sweetheart." Nicole snapped her head back at Gemma.

"That was a long time ago."

"Well I can't help it if I look at you two and see chemistry." Nicole shook he head, her Aunt was unbelievable.

"Your seeing what you want to see. Me and Kozik are just friends. Now can we drop this please."

"This to do with Happy?"

"Jesus Gemma." Nicole snapped banging the whisk onto the counter.

"What? The way you two were eye fucking eachother last night what am I supposed to think." Nicole bit her lip and diverted her eyes from Gemma's. She couldn't deny Gemma's accusations because she was right. She hadn't been able to keep her eyes of him and neither had he. "You know that shit is bad news."

"There is nothing between me and Happy, it's over..." Nicole felt the lump in her throat she really didn't want to go there.

"It wasn't exactly a choice." Gemma knew that the only reason whatever it was Happy and Nicole had was over was because Nicole thought he was going to be the one who killed Jax.

"Gemma please just dr..." Nicole stopped and glanced over her shoulder when she heard someone clear their throat. She was horrified to see Liam standing there. He was wearing his jeans, but was shirtless- not surprising considering she was wearing his shirt-but even though his perfectly toned abs were on show Nicole could only look at his face. She had no idea how long he had been there or how much he had heard she just prayed to god he hadn't heard Gemma's last comment. His face was giving nothing away.

"Morning. Sleep well?" Gemma asked before Nicole could even get her mouth and brain to function.

"Yes very well thankyou Mrs Morrow." Gemma smirked the boy actually had manners a rarity around Samcro. "I was actually just wondering if it would be okay if I used the shower."

"Sure second door on the left, there are already clean towels out. And it's Gemma, Mrs Morrow makes me feel old."

"Thank you..Gemma." Liam answered with that famous smile of his, that even made Gemma smile back at him.

"Pancakes will be ready in bout 15 minutes." Nicole told him as she walked over to him and lent on her tiptoes to drop a kiss onto his cheek. "You okay?"

"Yeah." Nicole looked at him still trying to register a reaction from him hoping to know if he had heard or not but again he was giving nothing away. He even turned his head so her lips landed on his instead of his cheek. "I'll be out in time for breakfast."

"Okay." Nicole watched him walk down the hall until he disappeared into the bathroom. Knowing that her conversation with Nicole was now officially over Gemma walked over to the kitchen table, grabbing her bag that was hanging off the back of the chair when Nicole turned to face her.

"I'm going to see Otto. Clay and Jax are at the club. You should head over there some time today. Clay would like a word."

"Another lecture." Nicole remarked bitterly. Gemma scoffed strutting over to her.

"Look sweetheart whether you want to be or not you are part of this family. And we look out for family."

"Don't give me that bullshit this has nothing to do with protecting me this is about you..."

"No, I'm trying to protect you from making the biggest mistake of your life."

"Happy?"

"Yes. Last time all he did was use you like a whore. You need an Old man."

"No I don't. I'm not staying here Gemma, I'm leaving and I'm marrying Liam."

"We'll see."Gemma headed for the door before taking one last look over her shoulder at her niece. "Make sure you go and see Clay."

Gemma walked out to her car, pleased by what had just happened. Nicole was stubborn so she wasn't shocked by her resilience, Gemma had expected the fight. But what she hadn't expected and what had placed the smug smile on her face was the fact that Liam had overheard their conversation. She wasn't sure how much he had heard but if he had heard the part about Happy and Kozik which she would bet her life that he had then Gemma knew it was only a matter of time before jealously and doubt started clouding his mind, leaving her to think that maybe this-getting Nicole to stay-wasn't going to be as hard as she originally thought.

* * *

Nicole was in middle of getting dressed when he finally spoke. During breakfast he hadn't said anything other than the odd yes or no. He had heard something she was sure of it, it was the only thing that explained the way he was acting. And if she was still unsure then the words he spoke next definitely confirmed it.

"There's that bachelor party booked in at the club in a couple of days." Nicole nodded remembering making the booking herself. "I'm not sure Claire's up for handling it alone." He said casually as he fished buttoning up his shirt. "I think your right we should head back."

"Now." Liam shrugged his back still to her.

"Tomorrow at the latest." He turned to look at her, the determination clear on his face.

Liam couldn't help but overhear the conversation taking place between Nicole and the woman he gathered to be her Aunt. He was going to turn back on himself and leave them to their obviously private talk, when something her Aunt said caught his attention.

_"This to do with Happy?"_

_"Jesus Gemma._"

_"What? The way you two were eye fucking eachother last night what am I supposed to think-_

_-You know that shit is bad news."_

He stopped and turned around waiting with baited breath to hear what his Fiancés reply would be. It felt like a life time before Nicole answered.

"_There is nothing between me and Happy, it's over..."_

He should have been relieved but there was something in way she had said it, she sounded sad. Like she was upset that whatever it was that she had with this _Happy_ person was over, and then Gemma said something had made his stomach drop.

_"It wasn't exactly a choice."_

He loved Nicole more than anything, when he had told her that he wanted to meet her family because if they meant something to her then they did to him, he wasn't lying. But now...after what he had just heard he didn't want to stay or rather he didn't want her to. He didn't want her around this Happy character. It sounded like they had history, history that also sounded like it wasn't over. And Liam couldn't, no he wouldn't lose her.

"Mr. Alan is a big client I just want to make sure it all runs smoothly. I know I said we should stay but I completely forgot until I checked my schedule this morning. But I promise I still want to get to know your family. Maybe we invite your Uncle and Aunt and Jax to the house for a weekend."

Even though his arms were now wrapped around her and he had a smile on his face Nicole knew what he was doing and why all of a sudden he had remembered about this event. He had heard and now he was worried, she could see it in his eyes, he was worried that if they stayed he would lose and if she was completely honest with herself she knew he would.

But Nicole wanted out of Charming and now that Liam was on the same page, she wasn't going to argue with him on this.

"Okay, I'll make the arrangements get us booked on a flight out of here tomorrow." He bent down and kissed her. His kiss rougher, more needing than normal. Again she wasn't going to stop him.

"I love you." He whispered against her lips.

"I love you to." She pressed her lips back to his and closed her eyes trying to stop her mind wondering elsewhere. _  
_


	14. Chapter 14

Everything Changes

Chapter Fourteen

Clay paced the floor of the small garage office in a rage. He had just come to check over the schedule for the day but instead he ended up being threatened, making his already bad morning even worse.

Piney had strolled into the office like he owned the place and then proceeded to threaten him. Using information he thought he knew, information about JT that could only come from one person, one thing. Tara and those damn letters. _Seemed like Gemma had a right to be worried_. Piney gave him to the end of the week to kill the Cartel deal or apparently he was going to go public with the shit he thought he knew. And as if Piney had read his murderous thoughts he told him that if he tried anything that Piney had contingencies in place. Clay knew that he needed to find those letters and destroy them. And he knew the exact person who could help him.

* * *

Unser sat back in the carved out chair he had made himself, as he watched the flames ignite in the pit in front of him. He was bone tired, and it wasn't just because of the rounds of Chemo he'd had yesterday, the reason he was so tired was because he had spent the night and the early hours of the morning reading and re-reading those letters that Gemma had asked him to retrieve from Tara's office. He knew the letters weren't going to make for easy reading but he never expected to read what he had.

When Gemma had expressed how worried she was about these letters and the damage it could cause he just presumed that she was over dramatising in the way only Gemma Teller could. But she had every right to be worried the things written in those letters could ruin the Teller family and tear the club apart at the same time.

He was brought from the memories of what he had read when he heard the now unwelcome rumble of an all to familiar Harley.

He watched Clay dismount his bike and Unser couldn't stop the disgust from creeping onto his face, now seeing the Samcro President in a new light.

Clay was confused by the look that was currently gracing the old Chief's face. He knew he hadn't been to visit as much as he should have but shit he had other more pressing problems to deal with– one of those pressing issues being the reason he was here in the first place- so Unser would just have to get over his little tantrum he looked like he was about to throw.

Walking over to him Clay started removing his sunglasses when he noticed Unser pick up a pile of papers and throw them onto the fire.

It took only a spilt second to put everything together. Running over to the fire he reached into flames, not caring if he got burnt, and pulled out the papers, throwing them to the ground before stomping his heavy boot all over them in an attempt to kill the flames.

Once the flames were out Clay picked up the now slightly chard letters only to realise that he was right and the papers that Unser was about to burn were none other than the letters that Piney had threatened him with a little over an hour ago.

"How did you get these?" Clay seethed. "How did you even know about them?"

"I wish I didn't know." He may not of answered him but Clay didn't need him to, this had his Old Lady written all over it.

"Gemma wanted these."

"She was afraid that what was inside could hurt Jax and she was right. I read them Clay, and I can tell you the lies you spun me were easier to stomach." Unser paced the floor beneath him watching as Clay flicked through the papers. Unser didn't miss that Clay didn't even show a once of emotion as he went through the letters.

"Save the pain and sorrow for my Old Lady."

"That's the difference between you and me Clay I actually feel bad for some of the bad shit I've done. Lie you fed me about John Teller needing to die."

"That wasn't a lie." Clay snapped.

"You told me JT's weakness was going to bring violence to Charming. War brewing with the Mayans."

"That was true."

"Not according to those letters. JT wasn't weak he was conflicted. He wanted to end guns go legit. That's why you killed him, had me cover it up."

"The only thing I ever asked you to do was to lose a bit of paperwork, to protect my club your town. I don't regret that." Clay snapped stepping into Unser's personal space.

"JT thought that you made two attempts to kill him. Christ Nicole was with him the second time, in the truck that the brakes failed on. Details are in there. You regret that?" He watched Clay stiffen, and even though he tried to hide it Unser knew what he saw.

"That's was a mistake." Clay mumbled.

He had tampered with brake line on the JT's old truck, thought it would be less obvious, the thing was a pile of shit and was just about ready to give out. Which is why John was the only one to drive it and why he never let Jax or Nicole ride in it with him. But that day was different. Gemma had an emergency and couldn't pick Nicole up from school. Not wanting her on the back of his bike, John made the decision to break his rule and took the truck to pick her up. When Clay found out he tried everything he could to put a stop to it, but his efforts were useless. That day Clay actual prayed to the big man upstairs not to let anything happen. And thankfully the big man listened.

"What cutting the brake line or Nicole being there?"

"He wasn't supposed to go get her..." Clay shouted. Unser actually took a step back. Hearing Clay practically admit it made it all feel to real.

"Jesus." Unser ran his hand over his face. This was too much. "And what about Gemma?" Unser looked back at Clay. "Does she know the real reason why you killed her Old man?" Having enough Clay decided to end this conversation. He stepped closer to Unser.

"What's a matter Chief afraid the love of your life betrayed you to?" Clay threw the papers back onto the fire. Looking back at Unser who was now sitting on the step to his trailer. "Those are copies the originals are still out there."

"I searched her whole office those were in Tara's desk draw. All she had."

"I need those originals."

"What are you going to do?" Unser asked as Clay cocked his leg over his bike.

"Protect my family." Unser did not like the sound of that.

* * *

Nicole was on her way to T/M alone. She had finally managed to talk Liam into letting her go. Although he hadn't come right out with it she knew that he didn't want her going to there alone, she also knew that the reason for his resistance in letting her go was because of what he had overheard this morning. _Damn Gemma._

However knowing that Liam wasn't the type of jackass to order her not to go, she played on that and as always she ended up getting her own way.

The reason she was heading to T/M was because Gemma had told her that Clay wanted to talk to her and as much as she would rather not listen to another lecture she thought it would be best just to get it over and done with.

Pulling into the lot she noticed that it was pretty empty, most of the bikes were gone all apart from one. Looking around she realised that the lone biker was neither in the office or the garage so she made he way into the clubhouse, where she found that lone biker sitting at the bar, with a glass of what looked like Whisky in front of him.

"Bad morning?" She commented as she took the seat beside him. She expected a witty comment like always or at least one of his teeth baring smiles that could brighten up anyone's shitty day but nothing. In fact he didn't even look at her.

Juice didn't even realise anyone had entered the clubhouse until they came and sat beside him. His head was on overloaded with trying to figure out what the hell he was going to do. But when she spoke he couldn't help but register her presence.

He knew it was Nicole without even having to look at her. He thought the last person he would want to see right now was a brother but he was wrong.

Roosevelt had asked him to do something that completely tested his loyalty to the club. The club he loved more than anything, and if Roosevelt didn't have the dirt on him that he did, then Juice wouldn't even be contemplating this. But he did and no matter how long he sat there trying to think of a way he could stay alive without having to do what Roosevelt had asked of him, he knew that there was no way out. Which is why he didn't want to be sitting next to Nicole of all people.

How could he look her in the eye when he knew that he was about to betray her whole family.

"That bad huh?" When Juice just nodded she reached over the bar and grabbed herself a glass before taking the bottle next to him and pouring herself a drink. "Someone once told me that drinking alone is pathetic, so..." She clicked her glass against his and took a sip of her drink. He still never said anything and she was really starting to worry. "So I'll tell you about my shit morning if you tell me what's got you sitting here in the morning nursing a bottle of Whisky." Again nothing. This wasn't the Juice she knew most of the time he didn't shut up, but now...well his silence was just weird. "Look Juice your starting to scare me here, what's wrong?"

Juice shut his eyes when she touched her arm. He felt like a complete scumbag. But then she uttered the words that made him feel even lower.

"Your shit morning have anything to do with this new Sheriff?" Finally he looked at her but instead of looking into his usual reassuring, safe eyes she was looking into a pair of scared nervous looking eyes that didn't reassure her one little bit, in fact they did quite the opposite. And then he grabbed her hand pulling it from his arm.

"What are you talking about, how did you know about him..." Juice rambled, completely thrown by her question.

"Chibs mentioned something last night about this Roosevelt hassling the club, told me he was zoning in on you, I didn't mean anything by it Juice I just..."

She was being way to nice to him and it was making him hate himself even more for what he was contemplating on doing. Dropping his hold of her hand immediately when he noticed the flash of fear appear on her face. He basically ran out of the clubhouse as quickly as he could, ignoring her as she called him back. He just couldn't look at her.

_What the fuck just happened. _Nicole just sat there completely confused. She tried to figure out what she had said, done, to make him react that way. She knew they had history and she knew that she hadn't exactly treated him the best but they were past that, weren't they?

She topped up her drink, not caring what time of day it was.

* * *

Nicole had no idea how long she had been sitting there when she heard the door open again. She hoped that it was Juice so that she could try and figure out what the hell had happened before, but to her surprise it was Clay who was walking towards her not Juice.

"Staring early?" Clay remarked pointing to the bottle in front of her.

"Something like that. You want to join me?" Normally Clay would refuse but after the morning he'd had he couldn't think of anything better. With a nod of his head Nicole poured him a glass as he took a seat beside her.

"You okay Princess?" He pressed a kiss to her cheek before adjusting himself on the bar stool. He had to admit that it was a little concerning to see his niece sitting in the clubhouse drinking Whisky at this time of day.

"I guess." Clay accepted the shot Nicole was handing him.

"So where's your boy at?" Nicole took a sip of her drink before looking at Clay.

"Back at the house. I actually came here to find you."

"Me?"

"Gemma said you wanted to talk to me. Now before you start I've already had the lecture from Gemma so I really don't need or want another one." Any other day Clay would remind her that he could do what he wanted and that she was actually the one at fault here for keeping this man of hers a secret. He was an outsider, meaning he could be anyone. But after a brief walk down memory lane from Unser Clay was thinking about the mistakes he had made that had nearly taken the life of the girl in front of him. The thought made him feel sick with guilt. Which is why he was deciding to give her a break, he'd caused her enough trouble and judging by the Whiskey in front of her, her morning had been about as good as his and he knew his wife was probably to thank for that.

"He's clean Clay." Clay nodded and took a drink.

"Then there shouldn't be a problem." Nicole sighed in defeat. She couldn't be bothered to argue with him. After her row with Gemma she didn't have the energy. Grabbing her purse off the bar she pulled out a small piece of paper and handed it to Clay. She knew that this would be coming no way would her family allow her to marry a man who they didn't know anything about and she knew Liam had nothing to hide so she didn't really see any point in fighting them on this. Clay took the paper, his eyes raking over the information. He had to stop himself from smiling at her. She really was club.

"You know I'm only doing this because I love you right?"

"I know." Clay scooted forward and took her hand in his.

"I will always do everything I can to protect you, Jax, Gemma, all of my family."

"I know." _Seriously what is it with these guys today? _First it was Juice acting strange and now it was Clay. Both men were acting to weird for her liking.

Then she remembered- as if she could ever really forget- that her family were now wrapped up with Gallindo.

"Are you okay?" She asked trying to look deeper into her eyes to see if she could somehow get something from him. Hoping to get some sort of sense what was going on in her Uncles head trying to figure out if her family was in any trouble. But he gave her nothing.

"Yeah. I'm good sweetheart." He leant over and kissed her cheek again. "Thanks for this." He held the piece of paper up before tucking it inside his cut. Nicole watched for the second time that morning as a Son turned their back on her leaving her totally confused. Although this time when she called out his name the Son didn't keep walking.

"You available tonight? Was thinking that maybe I'd cook a meal, you me, Gemma, Jay, Tara. That way you can meet Liam properly get to know him properly." Clay smiled at his niece.

"Sure. We'll be there. And i'll even make sure to rein in your Aunt."

"Sounds good to me."

"Good. Now enough drinking its not even 12 princess."

"Promise." She held up her hands in a surrendering motion. "No more drink." She smirked. "Be at yours for 8."

"It's a date." With a quick wink Clay walked out of the clubhouse, leaving Nicole once again alone.

* * *

Liam hated that he had let her just go. He should have put his foot down told her that he didn't allow it, but who was he kidding he would never treat her like that, but then again he never really had to. She had always done everything she could to make him happy.

She had been at this _clubhouse _going on two hours and during that time he hadn't been able to stop thinking about this _Happy _person or more the relationship they had. By what Gemma had said it sounded like this Happy was there last night when he had arrived.

He tried to cast his mind back to who had been there, which one of the 10 scary bikers was Nicole's ex. He immediately crossed the older members of the group of the list so that just left 7 seven, although he was hoping that he could cross the guy with the wild black hair and the guy with none off his list. And he hoped he could cross her cousin Jax off that list to, he prayed to god they weren't one of these families who allowed or encouraged to keep it with the family. Truthfully he didn't like imagining Nicole with any of those men. They were all wearing these leather vest, most of them unshaven and pretty much all of them were covered in tattoos, they were through and through out laws.

_How could she ever be with one of these men?_

_Would she really choose one of them over me?_

_What does he have that I don't?_

Those were the sort of questions that were occupying his head at the very moment Nicole walked through the door.

"Where the hell have you been?" Liam never meant for his words to come out so harshly but they did and noting the shock on her face from his unprovoked outburst Liam left his seat at the kitchen table and went to her his arms wrapping around her as he pulled her close and kissed her tenderly. Pulling back he rested his head against hers and moved his one hand to her soft cheek. But as he went to kiss her again he stopped finally registering the taste of her lips. "Have you been drinking?" It wasn't the fact that she had been drinking- even though it was early and she tasted of hard liquor something he'd never known her to drink before- he was more concerned about who she had shared this drink with._ Was it him, Happy?_

Nicole backed up so she could look at him properly, he didn't look like his normal self, he looked so angry with her, and although she knew full well that she hadn't done anything wrong she could only imagine after what he had heard this morning, what he was thinking.

"Yeah its was just a little one. Clay insisted." Okay it may be a lie but it was only a little one she had lied about much worse. Although for the first time in her life she could have sworn she saw a flicker of doubt in his eyes. Choosing not to focus on it she breezed past him placing her bag on the counter and grabbing two bottles of water from the fridge.

"Thanks." Liam caught the bottle she threw to him as he followed her into the kitchen. "So what did Clay have to say?"

"Well not a lot really but that's not unlike Clay, it went better than Gemma though." She took a sip of the water when an awkward silence lingered between them.

"Your Aunt wasn't hap..." He was going to say happy but he just couldn't say the word. "She doesn't like me does she?"

"It's not you." Nicole place her bottle on the counter and edged towards him, her hand reaching out and coming to land on his chest. "My aunt as much as I love her, loves to interfere in other peoples lives. This morning she was pissed because she knew not matter what she said or did she wasn't going to be able to change my mind."

"Change your mind about what?" Liam questioned nervously. Nicole took the final step. She was standing so close their bodies were almost touching. Her hand on his chest trialing down his abs before taking his hand in hers.

"About leaving Charming and marrying you."

"You still want to do that?" He was surprised, and she hated that Gemma's words had gotten into his head. The sooner they were out of Charming the better.

"Of course I do. Do you?"

"More than anything." He lent down and Nicole's free hand found its way to the nape of his neck as they shared a kiss. "I love you."

"Me too." He tilted his head and Nicole knew that he was hurt that she hadn't said it back, but then again she had said more than her fair share of _I love you's_ over the past 24 hours. So she changed the subject. "I've arranged a family dinner for tonight."

"Family dinner?" There was that fear again she had seen when she had entered the house.

"Yeah you, me, Clay, Gemma, Jay and Tara and the little ones. Nothing to big. Said about 8ish. Is that okay?" Liam let out a breath he didn't realise he was holding when she told him that it would just be her Aunt, Uncle and her cousin and partner. No unwelcome bikers.

"Sounds good to me."

"Clay even promised to make sure Gemma was on her best behavior."

"I'm sure everything will be fine."

"I'm sure it will to. So do you fancy a trip to main street?" Liam ran his knuckles over cheek, before kissing her again.

"We have a little time before we have to go?" Nicole knew what he was insinuating and if this was what he needed she would willingly comply.

"Yeah I think we done." She squealed as Liam lifted her off her feet and carried her to her bedroom.

* * *

Darby walked across the street from the bar on main street to his truck when something caught his eye. Sliding his sunglasses down his nose he squinted to try and get better look. Her hair was shorter, lighter but there was no mistaking that the woman walking hand in hand with a man who looked like he stepped out of GQ magazine was none other than Nicole Teller.

Darby couldn't stop the smug smirk creeping onto his face. His day just got a hell of a lot more interesting.


	15. Chapter 15

Hey guys, well first off I am so so so sorry about the delay in updates. I promise I haven't forgotten about this story. The reason for the delay was because I somehow contracted a kidney infection. And let me tell you it completely knocked me out. I never realised how painful something like that would be. I have basically been glued to my bed for a week and a bit and have been completely in a zombiefied state. But good news is I'm just coming to end of my antibiotics and I'm starting to feel more human again. This is the first day I actually felt like I could pick up my laptop and write without it all coming out gibberish. Hopefully now I'm on the right track the updates will be more frequent. Anyway again I'm sorry and to make it up to all you lovely readers I've posted two chapters. Hope you all enjoy...

Everything Changes

Chapter Fifteen.

"_Aren't you going to offer me a drink" She asked looking at the glass of amber liquid in his free hand._

"_What are you doing here Nicole?" Nicole shrugged walking further into the room._

"_Maybe you put the gun down and we'll talk about it." Darby let out a sharp breath before throwing his glass to the floor as he advanced towards her, gun still drawn. _

_Nicole didn't react, didn't try and stop him as he grabbed her by the collar of her jacket and pushed her back against the wall, jabbing the gun in her stomach. His eyes darted over the bruises that were already scattered over her body and face. A smile edging onto his face about the marks that he could add. But forgetting the momentarily joy he found in thinking about what he could do to her now that he finally had her he realised something wasn't right. He had tried many times to get his hands on her but he had always been stopped by some member of Samcro. He looked towards the window. _

"_Is this some sort of set up because I swear..." He growled tightening his grip as he looked back at her._

"_I came here alone." Nicole replied with confidence, surprising the man in front of her._

_"Your not that stupid." He snorted._

_"If you want to kill me Darby then just do it?" Again she spoke with confidence. She watched the confusion take over his face, but that wasn't what she wanted, she wanted to make him angry. So angry that he wouldn't think twice about taking her life. So she goaded him some more._

_"Come on Darby, you can't tell me you don't want to this. I killed Michael. I killed your son remember." She saw the flair of anger burn behind his eyes. This is what she wanted, needed. "I got him drunk, I made him take the drugs, I stole the car, I drove it at the wall. I KILLED HIM." She couldn't stop her tears. Her sadness the words she was saying and what had happened hours ago at T/M finally started getting to her. She was hurting so bad and she just wanted to make it all stop. Wrapping her hand around the barrel of the gun pressed against her stomach, she pulled it away and pressed it to her chest. Darby allowing her. _

"_Kill me go on." Her hands were shaking now but she didn't stop. "COME ON DO IT..."_

* * *

Nicole felt her stomach drop as she stared at the man in front of her. She could feel the panic starting to set in. _What was he doing here?_

"Sorry." Liam's voice brought Nicole out of her trance state. Looking up at him she was relieved to see a smile on his face obviously. He was oblivious that there was connection between herself and Darby who Liam had just accidentally bumped with their shopping cart. Although Nicole found it hard to believe that it was an accident.

"Don't be, my fault I wasn't looking where I was going." Nicole's eyes shot back to Darby as he spoke. Why had she thought it was a good idea to go to him that day, that day started off her downward spiral. Started off the nightmare that was those four months. She felt sick, she was going to be sick.

"Sorry anyway." Nicole slid closer to Liam, her hands latching onto his arm as Darby made his move past them. She spared a glance up at Liam who's interest had now gone back to the isle they had been looking at before. Darby got closer and Nicole practically had her body pinned against Liam's but that didn't stop Darby running his finger tips across her hip. She swallowed back the bile that rose in her throat as she forced herself to look at him, although she wish she hadn't. He had the same sick sadistic smile he'd had on his face the day she asked him to kill her. In someways she just wish he'd had pulled the trigger. Would have saved a lot of hassle.

"So what else is left on the list?" When Liam didn't get an answer he turned to see Nicole staring in the direction the man had left in. "Nic..Nicole.."

"Hmmm..." Finally registering Liam's voice she turned to look at her Fiancé.

"Do you know him?"

"Hmmm..."

"That guy we just bumped into do you know him?"

"No." She lied again, but what could she say. She couldn't tell him truth she couldn't tell anyone. God she couldn't wait to be out of Charming, the sooner the better right now especially as Darby was back. "Um... I think we've got everything. We should probably go." Nicole never said anything else. Instead she walked down the length of the shopping cart and grabbed the edge with a shaky hand, guiding it towards the checkout.

* * *

Liam watched as Nicole mindlessly moved around the kitchen preparing the meal for that evening. She had been quiet which wasn't unusual especially during the past couple of months of their relationship but this was to quiet, and she seemed so consumed with something. But the thing that scared Liam the most was that her behavior had something to do with the man he had knocked with the shopping cart.

He again found it hard to think of Nicole knowing someone like that. Someone who he was pretty sure was sporting a Swastika tattoo on his chest. She should not know a man like that. And for the second time that day he was really glad that they would be leaving tomorrow, so they could put this town and the people in it behind them.

When she had told him about her family not exactly being the usual American pie family he thought she was over exaggerating, he actually thought it was interesting that this beautiful woman was raised by bikers, he thought meeting them would be fun but he was wrong.

He wanted to get away from all this. He was already noticing subtle changes in her and he hadn't not even been here for a full day yet. One of the things he noticed was her drinking, last night when he had arrived it was clear that she was drunk, now Nicole did drink but never to the extreme where she got herself into that state, nor did she drink hard liquor like she had this morning.

He didn't like any of it. He wanted to get her as far away as possible from this poison that seemed to be her family.

* * *

Nicole tried to take her mind off Darby and what the hell he was doing back in Charming, how long he had been back and if the Sons knew. _Of course they knew. _Nothing happened in this town without Samcro knowing about it. And that led to her thinking about the things Darby may have said to her family. Would he reveal her secrets, had he?

No. He couldn't have, if her family knew she would know about it because there was no way they wouldn't have something to say about it.

Turning down the heat on the oven, Nicole tried to concentrate on the task at hand rather the complications of her fucked up life. And was happy when she felt Liams arm wrap around he waist. _A distraction._

"You okay?" He asked her as he moved her hair over her shoulder and kissed her neck.

"Yeah." Well he knew that was a lie but instead of probing her about he decided that he would rather place his efforts in making her feel better. Reminding her why she was choosing him.

"It smells good in here."

"Thanks." Nicole tried to continue preparing the vegetables for the meal but was finding it incredibly hard as Liam continued kissing her neck and shoulder. Their sex life had always pretty good Nicole always made sure his needs were attended to as did he-although it didn't compare to someone else, but she wasn't going to let that spoil it-but this was usual they had just had a quickie before leaving for the store and now it seemed he wanted more. "What are you doing?"

"What do you think I'm doing?" Nicole turned in his arms as he pressed her firmly against the counter. His lips moving to hers.

"I think you going for round two." She told him pulling her lips from his.

"And I think your right." He went to kiss her again but Nicole turned her head causing his lips to meet her cheek instead. When she tuned back to look at him she could see his hurt but she just couldn't do this right now, a kiss was one thing but sex was something else especially as all she kept thinking about was Darby.

"Liam as much as I'd love to I really need to get this done." She pecked him on the cheek and turned back around and continued preparing the meal.

Liam sighed to himself. They had one more night left in this town and then they would be back home living their happy little life and Liam couldn't wait. He wanted the girl back that he fell in love with, the girl that he had gotten down on one knee to and proposed, the girl he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.

"Okay. You need a hand?" Nicole smiled and passed him a peeler and some potatoes.

* * *

Nicole scraped the contents of the wasted food into the bin before basically throwing the plate into the sink along with the others. Up until now she had managed to keep her temper in check for Thomas and Abel's but now that Tara had taken them home Nicole didn't care. She was furious. She had spent most of the afternoon preparing the meal she had just thrown in the bin and what for..what was the point no one cared. Slamming another plate into the sink Nicole picked up her glass of red wine and downed half the contents in on go. She needed something to calm her down, and the only thing she knew that would do that she was not aloud although right now she was really considering breaking her sobriety. _No. _She shook that thought from her head she was not going to go back there especially over something like this.

"Hey." Nicole looked up from her glass at Liam who was standing in the doorway. "Look it doesn't matter..."

"Yes it does." Nicole argued, before finishing what was left in her glass. Liam sighed as she turned away from him. It did matter to her anyway after the day she'd had seeing Darby reliving all that shit all she wanted to do was spend time with her family. Forget about everything but no instead they couldn't even be bothered to turn up. She thought if anyone was going to play that game it would be Gemma. Her hand was reaching for the wine bottle when a large hand wrapped around her wrist spinning her around.

"Look sweets we tried and it didn't work. I know your upset..."

"I'm not upset I'm pissed..." Nicole spat as she frowned at him. Liam just nodded and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I love you more than anything. And we're going to back to LA tomorrow and continue living our lives." He dropped a quick kiss onto her forehead. "Planning our wedding. You've tried everything here if your family aren't interested in being apart of that there's nothing more you can do." He knew she was about to say something in defense of her family but honestly he didn't want to hear it. Since he had arrived all her family had seem to do was upset her and Liam didn't like that but at the same time now that she had them back in her life there was no chance she was going to completely cut them out again. And he had to respect that. "But if they change their mind that's good to. Bottom line sweets I'm here with you, for you and I don't plan on going anywhere." A small smile graced her lips as he ran his knuckles over her cheek.

"Your to good for me, you know that. I really don't deserve you." Liam kissed her.

"It's me who doesn't deserve you."

Gemma watched the couple from the entrance to the kitchen. It was clear the boy was smitten with Nicole, it was also clear that he wanted her out of Charming and away from her family, that Gemma didn't like. Gemma didn't want Nicole to leave she needed her in Charming. If the shit hit the fan with those letters it would be Nicole who would help control Jax, make him think clearly before he flew off the handle with Clay and possibly herself. She had tried the hard approach reminding her that there were people here that she loved but that hadn't worked. Gemma blamed herself for that pushing her on Kozik had been a mistake it was clear there was nothing between them but friendship. Happy however, Gemma had defiantly touched a nerve there. And even though she had reservations about the whole thing she knew if she was ever going to get Nicole to stay she would have to show that she supported this thing with Happy. Clearing her throat Gemma watched the two of them turn at look at her. The pissed expression that Nicole had had on her face, now back.

"You mind giving us a minute Darlin'?" Liam looked back at Nicole who gave him a nod and a kiss on the cheek. Before whispering to him that she would be fine. Nicole folded her arms across her chest and turned to lean against the counter. She watched Gemma force a smile at Liam before stepping further inside.

"If your going to give me another lecture Gemma you can save your breath. I don't care."

"Wasn't going to lecture." Gemma moved closer so she was side by side with Nicole against the counter. "Smoke?" Nicole looked passed Gemma to where Liam had just left. She smoked but in secret, Liam wasn't a huge fan of it. But she would be lying if she said she wasn't dying for some nicotine right now.

"Thanks."

"You know the club always come first baby." Gemma spoke after a few moments of silence.

"I know." Nicole rubbed a hand over her forehead. "But right now I just don't care Gemma."

"Yeah. Maybe you should go talk him though, Jax." She clarified after Nicole looked at her confused.

"No he can't be bothered neither can I."

"You don't mean that." Nicole didn't answer instead taking a drag of her cigarette. "Why don't you head over to the clubhouse anyway baby. some of the guys might be there and I'm sure they would like to see you, you know before you leave tomorrow." Nicole raised her eyebrow at Gemma. "I overheard you two before. Don't worry like I said I'm not here to lecture. But you do need to say bye to them. Maybe Happy will be there to." Gemma remarked before taking a drag of her cigarette. She could feel Nicole looking at her and she knew she was probably trying to figure out what game Gemma was trying to play.

"Gem..."

"Look I don't exactly get it, whatever it is between you two but there's clearly something. Something that's got you messed up enough to think the answer to all your problems are leaving again." Gemma stood in front of Nicole. "I know your old enough now to make your own decisions even though I forget that from time to time." She kissed her on the cheek. "You'll do what's right baby."

Nicole was shocked she couldn't believe that Gemma had just given her blessing. She had certainly changed her tune from the morning. Nicole didn't know what to make of it though she knew her Aunt and she knew she always had a play up her sleeve. It didn't matter anyway she was still leaving, but she had to admit Gemma did have one point.

* * *

"We're out of milk I'm just going to pop out and get some." Nicole announced as she walked back into living space where Liam was sat watching the T.V. with Gemma.

"I'll just get my shoes on, I'll come with you." Nicole shook her head.

"It's okay I won't be long. I'm just going to grab my bag." Nicole didn't wait for a response from him before she went to her room. Grabbing her Channel she went into her holdall and pulled out the jacket, his jacket. Staring at it she wondered if this was the right thing to do but again she was leaving tomorrow so it was now or never. Shoving the jacket into her bag she grabbed her keys and left Liam in the hopefully capable hands of Gemma. _This was so not a good idea. _

* * *

She parked up just outside T/M, milk sitting on the passenger seat. She wasn't stupid she was good at lying and good at making sure she always backed up her lies. She wasn't exactly sure why she had stopped just outside but she had and now she found herself sitting in the driver seat, window down taking deep breaths. She was worried, nervous even and she couldn't explain it and she didn't want the guys to see her like this.

She was in such limbo at the moment she knew what she had to do but also knew what she wanted and they seemed to be two different things. IT was either follow her heart or head. Heart, It was always heart with Nicole but she reminded herself where her heart had gotten her and maybe it was time to follow her head. With that thought Nicole turned over the engine and was about to pull in when a bike came speeding out of the lot. It was Juice.

Ignoring her previous decision to start listening to her head rather than her heart Nicole was driving past T/M and was in pursuit of the speeding motorcycle.

* * *

Juice knew he didn't have much of a window to do this but he found himself just staring at the brick of coke in front of him. If he took this sample it would be crossing a line he wasn't sure he could come back from.

But if he did this he would be helping the Sons, Roosevelt told him himself that they weren't after the Sons. They wanted the Irish, the Cartel not them. Then there were the personal reasons. The fact that if he didn't do this then Roosevelt would let slip about his family genetics. And even though he kept repeating that, reasoning with himself that what he was about to do was the right thing deep down in his heart he knew all of the above was bullshit.

He was about to betray his club, his family.

Closing his eyes and taking a much needed breath, Juice pulled out his pocket knife and a small plastic bag and prepared himself for what he was about to do. Just before opening his eyes he saw her face and the reality became came even stronger. He couldn't does this.

Opening his eyes he placed the knife and bag back into the pockets of his black hooded sweatshirt and was about to put the brick back when Phil's banged on the door calling out his name. _Fuck_. He knew the noise would alert the Mayan on watch.

Panicking, he knew he didn't have time to put the brick back, so without thinking and purely on instinct he shoved the brick down the front of his pants and unlocked the door to be greeted by Phil, and then the Mayan VP. Realising there was noway he could go back inside and replace the brick without looking suspicious. He turned off the light and locked the door. Reassuring both men that he was just doing a quick check and all was good.

With no other choice Juice walked out of the warehouse and mounted his bike. Driving a short distance he pulled up to a wooded area. He had no other choice but to wait this out and return the brick early in the morning before the Sons and the Mayans came together to check the merchandise before handing it to Romeo.


	16. Chapter 16

Everything Changes 

Chapter Sixteen

"What's that?" Clay question intrigued by the plastic bag that lay just in front of his wife as she sat on their queen sized bed.

"The letters." Clay cocked a brow at his wife as he picked up the bag. A quick inspection he realised that the chard pieces of paper inside were none other than the ones he had saved from the fire. It also became clear to him that his wife had been behind his back obviously trying to sort this shit out on her own. He didn't know whether he was pissed or proud.

Gemma studied her husband as he inspected the bag. They were the copies Unser had managed to retrieve. She was shocked to find them burned when she went to see Unser yesterday, his excuse was that what was written inside was to painful for her to read. She didn't exactly believe that but at the same time she wasn't going to argue or beg him to tell her what they said because she was sick of relieving old shit. It opened up to many old wounds.

That's why she took the pieces of burned paper and was showing them to Clay. She knew he was starting to get itchy about this shit, about the shit storm those letters could bring down on him. She was also more than aware of the lengths he would go to, to prevent all that.

He killed JT without so much as a second thought would he really bat an eye lid at killing the people involved in this, Tara, Piney. Gemma didn't think so.

She wanted to protect all of her family from this including Clay.

"Found them in Tara's office, in her desk draw. Mostly love letters, painfull shit I had to burn them." She said with a blasé attitude as she got to her feet. But her response just backed up up what Clay was thinking. She had gone behind his back and these weren't the real letters. They were still out there. "It's done baby." Gemma closed the distance and placed a kiss upon his cheek. "Nobody can hurt us baby."

"Yeah thank god." Clay pulled her closer and pressed his lips against hers. He had lied, she had lied. There was nothing to be thankful for she hadn't stopped people from being able to hurt them. Truth was the real letters were still out there. Tara and Piney still knew the truth. Nothing was over in fact it was just beginning.

* * *

Nicole once again found herself mindlessly making breakfast. But this time her mind wasn't focused on what her family was going to think about the arrival of her Fiancé, this time she couldn't stop thinking about what she had stumbled across last night or rather the implications it held.

She still didn't understand why she felt the urge to follow him, but she did, all the way to Oswald's. She had dumped her car on the side of the road and decided to follow him the rest of the way on foot. Again she couldn't explain why but she did even though she wasn't exactly dressed for the occasion- bitch heels and a tight fitted dress was not the best attire for sneaking around up a dirt track – but she just had this feeling that something wasn't right.

Juice had been off that day and it had unnerved her. But no more than weird than the events that followed.

Bought from her thoughts by the front door opening and closing Nicole craned her neck to get a look at the early visitor. Unsurprisingly Jax strolled down the hallway heading into the kitchen when he spotted her.

Knowing that he was about to feed her a load of bullshit Nicole returned to making the breakfast she was preparing for herself and Liam- even though she had no appetite.

"Nic..." _And here comes the bullshit._ She thought to herself as she fought the urge to throw the fork in her hand at him.

"Don't." She snapped before turning to face him. "Let me guess something came up with the club." Even though Jax remained silent he answered her question. "Well I hope it was at least worth it." She sassed before turning her back on him again as the toast popped up.

"Retaliation for Luann." Nicole froze. Luann's murde was a brutal one and until now her death had gone without retribution.

"Is this what Otto asked for?" Nicole knew about Gemma's meet with him but had yet to speak to her about what was discussed. Noting the slight nod Nicole let out a shuddered breath forgetting about the toast. "Caurso?" Again he nodded. "Is he..." The remainder of her question went unsaid but Jax knew what she was asking, and it was his silence that stunned her. There was no nod no reassuring look that that shit had been handled, the only reaction she got was a bad one. She watched his gaze drop from hers and land on his feet. "Please tell me you did what was needed Jay, tell me he's where he belongs, which is six feet under." Jax still couldn't look at her and again his silence answered her question. "Fuck." She hissed as she ran her fingers through her hair.

"The club needs him..."

"He killed Luann. That should be the end of it Jay. He killed a members Old Lady." She spat. She wanted to scream it but she made sure her voice was low enough so that Jax was the only one able to hear her, she really didn't need Liam overhearing this conversation.

"I wish it was that simple Nic." Jax placed a cigarette between his lips as he closed the gap between them. He had made a promise to himself that he wasn't going to keep anymore shit from her. Last time he did she ran and he did not want that to happen because of him. "We have to look at the bigger picture here. Gerogie can pull in some investors that Hale needs for Charming Heights." He could see her confusion. "He pushes his contacts then he tells them to pull out at the last minute. Leaving Hale high and dry." Nicole shook her head.

When she first returned she felt the pang in her chest, she had missed Charming so much. It was her home and she missed everyone who was apart of that. She even found herself falling into her old ways because it was so natural to her. But as soon as she had heard those words leave Jax's mouth, that Samcro was now in the drug business with none other than the Gallindo Cartel she knew Charming wasn't the home she loved and remembered, the deal had changed and would continue to change everything. And last night was just another slice of evidence to that.

"This is just to fucked up, this club is just to fucked up."

"I know it's shit but this needs to happen Otto will understand that."

"Really?" She shook her head again. "I can't understand this Jay. And I won't have to." Breakfast completely forgotten about Nicole went to walk past him but Jax stopped her. His hand catching hers.

"What's that supposed to mean?" He was so close and this time his eyes were glued to her as she let hers drop to the floor. "Nic."

"I'm leaving." Her voice was no louder than a whisper. "Me and Liam have a flight booked for this evening."

Jax didn't know what to make of this little piece of information. He knew her stay wasn't going to be a long one but he was surprised to hear that she was leaving today. It was too soon, he wasn't ready to lose her again, but he knew that the shit the club was facing was asking too much of her. She'd dealt with enough over the past 14 months. Whereas he had thought deep down in the back of his mind that there might be a possibility that she might be dead, Nicole had gone 14 months believing that he was. She had moved on, created a new life, and as much as he hated to admit it didn't fit with this one.

"Nic..." Nicole pulled away, pulling her hand out of his grip. Her head shaking as her body shook. She hated seeing that look in his eyes. Sadness mixed with guilt. He seemed to be looking at her like that all the time lately.

"This club is changing Jay and you know as well I do that it's not for the best."

"This shit with Georgie is fucked up, I know tha..."

"It's not just that Jay and you know it..."

Before Nicole could say anymore she noticed Jax look over her shoulder. Taking a look she found Clay and Gemma standing behind her both of them looking concerned about what they were seeing.

"Everything okay?" Gemma asked breaking the awkward silence lingering in the room. Nicole turned back to look at Jax as she spoke.

"I'm leaving." She spoke firmly and confidently.

"What?" Nicole turned away from Jax and focused on Clay as she answered his question.

"Me and Liam we're going back to LA today. Our flight leaves this afternoon."

"C'mere Princess." Nicole was hesitant at first, but gave in and slowly walked over to her Uncles opening arms. "I understand, you do what you have to do, as much I would like you to stay...I get it..." Clay felt the other two sets of eyes in the room on him but he didn't bother to look at them. "But will you promise me something." Nicole nodded. "Come visit your old man once in a while and swing by the clubhouse and say goodbye to everyone."

"Promise." Nicole hugged him and kissed his cheek. "Thankyou Clay." Pulling away she breezed passed Gemma ignoring the icy stare.

"What the hell are you doing Clay. We can't just let her leave." Gemma snapped when the door to Nicole's room closed. Gemma had been certain that last night Nicole had gone to the clubhouse to find Happy. And she thought that when she returned she would have changed her mind about going but that obviously wasn't the case.

"Not our decision." Clay turned his attention on to Jax who looked just as annoyed as his mother. "We need to head up to the Warehouse." Clay ordered as he headed for the door.

Clay didn't really like the fact that his niece was leaving again with an outsider- even if the background check came back clear- he'd rather have her stay put in Chaming where she was at least protected but considering the current situation with those letters he would was willing to let her go until that problem was handled. It would be bad enough if Jax found out what was written in them, but according to Unser JT had stupidly admitted to that Irish gnash in those letters about how Nicole was present for one of his attempts at taking JT's life. That shit was never gone to sit well and if Nicole found out about that he knew she would hate him and he couldn't bare that. So for now having her 6 hours away was probably for the best.

* * *

"Already packing." Nicole noted as she watched Liam putting the last of their belongings into the holdalls. Her comment distracted and forced his attention onto her. He looked a little worried like he wasn't sure what her reaction was going to be. And truth be told Nicole didn't really how she felt about everything.

Before Liam arrived, before she found out about the Cartel Nicole could feel herself being drawn back to this life. Back home.

But then came Liam and the came the news of the Cartel and then Darby, throw all them into the mix and Nicole quickly found herself changing her mind. She needed to put distance between herself and all that shit and she was going to and then last night happened. She didn't know what it was she exactly witnessed but she knew it wasn't good. She also knew that she wouldn't feel right leaving without at least tying to figure out what it was she saw.

"I just want to make sure we've got everything." Liam explained as he went back to packing. It was obvious to her that he wanted out of here asap, if he could get an earlier flight she was pretty damn sure he would take it.

"So I'm gonna have to drop by the clubhouse at some point today so I can say goodbye to everyone. Is that okay?" _Why am I asking?_ She thought mentally rolling her eyes at herself. She didn't need permission.

"Sure. What time?" Nicole shrugged.

"When I'm ready I guess. Hour maybe."

"Okay, I'll be ready in an hour then." Nicole couldn't hide the shocked expression from her face.

"Your coming with me, I kind of thought..." Liam stopped packing and went over to stand in front of her, his extra height making her crane her neck back so she could look at him properly.

"I'm coming Nicole. It's important to you so it's important to me." He dropped a kiss onto her head. "I'm going to take a shower." Nicole stood still slightly stunned by Liam. She appreciated that he wanted to be apart of her life but she really needed to have this conversation alone.

* * *

It was the sound of chatter that woke him from his accidental self made bed for the night. He hadn't meant to fall asleep he was planning on sneaking back into the warehouse early hours of the morning and put the coke back but he had stupidly let his tiredness over rule him. And now peaking from behind the bushes of his hideout he saw the Mayan cuts out front and he knew he'd missed his window of opportunity.

Panicking Juice ran back to his place of rest and buried the brick of coke underneath a pile of dead weeds, rocks and grass.

The roar of Harley's drawing closer signalled the arrival of his brothers. Running to his bike he turned over the engine. Pulling up before his brothers arrived, a slight flick of his head gestured towards the Mayan President as a way of greeting Juice got off his bike and turned around to see his brothers pulling in behind him.

"Your early?" Jax expressed clapped a hand on his shoulder.

"Was at the Weed shop thought I might aswell head straight up here. I knew the Mayans would show early." Juice let out a relieved breath when Jax cracked a smile.

"Good thinking."

The Sons and The Mayans stood around the makeshift table inside the storage compartment of the warehouse watching as Opie unloaded the coke and Chibs stacked them in rows of five. They were just down to the last stack when Chibs noticed something was wrong.

"This it?" Chibs directed to Opie who started checking the box.

"That's it."

"We're one brick light."

"What you talking about?" Clay came to stand next to Chibs as he looked over the stacks in front of them.

"I'm talk'n bout der shud be thirty keys ere."

"29." Alvarez confirmed after a quick count. Questioning looks were exchanged between the opposing charters.

* * *

Jax paced the length of the warehouse his breathing strained, wondering how the hell this could be happening. In less than five hours they had to deliver the coke that they had mulled out from Tucson Charter. Only problem was they were down one brick. Both sides had accused the other but decided that fighting about it would get them nowhere. Instead they decided that they should press their own guys and whoever was found guilty would pay the price with their life. It didn't matter if it was Mayan or Son.

Jax tried to figure this shit out but just couldn't wrap his head around that fact that one of his brothers would be responsible for this. It had to be Mayan. But with that thought he knew he had to at least press his guys.

"I'm gonna call Happy, get him to sort this out." Jax told Clay.

"Good. I'll get Miles to check the cameras." Jax nodded and started to leave when Clay spoke up again. "You realise how bad this shit will get if we don't find that key." Jax nodded. He had a pretty good idea how things were going to go down if they didn't get this sorted and the thought turned his stomach.

* * *

Liam pulled the car into a space. On the short drive over he had subtly been watching his Fiancé in the passenger seat. Since sitting in the car she hadn't stopped fiddling with the ring on her necklace. He had seen her do this a few times in the time he had known her and had finally put it down to a nervous twitch. But he didn't know why she was nervous and he wondered if it had anything to do with that bag that was nestled between her legs.

She had run back out into the house just before she was leaving telling him she had forgotten something, a minute later she returned with this bag and when he queried what was inside all she had told him was that it was just something she had to return.

He had tried to sneak a peak at it but nothing. She kept the bag close. And this secrecy was really starting to piss him off. He should never have let her come to Charming.

Hearing the door shut, Liam realised Nicole was out of the car. Following behind her quickly they covered the small stretch of ground that lay between them and the Clubhouse. But just as they reached the door Nicole stopped when she heard the familiar sound of Harleys pulling into the lot. Liam grabbed her hand in his. Nicole noticed this but decided not to comment on it. Instead turning her attention back to Clay. Miles, Jax, Opie and Tig who were all backing their bikes up in the usual formation.

Continuing to watch Nicole quickly dismissed the thought that they had come here to see her. They looked pissed. Especially Tig, Opie and Jax. That combination was never a good one.

Without even thinking about it she pulled her hand free of Liam's and went to meet them.

"What are you doing here, you okay?" Jax asked her before she could even open her mouth.

"Yeah. What's going on?" She looked around all of them before Tig finally gave her the answer she was looking for.

"Dawn's here."

"Shit your Dawn?" Tig nodded. Nicole loved Dawn. She and Fawn were the only other female babies of Samcro- well Nicole was a niece to JT but he still thought of her own as did everyone within Samco- and Dawn and Nicole became best friends, bonding over their love/ hate relationship of Samcro. Both girls loved their family but both also had an itching to become more than Samcro Princesses. They wanted to be known for them rather than who their family was.

Over the years both had tried to do that both running from their families to make it on their own only to find themselves running back home. The only difference being that Nicole came home because she needed her family, wanted them while Dawn only ever showed up playing the family card when she needed money.

"So why are you looking so pissed. Afraid your Old Ladies going to find out your first timers reappeared." Nicole teased. Jax had popped Dawn's cherry, and Dawn returned the favor by popping Opie's. It was a weird little triangle and Tig hated it but it seemed to work. After all cherry's were popped none of them ended up in bed together again and nothing was complicated they all remained close.

Nicole noticed Opie's eyes fall from hers and not only Tig's shoulders tighten but Clay and Jax;s to. Nicole realised that something was off and it wasn't just to do with Dawn. "What's going on?"

"This one fucked that Porn bitch. Lyla found out."

"Shit.."

"That aint the worst." Clay continued. "Ima pulled a gun on your Aunt, Tara and the boys." Clay's anger clear.

"Ima. Jesus Christ Op what wer..."

"Not now Nic." Jax shouted causing her eyes to fall onto him. There was clearly more going on so for now Nicole let this drop, but she wouldn't be able to forgive or forget that Cum rag Ima, Nicole was fed up of that bitch messing with her family.

Jax had confided to Nicole that he had slept with Ima just before he had left for Belfast. He promised her it meant nothing, it was just a quick fuck. Tara had just rejected him adding more damage to there already failing relationship and he was weak, in a bad place. Nicole of course couldn't give him a lecture she had made enough fuck-ups in her life to be judgemental. But that didn't mean she was going to stand around and let bitch cause more trouble.

Stepping aside to let the rest of them past Nicole watched them leave before her eyes finally found their way back to Liam. She noticed most of them, besides Jax completely ignored him, but then again Liam didn't exactly make an effort either. It was a clear picture of how her life would be if she and Liam were to stay. The two worlds would never work. It was one or the other. Thankfully she or rather circumstances had made that decision for her.

* * *

Liam sat on the worn leather sofa observing Nicole, in this place which he couldn't find any other word to describe it other than white biker trash at its finest. The walls were a dark red trimmed with smoke stains. Reapers- matching the one on the back of the cut they wore- were littered around the room. He sat across from a stage which housed not one but two stripper poles. And over the other side of the room, if he squinted he could have sworn that there were mug shots hanging there. And then there was the smell. A mixture of booze, smoke, sweat and something else he couldn't quite but his finger on. Either way this would have been the last place he would have associated with his Fiancé, but there she was looking more at home and happier than during all the time he had known her, which scared him even more.

He waited patiently as he could, smiling and answering the odd question some members of her _'family'_ saw fit to ask, until he noticed that his Fiancé finally had an opening.

Wasting no time in going to her, Liam was in front of her in seconds, and he didn't miss how her smile altered slightly or though he wish he had. But before he could say anything Nicole's attention was in demand yet again.

"And who is this hottie?" Liam watched her shake her head before the smile that had been there before he came over reappeared.

"Dawny, this is Liam, my fiancé." He felt a little more at ease when her arm linked through his.

"Damn girl he's fine." He felt a little uneasy as this _'Dawny's'_ gaze fell onto him. "You ever get bored of this little bitch you should come find me." He didn't know what to make of the comment but when he watched Nicole slap the girls arm playfully while laughing a laugh he hadn't heard in a long time, he realised that it was a joke.

"He's all mine bitch." Liam enjoyed the sensation of having her arms wrap around him even if it was for show.

"Well in that case you better treat her damn good."

"I will. I love her" Liam spoke firmly making sure that not only Dawn heard it but that Nicole did as well.

"Good to hear, because I love this girl and so do all those bastards." He didn't have to look to know that Dawn was pointing those pictures-which he realised as he got closer to Nicole were in fact mugshots- on the wall behind them. "So don't even think about screwing her over."

"Wouldn't dream of it." He wasn't sure what came over him, he was never one of these men who liked to mark his territory, but then again he's never had to, but here he was giving the room a quick scan to make sure all eyes were on him-he wasn't surprised to find that they were- before making a grand gesture, proving to all exactly who she belonged to now. His one hand came up to rest on her cheek while the other rested on the small of her back. His lips where on hers, his tongue forcing entrance as he dipped her back, true Hollywood style. He kept kissing until he felt Nicole start pulling away from him which was a lot sooner than he wanted or hoped.

"Liam." She whispered against his lips just loud enough for him to hear. He wasted no time in pulling back, but made sure he kept her pressed against him, as he once again did a glance of the room. No one looked impressed which just backed up his theory that he needed to get her as far away fom Charming and this _'family'_ as possible.

"Okay I get the point your obviously trying to make. But just in case the names Margo with and X." She gave him a quick wink and cheeky smack to the ass before walking back over to the table with the man with curly black hair and a killer look in his eyes. Uncomfortable under his gaze Liam turned back to look at Nicole.

"Who the hell is that?" He said with a smile.

"Long story...but while we're asking question what the hell was that?" Liam knew that she was referring to the PDA he had just pulled and for once in his life his was glad to see one of those _family members _she seemed to love so dearly approach her. He wondered if this was Happy.

"So this the Fiancé I've been hearing so much about?" The guy had at least 6 inches on him if not more. He tensed when he felt her slip out of his arms and move into the embrace of this bearded giant.

"Ope this Liam. Liam this is my surrogate big brother Opie." Liam couldn't help but let out a breath. It wasn't Happy.

"Nice to meet you." Liam extended his hand.

"You to man."

"Come on I'll introduce you to everyone else." Nicole lead them towards the bar.

* * *

Clay was sat in the Chapel on the phone to Alvarez checking on how he was getting on with his guys, and also to tell him that Miles was almost done at getting the CTTV footage from Oswald's. As if on cue, just as he hung up the phone there was a knock on the Chapel doors.

"Come in." Clay norrmally would have laughed watching Miles nervously stumble through the doors, but today to much shit was going on to even see the funny side of anything. "You better be in here telling me that you have something." Clay snapped. He noticed that Miles fumbling only increased and he seemed more on edge. Clay winced at his behavior, it only meant one thing this had to be a Son. "Who is it?" He demanded rubbing his creased forehead.

"Uh...I think..You should probably just watch it." Miles placed the laptop in front of Clay and pressed the play button. Miles thought showing him would be much easier than telling him.


	17. Chapter 17

Everything Changes

Chapter Seventeen 

Nicole knew she should have trusted her gut, that was screaming at her that something was wrong, but she had to admit that when Clay had first took her outside of the clubhouse and asked if she would accompany him on a ride, she was intrigued, curious as to where he wanted to take her. But when he told her no-when she asked to go back in to get her bag and tell Liam where she was going- Nicole knew something was off. And now as they pulled up outside the warehouse she had followed Juice to only last night she knew she should have followed her gut and pulled out of Clay's embrace, and ran back inside to Jax. But she hadn't that damn Teller curiosity getting the better of her, meaning that she was here with Clay who was- if the ride was anything to go by-tense, with no phone and no one knowing where she was. She just knew nothing good was going to come from this.

But even with that thought she didn't expect what was about to happen.

* * *

Jax took a long much needed drag of his cigarette before letting his eyes fall back onto Liam. So far he had remained pretty quiet, letting his brothers lead the interrogation, well that was until Liam had let slip that he and Nicole had only been together for 9 months. Meaning that 5 months of Nicole's life was unaccounted for.

He tried to recall the conversation he had had with her the night she had come back. But she hadn't given much away, didn't even tell him that she was engaged to the man in front of him so why was he surprised that she had left out the fact that she had only been in LA for 9 months, the way she made it out she had been there all along.

And if it hadn't been for the shit Darby had spouted to the guys when he first reappeared in Charming he probably wouldn't be so worried.

"So where did you meet my cousin?" Jax tried to keep his voice casual as so not to alert any attention to his worry but failed to keep all the edge out of it.

"Uh...I actually met her in the weirdest of places. I was visiting a friend of mine at thi..."

"Where's Clay going with Nicole?" Gemma didn't care that she was interrupting the Fiancé she just needed to try and figure out what she had just witnessed between her husband and her niece.

Gemma had seen Clay take Nicole's arm in his hand and pull her towards his bike before speeding out of the lot. It wasn't right, none of it was, Clay's behaviour was all off and considering the ledge he was on at the moment with all this shit with the letters- even though she had told him it was over-Gemma was worried for her niece, and if she could count on anyone to either reassure her that she was being stupid or to help her keep Nicole safe it was her son.

"What do mean?" Jax was confused. If Nicole was going to leave he knew that she wouldn't just leave without say goodbye or leaving her fiancé in the clutches of her family where she knew that he would end up undergoing a grilling Samcro style. "There just talking..." Gemma shook her head.

"No. I've just watched them leave." Jax was on his feet, looking around the room until he saw the man he was looking for exit from the hallway.

"Hey." Jax strutted over to Miles who looked like a deer caught in the headlights. "What?"

"Nothing." Clay had told him to keep what he had found on the CCTV to himself, but standing in front of Jax, his VP Miles was finding it very hard indeed. It was no secret the love Jax had for his cousin and Miles was scared, more than what he had been when he told Clay, as to what the man's reaction was going to be when he found out.

"You tell me now or I swear I'll pull that fucking patch off your back myself." Jax seethed. The vibes that he was getting from Miles was unsettling and it made Jax nervous to think about what he had shown Clay, because he just knew that it had to with Nicole. _That gils going to be the death of me._

"Nicole was on the tape..."

"What tape?"

"The CCTV footage from the warehouse. She was there." Jax looked over his shoulder at Opie who was now on his feet approaching the two.

"You show Clay this?" Jax looked to his other side at his mother. To scared to open his mouth, afraid of what he might say Miles nodded. "Shit." Jax rubbed his hand across the rough of his beard. "You heading to the warehouse?"

"Yeah Clay wants me to take back the footage to Oswald."

"Okay you do that."

"Ope, your with me."

"What's going on?" Every head in the room turned to look at the outsider, before turning to Jax, seeking some sort of silent command on what way he wanted this to be handled.

"Family stuff. You sit pretty here, Piney and Mom will look after you. I'll bring your Fiancé back before you know it." Jax didn't wait for a response, instead headed straight out of the clubhouse door.

* * *

"We know one of yers tellin' da truth and one of yers not. Dis prove ya commitment to da club." Chibs slid one bullet into the chamber of the 9 mill. "Get through dis an we know you ad nothin' ta do wit dis."

"Pussy out it means you probably ripped us off." Kozik added, taking the attention of Rat and Phil.

Juice looked around the room he couldn't believe this was happening, two innocent men were about to play the life and death game of Russian Roulette and it was all because of him, because of his mistake. He didn't want anyone dying for his wrongs yet he found himself standing there saying nothing.

Rat shook his head violently as he stared at the gun that lay in front of him. This wasn't what he had signed up for, he thought joining the Sons Of Anarchy would be fun, a little dangerous sure, but nothing had prepared him for this. He knew on his mothers grave that he hadn't taken the brick of coke they were being accused of taking and he was pretty damn sure that neither had Phil, it just wasn't in his nature to be that devious he was a teddy bear. Sure he had a temper but a sneaky deviant side, never. Which left only one other scenario, someone else took it. Of course his first thought was the Mayan, who had been on duty with them, but then for the first time since this had started he remembered her.

He couldn't believe he had forgotten about her, she wasn't exactly easy to forget dressed in that tight blue dress that clung to every luscious curve she had. Her presence was so out of place he couldn't believe he hadn't thought about her earlier. Before he pieced any more of the puzzle together he watched Kozik slide the gun towards him and in a blind panic for his life the words were spilling from his mouth.

"Wait..wait there...there was..." Rat turned to Phil. "The girl..remember..she was..."

"Don't man." Every eye in the room was now on Phil and he knew it. Swallowing the lump in his throat Phil avoided eye contact with all the sons expect for one, Happy, who was standing just behind Rat. He never meant to but he couldn't help himself. He knew what Rat was about to say and all he could think about was the day he had walked in on Happy and a very naked Nicole lying beneath him. If Rat was to say what he thought he was about to then he was pretty sure Rat was going to end up with a bullet implanted into his skull without having to go through Russian roulette. So doing the only thing he could think of to shut Rat up Phil grabbed the gun and positioned it against his temple and pulled the trigger.

* * *

"Oh my god..." Nicole gasped as Phil pulled the trigger. She tried to shrink back out of the room she had been pushed into but Clay stopped her, pushing her further inside.

"Everyone out." Clay ordered as he looked around at his confused brothers. Ignoring the silent conversations happeing between his brothers Clay pushed Nicole even further into the room, making sure to keep hold of her as he waited for them all to leave.

Chibs nodded to Kozik and he followed his lead and grabbed Phil while Chibs grabbed Rat and dragged them outside.

Nicole was past worried now, she was scared, confused. Her eyes sought out Juice, who looked like he was about to pass out. She got a sickening thought in her stomach.

"Out." Clay shouted again, this time Juice listened as was out of the door in shot, not giving Nicole a second glance. "You to." Nicole spun around. She hadn't realised that there was anyone else left but there he was. Face unreadable as always but his dark eyes narrowed on her, and hers now on him.

She felt Clays grip on her tighten and she knew he was about to tell Happy to get out again but before anyone could do or say anything the door came barrelling open again.

Nicole broke eye contact with Happy and was so glad to see that it was Jax who had opened the door. He immediately pulled her from Clay. Nicole could see his chest heaving, his jaw flexing and she knew he was beyond mad. But sparing a look at Clay Nicole realised he either didn't notice or he didn't care about his stepsons rage, because he went to grab her again only this time Jax placed his body between them.

"What the hell Clay?"

"She took it." Clay's words hung in the air. Nicole looked between the three men desperately trying to figure out what the hell Clay was talking out because judging by the faces of Happy and Jax she was the only who didn't get what was going on.

"What?" Jax sighed hoping that he was hearing his stepfather wrong.

"She took the brick." Clay snapped this time losing a bit of his cool. Jax backed away trying to catch his breath. Pinching the bridge of his nose as he shook his head.

"No." Jax snapped back quickly, his eyes returning to Clay's.

"She was here last night it's on the god damn tape. Does she know about this, about Gallindo?" Clay watched as the answer to his question spread all over Jax's face. "Shit." Clay sighed rubbing a hand over his face. "Why am I not surprised that you were that stupid."

"She didn't do this Clay. Tell him Nic." When he didn't get an answer Jax's snapped his head over his shoulder to look at her hoping to god that he was right in defending her. Darby's words again coming back in his head.

Nicole had heard everything and knew Jax what was asking her, slightly begging her to prove him right and prove her innocence, but Nicole's eyes had found their way back to Happy's. She could see the anger settling behind those dark eyes of his with every word that Clay spat. And she couldn't rally blame him.

All the evidence was there it made sense. She shouldn't have been here last night. Her presence here last was completely off. She could easily clean up this mess and tell them the reason why she was here. That whole story of how the weird conversation she'd had with Juice the other day had made her nervous so nervous in fact that when she saw him speeding past her last night she couldn't help but follow him, hoping that wherever he was heading it would give her some answers as to what was up with the usually happy intelligence officer.

But instead it had only created more questions.

She had pulled her car behind some bushes so it was out of sight, before she continued to follow him on foot- which considering she was in 5 inch heels was a lot harder than she had originally thought. After watching him head into the warehouse and then return 10 minutes later looking nervous, Nicole hid herself out of sight as she watched him get back on his bike and drive away. Her curiosity unsatisfied Nicole had found herself lurking in the bushes waiting for Phil to leave her post giving her her in.

Even when she entered the warehouse she knew she shouldn't be doing it, but she was worried about Juice and she desperately wanted to know what he was up to.

She had tried the door to the room she was currently standing in but it was locked, and she knew whatever the Prospects were guarding was inside that room. And if the Sons were keeping something behind a locked door and guarded she knew it must be something important, dangerous, something they didn't want anyone to know about. And Nicole could only think one deal that the Sons were currently in that would make them go to such lengths of protection. Drugs.

Nicole felt sick as pieces of this ridiculous puzzle started to come together.

A brick was missing. A brick of coke no doubt. And Clau was accusing her of taking it. But she didn't that was the only thing she was a 100% about. What she wasn't a 100% about was Juice. She hoped Juice hadn't done something stupid. But unfortunately it was looking like he had.

"Nic." Nicole felt a hand on her arm. This time she looked up to find Jax's hands on her.

"I didn't do this Jay, I promise..." Nicole pawed at his jacket stopping him from looking away. She needed for him to believe her because she knew that there was noway she going to be able to explain what she was doing there especially as she wasn't willing to throw Juice under the bus especially as she didn't really know anything yet. "Jay..."

"I know..."

"If you didn't take it then what the hell were you doing here." And there was the question Nicole was dreading.

"Um...I...I." Nicole knew that her stuttering wasn't helping her look any less guilty. He eyes caught Happy's again and the look he was giving her made her want the ground to swallow he up. He was pissed, so pissed, and there was a good chance that her next words might piss him off even more. "I came here looking for you two." Nicole was now looking at Clay. "You never showed for the meal, I was pissed so I came looking for you. That's why I came here."

"See she didn't do this Clay, she didn't even know that the drugs were being kept here. Plus the door was locked." Clay scoffed in Jax's face as he approached him. Clay's eyes finding their way to Nicole.

"Like that's ever stopped her before." Jax shook his head in disbelief at Clays accusations. Yes she had been there last, yes she had a history with drugs maybe a more recent one if what Darby had said was true, even so Nicole wouldn't do this. She wouldn't betray he family and Jax knew that better than anyone. Only last year he had accused of the same betrayal Clay is now and it wasn't true back then and it certainly wasn't true now.

Clay on the other hand believed that it could only be Nicole. She was the last one in and he knew for damn that Juice hadn't taken it. He was a long serving patch he would never do that to his brothers. Whereas Nicole, well she had issues with drugs always had and maybe the fact she had knowledge of what was inside- he didn't believe for a second that Jax hadn't divulged that little piece of information to her- she may have been tempted. He didn't believe her bullshit lies of coming here to find him and Jax. It was to easy.

Finally loosing his temper Clay pushed Jax out of the way and reached for his niece again.

"Where is it?" Clay growled wrapping his large hands around her upper arms and shaking her as if to shake the answers out of her. "Where?"

"Clay." Nicole screamed taken by surprised from her Uncle's handsy outburst.

* * *

Happy had quietly stood back from the family argument that was unfolding in front of him but when he heard Clay shout at Nicole about taking the brick they were currently missing he turned his focus onto her.

He knew her history with drugs. Drugs were behind the death of her high school sweetheart. She had been so off her face on the stuff that she had driven the stolen car they were in head first into a wall. Although she had made it out alive, she had never been the same after that.

Drugs were a dirty business which is why he had voted against the deal with Gallindo. He had watched it destroy to many people, Kozik and Nicole being just two of them.

But they had also survied it come through the other end or at least he thought they had but it seemed that maybe Nicole had fallen back into old habits, and if she had he would personally force that shit out of her. Because the thought of her going back to that place was not something he wanted to witness again.

Even with those feelings Happy remained silent, although it was club business, it was also their family shit. And he didn't want to step in on that. It wouldn't be appreciated.

But then she started pleading her innocence to Jax, and even though he was looking directly into her eyes and could tell she was telling the truth he also saw that she was hiding something. But it wasn't the brick so that was one thing.

Clay however didn't seem to believe her even when she told him that she had been here looking for him and Jax. Happy watched his Presidents shoulders bunch up, and then he watched him lunge at Nicole and shake her why he screamed in her face, Happy, for the first time attempted to involve himself. But before he could pull Clay off her, Jax had beat him to it. Relieved he took a step back, although he made sure not to widen the gap as far as it was before, because Clay didn't look like was finished and neither did Jax.

"You touch her again I swear..." Although the rest of the threat died in Jax's rapid breaths, it hung heavily in the air. And Clay knew that he would follow through on that threat.

Nicole wiped her shaking hand ove her cheek wiping away her fallen tears. If she had know that her little adventure last night would lead to this, lead to her Uncle accusing her of stealing from her own family she wouldn't have bothered. She would have stayed at home curled up in bed with her Fiancé.

That was her life now, housewife, bar manager. Not Samco princess.

"She didn't do this Clay."

"She was on the GOD DAMN TAPE...How else do you explain this."

Nicole rolled her eyes as Jax and Clay continued to go back and forth repeating the same thing. Jax defending her, Clay accusing her. She wanted to leave. It was to much, she couldn't breath in there anymore. Catching Happys dark eyes that hadn't seem to leave her, was the final straw for Nicole.

Turning her back on all three of them she went for the door but as soon as her hand reached out for it Clay screamed at her again. She ignored it and opened the door anyway. As she was about to step outside the sound of gun shots echoed through the derelict warehouse.


	18. Chapter 18

Everything Changes

Chapter Eighteen 

Juice paced back and forth in the warehouse, his hand running over his mohawk. He couldn't believe this was happening, watching the prospects take the blame was one thing but Nicole...Nicole..he just couldn't let that happen.

Although no one had said a word since Jax had entered the room, Juice knew they were all thinking the same as him, he could see it on their faces. There was only one reason Clay would bring her here, he thought she took the brick, but he was wrong and no matter what they were all thinking whether they thought she had done it or not he was the only who knew the real truth which meant he was the only one who could put a stop to all this.

He had been stupid enough to think that he could pull this off but he never anticipated this, for her to be dragged into it. He no longer cared about the repercussions of admitting to his betrayal, he had to come clean not for him but for Nicole.

Juice grabbed his black zip up jacket off the side and pulled it on.

"You a'right bro?" Juice looked at Kozik. The strained look on his face reaffirmed to him that he was doing the right thing.

"Gotta piss."

Juice made his way to the place where he had stashed the brick the previous night. Pulling out the brick and placing the small amount of coke that he had pulled earlier in his jeans pocket. He started to make his way back to the warehouse when he heard Miles call out his name.

"What you doing out here?" Juice asked breathlessly keeping his back to Miles while he tried to think about what he was going to do next.

"Cutting through from the guard house. What are you do..." By the end of his sentence Miles had noticed the white package in Juice's hand. Juice rolled his eyes. Hearing Miles trail off Juice knew that he had been caught. Sighing he slowly turned to face Miles. His hands raised immediately in a surrendering motion as he looked down the barrel of his brothers gun.

"Jesus you took it."

"It's not want it looks like..."

"Really." Miles cocked his head in the direction of the warehouse. "Why don't you explain what it looks like to Happy..."

Juice paled at the thought. Happy was an enforcer, a killer, Juice had even seen him at work although not for long because his stomach couldn't stand it. Point was he knew what Happy was capable of. He had no limits when it came to protecting the club, so Juice's knew that the death he would receive from the killer would be anything but merciful. But Juice's wrong doings had consequences which Juice knew would end up in him being torn limb from limb, because his mistakes involved Nicole.

Juice still wasn't sure what exactly it was that the two had shared before they had gone inside, according to Nicole it was just sex but he believed differently. Spending time with Happy on the inside, watching how he reacted every time they had received a set back in the search for Nicole, he knew it was more than just sex well for the Killah anyway. Which shocked Juice but then he rationalised that everyone had a heart.

And it was then that his self preservation instincts kicked in. As long as they had the brick, that was all that mattered they didn't need him, or his confession. That's the conclusion Juice came to anyway because he wasn't ready to die at the hands of the Tacoma Killer.

Throwing the brick at Miles Juice charged at him intending to make a run for it, but Miles realised what Juice was about to do and managed to fire off a shot before he fell to the ground. His gun falling out of his hand and flying across the dirt.

As the bullet lodged into his thigh Juice fell to ground along with Miles and the gun.

They both started searching for the discarded gun knowing that it was the only way out of this situation. They scrambled around on the floor both trying to reach for the gun. Miles started punching the fresh bullet wound in Juice's thigh, making him scream out in pain. As Juice reached for his leg, Miles took advantage and used his brothers distraction to pull himself his feet as his hand reached for the knife strapped to his leg.

Juice watched terrified as Miles started to lunge at him, a knife in his hand. He knew if he let Miles near him that he would be dead. And just as he thought that this might be his last moment he caught sight of the gun just centimetres away from him.

It all happened so quickly. He barely registered his finger pulling back the trigger again and again till clip was emptied.

Juice just lay there in silence. He could feel the blood, Miles' blood on his face. He wanted to throw up but he knew that the shots would have been heard in the warehouse and that's when he realised the seriousness of what he had just done. He had killed a brother and less than two feet away from them was the missing brick which had led to all this mess.

* * *

Nicole was pulled back into the room as the shots continued to ring out. Jax pulled her around in his arms so that she was facing him. She watched his eyes roam over her, checking her for any damage. Thankfully there wasn't any not from the shooting anyway. As for her arms she wasn't sure she was going to come out unscathed from that attack.

"What the hell..." Clay was out the door in a shot, Jax hot on his heels. Nicole on instinct for the safely of her family went to follow Jax, but once again her efforts to leave were stopped when another arm wrapped around her waist.

"Happy." It was her calling out his name that made Jax turn around. Looking passed Nicole at Happy, she watched her cousin nod. She knew it was a silent agreement to keep her locked up for a little longer until the threat had been dealt with. She understood her cousins decision but why did it have to be Happy of all people.

Giving up the fight against Happy's hold because she knew it was a waste of time. She allowed him to lift her off her feet as he kicked the door closed and turned them around so that his back was to the door, before he put her back onto her feet.

She wanted to move, she should have moved. But instead she stood there, her body pressed way to closely to his than it should be.

Her breathing quicked with the closeness and she felt her cheeks flush, she hated that she was reacting to his closeness like this especially as he seemed completely unfazed by it all.

She tucked her hair behind her ears, diverted her eyes from his, folded and unfolded her arms all in an attempt to try and gain back some of her composure. She tried everything except for stepping away. She knew that the distance would give her what she was looking for but for some reason she just couldn't step away from him.

Ever since she could remember Happy had always given her a sense of safety, like no matter what happened she was protected. And he had proved that time after time. He gave her a different sense of security than Jax did. Happy could comfort her in ways Jax couldn't, and she needed that right now. 14 months ago she would have made a move, lent on her tiptoes and kissed him forcefully and he would respond giving her what she needed and making her feel that she was untouchable. Even though she knew she couldn't go there it didn't mean she could enjoy this, it was the closest she could get without crossing that line.

* * *

Happy watched as she tried to busy herself so that she didn't have to look at him, he loved that he was flustering her, it had been 14 months since he had seen her this flustered, the last time was in the Chapel just before he laid her on top of the Redwood his hands all over her tight body. He liked seeing her like this, he missed seeing her this way, a reaction that he only seemed to ignite.

But forgetting that for a minute he was interested as to why she hadn't stepped away from him. It was obviously his closeness was making her nervous and the easiest way to put an end to that was to walk away from, put some distance between them. But she didn't move an inch.

Infact he could have sworn she edged closer to him. And then he realised what she was doing and he wasn't surprised.

Her Uncle had just accused her of betraying her family, that shit must have brought up old wounds leaving her vulnerable. He'd seen her do this before, a lot of the time with Jax but more recently with himself. She needed reassurance that everything was going to be okay that she was going to be okay.

He hooked his finger underneath her chin, tilting her head back so that she had to look at him.

"You a'right?"

"Don't." Nicole's voice broke as she pulled away from his touch. Obviously she had reached some sort of limit.

He continued watching her as she increased the gap between them, her fingers running through her hair. When her back was to him he heard the distinct sound of a sniffle indicating that she had finally lost the battle with her tears which she has been fighting since Clay hauled into the room. He didn't know what to say, didn't really know how she was handling this but judging by the tears it wasn't well.

"You know being accused of betraying your family once hurts but twice..." He watched her shoulders move up and down as her hair moved side to side from her shaking her head. "Well that is just like a knife to the heart."

"You shouldn't have been here." As soon as the words were out Happy knew he shouldn't have said it.

Nicole huffed before spinning round, her face hurt as she stared at him. Her mouth opened and closed a few times and he knew that she was thinking about what to say so he just waited.

"You believe Clay." It wasn't a question she was making a statement, a wrong one but a statement none the less. He shouldn't have waited. "Why am I not surprised. God I'm glad I'm out of here today." Nicole was hurt. It seemed no matter what she did she always ended up on the wrong side of everything, always ended up hurt. She shouldn't be surprised it was part of the life, but didn't mean it hurt any less. " I'm so over this shit."

Happy lost it. He was done with this attitude of hers. Yeah Clay may have been out of line accusing her but she wasn't exactly the innocent party. She had fucked up, and it was about time someone pulled her up on that. And it looked like he was going to be that someone.

"You going to run again?" He didn't shout but his voice was loud enough to make her know that he wasn't fucking around. "Things get a little fucking tough and you bail."

"I'm not listening to this." She rolled her eyes as Happy blocked her exit.

"Don't you get tired of that shit?" Happy barked in her face.

"Get out of my way Happy." She tried in vain to get past him but Happy just keeping using his body to block her way. "Move."

"Why so you can run back to you Fiancé, cry on his fucking shoulder bout how bad your family is." Nicole managed to dodge past him this time but she didn't get very far before Happy caught her arm spinning her back to face him and pushing her up against the wall. Happy smirked at her. There were no tears in her eyes and he could feel her fighting beneath his hold. This was the girl he knew, respected. This was the girl who had killed a man to save her own life, this was the girl that handled her shit, not the weak Princess who ran away. But he still wasn't done with her.

"You ever stop to think about the shit you leave behind." Happy moved his hand to her jaw, grabbing her face roughly. "Why, why did you run?" He demanded as he pressed harder.

Nicole blinked rapidly. He was hurting her but something had changed in him and she was pretty sure even if she begged him he wouldn't stop. And Nicole didn't want him to.

This had started off as Happy defending Clay, pulling her up on her shit. Shit that she knew she was guilty of even if she did lie to herself and tell herself everyone else was to blame. But as soon as he mentioned her fiancé, it changed and Nicole knew that this conversation was no longer about Clay or what had just happened between them.

"We tried everything. I..." Nicole wasn't ready for it, she didn't want him to go but that's exactly what he did. He backed away from her like he had just received an electric shock or something. He paced over to the other side of the room, creating as much distance between them as possible without leaving the room. He hadn't forgot that he was still on guard duty.

She rubbed her jaw, but her eyes never left him. He looked like a caged animal right now and Nicole wondered how she should handle this. He was obviously pissed at her. Pissed at the fact that she had run and not stuck around to help her family. Nicole had often regretted that, she should have been there for Gemma, Abel but she was selfish, consumed by her own pain. And true to form she ran away. If she had known where it would have taken she would have stayed put in Charming, because just like every other time, running was so not worth it all she ended up with was more heartache.

"I'm sorry." She knew that she sounded weak and she tried to sound more confident but she was so upset that she had caused Happy this much pain that she didn't know what to do, how to make up for it.

"Don't fucking say that." That response shocked her, but she was more shocked when he started to walk towards her again. "Don't give me the bullshit I'm sorry I'm not Jax."

"Hap..." She could see the anger in his eyes and it worried her. "I thought Jay was going to be killed I thought you were going to kill him...I just...I couldn't be here for that." Happy had to admit he understood that. But he still didn't like that she ran and he hated it even more that she was about to it again.

"What's your excuse now."

"I...I..." Nicole stuttered. "I have a new life now Hap."

"Bullshit." Nicole who had let her eyes fall from his because she couldn't look at him anymore quickly returned when he came to stand in front of her leaving barely if any gap between them.

"I can't do this..." She wanted to put distance between them, she needed that distance from him. He was crowding her head making her think things she really shouldn't be, remembering dreams she should never of had in the first place.

Happy just watched as she headed for the door. He wasn't going to stop her, run after her, beg her, he wasn't that guy. If she wanted to run then she was going to no matter what anyone said. Nicole never did anything that she didn't want to.

But just as she opened the door he remembered why they were trapped inside together in the first place. He strode over to her in seconds just managing to push the door shut before she stepped outside.

"Hap..."

"You can't go out there." He whispered into her ear. When he felt her nod he pushed away from the door, although he didn't make an attempt to move away any further.

"You know you don't have to stay in here with me." After their...well argument...she could tell that he was tense and she knew that the fact that shit was going down just outside and he was unable to help his brothers, was annoying the hell out of him. "I'll be okay." She pulled a face when he rolled his eyes at her.

"I'm staying. Someone needs to keep an eye on your ass."

"Guess I can always count on you for that." She smirked, glad to see a smile twitch on his lips as well.

The silence that had fallen between came to and end when the door came flying open, sending Nicole tumbling forward straight into Happy's arms.

* * *

Jax looked down at Miles' bloody body, the package of coke nestled just inside his cut. He spat on him, it was the only thing he could do, if he was still breathing Jax would do a lot more. This whole time he had taken it, and it wasn't only that he had stolen from his brothers that made Jax want blood it was the fact that the asshole had pointed this shit at Nicole so he could save his ass. Jax would love to kill him all over again for that shit.

"I told you she didn't do this." Jax spat as Clay came to join him.

"Yeah." Clay already felt like a piece of shit he really didn't need Jax to pull him up on it. He did what he had to do as President and that's what he was when he spoke to Nicole he was the mother charter president not her uncle. He'd apologise to her further down the line, not for accusing her but maybe the way he accused her. But that was on him he didn't need Jax sticking his nose in where it was wanted nor needed. "We need to talk to Juice."

"Yeah."

After listening to what Juice had to say Jax and Clay stepped away from the rest to discuss the plan.

"We need this cleared up before Romeo comes."

"Agreed. You call Tara tell her were going to need her, have Chibs take Juice to your place." Jax nodded. "I'll call Alvarez." Jax nodded again. "I want the propspects to get rid of the body, little lesson for them what happens to people who cross Samcro. Get Hap to watch over them."

"I'll tell Kozik to take Nic home." This time it was Clay's time to nod.

Kozik headed into the warehouse but as he pushed open the door he watched Nicole fly into Happy's arms. Kozik paused for a moment and watched as the two awkwardly tried to figure out how to part from one another. The tension between them filled the whole room, and Kozik noticed the way Happy was looking at her. It was a look that she didn't need.

"Hap, Clay wants you outside, Nic your with me." Kozik watched as the couple continued to stare at one another like they hadn't even noticed his presence.

"Hap..."

"Yeah." Happy made sure that Nicole was steady on her feet before leaving her and making his way outside, ignoring the look that Kozik was giving him.

* * *

Jax walked into the clubhouse, it was late and he was bone tired. It had been a long day but he was thankful that the meet with Romeo had gone well. The coke had be delivered and so had there money. But it was the outer pressures that were bothering Jax, Bobby was disgusted by what had happened today, the fact that Nicole had been dragged into all of this was enough for the old man which is why he dragged Clay straight into the Chapel, alone.

Jax ran a hand over his face, but before he could let out a breath Liam came up to him demanding to know where Nicole was. Truth was Jax didn't know. She shouldn't have been back by now but she was nowhere to be seen and neither was Kozik.

"We have a flight leaving in an hour and a half." Jax just looked Liam square in the eyes shaking his head.

"Ain't gonna happen."

"But?"

"Look, your best bet is not to ask questions. Just go back with Gemma and wait there."

"But we're..."

"You ain't leaving tonight end off. Just go home, take Nic's stuff. She won't be long." He watched as Liam nodded and headed to the bar to pick up Nicole's bag. It was obvious that he was out of his element.

Jax's focus was taken away from his cousins fiancé when he watched Happy walk into the clubhouse. Jax couldn't help but call his name as he moved closer. He knew full well that locking his cousin up with Happy wasn't going to end well and he wondered if that was why she still wasn't back.

Liam was getting Nicole's bag ready when he heard that fateful name _Happy. _He had longed to know who this man was but now that the time was here he wasn't sure if he wanted to know. But there he was turning around to look at the man who apparently his soon to be wife had been eye fucking.

And he was shocked. There standing in front of him, responding to the name Happy, was one of the men he had crossed off his list purely because the thought of Nicole being with him terrified him, as did the man himself. The man had an intimidating presence. He was the sort of man that you wouldn't want to meet down a dark ally and if you didn't you make it out of that ally.

Everything about today had confused Liam, he had no idea why or even how Nicole had lived in this life. It was fucked up, everyone in this room seemed some sort of version of fucked up. It was eerie seeing Nicole so at home in this place. But then he remembered that she had left it, turned her back on this life and was more than happy to start making a new life with him. The date was set plans were in motion and they had even discussed starting a family. Yes she could be distant and she wasn't very forthcoming in admitting her feelings. Rarely telling him that she loved him. But she had chosen him. And that was all that mattered. He just needed to get her out of here take her back to her real home, their home.

Happy may have been listening to Jax but he wasn't looking at him. He was staring back and the polo shirt wearing prick who had the nerve to stare at him. When Happy finally won the stare out and the prick coward away from him he turned to look at Jax.

"I don't know where she is." Happy could tell that Jax was hoping that he had the answers he was looking for.

"Did something happen today with you two?" Jax dropped his voice so only the two of them could hear.

"No." Happy didn't see the point in telling Jax that they had argued especially as they seem to end on a good note.

"Okay." Jax clapped him on the back and Happy noticed him edging towards the door.

"You heading out?"

"Yeah." Happy watched Jax's eyes leave his for a moment. Obviously he was looking at Liam as he was the only other person in the bar. This lead Happy to believe that this was about Nicole, he was going to go find her.

"You need a hand?"

"Nah I got this. Go clean up man."

"A'right."

Happy made sure to throw another deadly look at the prrick before making his way down the hall. He was tired it had been a long day and all he wanted to do was shower, down a bottle of Jack and maybe get blown but when he opened the door to his room and saw a plastic bag sitting on the bed, a bag he knew he hadn't left there he knew his day was about to get a little longer.

Emptying the contents he was shocked by what came tumbling out. It was a Samcro hoodie, his Samcro hoodie, the one that Nicole had been wearing the day he had been arrested. He sat down on the edge of the bed, his had running over his head and face. He had no idea what to do, he wasn't used to this sort and shit and it was a lot more complicated than it had been 14months ago, and one of those complications had just tried to stare him down in the bar. As he buried his face in his hands he could smell her perfume. He wondered if it was the jacket or if it was him either way that scent just reaffirmed the obvious. He was screwed.

* * *

Kozik watched Nicole who was sat across from him, picking at the label on her Corona. Just before they hit Charming Nicole shouted over the roar of the engine asking him to take her anywhere but home or the clubhouse. Kozik didn't object or question instead took her to this little dive bar nestled on the outskirts of Charming boarders.

They had been sat there for a good twenty minutes and she hadn't said anything, she had just sat there playing with the label of her beer and taking the occasional sip.

It didn't take a genius to figure out why Clay had dragged her to the warehouse, it was about the drugs. So he got why she was pissed and why she probably didn't want to return to the clubhouse, but Kozik wasn't blind either. He had seen the way Happy was looking at her when she was in his arms. Something had gone down between the two and although he would like to know he wasn't about to pry, and the thing he wanted to know more than anything was if she was okay.

He knew from personal experience how hard it can be in the first year of sobriety, he had fallen off the wagon twice in his first year and the reasons for his fall were nothing compared to what she was having to deal with.

"Wanna talk about it?" Nicole shook her head. She figured he was talking about Clay and right now she really didn't want to about him. "Okay." Kozik took a pull from his own beer. "But you know i'm here if you change your mind." This time she nodded but still said nothing. It was starting to make him a little nervous, but he knew that they had to do this at her pace. If he pushed she would just lock everything down.

10 minutes and two beers later she finally spoke.

"Do you think I'm selfish?"

"That what Happy told you?" Okay so he was pushing a little but he really just wanted to know what was making her act like this.

"Piney. He was the one who came to LA he was the one who told me about Jay, tried to get me to come home. I told him no and he called me selfish."

"Your not selfish Nicky far from it."

"But I ran. When Gemma, Abel...when they needed me I left. That's selfish right?" Kozik blew out a deep breath, his hand wiping over his mouth.

"Your were hurtin' you did what you needed to. You couldn't be here, everyone understood that..."

"Because they expected me to do it...expected me to run, it's what I always do right." She downed what was left of her beer before signalling over the waitress, to order a tray shots. _What the fuck had Piney said to her. _Nicole fell silent again, she was avoiding looking at him, instead deciding to watch the waitress who she had ordered her shots with. She had barely put the tray onto the table when Nicole took her first shot, which was quickly followed by another.

"Nicky, you sure that's a good idea?" She just looked up him and took another shot.

"I can't take anything else" She snapped banging the shot glass on the table.

"You feel like you want something else." Nicole shook her head, drugs were actually the last thing she wanted right now. Even if she did want to the edge off, drugs were a no no, the tequila would just have to do.

"What time is it?"

"7. Why somewhere you need to be?"

"Right now I'm supposed to be at the airport, getting ready to run again."

"Your not running Nicky." Nicole raised her brow. "You're sitting here instead of an airport lounge so technically you're not running...yet." He gave her a wink as he picked up one of the shots and downed it. He was glad his little remark made her smile. If only slightly it was a defiant improvement.

"I don't know what I'm doing anymore."

"Do any of us really know what were doing. This life you've gotta just roll with it, no point even trying to figure this shit out." Kozik watched her take another shot before biting down her lip as her finger twirled the ring on her necklace. "This bout Hap?" That got her attention. But she never said anything, but he knew he was right. "Look I don't know what the deal was with you two..."

"There is no deal with us." She snapped defensively making Kozik laugh into his beer. "What?"

"That bullshit. From what I saw today you two looked bout ready to jump one another's bones." He was right Nicole did want him, even after he'd pulled up on all her shit, she wanted him.

"I'm with Liam."

"Well that's that then." Kozik leant across the table. "But wanna tell me why you're sitting here with me, instead of some fancy airport lounge with your guy?" Koaik didn't even bother to wait for her to answer, she wouldn't give him a straight one anyway. "You like this guy, I can see why he's safe. I guessin with the shit you've been through you probably need that. But he ain't the kind of safe you need."

"And Happy is?" Kozik shrugged.

"I can't say that but I know this Liam dude ain't your type, he won't be able keep you satisfied, not now you know that Jax is alive."

"And how do you that?"

"Because I know what it takes to satisfy you." Nicole rolled her eyes as Kozik wriggled his eyebrows suggestively at her. She slapped his arm before taking another shot, Kozik joined her. "All I'm saying is your doubting it because if you weren't, you wouldn't be here." He was right but Nicole wasn't about to admit that to him, she couldn't bare to see that cocky smug smile of his she'd seen it enough already.

"I don't know what i'm doing."

"Gathered that much."

"What should I do?"

"Ah..sweetheart I can't help ya with that one, that's on you. But I will tell ya that you need to figure that shit out quick. Hap's not a man who likes to share, that shit could get ugly."

"Yeah I know. There's stuff to consider."

"I bet." Kozik took the last shot. "So you ready to head back?" Nicole shook her head.

"You mind if we sit here a bit longer."

"Nope." He motioned over the waitress.

* * *

Hey lovely's just want to say thank you for all the reviews and adds I love hearing what you have to say and I love knowing that people are reading my story. Now I don't normally use music in the Nicole stories that I have written unlike my other stories but I have a song for Nicole and Happy that I think sums them up. For those who have followed this series from the start with Home Sweet Home will know that originally I had Nicole paired with Juice but as I continued writing the story the more I felt the two didn't feel right together. And I just happened to be writing a Happy/Nicole scene when I was listening to this song and suddenly it made sense to me, they made sense to me. The song is called 37 Stitches by Drowning Pool and I feel that it sums up Happy and Nicole's relationship. If you haven't heard it give it a listen and it might help you understand them as a pairing. Anyway thanks again and I hope you enjoyed this chapter and don't forget to let me know what you think xxx


	19. Chapter 19

Everything Changes

Chapter Nineteen 

Juice limped his way down the hall to the bar. He tried sleeping but it wasn't happening. Every time he closed his eyes he saw Miles' face. Rubbing his hand over his tired face he pulled a bottle of Jack from behind the bar and took a seat on one of the worn leather couches.

He had never killed anyone like that, and he had never killed a brother. Miles was innocent, it should have been him that was buried in an unmarkrd grave not Miles. With that thought he took another sip of the Whiskey.

It was two hours later when he stirred again. Apparently half a bottle of Whisky combined with pain meds that Tara had given him for his leg, was enough to make him sleep and keep his demons at bay. But when he opened his eyes he was shocked to see Nicole sitting opposite him.

"Morning." She smiled at him so sweetly that Juice felt sick with guilt. "Here." She pushed the cup of coffee she had in her hand across the table towards him before getting up and walking into the kitchen and returning to her seat with another cup off coffee in her hand.

Nicole eyed the half drunk bottle of Whiskey on the table. This was the second time she had found him drowning himself in a bottle of Whiskey, a drink that was not a usual for him.

"You okay?" Its was a stupid question considering what she had been told last night.

She had been shocked when Kozik told her that it had been Miles that had stolen the coke and it had been Juice who had killed him. She wasn't a fool, Juice may come across as a bit of doofus sometimes, always the butt of the others jokes but Juice was a son. If he didn't have what it took he wouldn't be sitting across from her now, a fully patched member. So it wasn't the fact that Juice had killed Miles that had shocked her, it was how he had done it which had sent her into a state of confusion.

It had been a brutal murderer.

And judging by the state of the man in front of her it was bothering him to. But she had a feeling that it wasn't just that. She was still unsure about what had happened yesterday, about what her mind was piecing together and watching him now the way he couldn't keep still it seemed that her suspicions may have weight.

"What time is it?" She smirked at the way he avoided even her simplest of questions. She wondered how he was going to handle her harder questions.

"A little after 6."

"Your here early."

"Spent the night. Got a little drunk, Koz thought it would be best if I stayed here." Juice nodded as he took another pill, washing it down with a mouthful of coffee. "What happened yesterday, keeping you up?" It was direct she knew that but then again this was serious she didn't have time to mess around because if what she was thinking was true Juice was in a lot of trouble and could be endangering the rest of her family.

"Uh...no..my leg...I couldn't sleep." Juice stuttered. "I better go get ready we have a vote to get in." He eased himself onto his feet. But before he could make his way around the table Nicole was standing in front of him. She knew. He could see it in her eyes, the fear and worry. She knew that something was going on and he knew that Nicole was a smart girl she may not have details but she would figure it out.

"Juice..."

"I gotta go." He moved her aside but Nicole caught hold of his wrist.

"What's going on?Talk to me." Juice just pulled his wrist free and disappeared down the hall. He didn't look back at her but he could feel her eyes on his back.

* * *

Nicole stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around her body before stepping back into the room where Kozik was still passed out on the bed. She was drunk when they had come back but not that drunk that she couldn't have gone home, she just couldn't face it. She knew that Liam would be worried about where she was, and she did feel guilty she hadn't even called him even though she had had several missed calls from him.

When they returned to the clubhouse they grabbed a bottle of tequila and a couple of glasses and retreated back to Jax's room. Kozik did remind her that as an official Samcro member that he did now have his own dorm but Nicole refused, she felt more comfortable in Jax's room. The scent of him comforting her.

She smiled to herself as Kozik rolled over so he facing her. He had been so good with her last night, he never once asked any questions instead he had just let her ramble on and Nicole actually had to admit, with the exception of the Juice situation she actually felt a lot better about everything. Lighter even.

She had confessed about where she had disappeared to the night of the arrest, and how she had begged Darby to kill her. Even though she could tell that he wanted to leave her and go after Darby he managed to keep himself put and continued to listen to her as she explained how he started drugging her, until she was hooked. His plan was to kill her slowly watch her fall to pieces in front of his eyes. According to Darby that was a much more satisfying way to kill her than putting a bullet in her skull. Again she watched Kozik's jaw clench, but again he didn't move.

She had been happy to wakeup this morning to find him still there, just like he had promised. He had also promised that he would keep her and her secrets safe. And it was that promise that had helped her finally come to a decision.

Turning her back, she started routing through Jax's draws for a t-shirt but was pleasently surprised to find some of the clothes that she had left behind still folded neatly in his draw. The smile on her face grew bigger, it seemed that he never gave up on her, none of them had.

When she returned from the bathroom again, this time fully dressed in ripped skinny jeans and a baggy grey deep v neck t-shirt, Kozik was still asleep. Juice had told her that they had a vote to get in, and if that was true it was nearing 7.15 which meant that Kozik needed to get up.

"Hey...Hey.." She nudged him with her bare foot. "Koz wake up..."

"Hmmm..." Kozik moaned as he started to stir. She laughed, he looked like a little child.

"Wake up..." Thinking that she was getting no where she bent down towards his face and was about to raise her hand to slap his cheek when all of a sudden his hand snapped out and caught her wrist and she was pulled onto the bed and was flat of her back with Kozik hovering over her. "Finally." Kozik looked over at the alarm clock.

"You better have a good reason for waking me up this early."

"I do. But first..." Nicole leant forward and kissed his cheek.

"What was that for?"

"Last night. Not judging me." Kozik nodded.

"Can't exactly judge you. I've been there to...Well maybe not the begging someone to kill me part." He watched her eyes fall from his. Balancing his weight on his one arm he used his other hand to tilt her face towards his so that she had to look at him. "Last night I didn't ask questions. But you know I have some right." Nicole nodded. "I will sort this, you won't have to worry about Darby or any of that shit."

"Thank you."

"Don't need your thanks Nicky. I'm doing this because I want to, you understand?." She nodded again. "So you made a decision?"

"Yes." Kozik laughed and quickly rolled off her. Nicole started to laugh with him.

"So what's this reason you woke me up again?"

"You have church, apparently a vote to get in." Kozik turned his head to look at her.

"I don't anything bout this." Nicole raised her hands. His messing tone now angry.

"That's what Juice said this morning...don't shoot the messenger." Kozik leaned over and checked his cell where there was a message from Jax telling him about church. He obviously hadn't heard it last night.

"Well I better get ready then." Kozik eased himself off the bed and headed for the door.

"Good, don't forget to brush your teeth, you have the worst morning breath."

"Bitch." He gave her the finger before closing the door behind him.

* * *

It seemed that Juice hadn't been lying. Everyone was gathered in the bar, including Piney. You would have to be blind, deaf and dumb to miss the tension that was engulfing the clubhouse bar. This was serious and it seemed that everyone one knew it. Nicole walked around the clubhouse with a pot of coffee filling up their empty cups while they waited for Jax and Clay who were already in the Chapel, to come out and call them in.

"Looking good sweetheart." Nicole smiled at Piney lifting up the pot asking him if he wanted a refill. He didn't. He reached over and picked up the bottle of tequila from the table next to him. Nicole smiled. "Seem to be missing a bottle of this."

"Really." She replied in a mocking tone.

"You wouldn't happen to know anything bout that would you?" Nicole shrugged her shoulders as Piney chuckled. "Glad to see the old Nicole back."

"Feels nice to be back." She winked at him and continued her way around the room. Happy was the next person in line for a refill. "You want some?" He gave the nod and she started to pour him a cup. "Bout yesterday." She quickly checked to make sure that no one was listening, thankfully they weren't. "I'm not gonna..." She stopped when she heard the clubhouse door open. Liam was standing there and she watched his eyes dart from her to Happy, he only looked away when Happy turned around to look at him.

Before any words could be spoken everyone's attention in the bar- except Nicole her eyes remained on Liam- was on the Chapel doors that were now open.

Clay must have silently motioned the rest of the Sons inside because she never heard him speak, but she did hear the shuffling sound of their combined feet.

"Nic.." Finally tearing her eyes from Liam Nicole looked over her shoulder to see Jax still standing in the door. Everyone else now seated around the table. "You gonna be al'right out here?"

"Yeah." He nodded and stepped back inside the room closing the door behind him. "You want something to drink?" She asked pathetically. Liam just shook his head and she knew that there would be only one thing he wanted. Answers.

* * *

"There's a challenge on the table. New President." Clay watched the wave of shock sweep over his brothers. He looked over at Bobby.

Last night after returning to the clubhouse Bobby had pulled him into the Chapel. He was fuming after what had gone down at the warehouse. Well more Nicole's involvement. Clay tried to explain but when that didn't work Clay lost it and told him that Nicole was none of his business and that he could treat her anyway he wanted, she was his niece not his. That's when Bobby pulled the officer challenge card. A challenge that Clay had no choice but to accept.

"I don't think we need the formalities." Clay continued to glare at Bobby. "You want the chair."

"Ain't got no choice." Bobby answered. Jax looked at Bobby who was on his left. He looked uncomfortable, this was obviously something that he didn't really want to do and that he was only doing this because he thought it was right for the club. If it had been any other time Jax probably would have found himself siding with the older man who he looked up to. But Jax had his own reasons for wanting this Cartel deal to keep going and it was those reasons that he would be voting against the older man.

Clay blew out a breath. "Yay or Nay...Bobby taking the gavel. Nay." With Clay's vote on the table it moved to Tig.

Tig looked at his president and then at Bobby. The two of them had found themselves having many a conversation about the new alliance that Jax and Clay shared. Bobby had more than once made it clear that he thought Clay was shutting them out and the fact that Jax was now backing Clay shit was going to end badly. Tig didn't want to believe it. Yes he had noticed that the King and Prince seemed tight on this deal but he refused to believe that Clay was pushing him out. He was Clay right hand, had been for years. Clay wouldn't lock him out and Tig couldn't...wouldn't turn his back on Clay even if Bobby was right. Looking back at Clay he gave his vote.

"Nay."

Chibs was next. He stared straight ahead at Bobby who was sat across from him. The room was deadly silent as they waited for his vote but before he could give it shots rang throughout the room as glass shattered to the floor.

* * *

"Did you spend the night with him?" Nicole placed the coffee pot on the bar.

"No." When she looked back at him she saw the relief wash over him. It was going to be short lived.

"I was worried. Your Uncle dragged you out of here, you missed the flight. I tried calling you but you never answered. But at least your okay. I have anot..."

"Liam. Stop." The panicked look reappeared on his face. "Liam we ne..." She never got to finish what she was about to say because she was cut off by the sound of gun shots and breaking glass.

"LIAM." Nicole shouted as more glass broke around them. She sunk to the floor and just caught sight of Liam disappearing behind the bar.

She heard the doors fly open behind her and with a quick glance over her shoulder she saw them all run out, all of them armed. Her eyes darted back to Liam when she heard him yell. She went to go to him but before she could she felt someone grab her.

"You hurt?" Nicole shook her head in answer to Jax's question. He nodded and left her side and headed outside where shots were still being fired. Nicole watched as the rest of them followed him. Her eyes met Happy's briefly and she nodded at him telling him that she was okay.

"Stay down." She nodded at his order.

* * *

Jax looked around at the mess in front of him. The gates had been busted, there were bullet holes all over the walls of the clubhouse and Tig had his gun pressed against the temple of one of the shooters they had managed to catch.

It was a mess and he knew that this had just woken up the whole of Charming, meaning it wouldn't be long before their favorite Sheriff turned up. They needed to get this shit cleared and quick. And just when he thought it couldn't get any worse Piney presented him a bag of heads. One them a Son.

Rubbing his hand over his face he started walking back inside the clubhouse, hoping that he wouldn't find another one.

* * *

"Are you okay?" Nicole asked Liam who was now on his feet clutching his shoulder. When she got to her feet she noticed the blood dripping down his fingers. "Shit...you've been hit."

"You think." She was shocked by his shouting. "I've been FUCKING SHOT...SHOT.."

"You need to calm down." Nicole had seen this happen before. He was freaking out and it wasn't going to help him. She could see that he was sweating, if he continued like this he was going to work himself up and pass out.

"CALM DOWN...CALM DOWN...I'VE BEEN SHOT..." Nicole reached out. Hoping that he would let her look at his shoulder, but he didn't instead he pushed her away from him. And just her luck it was at that point Jax entered, followed by Chibs and Happy. All three men looking pissed, and she didn't think it was just because of the shooting.

"Nic?"

"He's been shot." Chibs step forward and tried to examine the cut but Liam hit his hand away aswell.

"I need ta check yeh wound." Nicole could tell that Chibs was losing his patience, they all were.

"Liam." Nicole moved closer to him. "Please just let him look at you he can help you."

"Help me. It's because of them that I got shot in the first place." Liam snapped at her before grabbing her arm. "I'm taking you out of here you don't belo..."

"Hey." Jax went to pull Liam off his cousin but was beaten to the punch...literally. Happy came from nowhere and threw a solid right hook that knocked Liam clean out.

"Hap..." Nicole dropped beside Liam who was sprawled out on the floor. "What the hell?"

"We don't have time for that shit." Happy growled in his defense as Nicole just looked up at him.

"He's right Nic." Nicole looked at her cousin. "We need to get you both out of here before Roosevelt shows up. Hap put him in Nicole's car. Nic go back to Gemma's." Jax turned to Chibs. "You go with her. Clean him. I'll call you later let you know what's going on."

Chibs and Happy jumped into to action. Both of them picking up Liam's limp body and carying it outside. Before Nicole could follow them Jax stopped her.

"You okay?"

"Yeah."

"He grab you like that before?" Nicole kissed his cheek. She loved him so much, loved the way he was always watching out for her. She knew he was asking her this because of her history with Ryan. She also knew that he still blamed himself a little bit for how everything went down. And she knew he would hate himself if he dropped the ball on her again. Hense the question. But this time he had nothing to worry about.

"No. He's just in shock. You okay?"

"No."

"Any idea who did this?"

"Lobos." He saw the confused look on her face. "There another Cartel. Apparently the Gallindo and Lobos are at war."

"Jay." Her voice was full of sympathy.

"Look we'll talk later. You need to get out of here I want you clear of this shit before Roosevelt gets here." She understood that and was not about to argue.

"Be careful. I love you." This time he kissed her, and hugged her briefly before pulling away and pushing her towards the door.

* * *

At the warehouse everyone waited impatiently for Gallindo to arrive. Happy had done his best, put his skills to good use but the Lobo had said nothing and they needed answers quickly.

Roosevelt was sniffing around and the bullshit story they had spun him about the shots being fired by a rival garage was just going to make the Sheriff dig deeper because it was a bullshit excuse and they both knew it.

This was getting messy, more than Jax or even Clay had ever imagined.

"Gallindo." The Mayan VP shouted. _Thank god._ Jax thought to himself.

"You told us we didn't have to worry bout this war state side." Clay reminded Luis as he entered the warehouse. Clay was beyond pissed. Everything that had this morning. The shooting, the bag of heads, it just gave Bobby more sway. None of his bothers would want to continue a deal that was getting them this dirty.

"What's our guy sayin'?" Luis asked as he casually strolled towards the Lobo.

"Nothing." Jax answered him. Luis nodded As one of the men that was accompanying him placed a suitcase on top of the barrel and opened it.

"He's defiantly Lobo. Ex military." Luis pulled a syringe from the suitcase.

"What's that for?" Happy asked intrigued.

"Sodium Pentothal. It will get him talking." Happy held the man still as Luis injected him.

Luis had been right it hadn't taken long for the Lobo to start talking. Now Jax, Clay, Luis, Alvarez and Rafi the Mayan VP were standing outside discussing what the Lobo had said.

"That Lobo said there was a rat in your crew with ties to Nogales."

"He's lying." Alvarez answered defensively.

"It don't matter Mayan or Son that bitch is dead." Jax shouted, repeating the same words he had spat yesterday when they realised they were down a brick.

"That guy is full of shit."

"No he's full of truth serum." Luis reminded Alvarez. "And if he said that Lobo is getting intel from a Mayan. Then he's not lying."

"Mayan with family in Nogales. Who would that be Marcus?" Alvarez turned to look at Clay. The Mayan president tried to think about which one of his brothers would betray him and one name came to mind. Pedro.

"Pedro." He muttered something in Spanish and went to head after Pedro. But Jax stopped him.

"Look if Pedro is the pipe line to Lobo. Then lets feed him something useful. Our guns we'll tell him were moving them out of Cali tomorrow. That were storing them here tonight." He turned to face Luis. "Then you and your guys take them down."

"Our solider says there's about 25 Lobos local. I only have these 4 men with me I'm gonna need support." Bobby blew out a breath and shook his head.

"We're not exactly an infantry unit bro." Luis just looked at Jax as he placed his phone to his ear.

"Oh you will be because make no mistake gentlemen. We're at war."


	20. Chapter 20

Everything Changes

Chapter Twenty

Unfortunately Liam woke just as Nicole pulled into the driveway of Gemma and Clay's house. And his temper hadn't eased. He started screaming at her again. And when he saw Chibs' bike pull up behind them he lost it and grabbed her bag and stormed towards the house. Nicole watched him pull out the keys from her bag and let himself in. Closing her eyes she let out a deep breath and finally opened her door to follow him inside.

The kitchen and living space were both empty and Nicole figured he'd headed to her room. She started to make her way there when Chibs called her back.

"Yeh gonna be a'right lass?"

"I'll call you if I need you." Chibs nodded and she continued the short journey to her room.

Leaning against the door frame she watched as Liam rushed around the room gathering up their belongings.

"Liam.." He didn't acknowledge her so she tried again. "Liam..."

"What?"

"Are you okay?" He stopped what he was doing and turned to face her. The look in his eyes was a look that she had never seen before.

"What do you think. I've just been shot and then that guy.." She saw and heard his disgust when he mentioned Happy. "He hit me Nic..."

"I know." She moved into the room. "Will you let Chibs look at your arm..."She noticed the swelling on his cheek. "And your face." By the huff that came from him she gathered that he wasn't going to let that happen. "Okay, can I look at it?"

"I should be going to a Hospital Nicole."

"That can't happen."

"This is fucked up."

"I know. Now will you let me look at you." Finally he nodded.

Nicole cleaned up his cut. It turned out the bullet hadn't penetrated him instead it had just grazed him which made it easier for her to patch up. The cut beneath his eye wasn't bad either but she patched that up to just to be on the safe side. They never spoke once as she patched him up and Nicole wondered what was going to go happen once she was done. He had been packing up their belongings once again so Nicole knew that he wanted out of here and she couldn't blame him, it was hard to understand this life and not everyone was cut out for it. She always had doubts about Liam, but today's events had proved that he was not cut out for it.

"All done." Nicole started packing away the first aid kit and disposing of the items she had used in her bin.

"Good. Now get ready were leaving." And there it was, she knew this was coming.

"Liam."

"Now Nicole." She moved closer to him.

"Liam. I'm not going."

"I've packed everything. Our flight is in two hours." He picked up the bags, and moved for the door. "We need to leave now."

"Liam I'm not going with you."

"I've made arrangements to have the car picked up from the airport so we haven't got to worry about that." Nicole ran her fingers through her hair. He wasn't listening to anything she had to say.

"Liam listen to me. I'm not going with you. I'm staying here." This time he stopped and turned to look at her. His head shaking.

"No." Nicole pulled the engagement ring off her finger and held it out to him. "No...no...NO..." He didn't reach for the ring instead he reached for her wrist and pulled her closer to him. "No..your not doing this to me. I love you..."

"Liam please..."

"Please what...your leaving me...leaving me for what this life. I got shot today and I couldn't even go to the fucking hospital you...my future wife had patch me up...It's fucked up...and what you just want me to stand here and accept it when you tell me your leaving me for this..." She accepted that he was upset but that didn't mean she was going to just stand there and let him insult her family. Before she could defend them though he continued his rant. His grip tightening with each new word he spoke. "For him...this is about him isn't it...you did fuck him last night didn't you?...DIDN'T YOU..."

"No..." Nicole tried to keep calm, he was angry enough for the both of them and if she started biting back who knew where it would lead, because she had never seen him like this.

"Liar...He's scum...nothing but a pathetic criminal...all of them are..."

"Don't say that, you don't know them." Again her voice was calm.

"I know them al'right...their animals all of them ae. He will never treat you like I do. I love you I can provide for you...He's just using you for sex...No I'm not allowing this.." Liam started pulling her towards the door but Nicole started fighting back.

"No...Liam...Stop..."

"I'm not leaving you with these criminals. We're leaving..." He started to pull her harder and for the first time Nicole was worried about what he would do. She was scared and only saw one way out.

"CHIBS..."

* * *

"Aye, I'll take er den Meet ya at da warehouse..." Chibs had been talking to Jax who had been filling him in on what had happened at the warehouse with the Lobo and what the plan was. While he was on the phone he could hear raised voices coming from down the hall and he'd be lying if he said he wasn't a little bit concerned but he had to hear what Jax had to say. But then he heard Nicole calling his name and he couldn't ignore it any longer. "Gotta go brutha..." Chibs hung up the phone and rushed down the hall to where the should of his name was being called.

When he entered the room he looked straight at Nicole and could see the sheer panic on her face. His eyes then moved downwards and he noticed that Liam had hold of her.

He reached for Liam, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and pinned him against the wall with one hand while his other grabbed the wrist of the hand that was holding Nicole gripping him like a vice making him let go of her.

"Your a whore...I sho_..." _Chibs peeled Liam off the wall he had him pinned against before he could finish his sentence and dragged him down the hallway all the way to the front door where he literally threw him out. Nicole watched the whole thing from behind Chibs.

"Yeh, betta fuckin' leave. Don't wanna see ya face round ere again." Chibs walked back down the hall to her bedroom and picked up the black leather holdall leaving hers on the floor. When he got back to the door he threw the bag at him, hitting Liam directly in the stomach.

"I gave you everything..." Liam yelled, but stopped when Chibs pulled his gun on him. Chibs looked down at Nicole and saw the engagement ring clasped between he fingers. Without saying a word he plucked it from between her fingers. He half expected her to protest but she didn't so he threw the ring to the ground it front of Liam.

"Now fuck off." Chibs voice was unfaltering and Liam knew as well as Nicole did that he would not hesitate in pulling the trigger.

"Fine. You can have her." Nicole watched him pick up his bag and her ring before he scrambled into the car. She walked back into the house but Chibs stayed back to make sure he left.

When he came back inside he found her sitting at the kitchen table, her head buried in her hands. He ran a hand over his own face and took a seat next to her. Liam's words still hanging in the air. He hadn't heard it all but if it made her react like this then the words he had spat must have been harsh. Nicole wasn't one who was easily offended.

"Yeh okay love?" Nicole finally looked up at him. She wasn't sobbing but there were tears falling down her face and Chibs couldn't help but feel bad for the girl.

"I don't want to talk about it. Not now." Chibs nodded. There was no point pushing her. Plus he had other things he had to. And one of them was taking Nicole to meet Gemma and Tig at the fund-raiser. Clay was going to be there as well apparently Jax said it would be a good idea to have Samcro placed somewhere else while the war Luis had told them they were involved in whether they liked it or not took place. Chibs had to agree that it was a good idea, but watching Nicole retreat back to her room he didn't think it was going to be that easy to get her to go anywhere. He looked at the clock on the wall he had a couple of hours, maybe by that time her mood would be better. Chibs scoffed he knew that wasn't going to be true.

* * *

"Chibs is going take Nic to meet Gemma, then he'll come meet us here." Jax said to Opie. Everyone else had cleared out, the shit wasn't kicking off till dusk so they had some time to get themselves ready.

"I'm gonna head up to Mary's see the kids."

"That's good man. Where's Piney?"

"At the tequila retreat."

"I'll take a ride out there check on him."

"A'ppreciate it brother."

"I'm sorry man. I never thought this deal would lead to this shit."

"I know." Opie helped Jax to his feet from the bench he was sitting on. They shared a brief hug before heading to their bikes. "Chibs say how Nic was. Heard Hap knocked her boy clean out. Bet she was pissed."

"Yeah you could say that but the guy was freaking out it had to be done." Opie nodded. "Chibs didn't say much."

"How was she after what went down yesterday?"

"How do ya think? Koz said she drowned herself in booze."

"You think Clay pulled her in because of the shit Darby said?"

"Maybe."

"You told her bout that shit?" Jax shook his head. Telling her was something that had been playing on his mind alot lately but he found himself putting it off because he didn't want to have that conversation with her because he was afraid that she would tell him it was all true.

"She doesn't need to hear that shit. I should have dealt with that asshole a long time ago."

"You thinking of taking care of it now?" Jax shrugged. He wanted to, he wanted nothing more than to put a bullet in Darby's head but the club had enough shit going on right now and Jax didn't think adding murder to that shit list was a good idea.

"If he's tries anything I will. I'll pull that trigger bro." Opie couldn't agree more.

"I'll have your back man."

"Thanks." Growing tired of the current conversation as he was finding it hard to keep his anger in check Jax changed the subject. "How's Lyla?"

"Gone to visit her sister. Taken Piper with her. She's still pissed but she did take my call the last night. Lasted bout two seconds but it's a start right."

"That what you want?"

"I don't know man, I mean she great with the kids, and the sex is great..." His comment made Jax laugh.

"Not sure why if the sex is that good but I'm sensing a but here..." Opie was quiet for a second.

"She's not Donna." Jax placed his hand on Opie's shoulder.

"No she isn't. And no one else will be either. Donna...Donna was Donna one of a kind. Lyla may not be her but you can't make your decision about your marriage to her based on a ghost Ope."

"Yeah." Jax hit his hand against his shoulder.

"Right now come on before this gets to gay."

* * *

Jax pulled up outside Piney's cabin. The Old man walking out to meet him, shot gun in hand. "You on task or is this a social call?" He asked from the top of the steps.

"I'm just checking in."

"I'm fine."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Look I know you and Clay have been going at it over this Cartel thing."

"You don't know anything." Piney retreated back into his cabin, Jax following closely behind him. His eyes rolling. Jax knew how this was going to go.

"Okay your pissed I get that. I'm just trying to tell you my side."

"Do you even have a side anymore?" Jax dropped his head this was heading exactly where Jax thought it would and he really didn't want to go there. "I gave up on this club for 10 years but then you started coming up. You reminded me so much of John..."

"Don't...don't talk to me about JT. He bailed on his family his club. You trying to tell me you didn't know about Maureen Ashby, Trinity?"

"Maureen was just a distraction, but when your brother took a turn for the worse he was here."

"Damage already done."

"We all do damage son. Character is built on how you fix it."

"Well he didn't fix much."

"Because he didn't have a chance. You do."

"I'm trying to do what's right, I'm trying to what's right for me, my family." Jax was shouting now at this point.

"And dealing with the Cartel is way to do that." Jax ran his hand over his beard. "You know this is a bad idea. Look what happened yesterday. What if Juice hadn't seen Miles with the drugs. What would Clay have done. You and I both know that Gallindo wanted blood they wouldn't have left without a body."

"Clay wouldn't have handed her over." Jax was shouting again.

"You sure bout that? She's your family to Jax." Jax started backing away but stopped when Piney moved towards him. "You need to think about which father figure your looking up to. John he..he was the best man I ever knew. Before you let him die you should find him, and know that for yourself."

Neither of them uttered another word before Jax left.

* * *

Chibs had given her enough time. Stubbing out his cigarette in the now overflowing ash tray Chibs covered the short distance that lay between him and Nicole's door, which he noticed was closed.

His first knock got no answer, neither did the second one.

"Nicole luv.." He pressed his ear against the door. He could hear movement but still she never answered him. She left him no choice. Turning the door handle he was glad when it turned with ease. "Ya decent lass, I'm comin in." Again no answer so he continued into her bedroom.

He found Nicole leaning out of her bedroom window. He gathered that she was smoking judging by the stream of smoke pooling around her. She never attempted to move even though he knew that she knew he was there.

"Jax has bin on da fone. I need ta take ya ta meet Gemma."

"I'm not going anywhere."

"Ain't got no choice luv. Ya can't stay ere."

"I'll be fine." She snapped. Her anger clear as day.

"Ya can't stay ere..."

"Tough. I just want o be alone." Chibs ran his fingers through his hair. He knew she couldn't stay here but apart from tying her up and kidnapping her on his bike he wasn't sure what to do, apart from call Jax. He seemed to be the only who could handle her when she was being this stubborn. She could be worse than the Queen herself sometimes and this was defiantly one of those times.

* * *

Jax had only just arrived back at the Warehouse when his phone started ringing. Checking the ID he saw Chibs' number flash across the screen. _What now?_ Was all he could think. After the argument he had just had with Piney he really didn't need anymore shit but he had a horrible feeling that this was exactly what this call was, trouble.

"Yeah"

"_She won't leave."_

"What?"

_"Said she wants ta be alone."_

"Why?"

_"Da lad and her got into it had ta kick im out." _Yeah this was trouble. He ran his hand over his face._  
_  
"She a'right?" It was a stupid question of course she wasn't alright if she didn't want to leave the house.

"_Nah, da lil shite lost it wit her."_

"Fuck. Look stay with her for abit. I'll call you back when I figure this out, okay." Jax pocketed his cell back into his cut and entered the warehouse which was full with Sons and Mayans already.

Jax knew they couldn't spare anyone they needed all the man power they could get. Tig and Clay were already out and they couldn't lose any more. But on the other hand he didn't like the thought of Nicole being left alone. After the bag of heads that was dropped on Samcros doorstep this morning it was clear that the Lobos didn't mess around, meaning they probably wouldn't even bat an eye lid at killing Nicole just because they could and because they knew it would upset their enemies new business associates. Jax was not going to risk that happening. He had made sure Tara and his boys were safe he wasn't going to forget about Nicole. Like Piney had said she was family.

"You okay man?" Opie could see that something was clearly bothering his best friend. His comment made the others turn to face Jax.

"Just spoken to Chibs. Nic's refusing to go."

"Why?" Opie knew Nicole could be difficult when she wanted to be but this was about the club and she normally did as she was told knowing that it was for best.

"According to Chibs her and Liam got into it."

"Bad?" Bobby asked and Jax could see the concern in the older man's face. Jax knew he looked at Nicole as one of his own his recent stand against Clay proved that.

"Yeah. Got rough by the sounds of it. Point is she just wants to be alone but I can't have her there alone and we can't spare anyone."

"How bout taking her to pop's." Jax shook his head. Considering their recent argument he didn't think that was a good idea. But he didn't want to go into that with everyone.

"He was already passed out when I got there." He knew they wouldn't question that, it was all Piney seemed to be doing lately.

"I got a place." Everyone turned to look at Happy.

"Yeah?"

"Brought it when I patched into Samcro. It's off the track. Hidden. Secure." If Happy said it was hidden and secure Jax knew it was. Happy didn't take security lightly. But then again after killing as many people as he had and being an enforcer for one of the biggest MC's it meant that he walked around with a target constantly on his back, so security was top priority. This sounded like a good option. She would still be safe and she could still have the alone time she obviously wanted.

"Sounds good bro." Happy nodded and pulled out his keys. He started removing the keys to his place when Jax stopped him. "No man. You should go. You know where you're heading it will be quicker."

* * *

Chibs had to admit he was intrigued as to how this was going to work. Jax had called him and told him that Happy was apparently coming to collect Nicole.

He had to laugh to himself this was defiantly going to be interesting. One stubborn bitch versus one very impatient bastard. Yes interesting was defiantly the word.

* * *

Nicole stared at herself in the mirror. She looked like shit. This was another reason she didn't want to go anywhere. All she wanted to do was to crawl into her bed and not move until morning or maybe afternoon she hadn't decided yet. It wasn't the fact that her and Liam had split up, she was planning on doing that anyway. She had made her decision and Liam wasn't it. It was the words he had spoken to her, the names he had called her. She knew he would be upset but she never expected that reaction, but then again she never anticipated him getting shot or Happy punching him in the face. He was hurting, upset she understood that but it didn't mean that the way it had all gone down hadn't hurt.

She had never seen him like that before. He had never raised his voice at her and he had defiantly never grabbed her like that. But she knew she had no one to blame but herself for that. She had driven him to that.

"Fuck sake Teller..." She chastised herself. She had made the nicest man she knew turn into an asshole.

"You done?" Nicole jumped at the sound of his voice. Happy was standing in the doorway leaning against the frame staring at her. She hadn't even heard him. But then again it was part of his job to sneak up on people.

"How..I..how long have you been there?"

"Long enough. Now get your shit together we're leaving."

"No." She shook her head for emphasis. "I'm not going to meet Gemma."

"I know. Now get your shit. We don't have long."

"What do you mean you know?"

"I ain't taking ya to meet Gemma."

"Where are we going?"

"Somewhere where you will be safe..." Happy could see her mouth open and she was about to object but he didn't give her a chance. "And alone. Now get your shit together I ain't asking again."

Chibs was in utter shock. In less than 5 minutes and without any screaming Happy was striding out the door, Nicole in tow. He had to laugh to himself, it seemed that Jax wasn't the only one who could handle her.

* * *

Nicole had no idea where Happy was taking her, but then again she didn't really care because he said she was going to be safe and alone. Plus she had to admit she kind of trusted him. Even if he did seem to be doubling back on himself every now and then.

40 minutes later they pulled up outside an old logged cabin. It reminded her a little bit of Piney's but it seemed nicer, newer. Happy cut the engine and let her off the bike. She noticed that he did a quick check of the surrounding area before dismounting his bike and leading her up the steps to the front door.

5 locks all different but all had to be unlocked before they could step inside. She finally knew where she was or at least who's cabin they were at. This cabin was Happy's.

She followed him inside and down the hall to what looked like the living room. She was so busy looking around trying to take it all in she didn't even notice that Happy had stopped in front of her, at least not until she continued walking and hit his solid body. Her eyes went straight to his.

"So this is your place?" He gave her one of his famous nods. "I didn't know you had it."

"That's the point." This time she nodded. She watched him pull a key off his key chain. "This is the key to the gun cabinets. There's one in the bedroom." Nicole rolled her eyes of course Happy would have a gun cabinet in his room. "And there's one over there." He pointed to the cabinet in the corner of the room. "Bedroom is through there bathroom is attached." He pointed to her right before pointing behind her. "Kitchen." Nicole looked over her shoulder for a second be she returned her eyes to his. "There's an alarm that runs through the whole house and outside, I'll set it when I leave. I have the only set of keys so I'm locking your ass in here when I leave. Got it?"

"Yeap." He handed the key for the gun cabinets.

"There's a 9 mill in the bedroom cabinet. Take it your not packing anymore?" She shook her head a little embarrassed. "Still remember how to shoot."

"It's like riding a bike."

"Good. Keep it with you at all times. I mean it. All the fucking time Nic till I'm back."

"Okay." He nodded and moved around her heading for the door. He only made it halfway before she called out his name.

"Hap..." She crossed her arms over her chest as she walked down the hall towards him. "I don't know what's going on here but I guess it's nothing good." She was almost in front of him. "I just want to say..."

"I know keep an eye on your boys." Happy knew that's what she was going to say she always asked him that before something like this went down.

"Well yeah but that wasn't what I was going to say." She edged a little closer to him. "I was going to say make sure that you look after yourself." She watched one of his eyebrow raise, the corner of his mouth itching to crack a smile. She playfully hit his arm "Get over yourself Hap, I just need you to come back here in one piece. Your the only one with a set of keys remember I don't want to die out here in your house in the middle of nowhere." He was smiling now.

"A'right." With those last words Happy left and Nicole stood silently listening to him lock her inside. For the first time that day she felt okay, she felt safe.


	21. Chapter 21

Everything Changes

Chapter Twenty One

"I thought Nicole was supposed to meeting us here?" Tara overheard Gemma ask Clay as she snuggled up to her husband as they listened to the band on the stage.

"Jax was pretty vague but he made other plans for her. She's safe."

Tara was now officially worried. Jax had made sure she joined Gemma at the fund-raiser. At first she had just thought he was trying to encourage her and his mother to bond, which was never going to happen not now anyway. Not after what she had read. But of course Tara couldn't say that, so she went along with her Old Mans orders and joined Gemma. But hearing that he Jax had gone out of his way to make sure that Nicole was safe this was obviously more serious than she had originally thought. Tara just wished that Jax had made other arrangements for her as well because the last place Tara wanted to be was stuck with Gemma and more importantly Clay.

Gemma knew about the letters or at least had suspicions about them and what was written in them, Tara could kind of handle the Queen, but the King she wasn't so sure.

Gemma and Clay were close, and from what she had read in those god damn letters they were close enough to plot Gemma's first husbands demise. So it didn't take a genius to figure out that Gemma would have told Clay about them. And that scared her, he scared her.

Even when she had first started dating Jax when they were in high school Clay made her nervous, and at that stage she had only met him briefly, and then when he became a more permanent fixture in the Teller family Tara always tried to keep her distance from him. Jax had always told her that she was being stupid and that Clay would never hurt her.

She didn't think that statement was true anymore. Especially if he knew.

She needed now more than ever to get out of Charming. She didn't feel safe anymore and considering that Jax was constantly making sure she was protected- Rat had become a regular at their house- she didn't want it any more and she didn't know how much longer she could wait for Jax to come through. She loved him and would always be there for him but she had to think about her two sons. Their safety was her number one priority.

* * *

Happy let himself into the cabin. The night had been a complete waste of time. The only thing they had achieved was recovering the bodies to the heads that had been dropped on their doorsteps that morning. Everyone was pissed but Jax was livid and he was on the phone straight away to Clay.

Happy could tell that Jax was starting to re-think this whole deal especially now he could see where it was leading the club. This was why he voted no to this Cartel deal. He knew it would never end well, drugs always ended up dirty he seen it in the neighborhood he grew up it. But he couldn't think like that, the vote had passed and they were in this together as a club whether he like it or not. He would never turn his back on the club.

As he walked inside he was encased in darkness, apart from the small amount of light coming from the TV.

Resetting the alarm. He toed of his boots and made his way towards the light. He saw Nicole curled up on the crappy sofa he had fast asleep-he made a mental to move her later- walking back on himself he headed to the kitchen and grabbed himself a beer from the fridge before returning to living room where she lay.

He took a seat on the arm chair next to the couch. His eyes briefly flicked to the TV where the credits of whatever film she had chosen- well if she had made that far- rolled up the screen. He took a swig of his beer as his eyes raked over her. She looked like she had been crying again and that pissed him off. Chibs had filled them in on what happened and it took all of his willpower to keep his feet planted to the ground because as soon as he heard that that prick had touched her he wanted to kill him. Leaning forward and if he squinted he could just make out the red finger marks on her wrist. He winced at the memory of how he had left his own finger marks on her. He promised himself that day that it wouldn't happen again, he wouldn't lay hands on her and he wouldn't allow any other fucker to either, she'd already suffered enough of that shit. But he couldn't just up and leave Charming on a 6 hour ride to LA, so the prick would have to wait.

Draining what was left of his beer he placed the empty on the coffee table and picked up the control shutting off the TV before standing to his feet.

He was tired and knew that after tonight tomorrow was going to be an even busier day than they had first thought. Shrugging off his cut he draped it over the back of the couch followed by the bullet proof vest he was wearing.

He easily picked her up from the couch. First time he saw her he knew she had lost weight so he wasn't surprised by how light she felt, but he was surprised when she curled up against him, her arms wrapping around his neck. He froze for a second afraid that she would wake but she didn't.

He used his foot to kick back the covers before placing her down gently. He carefully unbuttoned her jeans and started to remove them, when he realised that they were the thing he hated the most, skinny jeans. Sure they made her ass and legs look great but they were a mother fucker to get off and that when the girl you were stripping them from was awake it got a hell of a lot more difficult when she was asleep and you were desperately trying not to wake her. But Hap did like to think of himself as some what of an expert when came to undressing her, this wasn't the first time she worn them and if to prove himself right he removed them without her even stirring.

Folding the jeans up and placing them on the his dresser he made his way back to her and grabbed the covers pulling them over her, happy that she was settled he went to head to the kitchen for another beer when he felt her catch his wrist between her petite fingers.

When he looked at her, her eyes were still shut which he found amusing.

"Jay?" He knew it was a question.

"He's whole." She smiled sleepily and dropped her hold on his hand as she curled back into herself, falling straight back asleep.

Happy hoped that she was going to be okay. It had been a rough couple of days for her. First Clay and then the Prick and Happy knew how she dealt with things like this and normally it wasn't very well. She could be tough as nails one minute then a wreck the next. Happy wasn't go to let her go there though.

The club was becoming more fucked up by the day. Piney was butting heads with Clay, Bobby had called a vote for change of leadership after he had heard about what had happened with Nicole at the warehouse, Juice was freaking out, Tara had been attacked and to top it all off they were now in the middle of a war between two Cartels. No one could handle if Nicole went on one her downward spirals, Jax had his hands full as it was already. Happy knew he would have to keep a close eye on her.

* * *

Juice knelt beside the unmarked grave where Miles lay. He hadn't been able to sleep since he had killed him. Everything was wrong, everything he was doing was wrong even though this had all started because he tried to do the right thing.

_What an idiot? _

After handing over the sample of blow to Roosevelt he arrested him. But that wasn't the worst of it.

He thought getting the sample was it, a one off thing. But it wasn't. Juice was locked in now and according to Roosevelt if he didn't continue to help the law by giving them dirt on Samcro word would be leaked to the underground that he was working with the feds. Which meant he might as well have confessed to taking the blow, because either way he was going to be killed but at least Miles wouldn't have had to suffer and Nicole would never have been dragged into this whole mess.

And then there was Nicole.

She was onto something. She was starting to put the pieces together and when she did, when she realised that he was putting her family lives on the line to save himself she would tell them.

No, there was only one way out of this mess. One way that put an end to all this and put a stop to any more innocent people getting hurt.

He wrapped the chain link around his neck, took a deep breath said a prayer and jumped off the branch of the tree he was perched on.

Yes this would all be over, no one else would get hurt because him.

* * *

Jax walked into his house. His eyes found Tara almost immediately where she sat at the kitchen table. She looked tired, stressed and the way she was looking at him Jax dreaded what was about to happen. Nodding knowingly at her he ran a hand over his beard turning his attention to Rat, the prospect who had now stood from his seat on the couch upon Jax's entrance.

"Go." Jax ordered coolly. Sensing the tension that had manifested in the seconds that Jax had entered the house Rat never answered instead deciding it was best just to leave as quickly as possible.

Watching the front door close behind him Jax took a settling breath and carefully walked into the kitchen sliding into the chair sat opposite her.

That sat in silence for god knows how long, both just looking at one another neither one of them wanting to start this inevitable conversation that had been hanging over them for days now.

"I need to know everything Jax." Tara finally spoke. Her voice was strained. She was smart always had been, it was a trait Jax had always loved and admired in her. She was everything he wasn't. She was a good person.

He remembered what a lucky bastard he felt when he first got together with her. She was a straight A student and a teachers pet, she was going places and it always baffled him as to why she even gave him a second look but she did and he wasn't going to try and second guess that because she was something special.

They lasted 3 years way longer than anyone, including himself had ever predicted. Jax had always felt love from his family and brothers and had always returned it but it wasn't until 9 months into his relationship with Tara that he really felt what it was to truly love someone, it was overwhelming at first in fact it scared the shit out him and almost had him running from her but when he realised that she loved him back that fear disappeared. On her 18th birthday he marked her with his crow something she willingly accepted.

Again against all the doubts Tara had kept up her school work and passed High-school with straight A's and as Valedictorian. Jax remembered how proud he was of his girl.

But after one of the best summers of his life everything changed. And he was faced with one of the most difficult decisions of his life. Tara or the Club.

He knew that if he tried, really tired he could have made her stay but what kind of a man would that make him. Making his girl give up on her dreams, give up on everything she had worked so hard for. She wanted to become a doctor, to save lives and he didn't want to take that from her even though the thought of losing her was tearing his heart into pieces.

But he'd be lying if he said that the club wasn't a factor. He loved the club, his brothers and his place within it. After his fathers death he had clung to the club, in a strange way, it was like being part of the club was keeping his dad alive and he wasn't ready to give up on that yet, he wasn't ready to step away from that.

But that was 12 years ago.

They had found their way back to one another 10 years after Tara had left Charming. And as soon as they had laid eyes on one another he knew that nothing had changed, he still loved her and she him. It had taken just weeks of them being back within the same town for them to re-connect and they hadn't looked back.

Sure it hadn't been easy there had been some major fucking bumps in the road but they had survived, and they had become a proper family like he had always imagined even at the young age of 18.

And after his recent stint in Stockton he came out with a new out look on life. Being inside away from his family he realised that he didn't want that anymore. He didn't like the fact that he was missing so much especially as he could easily find himself in this situation again because of his association with Samcro.

12 years ago he had chosen the club but as soon as he had stepped out of Stockton prison he had chosen Tara.

Tara and his boys were his life now. He didn't need the club like he had when he was 19 he needed Tara, his kids. He promised her that he was getting out and they could finally have a life together away from the club.

And although he hadn't changed his mind it was proving to be a lot harder to get out than he had originally thought. And looking at the love of his life sitting opposite him she to was feeling the strain.

He didn't want to tell her about the Cartel, he knew she wouldn't understand it, would think that it was to dangerous and after everything that had gone down today he would have to agree with her. But this was their way out and she needed to understand that so he would answer her question.

"That deal I told you about when I first got out the deal that was set to make us a lot of money." A slight movement of her head told him that she remembered so he continued. "It's with the Gallindo Cartel." He watched her eyes shoot to meet his. He gathered she knew what a cartel was. "We're muling their coke..."

"Jesus Christ..." She blew out a breath as she looked away from him.

"I din't know that the drugs were part of the deal, I thought it was just guns."

"Was that Clay?" Jax nodded. "He can't be trusted Jax." She was looking at him again. Hate clear in her eyes. It unsettled him for a moment, was the hate for him, Clay or the situation. He didn't know but he didn't like her looking at him like that.

"Look I know its a shitty deal but we need this babe. This deal is our out."

"And how long do you think we can survive this. I'm not stupid..."

"I know."

"The shooting today, what if the boys..." She trailed off at the thought. Jax shook his head.

"I'd never let that happen." And Jax meant it. He would throw his own life on the line before he let anyone hurt his family.

"You can't say that Jax..." Her voice was quiet and he could hear it falter. He knew what was coming because he had heard that voice once before. "I'm sorry...I have to go. I have to get them out of here." And just like last time he knew he couldn't stop her. So he nodded as he was unable to speak for the lump rising in his throat. And it was his silence that told Tara that she was doing the right thing.

She could see it written all over his face. Regret and failure. Wiping her tears she found the courage to continue.

"There's a conference up at Providence Hospital in Oregon, the day after tomorrow...There interested in me." More tears fell as she watched a proud smile spread onto Jax's face. She was telling him she was taking his children and leaving and he was he proud of her. This is why she loved him with her whole heart and why this was just a temporary solution she would never leave him again.

Reaching across the table Jax took her hand that she was using to wipe away her fallen tears, and brought it up to his lips, kissing her hand lightly before taking it in his other hand.

"Take Neeta with you. Stay there till things calm down here." Tara wrapped her hand over the top of his hands that were clutching hers. More tears falling.

"I love you so much..." She confessed with a shuddered breath. He brought both her hands to his lips again.

"I love you to." Jax got to his feet and pulled Tara from her chair, his arms encircling her as she willingly went to him burying her head in his cut. "I promise you, I'll get us out of this."

* * *

The next morning Nicole stirred feeling surprisingly rested and content. She knew any other normal person would be heartbroken by the fact that their engagement had crumbled, and even though she had shed a few tears last night, this morning she was actually feeling okay.

Although it hadn't gone like she had wanted it to, the facts hadn't changed. She was going to end things with Liam because she finally saw what probably everyone else had from the start, they weren't right for one another, they didn't fit. Liam had always been a means to an end. Of course she loved him he was a great guy, kind, giving, loving but there was a massive difference between loving someone and being in love with someone. And Nicole had never been in love with him.

She was fine with going along with everything, planing a wedding with him but that was before. Before she came back home and before she realised that her life was and always had been in Charming. That feeling was proven by how good she felt settled comfortably in the tattooed arm that was currently wrapped underneath her.

Shifting her body, she turned so that she was facing him. He was flat on his back lying above the sheets. He was shirtless and sockless but his jeans were still on. _Shame._ She thought to herself with a small smile on her lips.

She was under no illusion that the man across from her would never take an Old Lady and she didn't want to be one. Being a Niece, Cousin and surrogate daughter to most of the Sons was more than enough pressure she didn't think she could handle the Old Lady title as well. In saying that though she couldn't stop admiring the man beside her. She remembered exactly how his hands felt on her skin. The mere thought of it made her stomach flip. But then came the guilt. It hadn't even been 12 hours since her engagement to Liam ended and here she was wanting another man to touch her. _I'm a horrible fucked up person. _Nicole mused.

Flipping back the sheets she swung her legs over the edge of the bed. She was a little surprised to find herself missing her jeans, she looked over her shoulder at Happy, he must have taken them off because she couldn't remember doing it. Ignoring the thought of Happy undressing her Nicole made her way over to the adjoining bathroom.

As she sat on the toilet her eyes did a little scope of the room it was exactly like every other guys bathroom messy. She shook her head as she flushed the toilet. After washing her hands and giving herself the once over in the mirror-where she realised she looked like crap and no matter how much she pinched her cheeks she was still going to look like shit-she started searching for a towel to dry her hands not surprised when she found it on the floor. Bending down she picked it up but as she dried her hands something fell from the towel. Discarding the towel on the edge of the bath Nicole grabbed the shirt that had fallen. Holding the garment in front of her she took an intake of breath by what she saw.

The once white wife beater was now covered in blood, so much it was sickening. But it wasn't the blood that was bothering-living with Jax and Clay, Ryan even had gotten her used to seeing and cleaning blood stained clothes- what was bothering her was who the blood belonged to because from the view she had this morning Happy was injury free, _thank god. _

Opening the door shirt still in hand she prepared herself to wake him, but she was surprised to find him wide awake propped against the headboard staring at her. His eyes never left hers and Nicole held his stare before letting her eyes fall to the shirt in her hand, Happy's eyes following hers.

"It's not mine." He spoke his voice even more gravelly than normal.

"I gathered." Her eyes went to his perfect unharmed stomach. "Is it a Sons?" Happy shook his head.

Nicole actually felt herself relax as she released the breath she had been holding since picking up the shirt. No one was hurt, well none of her family anyway, she couldn't be sure about the other guy who's blood was currently smeared all over the shirt she was holding. She should have questions, and she did but she was just happy in the knowledge that the blood didn't belong to anyone she loved. Plus it was to early for all this shit.

"Okay." Nicole turned back on herself and dumped the shirt in the laundry basket. When she came out she headed for the dresser where she had spotted her jeans. As she pulled them on she could feel Happy looking at her and she tried to ignore it but was finding it very difficult.

* * *

Happy watched her getting dressed, trying to figure her out. Last night he had been worried that she wasn't handling shit but as he looked at her now she seemed okay, even after having found his bloody shirt she seemed fine. Sometimes he just didn't get her. Like he expected her to have more questions about the blood on his shirt. But nothing.

"You want some coffee?"

"Yeah." Nicole nodded and disappeared out of his room. He tilted his head slightly so he could watch her ass disappear down the hall. He knew it was probably a little too soon but he wondered if she would be up for reinstating their little arrangement, because he was dying to feel her again.

Grabbing a clean t-shirt from the dresser Happy made his way to the kitchen where he could hear her pottering around, obviously trying to find the things she needed. When he reached the kitchen he saw he leaning on her tiptoes as she tried to grab the mugs from the top shelf. She was such a short ass. Smirking he stepped up behind her and easily grabbed the two mugs she had be trying so hard to get to.

Nicole felt him before she saw his arm reach pass her and grab two mugs. She took a deep breath as he pressed himself against her. Nicole couldn't take much more so she turned her body around hoping that when she faced him he would put a little distance between them but she was wrong and facing him didn't help as she came face to face with his bare chest.

"Thanks." Nicole managed to utter as she tried hard to keep herself composed but the way Happy just smirked at her Nicole almost lost it then and there and jumped him, but then he backed away and pulled on his shirt. She was slightly relieved and slightly disappointed. Nicole shook that from her head and continued her task of making the coffee.

Happy found himself looking at her again. But this time he was looking at her differently. He found himself thinking about her and the prick. As long as he had known her she had always gone for guys the was somehow club related or knew of the life because Nicole whether she liked it or not was was SOA born and bread, even when she tried to distance herself from Samcro with her first boyfriend Micheal she didn't get very far. His dad was King of the Nords so he knew the outlaw kind of life. But this prick was different. He was clean cut and Happy was pretty sure the guy had never even seen the inside of a prison cell in his life or broken any kind of law. He looked like he wasn't short of a few bucks if the posh clothes she'd been wearing and all that designer crap was anything to go by. Was that why she was him, his money keeping her in the good life? Then he found himself wondering if he had even managed to fuck her properly. He doubted it if the way she had just been blushing was anything to go by. At that thought she turned to face him offering him a cup.

"Thanks." He mumbled before taking a sip of the coffee made exactly how he liked it.

"So how's Juice doing?" Happy stopped drinking his coffee and stared at her. Nicole knew asking Happy about Juice was probably not the best idea but she still couldn't get that shit out of her head. He was up to something and she was dying to get answers where ever she could.

Happy didn't like that Nicole was asking about Juice. She was a smart girl meaning that she was probably putting shit together, like he had. None of his other brothers seemed to be voicing their suspicions or even showing any signs that they were having any about Juice but Happy was. Ever since that day at the warehouse where Miles had been revealed as the person who had stolen the blow and Juice had shot him Happy had reservations. Something to him just didn't add up. He wouldn't say anything yet not until he was sure but if Juice was doing what he thought he was the last thing Happy wanted was Nicole to place herself in the middle of that shit. Juice may have already put her ass on the line once and that didn't sit well with him.

"Why you askin'?" Happy asked after taking a sip of his coffee. It annoyed the hell out of him when she shrugged at him. "Well.."

"Just with the shooting an all he hasn't killed like that before..." Nicole knew she was clutching at straws and she knew by the way he was looking at her that he didn't want to be having this conversation. This was a bad idea. She turned her head away from him as she placed her coffee on the side but was shocked when she felt him in front of her again. She really did hate it when he did that. With no other choice Nicole trained her eyes back to his. She couldn't make out the look that was in his eyes, but she swore he looked mad.

"That's club shit. I want you to stay away from Juice, he ain't your problem." Happy lent in closer so that their bodies were practically touching again. He could see that he was making her nervous and maybe he was coming on a little strong but he was doing it for her own good. "You getting me Nic?" Nicole nodded her head.

_Happy knew. _She wasn't sure what that meant giving that she didn't know what Juice was up to, but either Happy did or he was suspicious just like she was and all this, the unfaltering look in his eyes as he stared at her, the urgency in his tone. He was trying to protect to her, he was always trying to protect her.

"Okay." Before she could think about what she was doing she was pressing her lips against the corner of his mouth. "Okay." She said as she pulled back.

Happy fucking felt hard and it was taking all of his will power not to press her up against the counter and fuck her especially when he caught a whiff of that damn perfume of hers.

"Will you drop me off at Piney's cabin?" Her random and sudden question brought him from his dirty thoughts.

"Yeah."

"Thanks." She smiled and Happy watched as she grabbed her cup and tried to move pass him. He thought about blocking her path but again reminded himself that this was to soon for her. Although he wasn't sure how much longer he would last especially if she pulled a stunt like that again. Again he turned to watch her walk away from him as this time she disappeared back into his bedroom. Happy decided to stay put following her into a room where there was a perfectly good bed probably wasn't the best idea.

* * *

After getting herself ready-the best she could considering she didn't really have anything to help her- she found Happy still standing in the kitchen expect now he had his phone pressed to his ear. Coughing lightly to announce her presence she watched Happy look over his shoulder at her before looking away and saying a quick parting to whoever he was on the phone to before he pocketed his cell and turned to look at her properly.

"Gimme a minute."

"Okay." True to his world Happy was back in no time and they were heading out the door.

Thirty minutes after leaving Happy's place they were pulling up outside Piney's cabin. Happy kicked down the kick stand and cut the engine. She was pulling off the helmet when Happy finally started talking to her. He hadn't said a word since he told her to give him a minute.

"I'll wait out here for ya." Nicole cocked a brow, she hadn't expected that. Easing herself from behind him she moved beside him so that she could look at him.

"You don't have to."

"Clay's holding church at his house in an hour Jax wants me to drop you there." _Ah so it was Jax who had called. _That didn't surprise her. She nodded her head and handed him the helmet. "You want me to come in?"

"Nah I think I can handle the old man." This time it was his turn to nod.

* * *

"So what's with the guard dog?" Piney asked glancing out the window at Happy as he passed. Nicole smiled as she took the cup of coffee he was offering her. She took a sip and choked when she realised that it was a Piney special. "So?" She looked up from her mug at Piney who was now sat across from her sipping on his own special brew of coffee, his eyes fixed firmly on her.

"He's just my lift Piney." She didn't miss the roll of his eyes.

"Not to sound ungrateful but what's this all about darlin?" Nicole decided to take another sip of the coffee, this time already knowing what to expect she didn't choke, in fact she enjoyed the warmth of the coffee combined with the slight burn of Whiskey.

Piney eyed her curiously. He wondered why she was here, wondered if this was going to turn into Teller argument number two. He hoped not because he wasn't sure if he was up for that.

"You were right Piney." She looked up at him and saw the raised brow on the old mans face. "I should have listened to you when you came to LA, I should have come home when you told me that Jay needed me. You were right I was being selfish."

"Sweetheart I never..."

"No Piney you were right I can see that now."

"This have anything to do with Clay pulling you out on that missing brick?" Nicole just shrugged. She still didn't know what to make of that and so far she had avoided any conversation she could about it.

"Yes." She answered honestly. "What happened at the warehouse not just with me but Miles and Juice...Shit like that shouldn't be happening. Clay is losing it the whole club is."

"The vote yesterday, Bobby is pushing for change of leadership."

"That doesn't surprise me. How does that stand now after the shooting?"

"It's been pushed back till all this shit has been dealt with".

"I want to help Piney." She was surprised when he started shaking his head. Weeks ago he had come to her in LA and pretty much begged her to come back to Charming and help, and when she was finally ready to do that Piney didn't want her to she didn't get it. "Piney..."

"I was wrong sweetheart, this isn't your mess to clean up and the way things are I don't want you getting caught up in all of this."

"But you said yourself I'm the only who can get through to Jay." Nicole moved from her seat and came to kneel in front of Piney taking hold of one of his hands. "Please Piney. You have to let me help I can't just sit back and watch my family fall apart."

Piney smiled down at the young woman in front of him. He loved the girl like his own. He remembered when she first came to live with John and Gemma. She was a shy, timid little thing but that wasn't surprising after what she had suffered through. But she came through it fighting and Piney had watched her grow from that little girl who wouldn't say boo to a ghost into a beautiful young woman who could handle pretty much anything life could throw at her and all with a smile on her face. Her love grew as well over the years, after her fathers poor treatment of her towards the end he wondered if she would ever be able to love someone, but she did. She may find it hard to accept love but she gave her whole heart to her family and she was proving that now.

The love she had for her family was the reason Piney went to her for help but he realised now that it was wrong of him. She loved her family too much. Getting them out of this Cartel deal was going to be hard, Clay would dig his heals in and he realised that she should never be put in the middle of that. And not just because of her love for her step Uncle but because Piney had a horrible feeling that Clay wouldn't hesitate to put her harms way.

"I was wrong to ask you to get involved." He ran a thumb over her cheek. "This is club business sweetheart. Plus trust me I have this under control."

"Under control?" Nicole asked skeptically, an eyebrow raised which made Piney chuckle.

"I may be old darlin but I still have some uses."

"That I don't doubt." They both laughed before Nicole went back to being serious. She stood to her feet but stayed positioned in front of Piney. "Just do me one thing."

"Sure darlin."

"Be careful, Clay he's...he's losing it he's getting in to deep with them." By them she meant the Cartel. She stepped back as Piney got to his feet. His arms pulling her into a hug.

"Will do sweetheart. Will you do one thing for me?" Nicole nodded her head against his chest. "Make sure Jax remembers who his real father is, what he stood for." Nicole lifted her head so she could look at him.

She loved John he had been a surrogate father to her and she had always done her best to honor his memory but that was before Jax had told her about what had happened in Ireland, before she knew about Maureen and Trinity. When she heard all that she had seen a different side to John a side that she wasn't comfortable with especially after witnessing the hurt that that truth had caused Jax.

"I love John always will, but he messed up Piney. He bailed on everyone, his club, his family and for what some piece of ass. He had a kid with her Piney. He betrayed Gemma and Thomas. I'm sorry I don't think Jay can forgive that and I'm not sure anything I say will change that." She pulled out from his embrace. Her arms folding across her chest. "And I'm not sure I want to." Piney was about to respond when a knock on the door interrupted them. She watched Piney's eyes move to over her shoulder. She didn't need to turn around to know it was Happy. She was actually glad that he was interrupting them because she didn't want to continue this conversation. Leaning up on the balls of her feet she placed a kiss on his cheek.

"Be careful old Man."

"You too sweetheart." She returned his smile before turning on her heels and heading over to Happy who was waiting by the door for her. "You look after this one." Piney shouted after them. She watched Happy nod his head and she rolled her eyes at him making him smirk.

"Come on, take me home."

"Sure thing Kid."


	22. Chapter 22

Thanks for all the reviews and adds love you all xx

Everything Changes

Chapter Twenty Two

Juice stared at the ugly red mark on the left side of his neck, he could see the bruising starting to develop already. Last night he had prepared himself to take his own life but it turned out he couldn't even do that right. He pressed his fingers over his closed eyes, trying to stop his tears. He was pathetic in every way imaginable. And he hated himself more than ever. But a small part of him was glad that the branch had snapped because it made him realise that he didn't want to die. Again he thought how pathetic he was.

Killing himself no longer an option for him he knew he had to think of another way out because he couldn't stay. And like just like so many times recently he found himself thinking of Nicole, but this time he wasn't thinking about how he was betraying her family he was thinking about how many times she had run and how many times she had managed to keep herself completely hidden. She had done it in Nevada and now she had managed when they had gone inside. If she could do it then so could he, she didn't even have the skills that he had.

Opening his eyes and looking at himself and his neck once again. He needed to decide what to do. Run or give intel on the Sons.

* * *

Nicole followed Happy into Clay and Gemma's house which was currently over run with Sons. It looked like Gemma had taken advantage of Clay deciding to use their house for church by using it as an excuse to put together a family breakfast. She had to smile to herself if there was one thing Gemma loved it was looking after her family. Maybe sometimes a little too much but that was Gemma.

Noticing her niece through the sea of sons Gemma started making her way to her. She looked surprisingly well considering what had happened yesterday which was very un-Nicole like. Gemma noticed how close Happy was standing behind her and that her head was slightly tuned towards him as he whispered something to her. Gemma wanted to see her reaction but her view was cut off. _Jesus Christ. _Moving around Bobby Gemma continued to head for niece and the killer who had now put some distance between them although not much.

"Morning Baby." Gemma pulled her into a hug. She looked over at Happy. "Hap." The man nodded his head before moving around the two towards the buffet table. "How you doin' baby?" Gemma pulled Nicole from her chest so she could have a better look at her. She really did look okay, and Gemma guessed that it was something to do with the man who had just walked away, although she hoped it didn't she wasn't sure that them starting that shit up again was good for either of them or anyone else for that matter.

"I'm okay..." She watched the Queen arch a brow at her. "Seriously Gemma, I'm good."

"You know he wasn't right for you, this life." _Typical Gemma. Never one for sugar coating anything. _

"I know."

"So your staying in Charming?"

"Yeah I guess I am as long as I have a place to stay."

"This is your home you always have a place here." Gemma didn't care how long Nicole was going to stay in her house because she was happy that her niece was here to stay. She had missed her.

"Thanks Aunt Gemma."

"So you spent the nig..."

"Don't go there, don't ruin this..." Nicole snapped cutting Gemma off. Nicole knew where she was going with this and she also knew that it would turn into an argument and Nicole really couldn't be bothered with that.

"I never said anything." She remarked with a smirk.

"Well lets keep it that way." Nicole kissed her Aunt on the cheek before stepping away from her.

* * *

Nicole finally managed to escape. On her way to grab some breakfast it tuned out that Gemma wasn't the only who had something to say on the subject of her Fiancé. Most of the guys past comment on how she was better than him, how he was asshole, she even had a few offers to take him out.

Her family was so dysfunctional, but she couldn't help but love every single one of them.

Heading for the door she found herself being stopped once again, this time by a hand wrapping around her arm.

"Koz look I was serious, he's a good guy I don't want him killed." Even though she was serious she couldn't stop smiling at him well that was until she registered the look on his face then her smile disappeared. "What...what's wrong?" She moved with ease as Kozik pulled her further aside from everyone else, unbeknownst to both of them that a pair of dark eyes were watching them intensely. "Your scaring me wh..."

"I went after Darby." Nicole swallowed hard. Scared of what was going to come next. "He's gone Nicky." Her eyes widened, she hadn't expected that. But he's words still didn't ease her.

"Gone...what do you mean gone?"

"Went to his house and to the cabin you told me about. It looks like he's cleared out. He's gone darlin'." Nicole knew that she should be relieved by this but for some reason she wasn't. This wasn't like Darby he wasn't the type to run especially now, he wouldn't pass up on an opportunity to mess with her. "Nicky this is a good thing."

"Yeah, I guess."

"What?"

"It's just it's...don't you think it's just a bit convenient." Kozik sighed. She was always waiting for the other shoe to fall, and it was sad. She was to young to be thinking like that. He ran his hand up and down her arm, in an attempt to try and comfort her.

"Stop worrying." _Well that's not going to happen. _But even though she thought that she never voiced it, instead she thought it would be best just to drop it for now. So she smiled sweetly at him, thanked him again and excused herself.

Walking outside to the back garden Nicole took a deep breath her eyes wondering up to the morning sky as her hands rested on her hips.

"Tough morning?" Nicole spun around and found Opie sitting in a garden chair puffing on a cigarette. She hadn't even seen him when she came outside.

"Tough life." She told him as she walked over to him.

"Yeah I get that." Opie offered his smoke to her which she accepted taking a long drag before handing it back to him. "Heard what happened yesterday with you Fiancé."

"Ex Fiancé. And it's fine." Nicole took a seat beside his chair on the step. Again accepting the cigarette that was being offered.

"You might not be the only one with an Ex." Nicole looked at him confused. "Lyla's gone to stay with her sister." She handed him back the cigarette.

"Shit Ope, I'm sorry. You okay?" Opie never answered. "Well as much as I would love to give you some advice here, I really don't think I'm the right person to be giving relationship advice." She was glad to see him smile.

"Yeah, well I don't seem to be any good at them either."

"What are like Ope..?" Opie shrugged before leaning forward onto his elbows. "Hey how bout we make a deal if your marriage goes down the pan and i have no one by the time I'm 30 how bout we hook up." They looked at one another for a minute before they both started laughing.

"That would be like stepping into Tig territory, your like my sister."

"Yeah guess your right."

"We're sitting down." Both of them turned to see Jax standing in the doorway. "What so funny?"

"You don't want to know." Opie remarked as Nicole got to her feet. Jax stepped out and wrapped his arms around her and Nicole couldn't stop herself pulling him closer. Jax was exactly what she needed right now.

She heard Opie tell Jax that he would meet him inside. She was glad that Jax didn't pull away from her straight away because she was enjoying his comfort. But even though he hugged her longer than he probably should have considering they were about to sit down for church, it was too soon for her when he pulled back.

"You a'right."

"Yes..No..." Nicole laughed. Her head falling back on her shoulders as she again looked up at the morning sky hoping it would have some answers.

"Nic..." The concern in her cousin voice brought her eyes back to his.

"You around sometime today?"

"Not sure."

"Will you let me know. Could really do with a little cousin time right now." Jax smiled and pulled her back against him. Dropping a kiss onto the top of her head.

"I'll make sure I make the time."

"Will you do me another favor?"

"What?"

"Will you keep an eye on Juice." Jax pushed her back gently a little confused by her request. Picking up on this Nicole continued. "I'm worried about him. All this shit with Miles..." She trailed off not wanting to divulge her other worries about Juice just yet. Happy may have told her to stay away but that didn't mean that she couldn't make sure that someone was looking out for him.

"Yeah." He draped his arm over her shoulder and started leading her back into the house . "I'll check in with him when he gets back." Nicole stopped and looked up at Jax.

"Back from where?"

"He called Chibs this morning. Roosevelt pulled him for another piss test." He watched her hand shoot up to her necklace as she nervously played with the attached ring. He knew what that meant and he didn't like it. But before he could question her about it Clay was in front of them. He looked up at him as he motioned Jax inside. He figured Clay probably wanted to talk to her about what had gone down at the warehouse but Jax was unsure about leaving her with Clay. But Nicole who also seemed to realise this as well as sensing Jax's resistance to leave turned to her cousin.

"It's okay." Jax nodded and pressed a kiss to her temple before making his way inside. His hand patting Clay's arm as he passed him.

Nicole folded her hands across her chest. She knew what was coming, well it was either one of two things. Either he was going to apologise for accusing her of stealing the blow or he was going tell her he had no choice and blame her because she shouldn't have been up there in the first place. Probably a mixture of the both knowing Clay. And right now she wasn't really ready to hear any of it. She had to much on her mind, and really couldn't do with another fight. _Sometimes you just have to let pick your fights. _And Piney had already told her that he had this fight handled. So before he started Nicole decided to stop this before it got started.

"We're good Clay." She registered his shock but didn't give him a chance to say anything. "It was a shitty situation. You were put in a difficult situation weirdly I get that." She unfolded her arms and moved closer to him, leaning onto her tiptoes she kissed him on the cheek. "We're good and I love you." She whispered falling back onto the balls of her feet.

"Love you to Princess." She smiled and went to head inside when Clay stopped her by catching hold of her hand. She looked over her shoulder at him. "You know I will do what ever it takes to protect this family." It was strange, his words came out of nowhere.

"I know." He smiled at her before letting her ago as she continued inside.

Her words weren't lies she knew that Clay would protect his family and it was that that scared her. When Clay talked about family she was under no illusion that he didn't just mean herself, Jax, Gemma or his grandchildren, his vision of family included the club. He was one of the old ones taking the rule that the club came above everything and everyone very seriously and if his reputation as President was put on the line- like he said- he would do whatever it took to protect his reputation. He had proved that when he threatened to kill Jax if he didn't drop the whole Donna thing. Clay would do anything he had to to prevent losing his club and Nicole knew that was why Piney didn't want her involved in whatever it was that he was planning. She just hoped that the old man knew what he was doing.

* * *

Eli Roosevelt found himself staring in the mirror and not recognising the man staring back at him.

When he had agreed to join forces with Linc Potter he thought that this was finally going to be the answers to his prayers. But that wasn't the case. Although the case for Rico seemed to be heading in the direction Linc had planned- his sights now set on Otto Delany to build a case of the Sons past misdemeanor's Roosevelt found himself wishing he had never agreed to all of this. It wasn't because of the under hand way Linc Potter was using the unsolved murder of Otto Delany's wife or the fact that she had been sleeping with one of his brothers to try and get him to rat on his club, it wasn't even the underhand tactics he had used to get Juice to pull a sample of the blow. It was the harsh red bruises that marred the skin on Juice's neck that got him rethinking all of this.

Juice had walked into his office just a few hours ago asking him for protection. It was clear to Roosevelt that the man standing in front of him was, lost scared and confused. And it was when he got to his feet to approach him that the red marks caught Roosevelt's eye. Instantly he knew what the marks were from, he had attempted to take his own life, because Roosevelt was almost certain that if his own brothers had tried to straggle him to death they would have succeeded.

Knowing that he had tried to take his own life Roosevelt couldn't help but feel a little bit responsible for that.

Not wanting Juice to cause himself any more harm Roosevelt decided that it was time to finally let him in on exactly who was behind this. Linc Potter. Roosevelt would leave it to the Us Attorney to explain everything. He hoped that it would have helped but it hadn't. Instead he ended up with one of Juice's fists to his face.

Tilting his head to the side he knew that by tomorrow his cheek would be bruised.

Juice had been detained after that so Roosevelt hadn't seen him. He wondered what would happen now, what Linc would ask of Juice. Whatever it was Roosevelt just hoped that it wouldn't push Juice to that low place he had been at when he'd attempted suicide.

Leaving the station bathroom he made he way down to his office only to be headed off by Officer Candy Eglee.

"Sir, I'm really sorry I tried but..." Roosevelt could sense the woman's nerves. Obviously something had happened in the time he had spent in the bathroom second guessing himself.

"Stop who?"

"Nicole."

"Miss Teller?" Candy nodded.

"She's waiting for you in your office. She wouldn't take no for an answer."

"It's okay Candy." He patted his hand against her arm in a comforting way. Candy Eglee may have some sort of friendly alliance with the Sons, mostly during her time spent under the wing of Unser but at the end of the day she was a good officer so if she said that she had tried he was sure that was true. "I'll handle this."

* * *

Nicole sat in the visiting chair in Roosevelt's office, he fingers lacing around her necklace. After hearing yet again that Juice had been pulled in Nicole couldn't let it go. It was all too much of a coincidence at that was something Nicole didn't believe in. There was no such thing as coincidences not in her fucked up life anyway.

As her hands continued to lace around her necklace she found herself thinking about Happy and his warning. He had told her that this was club business and that she should stay away from Juice and although she wasn't actually here talking to Juice she knew Happy wouldn't be to pleased if he knew she was here. He wasn't trying to be overbearing throwing his weight around just to prove he could, he had told her those things to protect her and Nicole started thinking that maybe this wasn't a good idea. If Happy did know something like she thought he did then maybe she should just let him handle this. It wasn't as if Happy wasn't capable.

Second guessing herself Nicole got to her feet, deciding to just do as Happy had asked. She was just going to leave and go back to spending the day with her two favorite little men, Thomas and Abel. She really shouldn't be here but just as she made it to the door she bumped into Roosevelt.

"Miss Teller." Roosevelt was surprised to find her on her feet but he just presumed that she was probably about to go in search of him.

Nicole pulled herself together. Although she had decided that this was a bad idea now that Roosevelt was standing in front of her she knew that she didn't really have a choice she had to do this she had to say what she came here to say. His hand extended to chair she had just vacated.

"Please take a seat." Nicole made her way back to the seat she had just left, as Roosevelt made his way round his desk taking the seat across from her. "So what can I do for you Miss Teller. Something tells me that this isn't a social visit."

"No, it's not."

"Thought not." The smile spreading across the mans face pissed her off but then she noticed him wince ever so slightly and as she tilted her head a bit she caught sight of his swollen cheek.

"You should probably put some ice on that."

"Sorry?"

"Your cheek." Nicole pointed to his face. "Looks nasty." And she would know. Nicole had suffered more bruised cheeks in her life than half the Sons. Of course most of that was thanks to her abusive ex. At least he wasn't a worry anymore.

"I'll bare that in mind. So...?"

"Juice." Roosevelt stilled for a moment a little unsure on how he should handle this. He knew exactly where it was going but he couldn't give her anything.

"Juice?"

"Yes. Now I haven't come here for answers I've come here to warn you."

"Warn me?" He asked with smirk. He had to give the woman props she had balls to walk into a Police station and tell the Sheriff that she was here to warn him but then again she may look all innocent but he wasn't fooled. Nicole Teller was the Samcro Princess she had been raised by none other than John and Gemma Teller and then by Clay Morrow. She was not to be taken lightly.

"You need to leave him alone. I have no idea what you are doing with him but I'm telling you it stops now."

"Mr Ortiz has only come here to provide a sample..." He stopped when Nicole spoke over him.

"I'm not stupid I know all that piss testing is bullshit. Do you have any idea what you're doing, the damage you could cause." She shook her head. "I thought your lot would have learnt your lesson by now."

"Lesson?"

"Stahl." Roosevelt had heard all the stories about the ATF agent and how she was brutally murdered. All the evidence pointed to the IRA but nothing was ever proven so no arrests were made, but he had heard another version of the story. In that version it was the Sons who played center stage. And he had to admit he believed that version more. And although he highly doubted that he was about to get a confession from Miss Teller he was intrigued to hear what she had to say.

"Stahl?"

"She tried playing this game you are but she went all the way, set Ope up to look like a rat. Long story short his wife got caught in Stahl's little web. She was murdered in a drive-by shot with an AK in the back of her head."

"Taken out by the Son's." Nicole smirked a little humorless laugh falling from her lips.

"No..." She told him shaking her head. Grabbing her bag off the floor beside her, she slung it on her shoulder before leaning on his desk. "Her blood was on Stahl's hands. And guess what you keep up this shit with Juice and something happens to him...his blood will be on your hands. You think you can live with that?" Roosevelt couldn't answer her. She was right he was already feeling guilty for what was happening to Juice if he had succeed in his suicide attempt then it would be his fault and he wasn't sure he could handle that."It stops now. Put and end to it before someone ends up hurt."

* * *

Nicole slid into the passenger seat of Neeta's SUV making sure to close the door quietly behind her, even though she felt like slamming it. But Thomas was fast asleep and she couldn't bare the thought of waking him.

"All sorted?" Neeta asked. Nicole tried not to look at the woman beside her because she knew if she did she would burst into tears. The woman always had a way of getting information out of her, but this time this wasn't her secret to tell.

The guilt she had just witnessed on Roosevelt's face had confirmed every suspicion she had. Juice was working with the Police, doing what, she was still unsure but no good ever came from a Son working with the police.

Pulling her sunglasses from her bag she placed them on her face glad that her eyes were covered. Feeling a little more brave she turned towards Neeta.

"Yeah." Her voice sounded pathetic and she knew it and as soon as the words had left her mouth she turned to look out of the window. Wiping the tear that had escaped.

Shit was about to get bad.


	23. Chapter 23

Everything Changes 

Chapter Twenty Three

"You know the whole point of this cousin time is to talk." Jax spoke nudging Nicole's leg with his knee as they sat on top of the roof top.

He had picked her up from his house and offered her a lift. He hadn't forgotten her request from earlier that morning. She wanted to catch up and after what had happened yesterday between her and Liam he to wanted to check in with her. That morning she had been putting on a brave face for everyone but he knew that it was just an act and she was proving that even more right now. She hadn't really said a word since they climbed up onto the roof and when Nicole went quiet it was never a good thing.

"Hey." He nudged her again, this time getting a reaction. She turned away from the spot she had been staring at and gave him a tight lipped smile. "You a'right?"

"Yeah."

"No your not."

"Well if you know the answers why bother asking." When she snapped at him she saw his eyes narrow in on her. She didn't mean to snap at him, she was just so annoyed by everything and so confused at the same. Today had gotten her nowhere. Yes she may know deep down in her heart that Juice was working or at least doing something he shouldn't be with Roosevelt but she couldn't go to anyone. She couldn't breathe a word because she was so scared that the whole mess would be a deja vu of Donna, and she would not have any more blood on her hands she just couldn't. But on the other hand as she stared at her cousin she felt the anger rise above everything. Jax was her life she loved him so much and to believe that Juice could hurt not only him but the rest of the Sons scared the shit out of her and all she wanted to do was tell Jax everything she knew, to protect him. Nicole just didn't know what the hell to do.

"Nic what is it? This about Liam?"

"I don't know, you ever just the get the feeling that no matter what you do, no matter how hard you try everything just gets fucked up anyway."

"I think that sums up our whole life Nic."

"I guess."

"I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for Jay."

"Yeah I do. If you hadn't of come back you would probably still be with Liam, you'd be happy. You'd be enjoying your life."

"Liam and I were not to meant to be I knew that all along. I was just with him because I thought you were dead and that I couldn't come back home. But when I found out you were alive I think deep down that I knew that we were never going to survive. I loved him but I wasn't in love with him. Do you understand that?" Jax nodded. He didn't dare speak because he was afraid that she might stop talking and this was the first since her return that she had really opened up to him. "I was going to end it with him yesterday, but him getting shot kind of fucked that all up." She tucked a stray piece of hair behind of her ear turning her head slightly so she could look at Jax. He smiled at her and pulled her against his side. Kissing the top of her head. "Your being careful right?" Jax pulled back slightly so he could look at her.

"What do you mean?"

"It's just...I've noticed the club is a bit divided lately...I..just...want to make sure you're watching your back..." Jax was shocked even with all the shit she had going on she still didn't miss a thing when it came to club and she was looking out for him.

Today had been one of the worst so far since his release. Today they had set up a meet with Laroy about their new alliance with the other Cartel. Lobo Sanoro. Turned out they had cut Laroy some sort of deal with drugs but that deal was putting both of them in a middle of a Cartel beef which was somewhere neither of them wanted to be. Although at first Laroy hadn't seen it that way it took Jax putting himself in front of Gallindo and the loaded gun Luis was aiming at Laroys head for the President of the Niners to realise that Jax wasn't being over dramatic when he told him that they could both get killed because of this war.

But it wasn't just Laroy's eyes that had been opened.

Today had been to close of a call for Jax. After taking part in a shoot out with the Lobos and then getting into it with Clay-Jax jaw flexed with the memory of Clay's words '_Doctor pussy cloudin' who you are son' _Jax shouldn't have just threatened to pound his hands into the Redwood he should of just done it. He was sick of Clay, he was the one who got them into this and he didn't even seem to care and that was it for Jax he was done. He needed out now before Clay got the whole god damn club killed.

Which is why he had decided to take this little trip to Providence with Tara. No one knew it yet not even Tara herself but after today he needed a break. He needed space to think of a way out not only for himself and his family but for his brothers. But the only thing that was making him nervous about leaving was the girl sitting next to him.

She was nearly 27 a grown woman in most peoples eyes but in his she was his baby cousin. A cousin who it was ingrained in him to look after. Although he hadn't exactly been doing a good job of that at late. Jesus her relationship had just broke down and the first thing he did was pack her off with a guy who she had history which probably wasn't a help to her and now he was just going to up and leave her. And it was harder than he thought it would be.

But he had to go. Reaching into the inside of his cut Jax pulled out of his spare pre pays which had grabbed before they had left the house.

"Take this." Nicole took the phone from him even though she looked confused. "Tara's taking a trip to Providence for some doctor shit. I told her to take the boys and stay there until I get things sorted here."

"Okay. But why do I need..."

"I'm going with her. I'm going to drive her up stay the night then catch a ride back with one of the guys from Rogue River."

"Things that bad huh?" Jax smiled at his cousin, she didn't miss a thing. And although he would love to tell her differently, that everything was going to be okay he couldn't lie to her.

"Yeah. This deal..." Jax shook his head his hand running over his tired face. "It's bad for the club I realise that now. I was stupid I believed Clay, believed that this deal would be good for the club. I was wrong."

"We all make mistakes Jay. No one could have predicted the shit storm that would come with this deal."

"You did. When I told about the deal you warned me, told me that I should get out. If I had listened to you that day none of this shit..." Nicole shook her head.

"No. You can't do this Jay you can't blame yourself."

"I know it's just..."

"It's a shit fucked up situation but when is anything in our life not fucked up. We're Tellers remember." Jax chuckled.

"Yeah..."

"You'll handle this." God he wished he had as much faith himself as she seemed to have him because right now he didn't think he could handle it.

"I'm sorry I'm leaving you I know the timings shit with everything you've got going on."

"I'm okay." He gave her a _don't lie to me _look and Nicole laughed. "Okay well maybe everything's not okay but you've got to go."

"Just promise to call me if anything happens or you just need to talk..."

"I will I promise."

"Good." He kissed her again.

"Hey maybe when you get back we could go up to the graves, visit my Mom and Dad...John.." Nicole studied him for a minute. She remembered what Piney had asked of her. _"Make sure Jax remembers who his real father is, what he stood for."_ Now Nicole wasn't sure she could do that but maybe a trip up the graves might help a little. Jax never gave a solid answer just nodded. She wasn't surprised. "Okay well if your off tomorrow I better let you go. Does Tara know that your going on this little trip with her."

"Nah kind of a last minute idea."

"Well maybe it will put a smile on her face then." Tara had been in one hell of a mood when she had come home which was why Nicole jumped at the chance to go for a ride with Jax.

"Was she that bad?"

"Oh yes, thought I could through a hissy fit." Her comment made Jax laugh.

"Trust me you can." Nicola playfully slapped his chest making him laugh more. "Come on..."

The two made their way down from the roof and walked over to Jax's bike. Jax swung his leg over and snagged his helmet off the handle bars.

"You want me to wait follow you back?"

"Nah I'll be fine."

"A'right. Remember call me if you need me."

"Promise."

Nicole pocketed the phone and watched Jax pull out the lot before turning on her heels and heading to the office. Gemma was sat in her usual spot behind the desk, glasses perched on the bridge of her nose as she shuffled through the various papers scattered over the desk.

"Was that Jackson?" Gemma asked not bothering to look up from the papers. It didn't take a genius to figure out that she was pissed and it also didn't take a genius to put two and two together.

"Yeap." Nicole took a seat in the chair across from Gemma. "So you going tell me what's got you so pissed or rather what T did?" This time Gemma looked up at her Niece a knowing smirk on her face.

Gemma had to it give to Nicole 14 months out of the life hadn't done anything to dampen her skills, she was still as sharp as ever. She reminded her so much of herself. And if Gemma would want anyone by her side top help navigate through this shit storm it would her. But Gemma couldn't drag her into this because it would ruin everything. If Nicole found out the truth she would lose not only her but Jax as well. And Gemma couldn't bare that.

That was why she had argued with Tara today she had tried to make her see that burning those letters was best for everyone, tried to tell her that it wouldn't just be Gemma that would lose everything she would to. Tara of course had been confused so Gemma spelt it out for her told her that if Jax knew the truth he would kill Clay. Gemma knew that Tara wanted out of the MC life but she also knew that if Jax killed Clay he wouldn't leave.

Of course Gemma didn't really want Jax to leave with Tara and her two granbabies but she could deal with that after. The letters were the important issue here. They needed to be destroyed. The rest could wait.

Unser had called her today, and just as Gemma started to explain that she thought this mess might be over he confessed that Clay knew that those letters were copies. That confession changed everything. Clay was already slipping away, buckling underneath all the pressures, all his mistakes. And not only did that mean bad things for their marriage it meant bad things for everyone. He was acting like a caged animal and Gemma just knew that when the beast got out no one was safe. Especially Tara and Piney. The two of them had already started digging their own graves and although Gemma would try and do everything she could to stop them from filling those graves, Nicole and Jax's safety were her main priority. They were her blood.

"Soooo..." Nicole watched her Aunt finally slip out of thoughts and return to her. "This because she's taking the kids to Providence?"

"You know bout that?"

"Jay just told me. He's going to."

"What?" Gemma threw the papers onto the desk.

"Ah..you didn't know."

"That boy tells me shit lately." Nicole could hear the bitterness in her voice. She was even more pissed and a pissed off Gemma was never fun. "This is bullshit you know that right?"

"It's just a one nighter Gem, Jay is coming home."

"But she's not, my granbabies aren't. And honestly how long do you think it will be before he leaves."

"You on about Jay leaving Samcro?" That was a sentence Nicole never thought she'd hear herself say.

"Tara wants out of this life...again. But this time she's wants him with her. Fucking bitch is pulling him from his family." Nicole rubbed the back of her neck.

If she was honest she didn't like the thought of Jax leaving anymore than Gemma did but she wasn't going to try and stop him, how could she when she had done it so many times herself. If he had to do this, if he had to leave then that was what he had to do.

"You know you can't say anything to him right?" Gemma eyes shot to Nicole's. "If you tell Jay he can't go and start preaching to him about family he'll just dig his heels in even more and he'll be leaving Charming quicker just to piss you off."

"You could talk to him he listens to you."

"No. I'm not gonna do that Gem. If he wants to leave I'm not going to try and stop him."

"Why the hell not I know you don't want him gone any more than I do."

"Your right I don't. But he obviously needs to this, I've been there I understand it. Sometimes you just need a break from all this." Nicole ignored Gemma's huffing and continued. "But at the same time I also know that no matter how much you do run from this you can't you it's in our blood. How many times have I run and come back Gem?"

"So what are you saying?"

"Let him do this. Because he'll come back, Samcro's in his blood just like it is in mine no matter how many times I've tried to deny it."

"When did you get so smart?" Nicole shrugged, a smile on her lips.

"So where's my new ride?" Nicole didn't like how Gemma's smirk grew as she chucked a pair of keys at her. "Your kidding me." Nicole recognised the key chain on the keys immediately.

"Nope. It's all we got."

"That truck hates me." Nicole had lost count of how many times the battery had died on her or the tyre had blown out. Jax's old truck hated her and she hated the truck. At least it was a mutual feeling.

"Well tough shit sweetheart your stuck with it."

"Fine." Nicole headed for the door but stopped when Gemma called her back.

"You seen Clay?" Nicole shook her head.

"I've been at Jay's all day why? Everything okay?"

"Yeah... just he ain't here wondered where he got to that's all."

"He's probably at home passed out in front of the TV."

"Yeah probably."

"You want me to get him to call if he's at home."

"No it's okay. I won't be long."

"Okay. Night ."

"Night Baby." Gemma lent back in her chair wondering where her husband had got to because she knew that he wasn't at home. She had not long come from there hoping to find him at the clubhouse but was unsuccessful. And to make matters worse and to cause her more worry he wasn't answering his phone.

* * *

Clay knew that this time would come. Piney was never going to just sit by and let this Cartel deal go. It wasn't in the old man's nature. So Clay wasn't surprised when he had called him up to come up to the cabin and talk. Piney wanted to throw his weight around and probably try and threaten him again but Piney was mistaken if he thought Clay was just going to sit back and let that happen this time.

No this time Clay had his own agenda which was why he had agreed to this little meet. Tonight he was finally going to put a stop to this. And it seemed that Piney had already guessed that Clay was coming for his own reasons if the way he opened the door with a shot gun was anything to go by.

"You gonna pull the trigger or let me in?" Piney scanned the surroundings quickly making sure that Clay hadn't brought any friends.

"Give me the nine." Piney ordered once he was satisfied that it was just the two of them. Clay obliged and handed over his gun followed by the one in his boot Piney told him to remove next.

Piney took the guns. If he had bothered to take a closer look or focus on something rather than his hate for the man in front of him he might have noticed that he was wearing gloves. There was only ever one reason a Son wore gloves when they weren't riding.

"So what's this all about?" Clay asked as Piney allowed him inside. He didn't miss the fact that Piney was still pointing the barrel of the shot gun at him.

"Your times up."

"I'm gonna need more time."

"No."

"Look I'm trying to do the right thing here."

"Who for you. Your greed is destroying this club and I won't let you do that. Stop this deal Clay."

"Okay." Clay dropped his head his hand running over his hair. "Okay." He looked back up at Piney. "I'll call Romeo." Walking towards the door he opened it and started walking out when he looked over his shoulder back at Piney. "If there's retaliation that bloods on your hands."

Piney watched Clay leave a little stunned he hadn't expected it to go that easily. And again if Piney wasn't consumed with so many other thoughts he wouldn't have let his guard or put the shot gun down as he went to lock the door behind Clay.

The force of the door being kicked open made Piney fall to the floor. And just as he to get to his feet Clay's heavy boot connected with his face. Sending Piney once again flat onto his back.

Clay picked up the shotgun as well as the weapons Piney had taken from him when he first entered and put them back in his boot and waistband.

"Where are the letters?" Clay yelled as he started throwing things around as he searched for them. "Where are they?"

"There not here." Piney answered breathlessly as he struggled back onto his feet. He watched as Clay ignored him and continued to ransack the cabin in search of the letters he didn't have. "I don't have them." Piney shouted the best he could considering he'd just had the wind knocked out of him.

Clay stopped looking and turned his attention to Piney. He started laughing, it was clear to him now that Piney never had the letters, anything he had got from them had come from Tara. Piney had been bullshitting his way through this all along.

"You've never had them, Tara told you all that shit you threatened me with." He spat as he walked towards Piney, shotgun now pointed at his chest.

"How..how would Tara know..about them."

"Because she had the letters." He snapped. The shock on Piney's face gave Clay great satisfaction. "You didn't know I knew that did you old man, I bet you don't know that I know that you were the one to go and get Nicole, to bring her back here. You shouldn't have done that."

"Leave them out of it." Piney's back was now pushed against the wall and the shotgun in Clay's hands was pressed against his stomach.

"To late." The shot rang throughout the cabin and Clay watched Piney's body slide down the wall leaving a trail of blood. He stood over him watching him take his last breath. He felt nothing, nothing but satisfaction. To him there was nothing else that could have been done to stop all of this, to stop his dirty secrets coming to light. He had no regrets. He would always do whatever it took to protect his family, his club.

He knew he didn't have time to clear up, so instead he stuck his gloved index finger into the bullet wound in Piney's chest and wrote the Lobo's tag in his blood on one of his old Samcros pictures hanging on the wall.

That was one dealt with that only Tara. Sliding behind the wheel of the tow truck he had driven he reached over into the glovebox and pulled out the black leather bound book that he had swiped the book from Tara's bag when she was at the clubhouse earlier visiting Gemma.

He wasn't really sure what he was looking for but when he came across her schedule planner he figured that would be a better place to start than any. And he was right. Flipping through the pages till he saw what he had hoping for. Marked with a little arrow taking up two days although their was a question mark at the end was a conference trip in Providence. And according to this she was leaving tomorrow.

This was just becoming to easy.

He pulled out the cell Luis had given him earlier. Clay had gone to Romeo and told him that they had a problem, an internal threat with a family member. He went on to tell him who it was and that the information she had could be very damaging for all of them. Romeo of course had no problem in offering his help. Which Clay had been grateful for. And Romeo as always had lived up to his word. When Luis handed him the phone he gave him strict instructions.

It had one number and one number only. Call it with a time and a place.

Once he called it there would be going back.

And the cost was $25,000.

They were all conditions Clay could live with, because again this was necessary. Tara needed to be stopped. Sure Jax would be hurt, livid and would want revenge but that to Clay was a better reality to the one where Jax knew what he had done to his old man. Jax would kill him meaning Clay would lose everyone he loved and everything he loved and that was just not an option.

Flipping open the phone he called that one number without even thinking about it.


	24. Chapter 24

Everything Changes

Chapter Twenty Four

It was just a smidgen past 7 and even after his late night Clay was up, dressed and ready to go all he had to do was sneak the $25,000 he needed out of the safe without Gemma or Nicole catching him.

He breathed a sigh of relief when he managed it but almost froze in shock when he walked into the kitchen to find his wife standing over the coffee pot. He hadn't even heard her, he just hoped she hadn't heard him.

"You were late last night?"

"Had some business to handle with the Cartel." Clay answered as he set down the rucksack full with their own personal money. The money he was going to use to pay off the man who was going to kill Tara. This was going to be a long day.

"Got an early start to Baby?" Gemma turned to face her husband. She was no fool. He was up to something and it worried the shit out of her especially now he knew that the chard letters she had given were nothing but copies. And now he was being all secretive, staying out till the early hours and then leaving at the crack of down. And she could have sworn she heard the safe being open and closed. She was scared of what he was planning to do, or rather who he was planning to do it to.

"Me and Jax have some Mexcian shit to sort out." And now he was lying straight to her face. According to Nicole Jax was going with Tara on her little trip today. But before she could call him out on his clear lie Nicole came bounding into the kitchen.

"Morning...Oooh is that ready I could kill for a coffee."

"In a minute."

"Here have mine, I've only had a mouthful." Nicole smiled. She was glad that her and Clay took their coffee the same because she couldn't wait a minute she needed caffeine now, she didn't function without it and sensing the tension building between her Aunt and Uncle Nicole knew she was going to need it.

Gemma watched her niece bounce over to Clay and accept the coffee he was offering. She kissed him on the cheek and as Clay pulled her into a brief hug Gemma couldn't stop her body from tensing. Never in her life had she been scared of Clay and what he was capable of till now. This shit with the letters had Clay on edge and that was a dangerous place for him to be as well as everyone around him. The only saving grace was that Nicole didn't know about any of this.

"Right well I've gotta go." Clay picked up the rucksack and passed his wife dropping a quick kiss onto her cheek before heading for the door, only stopping when Gemma called him.

"Clay." He sighed. His wife was smart and he knew it would take long before she started figuring things out.

"I've gotta go." He said as he glanced at her over his shoulder and left.

"You okay?" Gemma turned away from watching where her husband had just disappeared and turned to look at her niece who was now sat at the kitchen table. She looked a little worried.

"Yeah baby. I'm good."

Nicole did not believe that for a second. Gemma looked like she had the weight of the world on her shoulder but she gathered it was down to Jax leaving today and her fears of Tara stealing him away for good. Nicole had thought a lot about that last night and the more she thought about it the more angry she found herself getting with Tara. This wasn't the first time Tara had tried to make Jax choose between her and the club last time though Jax picked the club but this time it seemed that Tara had won.

It was a scary thought not having Jax around and Nicole could only imagine how Gemma felt about the fact that she could potentially be losing her son. They were close although Nicole knew that sometimes Gemma frustrated Jax with her overbearing mothering Jax loved the bones of his mother and vice versa. It would be hard for both not to have the other as a constant in their everyday life, but Nicole did find some reassurance in the fact that she still believed that if Jax left he would find his way back. The only reason why she was so sure of that was from her own personal experience. If she hadn't run so many times and came back home every time she might be more worried but Nicole knew that Samcro was in their blood and no matter how hard you tried you couldn't out run it. The call for Charming was too strong.

"You going to see Jay this morning?" Nicole took a sip of her coffee as Gemma came to join at the kitchen table, a cup of freshly brewed coffee in her hand.

"Yeah who knows how long it will before I see my granbabies again. You want to come?" Nicole shook he head as she swallowed a mouthful of coffee.

"I spent most of yesterday with them I'm good."

"Had your fill huh?" Nicole smiled.

"I love those little boys but yeah an afternoon is more than enough."

"So no kids for you any time soon then?"

"Hell no."

"Good. I may be trying to wrap my head around this you and Happy thing but I don't think I could handle baby killers running around the place." Nicole almost choked on her coffee. Hearing Gemma mention Happy and babies in the same sentence freaked her out.

"First off there is no _Me and Happy thing_ and secondly babies...with Happy. It would be a cold day in hell before that happened." Nicole saw the famous _don't bullshit _smirk appear on her Aunt's face and she knew she was about to give her a little Gemma Teller-Morrow advice on Happy which was something Nicole didn't want to hear which is why she was glad that the knocking on the front door interrupted them. Wasting no time, Nicole was on her feet and heading for the door.

"Good Morning, is Ms Teller here." The delivery man asked as he looked down at his electronic clipboard.

"Yes, I'm Miss Teller." That felt weird to say, she felt old.

"Ah...good will you sign here for me I have a couple of packages for you." Nicole signed in the small box the man had pointed to and waited as he walked back down the driveway. He brought two big brown cardboard boxes and brought them inside.

As she waved off the very cheerful delivery man Nicole stared at the two big boxes that were now in the living room.

"What are those?"

"I think there my things from LA."

"Oh." Gemma came to stand next to her niece. Even though she was glad that Liam was out of her life because that meant that she was staying in Charming Gemma knew that this was probably hard for her Niece. Nicole had obviously felt something for the guy. "You want me to stay and help you with this?"

"Nah. You should go see your boys I'll be okay."

"Your sure?"

"Got to be haven't I." Nicole turned to look up at Gemma when she felt her hand on her shoulder. "I'll be okay."

"Okay baby. I'll see you later. Don't let this shit drag you down. Feel it's to much step away from it." Gemma kissed her on cheek and grabbed her bag. She felt like she should stay with Nicole-even though she would deny it- she needed a little help to get though those boxes, but she had to go and see Jax, not just because he was leaving but she actually wanted to see if he was there because according to Clay they were supposed to be dealing with Mayan shit so if he was at home then Clay was lying.

Nicole waited for the sound of Gemma's SUV to pull away from the house before she moved over to one of the boxes. Receiving these had completely thrown her. She hadn't even thought about her things and to be honest she wasn't bothered about them. Nothing that was in that house held any value to her, so she didn't really care if she got them but Liam clearly thought differently.

After getting a knife from the kitchen Nicole opened the first box. It was full of clothes shoes etc nothing major. She turned to the other box, the smaller box. Tearing it open she came face to face with the picture she had taken from Jax's room before she left. It was of the two of them when they were younger. They both looked so happy, but the picture was different the glass in the frame was all cracked down the middle. Some might think the damage had happened during shipping but Nicole knew differently. Liam had done it, no doubt about that. She wasn't mad though the frame may be damaged but at least the picture was still intact.

The next photo she came across was of her and Liam but this picture had an envelope attached to the back. Ripping the envelope from the frame she took a seat on the floor and ripped open the letter.

_Sweets, _

_I think I have remembered to pack everything but if there is anything I have forgotten please let me know and I will ship it for you. I'm not going to lie it is killing me to have to pack away your things but I just couldn't have them around me, the reminder of you was too much because I miss you Nicole. I miss you so much I don't know what to do with myself. I love you. I am sorry for the way I handled things, I freaked out and by doing that I know I hurt you which is something I never want or wanted to do ever. But you were different there you made me so jealous when I watched you with them. It was like you were choosing them over me and it made me crazy that I might lose you because you mean the world to me and if there was anything I could do to take back my actions and have you still with me I would. I know it's asking a lot but maybe we could talk this doesn't have to be the end we could work through this we could figure out a way to make this work. I love Nicole and I'm here for you always. I know that we belong together. _

_Liam xxx _

Nicole paled but her stomach dropped even more as her engagement ring fell out of the envelope that had fallen to the floor. As she picked up the ring she felt the bile rise in her throat and before she knew it she was on her knees hugging the porcelain and emptying up her already empty stomach.

* * *

Gemma knew it...Jax hadn't gone with Clay and from what Jax had told her there was no Mayan problem. The things that were running through her mind right now were not good and she prayed to god that she was jumping to the wrong conclusions but just to be on the safe side she had to make sure everything was okay. Tara was with Jax so she knew that she was safe that just left Piney.

She parked her SUV at the cabin and started making her way up the porch steps. She knocked and waited but nothing she tried that again twice but when she got no reply on the third try Gemma decided to just let herself in.

It took her two seconds to find his body in a heap on the floor. And two more seconds for her tears to fall.

She knew this would happen, she knew Clay was on the edge. She should have done something she should have told Piney to back off warn him that Clay was on the brink. This was her fault. She could have stopped this.

* * *

Unser never liked receiving calls like that from Gemma but it seemed lately that all her calls seemed frantic. Dropping everything-not that he was doing much- Unser made himself presentable for the Queen and headed over to Piney's cabin where Gemma had asked him to meet her.

By the time he had got there Gemma had covered Piney's body with a sheet but that didn't stop the shock of seeing the old man with a bullet hole to his chest as he took a look.

"This was Clay." Unser stood back onto his feet and walked over to Gemma who was sat at the small round table. Unser should have been surprised by her words but he wasn't. After reading those letters he now knew the real Clay Morrow and this, killing Piney was nothing to Clay. But what did shock him were Gemma's next words. "We need to protect Clay."

"Protect Clay. Gemma this, Piney, it's just the beginning. He's like a wounded animal Gemma he's going to rip apart anything that gets to close."

"What are you saying?" Gemma didn't know why she asked that because she knew exactly what he meant but maybe she needed to hear someone else say it maybe it would show her that she wasn't over reacting.

"He's killed Piney, Tara could easily be next. She's the only other person who knows about the letters." Yeap that was exactly what Gemma needed to hear. "I'm sorry but I can't protect your Old Man anymore. I'm calling this in Gemma." That on the other hand wasn't what she wanted to hear.

"No."

"The next corspe your going to be standing over is the mother of your granchild. Are you ready for that? Clay cannot be saved." Gemma moved closer to Unser.

"He needs us Wayne. More than ever. What kind of wife would I be if I turn on him now?"

"One that wanted to survive."

"I love him." Gemma swallowed back the lump in her throat. "And we are all responsible for this. Our hands are just as bloody as Clay's." Unser knew that on some level she was right. They had all had a hand in JT's murder and Unser supposed that this was just a consequence of that so maybe he did owe Clay well maybe not Clay but Gemma. But he needed to know something first.

"Did you lie to me to? Did you know the real reason why Clay wanted JT dead? Him ending guns?"

"I supported Clay's decision. I know it was the best thing for the town and the club, my family. I never knew the details."

"I'm going to choose to believe that." Gemma knew he didn't really believe it so did what had to what she knew would convince him. She closed the remaining gap between them and cupped his face with her hands and gently pressed her lips on to his kissing him softly.

"I have to find those letters Wayne." She whispered as she pulled her lips from his. "I can prove to Clay that there's no threat. I know I can bring him close again I know I can. Please Wayne." Still recovering from the shock of Gemma's kiss Unser moved passed her.

"It looked like Clay try to point this at the other Cartel. I could help with that. Make sure that this doesn't blow back on him."

"Thank you."

"You should get out of here. I can handle this." Gemma wasted no time in grabbing her bag, afraid if she said anything or stayed any longer then he would change his mind. And she couldn't have that. So she left.

* * *

Nicole walked into the clubhouse still a little wobbly on her feet after her rather interesting morning. Spotting Kozik at the bar Nicole made her way to him.

"Hey what's going on?" Nicole asked as she looked over to the Chapel where Clay was pacing and Tig was on the phone wiping his hand over his face. She hadn't missed Chibs either who was sat on the edge of the pool table his own cell pressed to his ear.

"Clay wants Jax back here, Tig's trying to get hold of him but he's not answering."

"Why what's going on, why does Clay want Jay here?" Kozik shrugged.

"Something about not being safe to travel alone."

"And Chibs?"

"Juice is MIA. Roosevelt picked him up for another piss test but no ones seen him since." Nicole did not like the sound of that. Juice disappearing after a visit with Roosevelt in her mind only meant one thing. "You a'right?" Kozik finally looked at her for the first time since she had come to stand next to him and he didn't like what he was seeing. She looked pale and he could she her hands shaking slightly. And when she shook her head to his question he was on his feet and in front of her in seconds his hand resting on her elbow as she looked like her feet were about to give way. He quickly looked round the room and caught eye contact with Tig who still had the phone pressed to his ear but his eyes were now on Nicole. Kozik gave him a nod silently telling him he had this, and when Tig nodded back Kozik started to lead her to his dorm.

"So what is it?" Nicole pulled out her engagement ring and the letter from Liam and handed them both to Kozik as she took a seat on his bed.

"He sent all my clothes and things this morning that was inside one of the boxes. I never meant to do that him. I never wanted to hurt him Koz." He didn't answer her straight away as he was reading the letter but as soon as he was done he lifted his head up and looked at her. She looked so upset and Kozik wanted to make the drive to LA just so he could kick Liam's ass. What kind of guy did that. The whole letter was some bullshit kind of guilt trip, he was trying to make her feel bad for what had happened. The bastard was tying to guilt her back into going out with him. And by the looks of her he may have fucking succeeded.

"You know this letter is bullshit shit right." He told her as he bent down in front of her so they were eye level. He could see the tears behind her eyes.

"No it's not. He's right I was different..." Kozik wiped a hand over his face he was going to kill this fucker.

"Nicky you weren't right together you came to that decision yourself remember. This..." He held up the letter. "Is just bullshit. He's trying to make you feel guilty babe but you have nothing to feel guilty about."

"I hurt him..."

"And staying with him when you didn't really want to be with him you think that would be fair." Nicole shook her head. She knew he was right but the letter had just threw her. And so did the ring.

"Yeah your right."

"Course I am." He winked at her and gave him one of his famous smiles. She laughed so that was a good sign. "Come on." He got to his feet and held his hand out to her, which she accepted. When he pulled her to her feet he pulled her against him and hugged her tightly. He felt her arms wrap around him as she hugged him back. "You know what we need to do?"

"No." He pulled back from her and handed her back the letter.

"Tear it up sweetheart." Nicole raised her eyebrow at him questioning him. "Tear it up ain't nothing in there you need to read again so..." Nicole took a deep breath and took the letter from him and started tearing the letter into pieces. Kozik grabbed the wire bin from next to his dresser and held it in front of her. She smiled up at him as she dropped the pieces into the bin. "Good. Now you've gotta get rid of this. My guess it's probably worth a buck or two."

"Thousands actually." She took the ring from him and dropped it into her bag.

"Well I know I a guy, i'll make sure he won't rip you off."

"I'll keep that in mind."

"You ready to go back out there?"

"Yeah."

Nicole left Kozik as he went to take his seat back at the bar, and headed to the kitchen to grab herself a cup of coffee.

"She okay?" Tig asked as he joined Kozik.

"Not sure. You get a hold of Jax?"

"Nah. So what the deal?" Kozik sighed, Tig wasn't going to give up till he knew what was bugging Nicole so he told him. "Shit. Fuckin' should have kicked that guys ass as soon as he showed up, knew he was trouble."

"Yeah. Look don't say anythin' a'right she doesn't need to think about it again."

"Yeah a'right." Tig was about to turn his back on the kitchen where his eyes had been glued during his conversation with Kozik, but just as he turned he heard a glass smash.

"What is it?" Tig asked as he reached the kitchen to find Nicole on her knees picking up the shards of the broken cup.

"Gemma just called me...Jay...he...someone tried to take Tara. There at ." Tig ran a hand over his face. He turned to look over his shoulder at Kozik who had heard every word.

"Tell Clay." Kozik nodded and moved his ass to the Chapel while Tig helped Nicole to her feet.

"You think this was the Cartel?" Tig was expecting the question but the haunting look in her eyes sent a shiver down his spine.

"I don't know doll...I don't know." He wanted to say something to reassure the girl that he was now holding in his arms but he couldn't because he had no clue as to what was happening right now.

**Thanks for all the reviews and adds. Just to let you know that the next chapter will be rated M. Hope you enjoy xx**


	25. Chapter 25

Everything Changes

Chapter Twenty Five

Gemma ran down the corridors till she found the one she was looking for. She had received the panicked phone call from Jax as she was driving back from Piney's cabin. She was on her way to speak to Clay to tell him that she knew about Piney and that she understood and that Tara wasn't going to say anything about the letters to Jax. She wanted to try and prove to Clay that Tara wasn't a threat and he didn't need to hurt her but when she got Jax's call telling her that Tara was in hospital Gemma knew she was too late. Whatever had happened to Tara it had Clay written all over it.

As she reached the bottom of the corridor she saw Jax standing there just as Tara was being wheeled off.

"Are you okay baby?" Gemma reached up to touch her sons face.

"I'm fine."

"Where are they taking her?"

"X-ray." Jax looked over his shoulder at the police men that were waiting for him. "Look I've gotta talk to the cops Mom." He went to turn away but Gemma grabbed his arm pulling him back to her. She needed to hear what exactly happened she needed to know if her fears were true.

"What happened Jackson?"

"Someone attacked Tara. Tried to abduct her. I've gotta go." Gemma dropped her hold on him and watched her son disappear down the hall with the Policemen. She felt sick as it hit her. There was no doubt now that Clay had organised this but what made her feel sick to her stomach was the fact that her grandchildren had been there. They could have gotten caught in the cross fire. But that hadn't seem to cross Clay's mind.

She hadn't been sat in the waiting room for long when Clay and the others arrived. Gemma had been sat there going over things in head trying to rationalise everything but when Gemma looked up to see Clay walking towards her with Nicole close by his side everything became clear and Gemma knew exactly what it was she had to do.

"What happened?" She almost laughed at Clay's question. Like he didn't already know.

"Someone tried to take Tara."

"Oh my god." Gemma reached out for Nicole and pulled her into a hug. She would do anything to get her away from Clay right now. "How bad is it?"

"Bad." Gemma looked directly at Clay when she answered Nicole's question. She tried to catch a reaction from her husband but he was giving nothing away.

"Jesus...We know who did it?" Gemma shook her head. He may be able to lie to her face but Gemma found the lies sticking in her throat.

Clay blew out a breath and looked back at his brothers. They were all in shock but he could see the glint in their eyes. They wanted revenge for this and normally so would he. But this was him and if they pinned this on the Lobos that would mean they would have to speak to Gallindo, and he wasn't sure he liked that. It was their guy who did this, their guy who had fucked up, if his guys went at Gallindo, if Jax did-which he knew would, Jax would want blood for this-it could blow back on him and he couldn't have that. No he was going to have to try and do this alone.

* * *

Nicole waited as Jax talked to the others. She knew that Jax was telling them what he knew so that they could plan the retaliation. According to Gemma whoever had done this had done a good job on Tara so Nicole knew that Jax wouldn't be able to rest until whoever was responsible for the hurt caused to his future wife was six feet under. She hated that this was happening to him. Jax didn't deserve any of this and neither did Tara.

"Hey." Nicole looked up at Jax. He looked terrible but it was hardly surprising. Nicole got to her feet and pulled him into a fierce hug.

"I'm so sorry Jay." She whispered before letting him go and settling on to the balls of her feet. "How is she?"

"Her hand got smashed up. She's just gone into surgery."

"Shit. Do you know..."

"This had to be the Lobos. Only thing that makes sense. We're gonna go speak to Laroy see if he can help us out with contacting the them if not then were hitting up Gallindo."

"Your going now." It wasn't a question. "I'll stay here with her."

"Thanks Nic. I'll be back before she's out of surgery."

"Just be safe okay." Jax bent down and kissed her cheek.

"I will."

* * *

Clay couldn't believe how the day had turned out. He had prepared himself for the fallout but he had expected the fall out to be because Tara was dead, not that someone had tried to abduct her and smashed her hand up as she escaped. Jax was livid and wanted blood. Clay was just glad that he had managed to talk him off the ledge before he did something stupid. But he knew he wouldn't be able to stop him for long. Romeo had offered up a few Lobos to satisfy Jax's need for revenge and had also given him his money back. But none of that really mattered because Tara was still alive meaning so was the threat and it seemed that Clay wasn't the only one worried about that so was Romeo.

Even though Clay told him that any attempt on Tara now would be to risky Romeo just told him that it didn't matter she was threat not only to Clay but to their deal and he couldn't have that. Clay had to agree. He knew that now more than ever Tara would want to get herself and Jax out of Charming meaning she wouldn't hesitate in telling him about the letters if she thought that it would help get them out. He couldn't allow that to happen.

Bending down he opened the safe and deposited the money Romeo had given him back inside but just as he went to close the safe Gemma walked in. This was the last thing he needed.

"What's the matter changed your mind or get a refund because they didn't kill her." _Here we go._

"I don't know what the hell your talkin' about." Clay closed the safe and got to his feet.

"I know Clay...I know you killed Piney and I know you tried to kill Tara."

"Your insane." He walked passed her and headed into the kitchen. Gemma didn't miss the fact that he didn't deny any of her accusations.

"You didn't come home till late last night and all of sudden Piney is dead and I heard you taking money out of that safe this morning. It's a bit of a coincidence that hours later somebody goes after Tara." Gemma ranted as she followed Clay. "She would probably be dead if Jax wasn't with her."

"You need to STOP, NOW" Clay shouted as he turned round to face his wife.

"You didn't know that Jax was going to be with her did ya? Or the boys." Clay turned his back on her again he couldn't listen to this shit. He knew he had fucked up he didn't need reminding. "JESUS CHRIST...those babies could have been hurt." Gemma's voice cracked with emotion at the thought.

"ENOUGH." Clay shouted as he turned and kicked one of the kitchen chairs across the room.

"Maybe Jax needs to know that truth." That was it, she had said to fucking much. He stepped towards her but Gemma stepped back and slid her bag off her shoulder as she pulled a gun on him. Clay stopped dead. "You stay away from me you son of a bitch." Gemma dropped her bag to the floor and held the gun firmly in her hands as she pointed it at her husband. "You stay away from my family."

"Or what. You going to kill me Gemma. Huh...like you did the first Husband?"

"You killed John." Gemma snapped back as she shook her head.

"You're not doing this to me Gemma their my family to. I practically raised Jax and Nicole. I'm not going to let you take them away from me. You played me for a chump, and I was. I was no match for that tight pussy and that broken heart. Maybe I should tell them that truth." Gemma paled at the thought, she knew how manipulative Clay could be and she hated the thought of him getting inside Jax and Nicole's heads, hated that he could turn them against her. And with that fear of losing of her children Gemma pulled the trigger firing a shot that just skimmed passed Clay's head lodging in the wall behind him. As soon as she pulled the trigger she knew she had fucked up and when Clay turned back at her from looking at where the bullet that was meant for his head had landed she could see his rage. Next thing she knew he was coming for her and knocking the gun out of her hand.

Her survival instincts kicked in and she punched him face and tried to make a run for it but Clay recovered quicker than she anticipated and he grabbed her sending her flying onto the large dining table. They struggled, each one trying to land a hit, but it was Gemma who came out on top using her freshly manicured nails to scratch his face giving her space to move from underneath him. Rolling across the table she knocked over another chair slowing her down. Seeing him come for her again Gemma screamed for him to stay away from her as she grabbed some vases off the shelf and started throwing them at him.

She ran for the kitchen hoping that she could make it out of the back door but Clay caught up with her and threw her from the door. She went flying into the kitchen counter sending the plates and cups that were on the draining board crashing to the floor along with herself. She tried to get to her feet but Clay was on her before she could manage it. She had never seen him like this, it was as if he couldn't see her, all he could see was red and as she continued to struggle beneath him Clay raised his hand and Gemma screamed as the back of his hand connected with her face.

Clay didn't stop, he threw punch after punch until his arthritic hands couldn't do any more.

* * *

"Hey do you want to say good night to Abel?" Jax looked at Tara but she gave him nothing she just continued to stare up at the ceiling like she had been since she got out of surgery. "Just tell him Mommy's sleepin'. Thank you Neeta." Jax placed his cell back in his pocket and went back to Tara's bedside. "Tell me what I can do for you?"

"Nothing." Tara answered groggily.

"Please...get mad at me Tara, scream at me somethin', anythin'. I know this is all my fault."

"No...It's not Jax. This had to happen." Jax looked at her in utter confusion.

"What are you talkin' about?"

"Fate." She spoke barely above a whisper as she turned to look at him for the first time. "We're supposed to be together right..." Jax nodded. "But you can't leave here."

"I am leaving here. With you." He stated firmly.

"No. The Club won't let you. Gemma, Nicole they won't let you. Charming won't let you." Jax got up from his chair. He hoped that it was just the drugs talking because he hated hearing those words leave her mouth she sounded so broken and it killed him. He came to stand next to her his hand coming to rest just above her head as his fingers ran through her hair.

"Babe your just hurtin' right now. You need to get some sleep."

"The only way I can be with you is if I lose _my _out. I lost that today babe." Jax shook his head. "I have a dead hand." Tears threatened to fall and Tara closed her eyes in an effort to stop them. "No one will want me now." Her voice started wavering.

"Babe come on don't do this..."

"It's okay because now we can be together. You, me, Gemma your cousin, here in beautiful Charming. One big happy family." Tara finally lost her battle and her tears started falling.

"Tara stop." Jax moved from her side as his own tears started to fall. "Don't do this."

"You should leave now."

"I'm sorry."

"I can't see you..anyone...please just leave."

"Tara..." He tried to touch her but Tara started screaming at him.

"GO...GO...GO..." He didn't want to leave her especially in the state she was currently in but he also didn't want to upset her anymore. So he left.

Drying his eyes he walked into the waiting room where he found Nicole stretched out over two chairs as she slept. She looked so peaceful that he didn't want to wake her. He took a seat next to her and found himself just looking at her. He wondered if Tara's words were true. He had been thinking a lot about Nicole or more about leaving her. It worried him, the thought of leaving her behind, but he knew that he had to leave now, he had to get Tara out of this. Nicole would be okay he would make sure of that but he couldn't let his fears of leaving her cause him any more doubt.

"Ah..hey bro." Jax looked up to see Tig, Bobby, Opie, Chibs and Happy walking towards him. Their voices lowering when they saw Nicole asleep. They all stepped away from her as they continued to talk.

"How's Tara?"

"She's okay." Jax said in answer to Opies question. "She's restin'."

"How are you doin'?" Opie knew Jax better than anyone and right now he could tell his brother was hurting.

"I'm a'right. Where's Clay?" Jax directed the last part to Tig.

"He headed home said he would catch up with you later."

"He met with Romeo he said they were going to track down the Lobos who did this." Bobby added, and Jax could hear the distaste in his voice. This was killing Bobby.

"We find Juice?"

"Yeh. Roosevelt took im in fer nother' piss test." Chibs answered.

"Thanks for bein' here boys."

"Come on." Tig pulled Jax into a hug. "Absolutely brother."

"I'm gonna hang, stay with Tara. You guys should head back."

"We'll leave you a couple of prospects. You need anythin?" Bobby asked. Jax turned back to look at Nicole who was still sleeping.

"She needs to go home she's been here all day." Jax turned to Opie. "Will you follow her back?" Opie nodded. "A'right gimme a minute to wake her up." They all came up and gave him a hug before leaving him and Opie. Jax waited till they were alone till he started to talk again.

"Sit with me?" Opie nodded and took a seat opposite Jax.

"So..."

"I've been lying to you Ope. That deal I made with Clay, bout the Cartel, it was to get me out to."

"Wha..what do you mean?"

"I'm leaving Samcro Ope. I was going to jump when Clay retired. But now...I'm out when we get this deal done with the Irish."

"After my 5 year stretch I wanted out to, but you talked me into to staying." Jax could see the disappointment on his best friends face and he felt bad but he had to do this.

"Yeah I did but I realise now that I shouldn't have. I'm sorry. I love you Ope, your my best friend..."

"I need you in this club." Opie spoke through gritted teeth.

"My family needs me more."

"And what about her?" Both of them turned to look at Nicole who was still asleep. "She needs you man."

"I know, but I have to do this." Jax looked back at Opie. "I need you to look out for her." Opie laughed. He couldn't believe any of what he had just heard. He got to his feet and finally looked away from Nicole back to Jax.

"I'll always look out for her, but she ain't my responsibility she yours. This club is your responsibility and your willing to bail on all of that. I know Tara getting hurt it changes things, messes with your head, trust me brother I know that pain. But you can't abandon everything, and I won't help you." With those words Opie left.

Jax knew that telling Opie wasn't going to be easy but he hadn't expected that. Jax ran his hand over his tired face. He couldn't think about any of this anymore. Turning his attention to Nicole he brushed a piece of her hair from her face as he started to slowly nudge her awake.

He watched as she started to stir, her eyes fluttering open.

"Is Tara okay?" Jax smiled down at her. She was sleepy but he loved how the first words out of her mouth were concern for his girl.

"Yeah she's okay, she's restin'." Nicole rubbed her eyes and sat up, stretching her arms above her head. "You should go home."

"No. I want to stay." He smiled at her again.

"There's nothing that you can do here. You should go home get some rest." She went to argue but Jax raised his hand. "No arguments Nic. Go home."

"You sure?"

"Yeah." Jax stood up and offered a hand to Nicole as he helped her from her seat. "How did everything go today?"

"Romeo and his guys are trying to find the Lobos who did this. We should know more in a couple of days." Nicole nodded before leaning on to her tiptoes and kissing his cheek.

"You sure you're going to be okay?

"Yeah. You be careful driving back okay." Jax knew full well that Opie wouldn't be waiting for her.

"I will." Nicole kissed him again and hugged him tightly before making her way out of the waiting room.

* * *

Nicole cut the engine to the truck as she pulled up outside Gemma and Clay's. She rested her head on the steering wheel as she took a deep breath. This day had been a complete shitter of a day and she wished she could just erase it all but she knew that was impossible. Maybe tomorrow would be better, because it couldn't couldn't get any worse. Or so she thought. But as she finally dragged herself out of the truck and towards the house- she headed for the back door as she had forgotten her front door key and there was always a spare under the mat for the back door-she was shocked by what greeted her.

There were smashed plates and cups on the floor and chairs were over turned. On reflex she pulled the 9 mill- Happy had insisted that she keep on her at all times after the night she had spent at his cabin-from her bag and raised it as she cautiously edged deeper into the house.

As she stepped out of the kitchen she saw the glow of a cigarette and could smell the weed. Placing the gun back in her bag she placed it on the table and cautiously made her way over to her Aunt. When her Aunt finally came into view Nicole's breath caught in her throat.

She looked terrible. Her face was covered in bruises and her one cheek was swollen as well as her lip. And as Gemma shifted under her gaze Nicole noticed her one hand fly to her ribs telling her that there was more damage underneath.

"Jesus Gemma..." Nicole knelt in front of her, her hand reaching for her face but Gemma pulled away.

"I'm okay."

"No your not. We need to get you to a hospital."

"No..no..nothings broken." Gemma said as she touched her face winching in pain.

"Gem who did this to you was this the Lobos?" Nicole watched as her Aunt diverted her eyes from hers as she took another drag off her joint. And suddenly it became all to clear to Nicole who had done this.

Nicole had been here herself she knew the signs. The fact that she didn't want to go to a hospital, the fact that she couldn't look at her, and the fact that there wasn't any sons around all those things told Nicole that this wasn't an otusider.

"Clay did this didn't he...Gemma..."

"I can't do this now baby."

"Oh my god..." Nicole got to her feet in temper. She was going to kill him for this, this was not acceptable this wasn't right. He couldn't get away with this. Leaving bruises on her arms was one thing but beating the shit out of his wife, her Aunt, that was not okay.

As soon as Nicole got to her feet Gemma knew what or rather where she was going but that was the last place Gemma wanted Nicole to go. Clay had done this to her and she was afraid of what he would do to her. His threat of revealing that she was the one to blame for JT's death and the fact that he could hurt her scared the shit out of Gemma and she didn't want Nicole anywhere near him. Clay would be handled but not by her. He would be handled by a Son.

"No." Even though her ribs protested Gemma reached out and caught Nicole's hand. "I don't want you going after him. Not tonight." Nicole was torn between her anger and the pleading look on Gemma's face. "Please."

"Okay." Nicole moved back to Gemma and held her hand tightly. "Okay."

* * *

Nicole pulled the door closed taking one last look at her Aunt. She had cleaned her up and finally managed to get her to agree to go to bed. From personal experience Nicole knew that Gemma was not going to be able to sleep tonight, partly because of her injures and partly because every time she'd close her eyes she knew that Gemma would be reliving her attack. So Nicole had slipped her a sleeping pill, she knew that mixed with the weed would send her to sleep and Nicole was right because Gemma was passed out. Which was good.

Nicole understood why Gemma didn't want her going after Clay but Nicole couldn't stop herself this was all to close to home for her and she couldn't let him get away with it.

* * *

Happy lent against the wall of the clubhouse as he blew out the smoke of his cigarette. Today had been a long day and while his brothers were inside unwinding with a couple of sweetbutts and booze Happy found himself outside alone, trying to clear his head. Everything seemed to be going to shit. The club was divided, the Lobos had taken a strike at the Doc and now Clay had stormed into the clubhouse with scratches on his face ignoring all of them. It was all becoming fucked up and that wasn't even including his growing suspicion of Juice.

He wished that the Cartel vote had gone the other way drugs were ruining everything.

He took the last drag of his cigarette quickly followed by a swig of his beer as he flicked away the butt. He was about to head inside and join his brothers when the sound of screeching tyres caught his attention. From the shadows he watched Nicole slam on the brakes to her truck stopping in the middle of the lot and climbing out storming straight towards the Clubhouse. As she got closer he could tell that she was pissed could see it in her eyes. Whatever she was about to go and do was not going to end well. Stepping out from his hiding place he reached out and caught her arm just before she made it inside.

"Don't touch me..." She screamed as Happy pinned her against the wall. "Get off me..." Happy never said anything as he kept her pinned against the wall. "Get off me Hap or I swear to god..."

"What you gonna do kid...way I see it you either tell me what's got you so worked up or we can just stay out here all night cause there's no way I'm lettin' you go inside like this."

"He beat the shit out of her." She tried to keep her voice firm but she failed. She couldn't stop her voice from shaking as her emotions started coming to the surface.

_Shit._ That was Happy's first thought. He didn't need any further explanation from Nicole he knew exactly who she was on about. The scratches on Clay's face, Nicole's upset and rage. Clay had beat the shit out of Gemma. _Fuck._ This was just what the club needed. He looked down at Nicole when he felt her go slack under his hold. She had tears in her eyes but the anger was clearly still there.

"He watched a guy die for doing exactly the same thing to me. How could he do this to her..." She tried to move but Happy wasn't stupid she may have stopped fighting but she wasn't done. She let out a frustrated scream when she realised that he wasn't going to let her go anywhere. "Let me go...I can't let him get away with this...he hurt her..."

"And she's his Old Lady it's their business." He knew she wouldn't like hearing that but it was truth, for him anyway. He couldn't go in there and be all up in Clay's face. What happened between an Old man and his Old Lady was between them he had no right to get involved especially when the couple in question was the President and his wife.

"Your unbelievable...that rule didn't seem to apply when you went after Ryan. None of you could seem to keep your fucking nose out then." It was a pitiful argument but the point was still valid or so she thought but she kind of cowered back when she saw the dark look in Happy's eyes.

Happy hated hearing his name leave her lips and he felt himself push her harder against the wall. She didn't get it, didn't understand what he was trying to say.

"You don't even care do you..." God he wanted to just shake her. She was so wrong.

"You go in there now and kick off Clay is going to lose it. And if he..." For the first time Happy eased his grip on her. "If he lays hands on you I'm gonna have no choice but to get involved and that won't end well for anyone..." Nicole stopped fighting against him and stared up at him. The dark look had gone from his eyes and was replaced with something that Nicole couldn't quite place. "I get your anger Nic I do but this ain't your place. Let Jax deal with this." That was the only solution Happy could think of. This problem wasn't going to go away but it was better that Jax dealt with it rather than her at least it would be a fairer fight.

"Why would he do this Hap..." Her voice was weak and Happy didn't know how to answer her question he didn't know how to reassure her.

"Where are your keys?" Nicole just looked at him blankly, so he tried again. "Keys. I'm gonna take you home." She nodded and handed him the keys that were balled up in her hand. He took the keys and took her elbow leading her over to her truck. She looked out of it as he helped her into passenger side. He really hated seeing her like this.

When they pulled up outside the house he got out the truck and came round the passenger side. She hadn't said a word on the short ride and he was starting to worry, he hadn't seen her like this in a while. And as they walked into the house he understood why she was so worked up. While she went to check on Gemma he took the time to look around and judging by what he saw including the bullet hole in the wall behind him Nicole was right Clay must have really hurt her, and he knew that the state of the place and seeing Gemma all banged probably brought up way too much painful shit for Nicole.

He remembered that day all to clearly as well. He remembered the fear inside him when he saw Nicole knocked out on the floor with that piece of shit on top her, his intentions clear. The scene had shocked him that he fucked up the shot leaving the prick still breathing. He was glad he was the one to finally kill that mother fucker but he would give anything to go back to that day and not fuck up that shot. If he had killed him that day Nicole wouldn't have to go through all that other shit, it would have been over.

His eyes shot up from the destruction on the floor when he heard her come into the kitchen. Her arms were wrapped protectively around herself, she looked so lost.

He stepped over the broken plates and came to stand in front of her. He never said anything and neither did she, they just stared at one another until Happy finally lowered his lips onto hers.

His hand found it's way to the nape of her neck, his fingers tangling in the mass of her light brown hair as he pulled her flush against him. As her hands came to rest on either side of his face Happy wrapped his other arm around her small waist lifting her feet off the ground as he edged them towards the large dining table.

Nicole wrapped her arms around his neck as he sat her on top of the table. It may have been 14 months since she had felt his touch tasted his mouth but Nicole had not forgotten how good it felt. Keeping her mouth on his as their tongues explored one another's she unwrapped her hands from and around his neck and trailed down the front of his shirt. She felt his muscles contract under her touch. Fisting her hand in his shirt she pulled him further between his legs his growing erection pressing against her.

Nicole pouted in disappointment when he pulled his mouth from hers but her disappointment quickly vanished when he his mouth trailed down her neck in open mouth kisses as his hands ran down her body.

"Shit.." She moaned breathlessly as his rough hands edged their way beneath her shirt.

Happy felt his dick get harder as his touched her skin. Her skin was soft supple and his hands seemed to fit perfectly against her every curve, he'd thought about her during his time inside but actually feeling her, feeling her react to his touch was so much better than he ever imagined and he remembered why he had gone back for more.

Continuing his way up her tight body Happy ran his thumbs over the lace that was covering her breasts making her arch into his hands. Wanting to see the tits that felt so fantastic in his hands he pulled her shirt off throwing it across the room as he admired the view in front of him. His dick twitching at the sight of the black lace bra that was making her already incredible tits more fucking incredible and irresistible. His cupped her breast and pulled back the material until her already hard nipple was revealed, he wasted no time in taking her breast in his mouth as he sucked on her nipple.

Her head rolled back on her shoulders her breath catching as his tongue circled her nipple. She ran her hand over his shaved head. Shit he made her feel god but she knew how quickly things were going to move now. She didn't know about him but she had waited for this for far to long, but not here.

"Hap..." She felt the vibration of his moan in her chest but he didn't stop his attack on her breast. "Hap..." Again nothing. Placing both hands on the side of his face she reluctantly pulled his head up. Registering the confusion and anger in his eyes, Nicole kissed him before resting her forehead against his. "Not here...I can't...Not here..."

Happy cleared his throat. He knew exactly why she didn't want to do this here and it fucking pissed him off to know that even though that piece of shit was six feet under he still held some sort of hold over her. He should, he wanted to ignore her and just bend her over the table and fuck her make her forget all about that piece of shit but she didn't need that shit right now. But one day he would make her get over this he would fuck her on every surface in this room until she couldn't even remember that shitheads name.

He brushed his lips against hers as his hands ran up her thighs before he lifted her off the table, her legs wrapping around his waist. Happy had to admit it felt damn good having her wrapped around him.

As soon as he pushed the door shut to her bedroom all hell broke lose.

Nicole fought to undress him as he did the same, their lips landing on any piece of skin they could as their hands explored each others now almost naked bodies.

Happy caught her breast in his mouth again as his hand ran up in the inside of her thigh coming to rest on the material of her black lace panties. Rubbing his hand against the material he could feel her wetness as he looked up at her, he was just in time to see her close her eyes and bite down on her lower lip. He smiled against her skin as he rubbed harder.

"Fuc.." The words died in her mouth as he slid a finger inside her, moving it back and forth before he slid another one inside. "Hap..." As he pumped his fingers in and out of her he started rubbing his thumbing over her clit.

Her mouth was going dry as she tried to gasp for breath. What he was doing was unbelievable right now, and she could feel her orgasm building deep inside her. Grasping at the covers with one hand she used the other to run over his head before running her hand down the side of his face where she pulled his head up. Taking the hint Happy moved up body dropping kisses over her skin before his lips were on hers, his tongue forcing it's way into her mouth. As the kiss deepened his pace got quicker and before she knew it she was cuming.

"Good?" Happy mouthed against her lips. Unable to speak Nicole just nodded, but Happy wasn't done with her yet. And when he felt her hand slide inbetween them reaching for his erection he knew she wasn't done with him.

Returning the favor Nicole wrapped her hand around his length and started gliding her hand up and down. She rolled him onto his back and straddled him as she quickened her pace. Happy let out a low growl. She continued rubbing him until Happy stopped her, bringing her lips back to his.

He could feel himself coming and he wasn't about to spill in her hands.

As he held her head in place kissing her dominantly Nicole could feel herself getting worked up again. Removing one hand from the side of her face she felt it land on her thigh moving up to her ass where he gave it a cheeky squeeze. Nicole giggled into his mouth, her reaction earning her a slap on her butt cheek.

"Kinky..."She whispered pulling her lips from his before returning them to his jaw line where she kissed her way up to his earlobe and back down to his mouth. She felt his fingers slide under the fabric of her panties, the next thing she knew he had ripped them off. "They were my favorite." She told him with a smirk as she pushed herself back from. Both hand resting on his chest.

"I'll buy you a new fucking pair."

"Fair enough." With a shrug of her shoulders she lent forward kissed him quickly on the lips before kissing her way down his tattooed chest. She ran her hand up and down his length again, looking from beneath her ashes straight into his dark eyes. Keeping eye contact Nicole eased him inside of her, gasping as he filled her. She had forgotten how good he felt.

Happy placed his hands on her hips steadying her as she eased him inside her. She was tight so fucking tight that she felt like a vice around him. He watched her bite down on her lip again as she adjusted to him. When she was ready she slowly started to move and Happy could feel her hands on his chest press down harder on him as she started to move quicker.

His fingers gripped he hips harder as she increased the pace. Watching her move above him he realised just how fucking beautiful she was.

Sitting up he wrapped his arm around her waist as his other hand scraped her hair from her face, twisting her hair around his fingers. He stared at her and he felt her slow her pace as she stared back at him. Crashing his lips onto hers he kissed her hard, his arm tightening around her waist. Fuck he wanted her.

Flipping her onto her back Happy started to thrust inside her. The louder she moaned and the more she wriggled beneath him the harder he thrust but it wasn't enough he wanted to get deeper inside. Grabbing her leg he threw it over his shoulder a positioned himself as he drove deeper inside her.

He could feel her walls constricting around him she was close but he was closer, not wanting to leave her unsatisfied his hand reached down between them and he started rubbing her clit.

Nicole dug her nails into his contracting back as she tried to pull him closer. She was close and as he rubbed her harder and thrust deeper she finally let go, his name tumbling from her lips as her whole body shook. Happy smirked and thrust twice more before he unloaded inside her, a throaty curse leaving his mouth as he collapsed on top of her.

Nicole enjoyed the feel of his weight on her. She had missed this, missed him. Liam was good but it seemed that no one could fuck her like Happy could.

Nicole lightly kissed her way from his shoulder to his neck. She smiled against his hot skin when she he growled against neck his tongue licking its way up to her ear. She giggled when he started nibbling on her earlobe.

Happy loved that sound, she sounded so carefree and he liked that. Baring his weight on his forearms his face hovered over hers.

"All good now?" Nicole ran her knuckles over his cheek before leaning up and catching his lips as she kissed him softly.

"Yeah. I'm good." She spoke against his mouth. Happy pressed his lips back to hers. She was like a fucking drug. He growled against her lips before pushing himself from her and lying on his back.

They both lay there in silence as they tried to catch their breath.

Nicole wasn't lying when she said told him she felt better. Happy had managed yet again to make her feel safe, protected like all the bad shit that seemed to be a constant around her at the moment didn't stand a chance against her now, not while he was there and as much as she loved that feeling and wanted to cling to it she knew how this worked. He was going to leave.

Sitting up Nicole went to get off the bed-if he was going to leave she wasn't just going to lay there and watch him go like some pathetic little girl who did know how this shit worked-but as she moved she felt his hand wrap around her wrist. Her head shot over her shoulder but he never said anything instead she just felt him pull her back.

"Get some sleep kid." Nicole nodded and lay back down next to him as he covered them with the sheets. Nicole wasn't sure what he was doing but she wasn't about to question it. Hooking her arm over the sheet she turned on her side and cautiously rested her hand on his chest. She wasn't sure how he would react and was surprised when he snaked an arm around her and pulled her closer to his side. Again she didn't question, she just closed her eyes and enjoyed the closeness.

Happy looked down at her as she drifted off and for the second time in so many days he realised that he was screwed.


	26. Chapter 26

Everything Changes 

Chapter 26

Nicole reached out in search of the man responsible for the smile that was currently on her face but as her hand searched for him she came up empty. Her smile wavered but who was she kidding, she never really expected to find him there she knew what last night was. And just like that she rolled onto her back her hands covering her eyes as all the shit that went down yesterday came flooding back to her, he wasn't there to keep her safe anymore.

Unwillingly Nicole forced herself to get out of bed, even though she could have just pulled the covers over her head and spend the day hiding away but that was not an option. So she got up grabbed some clothes and headed for the shower before she started cleaning up the destruction left from Clay's attack.

Surprisingly it didn't take her long to clear up the mess but it did make her sick to her stomach. Seeing the mess, plates smashed chairs over turned and the memory of Gemma's smashed up face reminded her all too much of Ryan and what had transpired between them in this very house.

She hadn't thought about Ryan for a long time but since last night she couldn't seem to get him out of her head.

Hearing the click of the coffee machine Nicole pushed herself from the counter she had been lent against while her mind went over things she rather it didn't, she poured herself a cup of coffee.

"I'll have one." Nicole jumped causing her to miss her cup and allowing the coffee to spill over the counter.

"Shit." Nicole put the pot down and grabbed a cloth and started cleaning up the spilt coffee. Gemma watched her niece as she flapped around trying to clean up the coffee she had spilt, the coffee she had spilt because her presence had the shit out of her. Gemma sighed, she hated that her shit with Clay was bleeding all over the Nicole.

"Sorry baby." Gemma said as she came up behind Nicole.

"Don't be." Nicole dropped the cloth and turned to face Gemma, giving her a sympathetic smile when she saw her face, that actually looked worse than the night before. Nicole pulled her into a hug although she was careful not to squeeze her to tightly, remembering seeing her Aunt wince in pain as she tried to move. Her ribs obviously bruised or worse. "You okay?"

"I'm fine darlin." Nicole could tell that Gemma didn't want her pity nor did she like the affection Nicole was currently showing her. It reminded Nicole of herself.

"I didn't expect you to be up." Nicole said as she pulled back from Gemma and grabbed another cup.

"Yeah well if you wanted me to sleep longer maybe you should have popped two sleeping pills into my drink rather than one." Nicole smirked as she carried the two mugs of coffee over to the kitchen table Gemma was now sitting at. Even after what she had been through it seemed nothing got passed Gemma.

"I knew there was no other way you were going to sleep. Are you mad?"

"No." Gemma took a sip of her coffee. "Take it that was Happy I heard leaving this morning." _Yeap nothing gets passed the queen. _"You went to go and see Clay didn't you." Gemma asked not giving Nicole enough time to answer the first question. Gemma didn't need her to tell her that Happy was here this morning because Gemma had seen him leaving the house.

"Yes."

"Jesus Nicole I told you not to..."

"Don't worry Hap stopped me before I could get to Clay."

"Well that's one thing I guess. Did you tell him?" Nicole nodded sheepishly. She knew Gemma would hate people knowing her business.

"I'm sorry."

"What did he say?"

"Hap?" Gemma nodded. "He said that it was between you and Clay..." Gemma scoffed she wasn't surprised that a son was sicking up for brother. It was how they worked. "He told me that I should tell Jax, that he should handle this." Nicole made sure she was looking directly at Gemma when she said the next bit. "I think he's right. Jay needs to know about this Gem..." Gemma looked down into her mug of coffee.

Last night she had come to a decision about what she wanted to happen to Clay. Last night they had both crossed so many lines, lines that they couldn't come back from. They had had many fights over the years and yes he many have grabbed her and she may have slapped him but never had he lay hands on her like he had last night. Gemma looked back at Nicole and found herself wondering how she did it, because right now the thought of seeing or being anywhere near Clay scared her and at the same time angered her.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah."

"Why did you stay with Ryan after the first time he hit you?" Nicole froze it seemed like she wasn't the only to be thinking of Ryan. Nicola took a sip of her coffee her eyes dropping from Gemma as she shrugged her shoulders.

"I dunno."

"Your strong Nicole how did you manage to get yourself in that situation?" Nicole just wished that Gemma would let it go, but she didn't think that was going to happen so she was going to try and answer her questions.

"The first time, it was just a slap. I actually kicked him out told him I never wanted to see him again, that we were done. That lasted two weeks." Nicole briefly made eye contact with Gemma and could tell didn't understand why her will only lasted two weeks. "He apologised everyday brought me flowers and chocolates I never thought I would be one of those girls to fall for that shit but I did. I forgave him and stupidly believed him when he promised me that it wouldn't happen again." Nicole took a sip of her coffee. "And it didn't for a while it was 6 months before he hit me again. I can't even explain why I stayed that time but I did and I continued to stay. I think when he realised that a slap kept me in my place he started liking it and by that time I was scared of him, scared of what he'd do to me."

"So why was the last time different, why did you leave that time?"

"Because I caught him fucking some whore in our bed." Nicole shook her head at the memory. "I mean I know the rules of the club all that run bullshit and even though he was knocking the shit out of me he never cheated on me not in Nevada, he never hooked up with any sweetbutts or whores he always came home to me. I know it's sounds stupid but seeing him fucking her in our bed hurt me more than any beating he gave me. I knew I couldn't stay after that."

"That's why he beat you that badly because you were going to leave."

"Yeah, I hadn't threatened him with leaving in a long time. Plus he knew I wasn't bullshitting this time. I think he panicked. He had never beaten me like that before, I think on some level he thought that it would make me stay but I couldn't. The beating I could take in one way it was the cheating that did it for me."

"You still loved him?"

"Yes." Nicole answered honestly.

"Even when he came here to Charming."

"Yes. I tried denying it at first but the longer I was around him the more..." Nicole stopped avoiding her Aunts eyes and finally looked at her. "Even when the person you love hurts you, that love just doesn't disappear but Gem I learnt the hard way that even if you love them it doesn't mean that they won't hurt you again." She reached across the table and squeezed Gemma's hand. "Please don't make my mistakes." Gemma felt the tears burn in the back of her eyes, she squeezed her hand back.

"I won't. Me and Clay..." The words died in Gemma's mouth. She couldn't seem to find the right words to tell her niece that she was going to make sure that Clay was going to be taken care of by none other than a son. Even though Nicole was pissed at Clay for this Gemma wasn't sure how Nicole would react to knowing that she was planning his death. "I'm not taking him back Nic."

"So me telling Jay, your okay with that?" Gemma let go of her hand and lent back in her chair.

"Not like I can't hide this from him." Nicole was glad to hear that. Just as she was about to open her mouth and tell her that there was a knock on the door. Gemma eyes shot to the door before going back to Nicole who was getting to her feet.

"If it's a son I don't want to see them, not yet."

"It's probably Unser." Nicole said as she continued to answer the door.

"You called Unser?"

"You need a friend Gemma." Nicole opened the back door letting Unser inside. "Hey."

"Hey darlin' so what's the emergency you sounded pret..." Unsers words died in his mouth when he finally noticed Gemma. "Jesus what the hell happened."

"I'm going to leave you two to it." Nicole grabbed her bag off the counter. She walked over to Gemma and kissed the top of her head. She spared one last look at Unser before she left.

Unser waited till the door closed behind Nicole before he moved closer to Gemma to continue his questioning.

"Was this Clay?" Gemma gave a slight nod of her head. "God damn him." Unser took a seat at the table with her. He had just spent most of the night covering Clay's back pointing Piney's murder on the Lobos and all the time he was doing that Clay was beating the shit out of Gemma. It made him sick, it made him angry. He couldn't cover this up Clay had to pay for this, but at the same time he knew that this wasn't his decision. "What do you need sweetheart, what do you want me to do help you here?"

"There's nothing else to do. Nicole knows and she's on her way to the hospital to tell Jackson. Clay can't be saved." Finally. Unser had been waiting to hear that from Gemma for a long time.

"Okay, I'll point Piney's murder at him. We'll put him away."

"No he's not going down...by law...he's going to die at the hands of a son."

* * *

Nicole made her way down the corridor towards the waiting room where she knew Jax would be, but he wasn't instead the only person in there was Kozik.

"Nicky, you shouldn't have." Nicole smiled as Kozik walked up to her.

"There for Tara." Nicole said referring to the boutique of flowers she was holding.

"You're breaking my heart..." Kozik said mockingly as he placed his hand over his heart. Nicole shook her as she laughed at him. She was glad that they were friends again because she wasn't sure that she would be doing so well without him. And as if on cue he reminded her why. "How you doin' today?" Well that was a loaded question she knew he was referring to what happened yesterday with the letter and everything but he didn't know about Clay and Gemma and he didn't know that she was there to break that news to Jax. So no she wasn't doing okay but knowing that he wasn't asking her about that she told him the truth that she was okay because after everything Liam and that stupid letter was the last thing she was thinking about.

"Yeah I'm good. Where's Jay?"

"He's in with Tara."

"Okay. " Nicole watched as Koziks eyes left her and drifted over her shoulder. Sparing a look herself to see what had caught his attention Nicole was a little caught off guard to see Happy standing there. Nicole quickly turned away and looked back at Kozik who's eyes now seemed to be shifting from her to Happy.

"Uh..I'm just...yeah.." Kozik smiled down at Nicole before leaving the two alone. He could tell when he wasn't wanted.

Nicole felt like killing Kozik talk about making an awkward situation more awkward. Taking a deep breath Nicole turned on her feet to face Happy.

"Hey." She spoke feebly as Happy moved closer towards her.

"Sorry bout this mornin', had club business to..."

"It's fine I figured as much." Happy nodded. He forgot how club she was. No questions, no trying to make him feel guilty for leaving her to wake up alone, nothing and strangely Happy wasn't sure if he liked the distance she was showing him right.

"How's Gemma?"

"You know Gemma take more than a beating to knock her down."

"And you?" Nicole took the chance to look up at him and was surprised to find he'd closed the gap even more.

"I'm good."

"Liar." Nicole swallowed hard as he stepped even closer, there was barely any space between them now. "What?" Nicole wondered whether she should tell him or not but then she thought what the hell. He asked.

"Gem asked me bout why I stayed with Ryan, just brought up some bad shit. Nothing I can't handle though." Happy's jaw flexed the same way it had last night when she told him she couldn't fuck him on the kitchen table. He hated Ryan and she knew he hated hearing her talk about him more. "Sorry..."

"It's a'ight."

"I better go see Jay..."

"You tellin' him?"

"Yeah."

"Good." Nicole gave him a tight lip smilied and turned to leave but Happy's arm snaked around her waist pulling her back to him. As her head turned back to face him his lips caught hers in the briefest of kisses. "Be careful a'right."

"You to."

* * *

"I'm sorry about yesterday I kind of lost it." Tara apologised as Jax came to take a seat on the edge of her bed.

"You have nothing to apologise for babe."

"I just don't know what to do now Jax."

"We stick to the plan..." Tara smiled but there was nothing behind it.

"There is no plan. No Hospital is going to want me now."

"We will figure that out your still a doctor and a good one we will find a way Tara I promise you that. Nothings changed for me I am still getting out of Samcro. And I am going to get us out of Charming."

"Okay." Jax knew that she didn't believe a word of what he was saying and he wondered just how much of what she had said last night was the truth. Seeing her like this so broken killed him inside and he would do anything to get back the woman he loved. The woman who only yesterday he had been lying in the park with, the woman who's smile was genuine, the woman who believed that he could do this.

"I need you to believe me babe, I need to believe that I can do this."

"I do...I really do but at the same time I really believe tha..." Tara's words died in her throat as they were interrupted by a knocking on the door. Jax ran his thumb over her cheek and smilied at her before he got up and went to answer the door.

"Hey."

"Hey she awake?"

"Yeah." Jax stepped back and opened the door further allowing Nicole to step inside.

"Hey T."

"Nicole."

"I thought these might brighten up the your room a little bit." Tara looked at the flowers briefly. They were beautiful but she could barely muster up a smile. "I'll just put them over here."

Nicole placed the flowers on the table near her bed. Nicole put Tara's offish attitude down to the drugs and the trauma that she had been through. Nicole knew the damage to her hand could be very damaging to her career so Nicole understood why she was pissed, but when she turned to look at Jax she got a feeling that the attitude she was getting wasn't because of that. Nicole tried to ignore it and took a seat on the edge of the bed.

"So how are you feeling?" Tara laughed at Nicole's question. It was stupid how the hell did she think she was feeling.

"Fantastic." Tara knew that her tone was sarcastic but she couldn't help it. She thought she could do this but right now as she looked at Nicole, watched how she kept eyeing Jax she felt angry. She remembered everything she had said to Jax last night and she meant every word even if she wouldn't tell Jax. Nicole and Gemma were the road blocks. Tara knew that she would never get clear of Charming while those two still had their claws in Jax. They needed to realise that Jax was hers not theirs.

Jax could feel the tension building in the room and he had no idea what to do. It was clear that Tara didn't want Nicole here and she was making it damn right obvious right now and couldn't help but feel bad for his cousin. Jax could handle Tara's rage and upset but Nicole shouldn't have to. But he was, if he defended Nicole then he would be proving Tara right and she was in too much of a vulnerable state for that. No he's only option was to let this go down however it was going to go and then pull Nicole aside and explain. He just hoped his cousin kept her cool.

"They say how long you've stay in here."

"No." _Okay. _Nicole took a deep breath, she couldn't shout at her even if she was being a complete fucking bitch. She just had to suck it up she was hurting Nicole had to make a little leeway for that. Although she wasn't sure how long she could hold her tongue.

"Well Abel and Thomas are being spoilt rotten so you haven't got to worry about that." Tara looked over at Jax completely ignoring Nicole. That was it she was done. Nicole stood from the bed and turned to Jax.

"Can I talk to you?" Nicole asked from where she stood at the end of the bed. She watched as Jax looked away from her to Tara. Nicole tried to hide her annoyance.

"Can we do it later?" Jax asked as he looked back at her.

"No." Again Jax turned his attention to Tara. Nicole couldn't believe it.

"Go." Nicole turned to look at Tara. She was really starting to piss her off she knew she was angry but this was just taking the piss. Jax stepped forward and leaned down to press a kiss onto her forehead.

"Look I know she was a little off..." Jax tried to explain when they reached the hall, but Nicole cut him off.

"Yeah she was out of line but I get it. Plus we have bigger problems."

"What?"

"You need to go and see your mother." Nicole watched the confusion take over Jax's expression and she hated that she had to tell him this but someone had to and it was defiantly better coming from her.

"Nic's what is it..." Jax could see the glisten of tears in his cousins eyes and it was starting to freak him out.

"Clay beat the shit out of her last night."

"WHAT?"

"She didn't tell me why so I don't know all the details..."

"Where is he?" His chest was heaving and Nicole honestly thought that if she told him where Clay was right now that Jax would kill him.

"I don't know." Jax couldn't believe what he was hearing. He wanted to kill him. "But he can wait. Jay you really need to go and see Gemma she's at the house." He looked down at his cousin. She was right Clay could wait, he would be seeing him at the gun delivery in a couple of hours anyway first he had to deal with Gemma. He had to check she was okay.

"Okay..okay..." Jax ran a hand over his beard. "You okay?" He finally asked realising that she must have been the one who found her. Nicole shook her head.

"It was horrible Jay...the house it was..." Jax heard her voice crack and immediately he pulled her into a hug, kissing the top of her head. Seeing what she had had probably opened up old wounds. Now he felt even worse for letting Tara treat her like that.

"It's a'right...I'm gonna handle this Nic I promise." Nicole pulled back so she could look at him.

"I know. I'll be in the waiting room, I'll let you say goodbye." Nicole used the sleeve of her black top to wipe the tears that had escaped. "Don't think she really wants to see me."

"You know she didn't mean it..."

"Yeah I know."

* * *

Gemma heard the motorbike pull up in the driveway. This was it. She took the last drag of her joint and tried to compose herself. Nicole was the first to enter but as soon as she moved to the side Gemma felt her heart sink. Jax looked at her with wide eyes and she could see the sadness lingering behind them. Gemma felt her tears form as he stepped closer and carefully held her face in his hands as he looked over her injures. When her eyes met his again the sadness that she had seen had now turned to anger.

"I'll give you two a minute." Nicole spoke as she started making her way to her room.

"What happened?" Jax demanded as he took a seat next to her.

"It's been building up. Shit with the drugs and the Cartel. I crossed the line."

"This is more than crossing a line Mom. I can't let this slide." Gemma reached out and touched his arm.

"No. I'm going to handle this Jackson." Jax shook his head, taking deep breaths as he tried to calm himself. "Please you've got to let me settle it." He tried to process what she was saying to him. He couldn't just let this go. And when he looked at her face he knew that he was partly to blame for this.

"I'm sorry."

"No..honey this isn't your fault."

"I thought we could pull this off. Cash out. But I was an idiot. I am as delusional as he is." Gemma tightened her grip on his arm in a comforting gesture. It broke her heart to see her son like this.

"No, you are not like him. You are a better man." Gemma looked at her son. The sadness in his eyes was back and while she had him like this Gemma had to know something. "We're you planning on leaving Charming." Jax rolled his head on his shoulders he really didn't want to go down this road. "I can't take any more lies Jackson." He closed his eyes before looking back at her. Seeing her so vulnerable he knew he owned her the truth.

"Yeah."

"Does Clay know?"

"Yeah."

"Nicole?" Jax shook his head.

"Baby..."

"Don't take this to Tara Mom. Please."

"I won't."

"Us leaving it's about my sons."

"It always is." Gemma moved her hand from his arms and cupped his face. Her tears threatening to fall. Jax couldn't take it anymore it was breaking his heart to see her like this and to know that his news of leaving was just adding to her hurt. He took hold of her hand that was resting on his face and brought it to his lips.

"I love you.." His voice was barely audible but Gemma heard him loud and clear.

"I love you to Jackson." He got up from the table and kissed her on the top of her head before making his way down the hall to Nicole's room.

He stood in the doorway for a moment just watching his cousin as she hung out the window smoking. Today was the first time since deciding to leave that it hit him what he would be leaving behind and what situation he would be leaving them in. Everything was fucked up right now and even if they got clear of this Cartel deal Jax wasn't sure that would be the end of it, and now this thing with Clay it worried him. Before he at least knew that Clay was going to be around to look after his Mother and Nicole but now Clay was a threat. He knew that after this, things were going to change. There was a good chance-he hoped- that this was the end of the road for Clay and Gemma and he knew for damn sure that Nicole was never going to forgive him for what he had done. But then he thought about Tara and his boys. He didn't want him and Tara to end up like Clay and Gemma, not that he would ever raise a hand to her. He just didn't want to end up as the devious couple they had become and he didn't want his boys to end up like him and Nicole. He wanted his boys to have a proper childhood not one where they were taught how to shoot at the age of 12. He had to go but he would make sure they were looked after before he went.

"Hey." Nicole turned round. She had a sympathetic look on her face. She stubbed out her cigarette but didn't attempt to move towards him.

"She okay?" Jax shook his head. Realising that she wasn't going to make the move Jax pushed himself from the door and walked over to her.

"No. But she will be. She doesn't want me to do anything." Nicole shrugged. She understood that. When Ryan had come to Charming she tried protecting him even when Happy and Jax started putting the pieces together she lied to them and she couldn't even explain why. So she wasn't surprised Gemma was doing the same thing.

"She's not ready yet. But she will be. Gem's strong she won't go back to him."

"This must be hard for you."

"I'm okay."

"Look I want you to stay away from Clay."

"Trust me he's the last person I want to see right now. And even if I do it won't be pleasant..."

"No. You see him you walk away Nic." He hooked his finger under her chin tilting her head back so she would look at him. "Promise me that your stay away." Nicole couldn't do that, she knew she wouldn't be able to stop herself if she saw Clay.

"Jay I'm a big girl I can handle myself."

"Stay away Nic. I ain't joking. Clay's dangerous. Just look at Gemma's face."

"Okay fine I'll stay away." Jax dropped a kiss on to her head and started backing out the room. "Jay."

"Yeah..." He stopped just before reaching the door.

"What are you going to do?" She knew that he wasn't going to listen Gemma. There was no way Jax was just going to let this drop.

"Going to remind him that this is my family."

* * *

When Jax walked into the Warehouse everyone was already there. He did the rounds and shook hands and exchanged hugs with his brothers. But when he was done he turned his full attention to Clay.

"Gimme me a minute." It wasn't a request and Clay knew it, and he knew what this was about which is why he didn't argue instead he followed Jax out of the Warehouse. Jax was seething he could see it in the way his shoulders were set and the heavy breaths he was taking. He knew this would be coming.

"What is it?"

"I just saw my Mom."

"And?"

"What do you think? She wouldn't tell me what happened, so I'm asking you."

"That's between me and my Old Lady."

"No you don't get off that easily. You beat the shit out of my Mother." Jax spat through gritted teeth as he stepped closer into Clay's personal space.

"You want to pull of this exit strategy of yours you better stop focusing on my domestic life and start focusing on the issue at hand." Jax stepped back. He was pissed but at the same time Clay was right and he hated that. "Now...I spoke to Romeo he's got info on the Lobos."

"They find the guys who jumped Tara?"

"I'm not sure. But I need your head in this game on all fronts." This time Clay stepped into Jax's personal space. "You understand?"

"Oh I'm focused. And this ain't finished. I want you to stay away from my Mother and Nicole."

"You don't get to make those decisions. She's my wife and my niece." Clay spat.

"You touch them I don't give a shit bout all this I will kill you."

"Don't go making threats you can't keep Son." Clay smirked before turning his back on Jax and walking back to the Warehouse.

"Everything cool?" Bobby asked as Clay re-entered the Warehouse.

"Yeah. Let's check the merchandise." Bobby looked back at Jax who had just strolled inside. The look on his face told Bobby a different story. Whatever it was between the two of them it was defiantly not okay.

"The Irish don't want anyone touching this till their out here." Kozik informed Clay as he and the others started removing the lids to the boxes.

"Understood." Clay looked around at the guns as Kozik started listing what they had.

"We've got a long range sniper riffle, a 50 caliber machine gun and a rocket pellet grenade launcher."

"Damn..I've only seen guns like this in my war games." Juice chimed in as he looked over the guns. "This is Call of Duty shit."

Jax just watched on from the sidelines as his brothers discussed the guns. He could see the excitement in Clay's eyes. He was pissed that he had let himself get in so deep with him. They man had just beat the shit out of his Mom and he couldn't even do shit about it because Clay held all the cards. He had fucked up and now it wasn't only him that was going to pay the price it looked like others were to.


	27. Chapter 27

Hey all my lovely readers thanks for all the reviews and adds. Love you all. x

Everything Changes

Chapter 27

Nicole wasn't sure of taking Gemma to the hospital with her was a good idea in fact she knew it wasn't. Tara had been a complete bitch with her earlier and Nicole could only imagine what she would be like with Gemma especially when she saw her face, but Gemma was insistent and Nicole knew that when Gemma got something in her head there was no point arguing with her. It was impossible. So Nicole relented, and they were currently walking down the hallway towards Tara's room when they saw her being wheeled down the hall by several doctors.

"Oh shit." Gemma muttered as she noticed the blood seeping from Tara's cast.

"What happened?" Nicole asked one of the doctors.

"She smashed her cast. We have to take her back into surgery." Nicole looked back at Gemma but Gemma wasn't looking at her and she was already moving towards Phil who had been posted outside Tara's door.

"I don't know what happened I swear..." That was all Nicole heard before she slipped inside Tara's room. Her flowers along with another boutique were smashed all over the floor. Tara had obviously taken her anger out on the flowers but still Nicole didn't understand why but then she caught sight of the note on the floor and when she bent down to pick it up she couldn't believe what name she was reading.

"Fuck."

"Phil said a woman came with flowers." Nicole slipped the card into her back pocket and got to her feet to face Gemma. "Is there a note or anything?"

"Nothing. Guess we'll just have to wait till Tara comes around."

"That stupid bitch."

"Gemma..."

"No this is going to kill Jax. He doesn't need this shit."

"Look there's nothing we can do here maybe we should just go home."

"No. You go I'm going to wait till she's out of surgery." This was good this gave Nicole a little time to sort out this mess.

"Al'right I'll see you later." Nicole kissed her Aunty on the cheek and left. Pulling out her cell as she walked outside .

* * *

Nicole tried to wait patiently but she was finding it incredibly difficult. She couldn't believe that she had come here, that she had gone to see Tara of all people. Nicole had no idea what her game was but she was going to find out.

"Can I get you another one sweetheart." Nicole looked up at the waitress. She had been sat in the dinner for over 30 minutes with the same cup of coffee and Nicole figured that the waitress was hoping she would move on so that she could get another table in, one that would probably order more than a coffee and leave her a better tip. But Nicole wasn't going to leave until she had spoken to her. So Nicole shook her head and the waitress- with a roll of her eyes- disappeared back behind the counter. When Nicole looked away from the pissed off waitress she saw the person she had been waiting for walking over to her.

"What the hell are you playing at Wendy?" Nicole snapped as soon as Wendy slid into the booth across from her.

"Well that's a nice welcome. Where's the hello, how are you..."

"She smashed her cast Wendy, what the hell did you say to her?" Nicole was surprised to see actual concern in Wendy's eyes.

"I'm sorry. I never meant for that to happen I didn't mean to upset her."

"What did you say to her Wendy..." Suddenly it clicked. "You asked to see Abel didn't you?"

"I told you all I want to do is just to get to know him. I know I gave up the right to raise him but he is my sons Nic, he deserves to know who I am. And I deserve to know him."

"Wendy I told you before that won't happen. Jax or Gemma for that matter won't allow it."

"Maybe before they wouldn't but things are different now. Now I have you." Nicole lent back in the booth. She couldn't believe that Wendy was going to do this.

"You can't..."

"Can I get you anything sweetie?"

"NO." Nicole bit at the waitress without even looking at her. Nicole could feel the death stare the waitress giving her but she didn't care. When she heard her walkaway Nicole lent back across the table. "You can't use that against me."

"Nic your getting me all wrong. I'm not trying to blackmail you. They won't believe me when I say that I'm sober that I've changed, but you can back me up you can tell them not only am I sober but that I helped you."

"No I can't..." Nicole straightened up and went to grab her bag but before she could slide out of the booth Wendy caught her arm stopping her from moving.

"You haven't told them have you..." Nicole never answered. "Jesus Nicole..." Nicole found herself sitting back down.

"I can't tell them."

"Your afraid that they'll cut you out disown you, like they did to me?"

"Yes." Nicole had never voiced that fear till now, and she couldn't believe that she was voicing it to Wendy of all people.

Wendy hadn't come here to blackmail Nicole it hadn't even entered her head but seeing the princess looking so scared, scared about how her family would react if they found out her dirty little secret Wendy couldn't help but see it as an opportunity.

"Look I won't say anything but only if you help me."

"I thought you weren't here to blackmail me."

"Well I changed my mind. I want my Son Nicole and all I'm asking for is you to have my back. This doesn't have to get ugly."

"Okay."

"Really?"

"It doesn't really seem like I have much of a choice does it."

"I promise you I won't let you down Nic."

"You better not. Come on I'll walk you to your car." Nicole pulled out a couple dollar bills onto the table as she slid out of the booth.

Nicole hung back allowing Wendy to get ahead as she walked to her car. If there was one thing Nicole hated it was being blackmailed especially by someone like Wendy. She may think their the same after what they had been through but they weren't Nicole would never harm a child's life like she had. As Wendy went to place the key in her car door Nicole saw her opening. Pulling the 9 from her bag she dug into Wendy's ribs as she used her other arm to pin her against the car.

"What the hell..."

"Shut up. It's your turn to listen now. I will help you Wendy but we are doing this on my terms not yours. I will tell you when the time is right not the other way around and as for threatening me. I don't think so. You even think of breathing a word of what you know to anyone involved in Samcro I will crush any chance you have of seeing Abel. Do you understand?"

"Yes."

"Good." Nicole removed the gun from her ribs and placed it back in her bag before releasing her hold on Wendy. Wendy arched her back as she turned round to face Nicole.

"I forgot just how much like Gemma you could be."

"Yeah well maybe you should remember that."

"So your really going to help me, because I swear to god I will get a lawyer and I will make this shit loud."

"I can't promise you anything but I'll try. Although it won't be anytime soon. There's a lot of shit going on right with the club."

"Isn't there always." Nicole smirked.

"Yeah."

"Thank you."

"Just stay away. No contact Wendy not with Jax or Tara, that's part of the deal."

Nicole climbed into her truck as Wendy pulled out of the parking lot of the diner. Her hands were shaking. Everything was already turning to shit and now Nicole had to deal with Wendy. Nicole remembered how she had actually been so grateful to her for helping her, actually started seeing her as friend like she first had when Jax started hooking up with her but now Nicole's stupidity of allowing Wendy into her life again had come back to bite her on the ass big style. She rested her head on the steering wheel. She was screwed. Even after the little threat she had just made Nicole didn't believe for one second that it would stop Wendy from doing whatever it was she had to do to get Abel back in he life, even telling the whole club her secrets. Nicole squeezed her eyes shut at the thought.

Thinking about how she screwed up Nicole heard the faint vibrate of her cell. _Great. _Lifting her head from the steering wheel she slid her still shaking hand inside her bag. Pulling out her cell she just missed the call, and she noticed it wasn't the only call she had missed. She had 8 missed calls from Tig. Frowning she flicked through her address book and pressed the call button and waited for him to answer.

"Hey, I've just got your call's..."

_"You need to get back to the clubhouse doll."_

"Why what's wrong?"

"_Just get here as soon as can." _

"Tig...Tigger..." Nothing he was gone he had hung up on her leaving her with nothing more than a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach.

* * *

Jax took another hit from the joint that was being passed around his brothers. He dreaded tomorrow because it seemed that everyday seemed to be worse than the day before. He thought finding out about Gemma and Clay was going to be the worst of his problems today but that wasn't the truth.

After checking over the Irish Kings merchandise Clay and Jax went to meet with Romeo, to get the intel they had on the guys that had attacked Tara. They had already silenced two of them but Jax put his foot down saying that he wanted to be there for the killing of the third guy, they agreed although they did seem a little reluctant.

When they took this information back to Church Jax had told the guys that this was on him, that going after these Lobos was about his revenge for Tara but in true brotherhood style everyone in the room told him that they were backing him 100% and they were not going to let him go after them alone. He was appreciative at the show of support from his brothers.

The plan was meant to be simple. Gallindo were going to back them up and they were going to go in and wipe out the Lobos but it didn't end up being that easy in fact it tuned out to be a fucking disaster and right now his bother was paying for it, maybe with his life.

The mood was somber and when Jax looked up to see Chibs walking into the bar shaking his head Jax closed his eyes as he ran his hand over his face before looking at Clay. He wanted to blame him for this but Jax knew he was just as responsible he had pushed for this cartel deal as much as Clay had.

He should be in the hospital but again his loyalty to the club came first and he refused to go knowing that going in with that kind of gun shot wound would bring unwanted eyes onto the club and with Tara in hospital it was left to Chibs to try and patch him up but his medical training was limited and Koziks injury by the looks of it was out of Chibs' league.

They were going to lose a brother today.

"He wants ta speak da ya." Jax looked up thinking Chibs was talking to him but realised that his words were directed at Happy.

* * *

Nicole got to the clubhouse as quickly as she could. She had done nothing on the drive over but go over and over her very brief conversation with Tig. It didn't sound good and the more she thought about it the more her mind started coming up with terrible things, but even that didn't prepare her for what she was hear.

"Hey." Nicole watched as every son in the bar turned to face her. Straight away she knew that she was right something was wrong. "What is it?" Her eyes darted from one son to another hoping that one of them would give her an answer but they all seemed to be looking at one another trying to decided who was going to be the one to break the bad news, what ever it was. When she watched Jax rise from his seat she gathered he was going to be the one.

"Kozik got shot today."

"What?"

"We went after the Lobos that attacked Tara it got messy and..."

"How bad is it?" Jax never answered her and she took that as a bad sign. She took a deep breath and raked one hand through her hair. "Where is he?"

"In his dorm?"

"Can I see him?" Jax nodded as he reached out and rubbed his hand up and down her arm. Nicole started to walk around him but stopped and turned back to face her cousin. "Um..has Gemma called you?"

"I had a missed call but haven't had a chance to call her back, why?" Nicole closed the gap between them again. "Tara smashed her cast they had to take her back into surgery." Jax blew out a breath, this was all he needed.

"Jesus." He looked over Nicole's shoulder at his brothers his eyes locking with Opie's who was now on his feet walking towards the two.

"Go brother I've got her." Nicole looked up at Opie and then at Jax it was clear to her that she was obviously missing something but she decided to leave it alone. She had learnt a long time ago that some times it was best to keep out of some of their shit.

"Thanks man." Jax could see Nicole looking between himself and Opie and he knew she wasn't going to get it but Jax did, Jax knew that Opie was agreeing to Jax's request from last night. He didn't just have Nicole now he had her for life and always would. He nodded his appreciation before returning his eyes to Nicole. "I'll be back later okay." Nicole nodded and Jax placed a kiss against her temple. As Nicole watched her cousin leave she felt a hand on her shoulder. Looking up at Opie she turned around and he pulled her into a hug.

Nicole finally pulled herself away from him and stepped around him. She kept her eyes to the ground as she headed towards the hall, she just couldn't look at them because she knew if she did she would burst into tears. She almost made it to his dorm until someone stepped in front of her. When Nicole looked up she had to physically stop herself from taking a step back because she wasn't about to show him that he bothered her.

"I can't do this right now." She spoke firmly making sure that she looked him square in the eyes. To her surprise Clay nodded and stepped aside letting her pass.

Not missing a beat Nicole continued on her way to Kozik's dorm. Taking a deep breath she eased open the door. She froze on the spot. He was so pale and he looked so week. He was laid out on the bed a bandage wrapped around his chest. It was covered in blood and Nicole felt her stomach turn.

"You gonna just stand there?" Her eyes shot to his. He was smiling at her but Nicole could see that he was struggling. "Don't you dare cry on me Nicky I ain't having the last memory of you to be you crying." She winced at his words.

"Don't say that."

"C'mere." Nicole hesitated but forced her feet to move. The man was dying the least she could do was to do as he asked. As she reached the bed Kozik reached for her hand, again she saw his face twitch in pain, his hand moving to his chest. Nicole took a seat next to him on the bed as she reached for his other hand, clasping it tight on hers. "Hey I told you no cryin' darlin'."

"I'm sorry." She sniffed back her tears but it didn't help. More tears started falling and she knew she wouldn't be able to stop them now. As if realising this Kozik used his free hand to pull her face down to his. "Sshhh...It's gonna be a'right..." Nicole could feel his breaths becoming shorter and she knew he didn't have long left. Pulling back her head she let go of his hand and brought it up to his face her thumb stroking stroking his cheek. She watched that famous smile grace his face again. God she was going to miss that smile.

"I shuda mad you my Old lady when I had the chance..."

"You wouldn't want me as an Old Lady..."

"Yeah I would. Your a special girl Nicky." Kozik lent into her hand that was resting against his cheek. His own hand coming up to cover hers.

"Don't leave me." She didn't mean to stay it but she couldn't stop herself. He had been like her wall lately and she didn't like to think about life without him.

Kozik looked up her. He could see that this was killing her and he hated to think that his death could cause her to fall. He loved this girl and even though he knew he was on his way out he wasn't going to leave her to deal with everything on her own, he knew she's be too stubborn to ask anyone else for help.

"Don't worry Darlin' you'll be a'right." He kissed her palm, giving her hand a quick squeeze. He watched the tears stream down her face and he wished he could stop her hurting.

"I'm sorry..."

"Hey it's part of the li..." Kozik stopped talking and started coughing. Nicole went to grab the bottle of water off the night stand but Kozik shook his head. She replaced the bottle back on the table and when she turned back to him she saw him staring at his hands, following his line of sight Nicole's breath hitched when she saw the blood.

"Oh my god..." She reached for the damp towel next to to the water and desperately started wiping his mouth and hands.

"Well this is really it..." Nicole shook her head not wanting to believe it, but she knew it was the truth. "I love you girl...and I don't re..." His breathing was becoming even shorter.

"Shhh..you don't have to say anything...just save your strength okay..."

"Nah got say it...I don't...I don't regret a thing..wh..what..happ..."

"I don't either." Kozik gave her another smile and Nicole lent forward and pressed her lips against his. She felt him fighting for breaths. Pulling her lips from his but keeping her forehead pressed to his Nicole closed her eyes and held his hand tightly as he took his last breath. Silent tears fell and Nicole held his hand tighter silently hoping that he would squeeze her hand back but he didn't. Lifiting her head she ran her fingers over his eyes as she couldn't bare to see them so lifeless.

Stepping out of his room Nicole closed the door carefully behind her. Leaning her head against the door she braced her for what she was about to do. She had to go out there and tell his brothers that he was dead. Taking a couple of deep breaths she was about to make her way to the bar when she heard a door shutting down the hall. Turning her head she saw Happy standing just outside his room. When he looked at her Nicole felt every emotion she had tried her hardest to push down- so she could do what she had to do and go out there and tell them that Kozik was dead- bubble back up to the surface. Her hands shot up to cover her face as her tears fell again. She hated that she was breaking down in front of him like this but she couldn't help it.

Seeing her breaking Happy couldn't stop himself from going to her. He knew that things had been hard for her but up until half an hour ago he didn't realise exactly how bad things were. Standing in front of her he pulled her to him as he wrapped his arms tightly around her.

"He's gone..."


	28. Chapter 28

Hey, as always thank you soooooooooo much for the reviews and adds. I just want to apologise, work is slammed at the moment as most of my staff have been hit with the flu so lost of long hours for me so there may be some spelling/grammar mistakes in this. I have given it a once over but I was so tired I was kind of seeing double. Hopefully it makes sense and hopefully i'll be able to update soon as I hate leaving all you lovely readers hanging. Enjoy xx

Everything Changes

Chapter Twenty Eight 

Nicole sat on the roof of the clubhouse. She felt completely numb. When she had felt strong enough to pull herself from Happy's arms he told her he would deal with everything and she was grateful for that because she didn't think she could handle telling everyone that Kozik was gone. It would make it to real.

Getting to her feet she looked down over the lot of the clubhouse, it was so quiet. The garage had been closed early and all the sons were inside organising Kozik's memorial that was going to take place tomorrow morning. Heading down the ladder she intended to finally go back inside and try and help them with the planning, it was the least she could do but as her feet landed on the concrete she heard the rumble of a bike pulling into the lot. At first she thought that it might be Jax but it wasn't it was Juice.

Nicole didn't even register what she was doing but before she knew it she was standing in front of Juice and her hands were hitting his chest full force as she pushed him back sending him stumbling back but Nicole didn't give him time to recover as she pushed him again. This was the first chance she had been alone with Juice since her little talk with Roosevelt and every bit of anger she had felt when she finally realised he was working with the police was now rising to the surface plus add in the shit day she'd had with Wendy and Kozik Nicole was beyond furious. Balling her hands into fists she started pounding on his chest.

Shocked, Juice grabbed her wrists and turned her around so that her back was pressed against his chest as he restrained her. He thought this was about Kozik that this was part of her grief but when she spoke Juice felt his whole world turn upside down. He knew that she was starting to put two and two together but hearing the words, hearing the question caught him completely off guard. "_Your working with him. Your working with Roosevelt aren't you?" _He never answered her instead his eyes shot around the lot before resting on the clubhouse doors where he knew the majority of his brothers were. Panicking he lifted her off her feet and started carrying her towards the garage office but Nicole started fighting against him and the heel of her boot caught him in the leg. He didn't allow himself to give into the shooting pain though instead he tightened his grip and was glad when he made it to the office. He turned around placing her inside first before following her inside and closing the door behind him.

"GET OFF ME...GET OFF..." Nicole screamed as she continued to fight in his arms.

"Just calm down. You've got to calm down Nic." Nicole knew that he wasn't going to let her go till she did so she stopped fighting and nodded her head. Juice kept hold of her for a second longer waiting to make sure that she really was going to calm down before he let her go.

As soon as his arms unraveled from around her she put some distance between them. She kept her back to him as she wiped away her tears. When she looked at him she wanted to be strong, she wanted him to know that he wasn't dealing with some stupid emotional girl who didn't know what she was on about. Because she did or least she knew enough.

"Nic.." Nicole turned to face him at the sound of her name leaving his lips.

"NO..no.." Juice backed away from her and took a seat on the edge of the office desk. "I'm only going to ask you this once and if you still have respect for me and this club you won't lie." Juice nodded his eyes leaving hers and landing on his boots. "Are you a rat?" As soon as the words spilled from her lips Nicole wanted him to shout at her, scream at her even, tell her that she was wrong that he would never betray his club like that, god she would even take a slap across the face for the disrespect. But he never said anything and his silence told her everything. "Shit..." She mumbled pacing on the spot, her fingers running through her hair. When she looked back at him she could see his tears. "What does he have on you?" Her voice was a little softer but there was still an edge.

"He found out some shit when he was digging into our profiles and he's threatening me with it."

"He's blackmailing you to give him intel." Nicole was now sitting on the old couch her eyes glued to Juice watching his every reaction.

"Yes." _At least he has the decently to look to ashamed. _

"What does he has on you?" Juice didn't want to tell her but he did still respect both her and the club so he was going to tell he truth plus he was so sick of hiding this.

"My dad. He's black." Juice finally looked up at her. She was looking at him confused. She didn't understand this. "Come on Nic..you know the club, the rules. They find out they'll kick me out..." Nicole got to her feet and came to stand in front of him.

"Your right I do know the rules Juice. What does it say on your birth certificate?"

"What..."

"Under race, what does it say?"

"Hispanic."

"Then that's what you are. Half the guys in this club and other charters don't even know who their dad's are Juice. Any of them could have a black daddy." Juice wiped his tears on his sleeve as he started to laugh.

"I've been really stupid..."

"Just how stupid have you been Juice?" He looked up at her. "Have you given him anything? Anything that could damage this club?" Juice swallowed hard. He wanted to be honest with her, he had been honest with her but he knew he couldn't tell her the truth about what he had told them or done for Roosevelt nor could he tell her about the RICO case. It was a truth to far, it was a truth that would get him killed and he already knew that he wasn't ready to die. So he found himself lying to her, again.

"No I've given him a little bit but nothing that could land the club inside."

"And your done right...this..this deal it's over?" Juice nodded. "If you're lying to me..."

"I'm not." Juice shot to his feet in front of her. "No one needs to know about this, it's over." Nicole wished that was true but she knew putting Happy's mind at rest about Juice was going to be a lot easier said than done.

"Okay. Now we should go and help the guys. Their organising stuff for the memorial." Nicole's voice dropped again and she could feel the tears burning behind her eyes.

"You okay?"

"I'm fine." She snapped, still mad at him.

Stepping out of the office Nicole started to make her way across the lot when she stopped causing Juice to bump straight into the back of her, but Nicole barely noticed because her full attention was fixed on the dark eyes that were staring at her from across the other side of the lot.

"What is it?...Nic?" Juice reached out and placed his hand on her shoulder.

"Huh.." Nicole finally tore her eyes from Happy's and looked over her shoulder at Juice.

"You okay?"

"You should probably go and see if they need you."

"Yeah...are we good?" Nicole looked back and watched Happy get on his bike along with Tig, Opie and Bobby. She wanted to answer but her mouth was like sand paper and she couldn't even form a sentence. Happy was pissed and she knew that she was going to have to answer to him at some point.

Juice gave up on waiting for an answer so instead he stepped around her and headed for his brothers.

"Hey, where are you going?"

"Just got a call from Oswald seems that Georgie's investors actually came through." Tig remarked as he put on his helmet.

"Shit, that means Charming heights is a go?" Juice asked rubbing his hand over his mohawk.

"Yeah. We're gonna pay him a little visit." Bobby spat. He'd been waiting for this day for a long time. The asshole had killed Luanne and now finally she was going to be avenged. And the lie he had told Otto about killing Georgie was finally about to become true.

"You need a hand?"

"No." Juice looked at Happy. His voice was more bitter than normal and Juice wondered what he had done to upset the killer. Either way he wasn't about to question him. So Juice nodded and stepped back as they pulled out the lot.

Nicole stood back watching the exchange. Happy only said one word to Juice from what she could see but Nicole was pretty dam sure that one word was all that Happy needed.

* * *

Nicole sat at the kitchen table a bottle and a glass of vodka in front of her and a cigarette in hand. She had been sat like that since she had got back just over an hour ago. She had checked in with Jax and he told her Tara was doing better- at least that was one thing because everything else seemed to be going to shit lately.

Nicole drained what was left in her glass as the door opened. She looked up to see Gemma coming to join her, she grabbed a glass though before she sat down. Nicole didn't wait for her to ask instead she just poured her a glass.

"Jackson told me what happened today. You doin' okay baby?"

"Nope." Nicole didn't see the point in lying. "Spoke to Jay myself he said Tara was doing okay, surgery went well."

"Yeah." Gemma rolled eyes and took a swig of her drink.

"I know why she did it." Gemma stared at Nicole. When she had met with Wendy today telling Gemma or anyone for that matter was the last thing on her mind but Nicole was fed up of doing things on her own and truthfully she really didn't have any idea on how to handle this. Nicole lent forward and pulled the card she had snagged off the hospital floor out of the back pocket of her jeans. She slid the note across the table. "I met with her today. She's wants to get to know Abel."

"That Junkie whore." Nicole took a drag of her cigarette before continuing. Trying not to be offended by her Aunts description of Wendy.

"I said I would help her." Nicole felt herself cower under her Aunts disapproving look.

"Why, she almost killed Abel you remember that?" Nicole took a deep breath. She had to do this she had to tell her the truth, well some of it.

"I know, but I have no choice." Gemma cocked a brow.

"What?"

"Those 5 months before I went to LA, before I met Liam, I...I was in a bad place and I hit rock bottom. Got myself into trouble, trouble that Wendy helped me out of. I owe her."

Gemma stared at her Niece. She wasn't looking at her and Gemma knew she was ashamed. She also knew exactly what kind of trouble Nicole was referring to, and it probably involved pumping her system full of drugs. Drugs had always been a bit of a grey area with Nicole and Gemma always worried that one day she this would happen. And she was angry that Nicole had kept that shit to herself especially as it seemed that her little secret was now being used against her. But then again they were all guilty of keeping secrets.

"You owe that bitch nothing she owes this family. You leave this to me i'll handle this shit." Nicole looked up at Gemma a little shocked she expected her to tear her a new one but she didn't even look angry.

"I'm sorry I kept this from you..but I don't want anyone else knowing about this Gem...Jay he can't know."

"I'll keep it quiet. But if you start that shit up again I will personally shove my size 9's up your ass."

"I've been clean for 10 months Gem I'm doing good." That was a slight lie. Today had been shit losing Kozik her closest and probably only friend at the moment hurt like hell, and yes the thought of a drag on a joint or line of something was very tempting. But so far Nicole was resisting that urge.

"Been a rough couple of days..."

"Yeah it has...I'm okay Gem I promise.."

"Okay." Nicole didn't miss the way Gemma was giving her the once over. "When's the memorial?" Gemma asked after moments of silence.

"Tomorrow morning. Lee and Victor, Kozik's brother are on their way here. Their going to take his body back to Tacoma. Vic wants him close to him and their sister." Gemma nodded. "Do any of the other guy's know about..." Nicole pointed at Gemma's face.

"Just Jackson and Happy. Unless you've told anyone else."

"No. You going to come?"

"I guess."

"Clay will be there."

"Yeah but so will you and Jackson."

"Everyone will have questions..."

"And I'll answer them." Gemma reached out and placed her hand on top of Nicole's that was resting on the table. "I'm not going to hide this baby Clay has to live with what he's done." Nicole agreed with that a 110%. She poured them both another drink.

* * *

Opie parked his bike outside his Old Man's cabin. He had tried calling him to let him know about Kozik but he hadn't answered. Opie wasn't surprised, Piney was probably already passed out in a fog of Tequila. Walking up the steps to the cabin he was surprised to see the door slightly ajar. _Old Man was to drunk to shut the damn door. _That's what he thought anyway but as he walked inside and looked around he found him lying on the floor a gaping hole in his chest.

"Pop..." Opie reached him in one big stride and fell to his knees beside him. "Pop." The stench was almost unbearable but it didn't stop Opie trying to shake Piney awake. "Dad..Dad..." He fell back onto the heels of his feet. "Oh...shit..shit..." He didn't even realise he was crying as he tried to shake him awake again. "Pop...No...no.."Opie jumped to his feet when he heard the front door creek. He wasted no time in drawing his gun and grabbing Unser as he pinned him to the wall, his gun shoved in his face. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE..." Unser could see the distress and panic in Opie's eyes and Unser was worried that Opie might actually shoot him.

"Easy..easy..." Unser raised his hands in a surrendering motion. "I followed you up here."

"YOU KNEW ABOUT THIS?"

"Yes..yes.."

"WHO..who did this...Why didn't you tell me?"

"That's why I'm here now."

"Was it the Mexicans...or the..."

"No..no.."

"Talk to me..." Opie felt like was about to explode. He needed answers. His Dad was dead..murdered and he wanted to know who the hell was responsible.

"Clay...Clay killed your Old Man."

"What?" Opie wasn't sure if he had heard Unser right. This was Clay? "That's bullshit.."

"I wish it was. Piney had some kind of leverage on Clay, was using it to get the Club out of the Cartel deal. Clay came up here to change his mind. Things went south. He killed him." Opie still didn't want to believe it.

"How do you know all this?"

"Gemma found out. She asked me to come up here and fix this thing, make it look like it was the Cartel." Unser watched Opie take it all in and although he still kept the gun pointed at him Unser knew that he was getting through to him.

Opie didn't speak for ages and Unser kept his mouth shut giving him time to take it all in. He was happy when Opie finally lowered the gun and backed away from him. Unser straightened himself up before he spoke again.

"Gemma confronted Clay about Piney. He almost killed her. Beat her bloody." Unser watched as Opie finally gave in to his tears as he dropped to the floor beside Piney. "Clay is out of control. Your no stranger to that. He tried to kill you but killed your wife. Now he's killed your father to. If you don't believe me go see Gemma's face. Ask her who did it." He watched as Opie managed to force himself back onto his feet as he turned back to him. "Clay needs to go, before he kills someone else you love."

* * *

The following morning Nicole stood in front of her full length mirror and ran her hands over her dress. She felt like shit, her and Gemma had emptied two bottles last night and Nicole was defiantly feeling it.

"You look nice." Nicole looked over her shoulder to see Jax standing in the door way. Normally she didn't wear dresses and she would never normally wear this sort of outfit to a memorial but she remembered the look on Kozik's face the time she walked out of her room and told him that she was going to Hale's funeral. He had defiantly been admiring how the black dress clung to her curves and how the curved neckline showed off her cleavage, so that was why she decided on wearing the dress, it was for him.

"Thanks." She turned from the mirror and grabbed her bag off her bed.

"You do realise that I ain't taking you on my bike in a dress like that." It wasn't a short dress but Nicole and Jax both knew that she would have to hitch up near her ass to be able to ride on his bike.

"I'll go with Gemma." Jax pushed himself from the door and went to her. She looked so sad.

"You gonna be a'right?"

"Yeah. I just hate these things."

"Me too." Both of them had been to way to many of these things considering their age.

"Hows Tara?" Jax huffed and shook his head. "What?"

"Reason she smashed her cast, Wendy showed up. Apparently she's now realised she has a kid and wants to see him." Nicole just nodded. She couldn't deal with lying to him or trying to defend Wendy. It was best just to stay quiet. Thankfully at that point Gemma joined them.

"We ready?"

"Yeah." Nicole looked from Gemma back to Jax. "I'll see you there." Jax nodded and kissed her cheek.

* * *

Opie sat at the bar nursing a Whisky as he watched Nicole and Gemma say their goodbyes to Kozik who was resting in the Chapel. Gemma may have done her best to hide the bruises, make-up dark glasses, but they were still visible and that was all he needed. Match those bruises with the scratches on Clay's face, the way Jax had called Clay out the warehouse when they were looking over the merchandise for the Irish and the way both Nicole and Gemma had avoided Clay when they entered the clubhouse, all proved that Unser had spoken the truth. Downing what was left in his glass he slammed it on the bar and walked out.

* * *

Happy couldn't stop himself from watching her-even though he was still pissed at her for disobeying him yesterday- and he hated what he was seeing. Of course most of his brothers had raised a glass for the loss of their brother but most of them were taking it easy. One because they had business to deal with later and two because it was 10 in the morning. But that did not seem to bother Nicole. He watched her snag a bottle of vodka from behind the bar, the only saving grace was that she was at least topping it up with some coke.

He didn't like seeing her like this, well he didn't mind seeing her in that dress, but he didn't like seeing her drowning herself in booze. She was going to end up smashed and by the way she had been eyeing Clay for the past twenty minutes he was worried she was going to lose her shit.

Tensions were already running high, not just because they were saying goodbye to a much loved bother but everyone had seen the state of Gemma's face and it didn't take any of them long to put two and two together. Happy had already seen Tig pull Clay aside. He hadn't seen exactly what had gone down but he did notice that when Tig re-emerged he was missing his Sergeant-of-Arms patch.

Everything was starting to change.

A couple of hours later Happy helped along with Jax, Tig, Clay, Lee and Victor carry Kozik into the van that would be transporting him back to Tacoma.

Knowing that they would be heading out soon to meet up with the Irish Kings Happy took the opportunity to go and find Nicole. He wasn't surprised to find in Jax's dorm necking back straight Vodka now. She looked up at him and rolled her eyes. _At least she knows she's in the shit _Happy thought as he shut the door behind him.

"If you're going to have a go at me please can you leave it till later I'm really not in the mood right now." Nicole took another swig from the bottle before getting to her feet. She knew that Happy wouldn't back off so she thought if she headed to the bathroom, force some distance between that he would back off. She was wrong. Happy grabbed her arm before she even managed to take two steps.

Just like he had predicted she was wasted. He barely touched her and she almost fell, he would have blamed the heels she had been strutting around in all morning but considering the dramatic height difference between them he knew she wasn't wearing them.

"What were you doin' with Juice?" He snapped pulling her closer.

"Hap.."

"Tell me." He demanded his patience with her wearing very thin.

"I have always trusted you never doubted you right?..."

"Don't do as your fucking told though..." Nicole didn't miss that his voice got lower, darker.

"I'm not your Old Lady Hap, I just happen to be the girl you're fucking right now." She felt his grip tighten before he abruptly let go of her, she stumbled back but quickly recovered keeping herself on her feet.

"Yeah your right you ain't my problem..." Nicole ignored the pain that his words left and called him back as he headed for the door.

"Hap...He's not a rat. He's not working with Roosevelt...please just trust me on that..." Happy just looked at her. He was so pissed off right now but he listened to her and took her words as the truth. Nicole wouldn't lie about something like this especially as Jax was involved so he nodded and left her, making sure he slammed the door behind him.

Nicole just stared at the door where he had just left. On one had she was glad that he seemed to believe her about Juice but on the other hand she knew that she may have just fucked things up with Happy.


	29. Chapter 29

Hey, so I managed to find a spare hour to get this up. Again I only had chance to give it a quick once over so I apologise again if there are mistakes.

So we are on the home straight now, there are only a few chapters left and I'm hoping that work quiets down again so I will be able to find some spare time allowing me to update, because you all know that I hate leaving you lovely readers hanging.

Anyway hope you enjoy this chapter and as always thankyou for all the lovely reviews and to those who have added me and this story to your favs and to those who are just reading. Love you all.

Everything Changes

Chapter Twenty Nine

"We understood yer need to shed the Russians and fuellin' our small arms to da Mexicans was a reasonable risk, but everything that's happened since, not very reasonable at t'all." Galen spoke as he looked around the gathered Sons as they stood in warehouse that housed their guns.

"The blood shed was an internal Cartel beef. It's been handled." Jax tried to reason with the Irish king.

"Handled by the guns dat we specificity told ya not ta use..." Galen argued.

"Those RPG's saved my life brother. Jax doesn't make that call we wouldn't be standing here right now." Clay argued back in defence of his VP.

"If we weren't in bed wit those dirty wetbacks we wouldn't be standin' ere either. I'd be at home restin'." Galen looked at Jax. "So would yer girl."

"Look you trust me, I trust Gallindo. We're talking bout a once in a life time opportunity here."

"Romeo understands the need for discretion." Jax continued picking up where Clay had left.

"Look all these big guns will be used south of da border." Chibs informed them as he stepped around Jax. "None of dis shite will blow back on da cause."

"I need assurances." Galen stated. He was not about to go into this blind.

"We're going to meet with Romeo tomorrow he will answer all your questions and concerns I promise." Clay hoped that this would convince them.

"The meet needs to be on neutral ground. Bring dem a sample of the weapons. If it works out bring em back here, do the exchange." Galen told him.

"There's an Indian Reservation 10 mintues from here. Very private."

"3 o'clock."

"Good." Clay and Galen shook hands and the Irish Kings went on there way.

As everyone made their way back to their bikes Juice hung back. Flipping open his cell he sent a quick text to the feds giving them the location and time that they were going to be meeting the Irish kings. Mounting his bike Juice hoped to god that he was doing the right thing but deep down he knew he wasn't, even more so now after his talk to Nicole.

* * *

When they returned to Clubhouse Jax pulled Bobby and Clay aside so that he could talk them. He knew that Clay had divulged to Bobby about his plans in leaving which is why he wanted him there, this included him. Jax lead them into the empty garage so they could talk in private as there were still a few hangaround's and sweetbutts around.

"After this deal goes down tomorrow we put a ticking clock on the blow. Tell Romeo we still run his guns but he's got to find someone else to mule. Blame it on the Irish. Tell Gallindo their gonna bail if we keep trucking powder."

"It's too soon to push for that." Clay expressed as he looked out over the lot his eyes landing on his niece who had just stumbled out the clubhouse with a hangaround.

"No it's too late." Jax snapped back at his President. "We're gonna make more in the next two shipments than we normally make in two years. I'm taking my piece and I'm out." Jax turned to Clay. "When you step down gavel should go to Bobby." Jax turned back to Bobby. "Chibs is your VP." Ignoring the exchange of looks between Bobby and Clay Jax continued. "Tig ain't gonna carry it, I think the Sergeant patch should go to Happy."

"Your really going to do this?" Bobby asked.

"I love this club Bobby but I love my family more." Bobby shook his head. He looked over at Clay and noticed that he was staring across the lot. Following his line of sight Bobby saw Nicole sat on top of the picnic table a couple of hangarounds and sweetbutts around her. Even from where he was standing Bobby could tell that she was drunk. He had noticed a change in the girl since she had got back, she was hiding something that was for sure and Bobby knew that she probably needed Jax now more than ever but here he was telling him that he was leaving.

"Family, putting them first I get that. But what about her?" Bobby cocked his head in Nicole's direction. Jax looked over his shoulder. His eyes landed on her straight away and he cursed under his breath. She looked a mess and he hated seeing her like that. He'd had this argument with himself a 100 times, gone over the pro and cons of leaving her and up until Tara's attempted kidnapping Jax was having serious doubts about leaving Nicole behind, but now he had made a decision that he had to leave which is why he had asked Opie to look after her, and finally today he had agreed to that. She was going to be okay, even if she didn't look like it now.

"She'll be fine." Jax said over his shoulder. He knew he was trying to convince himself more than Bobby. As he continued to watch Nicole Jax saw Chibs walk out of the clubhouse. It set him a little more at ease to see Chibs give one of the guys that was sniffing around her a look that made him back off her instantly, all the guys would keep eyes on her. He turned back to Bobby and Clay. "Look we've gotta close this deal before I tell the rest of the club. Nicole to. I don't want my exit pulling focus."

Chibs joined them and handed the phone he was holding to Clay. "Galen." Clay nodded and accepted the phone as he stepped away from the three of them. Chibs turned his attention to Jax. "Think Nic might need ta go home." Jax looked back over to where she was just in time to see her disappear inside with one of the guys. "Guy's gettin' a little to close."

"A'right I'll sort it." Jax didn't miss the _I told you so look _ from Bobby.

"Otto reached out I'm gonna head up to Stockton." Jax nodded knowing that Bobby had to be the one to tell Otto about Georgie, it was for his own piece of mind. He owed it to Otto.

"Galen needs some back up. I've gotta connect with Romeo." Clay announced as he rejoined the group.

"I've got it. I'll take Chibs with me translate the Cathlic." Jax mocked as he playfully hit Chibs in the chest.

"Take Tig and Happy with you just in case." Jax nodded at Clay's order.

Jax and Chibs started making their way across the lot. "We got time to take er' home?"

"Yeah we'll drop her off on the way."

"She ain't handlin' dis shite."

"I know. It's just been one thing after another lately she'll be a'right though." Again Jax was trying to convince himself more than Chibs.

* * *

Nicole could feel their eyes on her and it was just pissing her off. Everyone seemed to be looking down at her and she knew exactly what they were thinking. _Poor fucked up little Nicole. _She hated it. They may have just lost a bother but she had just lost a friend she was more than entitled to blow off some steam get drunk and cry if she wanted to. She didn't need their fucking permission and she didn't need their approval. Even if Chibs insisted on giving it to Dan..Darren..Davis...whatever his name was.

As she went to take a swig of her drink she realised that she was empty. Turning to face the nameless guy she slid off the table and slid up next to him. She may not know his name but she did know that he was cute and he was willing even after Chibs' little warning.

"I'm empty." The nameless guy smiled at her and took her hand leading her inside.

Nicole stumbled as he entered but the guy caught her and they both started to laugh. She felt his arm wrap around her waist. She knew that she should back away but for some reason she didn't instead she let him lead her towards the bar.

"A beer and a Vodka."

"Uh..." Phil who happened to be behind the bar took one look at the state of Nicole and knew she shouldn't have anymore. "I think she's had enough..."

"The girl wants a drink man..." The hangaround snapped.

"Yeah...come..on..." Nicole lent across the bar. "Plllleeeeaassseee." The guy started laughing but Phil didn't see anything funny about this. "Fine." Nicole turned in the hangarounds arm. "I know where we can get a drink."

"Yeah." Nicole nodded her head. Taking his hand in hers she started leading him back towards Jax's dorm room.

His hands rested on her hips as Nicole fumbled with the door. She had just gotten the key in the lock when she heard the door slam shut down the hall. "Fuck." She mumbled under her breath. She didn't even need to look who it was how bad her luck was lately it could only be one person. However as she reluctantly looked down the hall she was surprised to see not only Happy but Tig. "Great." Looking away Nicole returned her focus on getting the door in front of her open.

Tig knew that this was not about to end well. He knew that Hap had been tapping Nic before they'd gone inside, he wasn't sure where they stood now but either way Tig knew that the killer beside him was pissed. His shoulders were tense his jaw was flexing and he hadn't stop staring at her since he stepped out from his dorm. Tig knew he had to step in and handle this shit before they were burying another body today. Happy did not like to share what was his.

"Doll..." Tig started walking down the hall towards her. Nicole rolled her eyes before looking up at Tig. "What ya doin'?" She watched as he cocked his head to the guy that was behind her before his eyes they moved down her body as a pair of arms wrapped around her waist. Tig's eye snapped back to hers. She was up shit creek and she defiantly did not have a paddle.

"What do you think?" Nicole snapped as she unlocked the door. Tig jumped into action, he heard movement from behind him and he knew he needed to reach the pair before Happy did.

Tig reached her in three big strides and roughly grabbed the guy by the collar of his shirt dragging him from Nicole.

"Woah dude..."

"Shut it asshole."

"Jesus Tigger." Nicole shouted as she tried to prise the hangaround from Tig's vice grip. Tig shot her a look daring herto keep going, it was a look she had seen on Tig many times before but never once had that look been directed at her. She was relived when he turned his attention back to the hangaround as he dragged him further down the hall.

Nicole turned and went to open the door to Jax's dorm but as soon as she had it open a hand wrapped over the top of her hand that was on the doorknob and the door came slamming shut and her back was slammed against the now shut door. Happy's hand roughly gripping her jaw, forcing her to look at him. Nicole tried to move away from him but he pressed his body against her trapping her even more. She watched his eyes dart over her face before finally resting on her eyes.

He shouldn't have left her, he had made a promise and less than 12 hours later he had already fucked it up. When Kozik had asked him rather begged him to keep her safe Happy barely had to think about it. But at the first chance he got he bailed on her, all because she pissed him and now he had to look into hers eyes knowing he had let down a brother as well as her. She was smashed but she had been that way when he stormed out of her room-he still didn't know why he let her drunken comment affect him so much-but now as he looked into her dilated pupils he knew that because of him she had fallen into old habits. Well he might have been the cause but that didn't mean that he was going allow her to do this even if she was a stubborn bitch...

"What have you taken...what?"

* * *

Jax and Chibs walked into the clubhouse just in time to see Tig hauling the guy that been sniffing around Nicole through the bar.

"What's goin' on?"

"Ah..." Tig looked over his shoulder towards the hall. Jax slapped the back of his hand against Chibs' chest and the two of them headed for the hall, however they both stopped in their tracks when they rounded the corner. Jax knew he had been a little vacant when it came to Nicole lately, it wasn't intentional but with the pile of shit mounting around him and the club and the way Tara was at the moment he had let his big cousin duties slide a little and obviously he had missed something, because he could not understand for the life of him why his brother, Happy, had his baby cousin pinned against the door to his dorm room. Jax was already pissed off and witnessing this wasn't helping.

"Hey..." Jax shouted as he made his way to his cousin defense.

Nicole looked out the corner of her eye to see Jax striding towards them looking pissed, Chibs not far behind him. She felt herself start to panic and her eyes shot back to Happy's who's eyes hadn't seem to move from her. She gave him a pleading look silently begging him not to say anything but she got nothing back.

"Hey..." Happy felt a hand on his arm pulling his hand off of Nicole. Finally tearing his eyes from her Happy looked at Jax who still had hold of him before looking over his shoulder at Chibs. Both men looked mad but right now Happy was finding it very hard to care. He glanced back at Nicole and he could see her shaking and under any other circumstance he would feel bad for scaring her but again he found it hard to care right now. He had made a promise to brother and he was going to keep that promise no matter what.

"Sorry..." Happy said looking back at his VP before striding past the two men. Jax watched Happy leave before turning his attention back to Nicole.

"What the hell...you a'right." His hand came up to her face but Nicole avoided his touch. He looked over his shoulder at Chibs when he heard him clear his throat.

"I'll be outside Jackie boy..." Jax nodded and looked back at his clearly shaken cousin.

"Did you he hurt you?"

"NO..." Nicole snapped pushing away his hands. "He just...we...he didn't hurt me he wouldn't..."

"He had you pinned against my fuckin' door..."

"Just leave it Jay..."

"No..."

"Jackson just leave me alone..." Nicole opened the door and slammed it shut behind her. Jax slammed his hand against the now closed door. He knew he should go after her, force her to tell him what the hell was going on and explain what he had just witnessed but he just didn't have the time...again...it seemed to be the norm lately he just didn't have time for her and he wondered if that was why she was acting the way she was. Stepping back from the door he silently made a promise to himself that once he had dealt with whatever it was Galen needed them for he would take some time out reconnect with his little cousin.

Chibs came to his side his hand resting on his back as they both headed through the clubhouse.

"Lass good?"

"I don't know man." Jax shook his head. His words couldn't have been truer. He really had no idea what was going on not just with Nicole but this whole situation. Walking outside with the Scot Jax's eyes found Happy. He was standing with Tig near his bike the two seemed to be having a very cozy little conversation. Jax did not like it. When they reached the two Jax looked between Tig and Chibs. "Give us a minute." Both men didn't put up an argument. "Wanna tell me what the hell that was back there?" Jax snapped giving his full attention to Happy.

"Nothin'..."

"Don't give me that bullshit. You had my cousin pinned up against a fuckin' wall..." Jax seethed. He was sick of seeing the women he loved getting hurt. Happy rubbed the back of his neck. Trying to explain this shit to Jax was never going to be easy he wouldn't get it, his over protectiveness-a trait Happy admired when it was aimed in the right direction-of Nicole would blind him. Happy grabbed his helmet off the handle bars of bike.

"She ain't a kid man..." Happy tried to ignore the irony of his words. Saying she wasn't a kid even though he always called her that. "It's just gone 12 and she's already smashed lettin' a fuckin' hangaround get handsy with her. She was actin' outta line, she needed tellin'." Jax wanted to argue with Happy but he couldn't because Happy was bringing up some good fucking points. But even so he didn't need a brother pointing that out.

"Ain't your call to make brother." Happy just shrugged. "What you think it is?"

"Maybe, maybe not."

"Jackie boy we got ta go..." Jax broke his stare with Happy and turned to Chibs nodding his head before looking back at Happy.

"You in on this?"

"Absolutely."

* * *

Gemma lent back in her chair her feet resting on the desk as she let the effects of her last joint kick in. Today had been worse than she thought, of course she had kept the Gemma Teller Morrow façade up but now that she was alone in the garage office she finally let her guard down. It wasn't the reactions of all the sons that was getting to her, most of them apart from Tig kept their opinions to themselves even if their feelings were written all over their faces, no them she could handle it was being in the same room as Clay that got to her. She hadn't expected to feel the way she did, since he lay hands on her she had basically set the wheels in motion for his death but when she saw him today all that hate she had for him seemed to fade slightly and for the first time she understood what Nicole must have felt. It was strange feeling and Gemma did not like it. She liked to be in control and this new feeling was not something she could seem to control which is why she had locked herself away in the office.

She was enjoying her buzz when there was a knock on the door. She wanted to scream at whoever it was interrupting her down time but before she could open her mouth the door was already opening.

Swinging her legs off the desk Gemma straightened up in her chair as Lyla stepped inside. Gemma was a little surprised to see her, last she had heard Lyla had packed her bags and taken Piper and ran off to her sisters. So her appearance was a little surprising. Again Gemma got that out of control feeling.

"Hey Gemma..." Gemma stared at Lyla for a moment daring her to make a comment. Lyla wasn't exactly being subtle as she stared at the bruises covering her face, and considering Gemma was already pissed at the little cum star for bailing on Opie and that she wasn't in a very good mood to begin with Gemma was just itching to have a go at someone, but the little bitch ignored the obvious elephant it the room and placed a bigger smile on her face as she walked further into the small office.

"You decided to come back to your marriage then?" If Lyla wasn't willingly going to start an argument Gemma was defiantly going to try and provoke her.

"Yeah." Lyla spoke with embarrassment as her arms crossed over her chest.

"So..." Lyla had obviously come here for something and Gemma just wished she would kind of get to it so she would leave her alone.

"I was just wondering if you have seen Opie. When I came home he bolted saying he was going up to the cabin to his dad but he never came home last nigh...did...did he stay here, did he spend the night with someone..." Gemma just stared at the nervous girl in front of her. Gemma hadn't heard the last part of what Lyla had said all she heard was that Opie had gone up to the cabin. The thought that it might be a lie he spun to his wife just so he could leave never crossed her mind all she could think about was Piney on the floor with a gaping hole in his chest and Opie finding that. She remembered seeing him today at first she didn't think much of it but now...now the way he had been looking at her, the way he had stormed out of the clubhouse he knew that this was Clay. "Gemma." Hearing Lyla's delicate voice Gemma looked up at her. "Did he spend the night here with..."

"No baby he didn't." She actually saw the relief wash over the young girl. Gemma got to her feet. "You should go home, i'm sure he'll come back when he's ready. It's been a pretty rough day here. Kozik passed away."

"Shit sorry I didn't know."

"It's fine. But I've gotta go, got things to do."

"Of course." Gemma came to stand beside her.

"Go home baby, he'll come home when he's ready." Gemma almost ran out of the office. She looked around the lot before storming over to Bobby who was straddling his bike. "Where's Clay?"

"Got a meet with Romeo."

"Jackson?"

"Gone to help Galen with something. Everything alright?"

"No."

* * *

Gemma knew she would never find Clay so she headed to the Hospital to see Tara, keep an eye on her just in case her so called husband came to finish the job. As she started making her way to Tara's room she was surprised to see Phil walking towards her especially as he was supposed to be guarding Tara.

"Where are you goin?"

"Grab a soda, Clay's with Tara."

"He's alone with her?"

"Yeah."

* * *

Clay opened the door to Tara's room. As he closed it his hand tried to find the lock only to be let down, there wasn't one. As he came to stand at the end of her bed he realised she was asleep. She stirred as if she had felt his presence, she jumped when she saw him standing there.

"Where's Jax?"

"Finishing up some things. Wanted me to come by check on you."

"Uh thanks." Tara shifted up her bed as she rubbed her eyes. The last thing she had expected to see when she woke up was Clay standing over her bed.

"It's fine. We've got to get you better get you ready to go. You and Jax have a plan." Tara could hear the resentment in his voice. Her eyes followed him as he took a seat in the chair beside her bed. "Putting all this violence behind you, it's a smart move. I'd hate to see something get in the way of that."

"Really?"

"You know I can make sure that nothing or nobody gets in your way." Tara just looked at him as she got a sickening feeling in her stomach she knew where this was leading, but a small part of her was intrigued by what he was saying/offering.

"Even Gemma, Nicole?" Clay smirked at her and it sent a shiver down he spine.

"Don't worry about them. They won't cause you any trouble." Tara could only imagine what lengths Clay would go to. She had seen the mess he had made of Gemma's face although looking at Clay now it did seem that she managed to get in a few shots herself. "There is only one thing that could get in your way."

"What's that?"

"Those letters." Tara swallowed hard. She had suspicions that Gemma would have told Clay about the letters and although the thought did scare her she never thought Clay would approach her like this.

"Gemma told you about them didn't she?"

"She thought you were gonna show them to Jax, create a shit storm. But your a smart girl Tara, you know what happens if Jax reads those letters, that's the reason he doesn't have them already. It complicates your departure. You need to give me the letters."

"If your so sure I'm not going to give them to Jax why do you need them?"

"Piece of mind." He remarked giving her that smirk again as he got to his feet. "I wanna be able to sleep at night. You understand that? You give me the letters I destroy them, you and Jax leave with the boys everybody's happy...and safe."

"And if I don't give them to you?"

"I'm not sure you and Jax ever make it out of Charming."

* * *

Gemma's heels echoed in the hallway as she ran as quick as she could towards Tara's room. Rounding the corner to the hallway that led to her room Gemma stumbled to a stop when she saw Clay approaching her.

"She's fine." Clay assured Gemma as he continued down the hall. Gemma nodded as she to continued down the hall. Gemma wanted to walk straight pass him, wanted to ignore the voice in her head screaming at her to warn him but she couldn't and she found herself stopping in front of him as she removed her oversized sunglasses.

"Opie knows?"

"Knows?"

"About Piney. Lyla came to see me today said Ope never came home. He told her that he was heading up to the cabin to check on Piney." Clay nodded and Gemma felt herself take a step closer towards him. "He's gonna know this is you."

"How?" Clay pointed this shit at the Cartel there was noway Opie would believe this was him.

"History..." She motioned her hand to her face... "This. He was looking at me hard today, you saw him storm out the clubhouse. Opie won't let this slide like Donna, you won't be able to talk him round."

"Why are you tellin' me this?" Gemma's hands came up to cradle his face.

"I love you Clay." She kissed him softly on the cheek.

Clay watched his wife disappear into Tara's room. He thought he had gotten away with it all, thought he had just convinced Tara to give him the letters that there was finally going to be an end to all this but now Gemma had dropped this on him. At least she had given him warning at least now he would be prepared for when Opie came for him, because he would.


	30. Chapter 30

Hey, so here's the next chapter sorry it's taken me a little longer to upload than usual but as I said in the last chapter I was slammed at work. Thankfully most of my staff are better now so I should be able to upload the next chapter a little quicker.

And as usual thank you so so so much for all your kind reviews I just love hearing what you think. And to all those who have added me and this story to their favs, it's great knowing that people are enjoying reading this and that I am gaining new readers all the time. Anyway hope you enjoy this chapter and like I said before we're on the home straight now, just two more chapters after this one (maybe three).

Enjoy love you all...

Everything Changes

Chapter Thirty 

After finishing up with Galen Jax told the guys to head home, Tara had called telling him she was being discharged in an hour so Jax decided to use the spare time to go back to the clubhouse and try and talk with Nicole and figure out what the hell was going on with her, which was the other reason he had told the guys to head back he knew that there was more chance of her opening up if they were alone.

He was about to follow his brothers when his phone started ringing again. Snagging it from the front pocket of his jeans he was surprised to see Opie's number flash up on the screen, for some reason he was expecting it to be his mother, or Tara.

"Hey bro..."

"_You need to come to Skeeters now..." _Jax pulled the phone from his ear and stared at the screen. Opie had hung up on him. Jax was confused as to why Opie of all people would be at Skeeters. He tried calling him back but all he got was voicemail. He ran his hand over his face. Looks like he wasn't about to get that quality time with his cousin like he had planned.

Jax opened the door to the cremation room to find Opie standing there watching the flames of the furnace burn, his eyes only leaving as Jax walked further into the room. Jax was about to ask what the hell was going on but then he saw the cut Opie was clutching in his clenched fists and it all became clear to him.

"Oh my god..."Jax stood in front of Opie who was just staring at him blankly. Hardly surprising considering. "What happened?"

"Found him at the cabin, shotgun to the chest." Jax eyes wondered from his clearly distraught best friend to the flames and then back again.

"Jesus Christ." Jax pulled him into a hug. "I'm so sorry."

"Yeah." Opie tried to control his anger but was finding it incredibly hard with having Jax so close, so he slowly pulled out from the fierce embrace of his best friend recreating a little distance.

"You think it was the Mexicans?" Jax asked eager to find out who did this.

"I'll fill you in. I just wanted to say goodbye. I know that he'd want you here." Opie had thought about calling Nicole to come as well, Piney had always thought of he as his own but Opie decided against it. He didn't want her to be present when he had to ask his best friend the most difficult questions he would probably ever ask anyone. She might not like the answers anymore than he would.

"Yeah..okay.." Jax watched on through glassy eyes as Opie threw Piney's cut into the flames.

They remained silent until the flames finally died.

* * *

Opie was already putting on his helmet when Jax headed for his own bike. He was concerned for his brother, best friend he knew exactly how a loss like this could hurt. He may have been 16 at the time but he doubted the pain was any different or easier even at 32, but it wasn't just that Jax was concerned about he had a suspicion that Opie was holding out on him, that he knew more about Piney's death than he was letting on.

"You wanna tell me what happened to Piney?" Jax asked when he reached his friend. Opie kept his back to him longer than Jax was comfortable with but when Opie finally did turn around Jax found himself taking steps away from his best friend as he stared down the barrel of Opie's gun.

"You tell me your Clay's boy..."

"What are you talkin' about?"

"Clay killed my Old man..." Opie seethed as he took a step closer towards his best friend. Gun still raised.

"No...No Ope..." Jax shook his head for emphasis. Opie was in shock that was the only thing Jax could think of because Clay couldn't do this. He couldn't. Jax just couldn't...didn't want to believe that Clay could do this.

"YES...He killed my wife...now my Father." Opie took a deep breath before he asked the question he was dreading the most. "Did you know...DID YOU KNOW?"

"NO...OF COURSE NOT OPE..." Jax yelled in disbelief that Opie, his best friend since birth had just asked him that. "Bro if Clay did this then it is a club issue...Lets take it to the table. Let everyone know."

"What table...your out remember." Opie said as he took the small steps back towards his bike. The gun he was aiming at his best friend moved to the tyre of his bike as he fired a shot. Hearing the air leave the tyre, and happy that Jax couldn't follow him and try and stop him from what he was about to. Opie mounted his bike and sped out of the parking lot.

* * *

Clay sat at the head of the table inhaling deeply on his Cigar. Today was the first time in a lifetime of underhand dealings that he felt that he was on the losing side. The club was split and new alliances had been created and all because he wanted to make more money, not for the club but for himself. His greed and his fear of his past discretion's coming to light were going to be the thing that killed him. He knew he had no one to blame but himself.

Gemma was the catalyst to all this she was the final nail to his coffin. He had seen the way his brothers were looking at him at the memorial for Kozik. Gemma was like a mother to all of them and they were pissed, none more so than his own right hand. The man who had stood by his side for nearly 20 years.

Tig had pulled him into the kitchen and told him more than a few home truths about how it was him that was destroying this club not the Cartel, how he had changed and how he fucked things up. Although he never voiced it Clay agreed. He expected some blow back fom Tig he loved Gemma but he hadn't expected him to pull out his knife and cut the Sergeant At Arms patch from his cut and hand it to him telling him he couldn't be that guy for him anymore.

It was a hit Clay had never envisioned and if he believed that maybe Tig was just blowing of steam letting his emotions get the better of him it was scattered by what happened a little over an hour and half ago.

_After Gemma's warning he returned to the clubhouse only to find it completely empty except for Tig who was sat on one of the leather sofas enjoying a massage from a couple of sweetbutts. Clay knew it was only a matter of time before Opie came for him and he wanted to be prepared he wanted backup but it seemed he was out of luck, but when he saw Tig he regained a little hope only to have it shattered. He may be pissed but that wouldn't matter when it really came down to it._

_He asked Tig to stay, that he had a bad feeling and that he might need an extra man around with a gun, Tig's answer was that Rat was in the garage. Clay couldn't believe that even after telling his right hand that he needed assistance the best he could offer was a prospect._

That was what woke Clay up and made him realise that he was losing his grip on everything. His Club, his family, everything.

He took the last drag of his cigar and reached for his gun that lay in front of him, when he heard the Harley pull into lot, headlights shining though the window.

This was it.

* * *

Nicole slowly opened her eyes well aware of the fact that when she did the headache she could feel would come out with a vengeance. The room was caped in darkness, for that she was thankful although it didn't ease the banging in her head like she hoped it would have. Easing herself into a seated position Nicole buried her head in her hands and closed he eyes again, but as she did the memories of the day flashed in front of her and with each memory she just wanted the room to just swallow her up. She had gotten herself in a complete state and she had broken her sobriety. She had been hurting so much and after drowning herself in Vodka and an ill timed argument with Happy she thought pills were the answer to all her problems. They weren't. They never were.

At the thought of earlier today Nicole felt her stomach turn and she was on her feet rushing into the small connecting bathroom where she fell to her knees and emptied the contents of her stomach. She hovered over the toilet until she was finally done, when she felt steady enough using the edge of the sink she eased herself back onto wobbly legs. Turning on the cold tap she splashed her face with and rinsed her mouth out. Drying her face with the towel she finally took a look at herself in the mirror in front of her.

She felt like shit and she certainly looked like it. "What the hell are you doing Teller." She chastised herself as she stared at her reflection.

She had made a mistake today a big fucking mistake and she knew that she was going to pay for that mistake. Happy's face came into her head and she swore she could actually feel his hand on her jaw as he asked the question she never thought, hoped, he would never ask. "_What have you taken..."_ Remembering that look in his eyes Nicole dropped back to her knees and emptied what was left in her stomach, as one fear circled around in her head. Happy knew everything.

* * *

When there was nothing left inside her Nicole finally felt ready to leave. Grabbing her shoes from the floor she headed out of Jax's dorm, hoping to find someone at the bar to take her home because she was pretty sure that Gemma wouldn't still be hanging around. Although she did hope that Jax, Tig or Happy weren't around either because she didn't think she could deal with them right now, Happy especially god only knows what he was going to do to her. Not just because of the drugs but she had let another guy put hands on her right in front of him, not her finest moment.

As she made her way down the hall she heard raised voices. Straining she tried to make out who it was but her head was still fuzzy, so she took a few steps closer to try and get a better listen and that was when she heard a man shout the name Donna and Nicole knew straight away that it was Opie who was doing the shouting. Opie didn't shout. Intrigued and a little worried Nicole moved closer towards the voices and couldn't believe what she stumbled upon.

Standing outside the open Chapel doors Nicole was stunned to see Opie pointing a gun at Clay. The shoes she was holding dropped to the floor and for the first time both men were altered to her presence.

"Get outta of here Nic..." Opie shouted at her as he returned his eyes to Clay. She looked to Clay who was staring at her. She had no idea what was going on here but she couldn't just leave Clay in this situation, Opie looked like he was about to pull the trigger on him any second.

"Princess..."

"DON'T." Opie shouted taking a step closer to Clay.

Before she could even think about it Nicole was in front of Clay. It was a reflex, maybe a stupid one but a reflex none the less. Clay was her family and she couldn't just stand there and watch as another person-someone else who she considered family-threatened his life.

Clay wasn't surprised that Nicole placed herself between himself and the gun Opie had trained on him, she had done the same thing when he had been the one training the gun at Jax. She always had a need to protect the people she loved, it was a trait she had learnt from a childhood of being brought up around Sons and it may be a trait he could use to his advantage. Opie loved her like a sister so Clay knew that Opie wouldn't attempt to shoot him for the fear of Nicole getting caught in the cross fire, so using that Clay reached out to grab a hold of her and pull her against him, but Opie was clever and he seemed to figure out what he was about do because before Clay could grab her Opie's large hand reached out and took hold of her arm pulling her to his side, her back firmly pressed against him as his big arm that wasn't holding the gun wrapped around her keeping he in place.

"Ope..." Nicole could hear her own voice shake. She had no idea what the hell this was about, what his problem was with Clay but she could feel the rapid beat of his heart pounding against her back and could feel his hot ragged breaths brushing against her skin. She had never seen Opie like this and it scared the crap out of her.

"Sit..." When Clay didn't move Nicole felt herself being moved forward as Opie advanced on Clay again. "Your going to die at the gavel."

"OPIE..." Nicole pleaded when she heard the words leave his mouth. Opie really planned on killing he Uncle..._What the hell is going on? _"Opie please...don't do this..."

Clay knew it wasn't going to be long before Opie spilled what was going on, what he had done and as he looked at Nicole he couldn't stand to see the look in her eyes when she found out. He didn't regret killing Piney even now when he may be facing his own death but he did regret that Nicole was going to find out about what he had done like this, especially when he knew he wouldn't be aloud to put his spin on it.

"Let her go, she doesn't need to be here for this."

"Actually I think she does. I think she needs to know exactly who her Uncle is...Now SIT.." Clay stole another look at Nicole who looked completely terrified by what was happening.

"Opie..." For the first time Opie actually heard her and he hated how scared she sounded. He wanted to look at her and reassure her but he couldn't tear his eyes from Clay. He wanted to avenge his Father, his Wife..and although he had planned on just killing Clay maybe Nicole stumbling in on them was a good thing. Clay would finally get to suffer his own loss because Opie knew that when Nicole heard the truth she would hate Clay as much as he did. She loved Piney.

"He killed Piney..."

"Wh..what..?"

"He put a shotgun to his chest and killed him..."

"Somebodies been lyin' to ya Ope..." Nicole eyes darted from looking up at Opie and landed on Clay as he spoke. She didn't think she had heard Opie right, Clay was many things and had done some bad shit but killing a member, a brother, a first nine. No..Nicole just couldn't believe Clay would do that he was right someone must have been feeding lies to Opie. It was the only explanation.

"Having Donna killed...WAS THAT A LIE..." Opie shouted and again Nicole felt herself being pushed forward as his grip tightened around her making her take a sharp in take of breath.

"That's history man..a mistake...it was Stahl bending the truth. That score is settled."

"NO IT'S NOT..." Nicole felt herself take another sharp breath from Opie's crushing grip. "YOU SIT DOWN."

"Opie please..." Nicole knew that her pleads weren't even registering with him. She looked at Clay who was still standing. "Clay just do as he says...please..." Clay didn't want to but he could tell now that Opie didn't care that Nicole was there not now that she was securely protected in his arms. Clay took a seat because he knew that Opie wouldn't leave until he had seen through what he had come there to do which was to kill him. All Clay could pray for now was that Opie didn't have the balls to go through with it. He took one last look at his niece gave her a small smile and then shut his eyes praying that the bullet never came.

Nicole heard the click of gun and she tried to free herself but it was pointless his hold was like a vice and there was no way that she was going to be able to get free, no way she was going to be able to protect Clay from this...She was going to have to watch her Uncle die. She couldn't do that so just like Clay she closed her eyes as she to prayed that the bullet never came.

"OPE..." Nicole's eyes shot open and she had never been so pleased to see her cousin but by the look on his face he didn't feel the same.

On his ride over on the bike he had stolen, Jax's mind had gone over the possibilities of what he would find when he eventually made it to the clubhouse but he never imagined this. Clay was sat at the head of the table, Opie was about ready to shoot, nothing that he hadn't imagined but to see Nicole being held against her will by his best friend was not something he had expected and his mind was still trying to figure out how the hell she had managed to get involved in all of this as well as how he was going to get her and Clay out of this unscathed.

"Let her go Ope..." Now that Clay was sat down Opie risked a look at Jax who had his own gun raised but instead of being pointed at Clay it was aimed at him. Only minutes ago he witnessed Clay trying to use Nicole as a shield and now he was thinking about doing the same. If the situation was different, if Nicole wasn't involved, Opie would bet on his kids life's that Jax-his best friend- would never shoot to kill him but he knew what this looked like and he knew how scared Nicole must look because he could feel her shaking against him which meant all bets were off. They always were when it came to Jax protecting Nicole. And as if he needed more proof Jax's next words told him he was right.

"Let her go..." He watched as Jax's eyes moved to Clay before looking back at him. "Put the gun down man...please don't make me kill you." Opie hated that he was putting Jax through this. Hated that he was putting him through this sort of decision. But Opie had to do this, he had to finish this with Clay. Looking away Opie fired off two shots into Clay's chest.

Nicole went rigid against him before she cried out Clay's name. Opie felt her nails digging into his wrist but he never loosened his grip.

Jax eye's bounced from Opie to Clay, he couldn't believe that Opie had actually shot him. He finally let his eyes rest back on his best who was now staring at him. Jax looked down at Nicole but her eyes were glued to Clay. All three were silent, well until a moan escaped from Clay's lips.

Jax watched as Opie's gaze left him. Jax knew he was going to shoot off another round and he couldn't let that happen. He couldn't shoot to kill, no matter if he had threatened it Jax could never kill his best friend, and he would never risk Nicole's safety, but at the same time Jax couldn't allow Opie to kill Clay either. So he pulled the trigger firing a shot in Opies arm that was pointing the gun at Clay. Opie went down his grip finally falling from Nicole and Jax wasted no time in pulling her behind him before stepping forward and sucker punching Opie, knocking him clean out onto the floor.

Nicole moved from behind Jax and went to Clay her shaking hands hovering over the fresh bullet holes, to afraid to touch him for fear of hurting him even more. "It's bad Jay..." Nicole said over her shoulder when she felt him come up behind her.

"Shit..." Jax nudged Nicole out of the way so he could get a better look. Nicole fiddled with her necklace as she watched her cousin inspect the wounds. Two bullet holes to the chest she knew the odds and they weren't good. Kozik's face flashed before her eyes.

"What the hell..." Both Nicole and Jax turned to see Rat standing in the doorway of the Chapel looking at Opie who was unconscious on the floor before looking at the two of them. "Shit..."

"Call an ambulance." Jax instructed as he turned his attention back to Clay.

"NOW..." Nicole shouted at the prospect when he just stood there. She looked back at Jax edging closer to him. "Jay is he..."

"I don't know..."

"Co...ps..." Clay mumbled gaining back both of their attention.

"Jay what did he say?"

"I don't kn..."

"Cops. Get me outside..." Clay gasped. "It..it...happened... in...th..e...ga...rage."

"Okay..." Jax nodded and looked over his shoulder at Rat who was just hanging up his cell. "Come on...help me get him to the garage." Rat nodded and was standing on the other side of Clay in a flash. "On three 1..2..3.." Nicole squeezed her eyes shut as Clay let out a groan. His pain evident. She started to follow behind them but Jax stopped and looked over his shoulder at her. "Nic you've gotta clean up the guns and blood before the cops get here...I'll come back and take care of Opie..." Jax stared at her blankness expression. She was in shock, so was he but he needed her there with him, he needed her help, they all did. "Nic..NICOLE..."

"Yeah..." Nicole answered suddenly snapping out of it.

"Guns...blood..." She looked over her shoulder at the mess before looking back at Jax.

"I've got it." Jax smiled at her before continuing outside.

* * *

Nicole stood in front of Clay. He was slumped against one of the work stations. She had never seen her Uncle look so helpless so weak. His breathing was short, deep, blood was pouring from him, out of his mouth down his arms, the amount was sickening, but Nicole couldn't seem to look away from him.

Jax shut the passenger door to the tow truck as he looked over his shoulder towards the garage. He saw Nicole just standing in front of Clay she hadn't moved from that position since she came out of the clubhouse, and he was worried if she was going to be able to handle this.

"I didn't know she was in the clubhouse, I didn't mean to scare her..." Jax shot a dirty look back at Opie who sitting in the passenger seat.

He had woken up just as Nicole was wiping up the last of the blood. Of course as soon as Opie looked at her he felt like shit. He tried to go to her, tried to apologise but Nicole backed away from him and was out of the clubhouse before he could say anything else. Jax entered seconds later and when he helped him off the floor Opie knew that his grip was rougher than usual. He was pissed, really pissed by the look on his best friends face.

"Yeah well you did." Jax bit out as he tuned away and started making his way over to Nicole.

Standing behind her he could see her shaking and he knew it wasn't because she was standing barefoot on the concrete floor in a skimpy dress and no jacket. He hated that she had to be witness to all of that especially today, she had already been through enough.

"Hey.." He said reaching out to touch her shoulder. He felt her flinch but he just held her tighter as he turned her to face him. He thought she would be crying but he was surprised to see no tears.

"You better go, Cops will be here soon..." Jax nodded knowing that she was right.

"This was black. You saw two black guys leaving the lot...that's the story.." Nicole nodded. "Told the prospect the same story." Again she nodded. He closed his eyes, his hand finding its way to the back of her head as he pulled her against him, his lips kissing her forehead. "You gonna be okay?" Again no words just a nod. This wasn't good but again Jax didn't have time to try and comfort her. Everything was just shit right now. He was halfway to the truck when he finally heard her speak. He turned round and looked at her.

"Do you think he did it?" Jax didn't need her to clarify any more he knew what she was asking and he had no clue.

"I don't know. But I promise you I'm gonna find out." Nicole gave him the smallest of smiles before she turned her back on him and went back to staring at Clay.

When Nicole heard the truck pull out of the lot she crouched down beside Clay, her hands pressing against the wounds on his chest in an attempt to try and stop the bleeding. It wasn't working. He groaned and she was surprised when his eyes fluttered open. His breathing was still short and harsh and she knew he was struggling but she had to ask him.

"Did you do it..did you kill Piney..." He never answered her and she wasn't surprised he could barely breathe let alone talk but Nicole leaned in closer when she thought she heard him trying to speak but whatever it was he was about to say, if anything, was cut off by the sound of sirens and screeching tyres entering the lot. She looked over her shoulder. Taking a deep breath she looked back at Clay. His eyes were closed now and Nicole hoped that Clay made it through this because she needed to hear it from him. She needed to hear him tell her that he didn't do this, that he didn't kill Piney.


	31. Chapter 31

Everything Changes 

Chapter Thirty One 

Nicole just wanted to scream at the man in front of her he just kept going over and over the same thing and all she wanted him to do was shut up and leave her the hell alone. As soon as Clay had been wheeled off by the paramedics Charming PD's finest hauled her aside for questioning and they hadn't stopped. Looking up from her hands, where she had buried her head she let out a sigh of relief when she finally saw Sons approaching. A quick flick of her eyes towards the two officers they understood and wasted no time in placing themselves between her and the officers giving her the opportunity to slip away...finally.

"We need to get her statement."

"You've got enough..." Tig snapped before Chibs chimed in.

"Aye da lasses Uncle has just bin shot give da girl a break." Chibs directed his comment to Candy Eglee. He figured that she used to have some relations to the club so he thought she might help them a little.

"Exactly her Uncle was shot and she is the only witness we need to speak..." Tig was done. He was already pissed off at himself for leaving Clay so his fuse was already short. Sensing the growing tension and listening to what Chibs had to say Candy lightly took hold of her fellow officers arm.

"Their right we've got enough for now." She could see he was reluctant but he did close his note pad.

"Just make sure she doesn't go anywhere."

"Get outta here..." Tig snapped. Again Candy stepped between them and directed her fellow officer away from the Sons, giving them an apologetic smile over her shoulder. "Assholes fuckin' piece of shits..." Chibs placed an hand on Tig's shoulder trying to calm his clearly raging bother. "I gotta check on Nic..."

"No ya don't brutha." Chibs knew that Tig was to fired up and would probably bombard Nicole with more questions than the coppers and judging from the quick look he managed to get of her she looked like she'd been through enough. Looking to Happy who was standing on the other side of Tig he gave him the signal.

Chibs hadn't forgot how Happy had handled Nicole after Chibs had chucked out her Fiancé and she was refusing to leave the house. Happy had walked in and no more than 5 minutes later he was walking back out with Nicole in tow, a feat that Chibs was unable to do himself. It still stunned him now but whatever the killah had done or said obviously worked so Chibs gave a flick of his head in the direction that Nicole had scurried off in. Not surprisingly Happy nodded and did as he was asked.

"I should go with him, I gotta know what happened..."

"Aye and we will..."

* * *

Nicole let her head fall against the bathroom door and she squeezed her eyes shut. Her mind hadn't stopped going over everything that had happened in the clubhouse, all she kept hearing was Opie saying that Clay had killed Piney. She knew that Piney and Clay had been butting heads, god only days ago she had gone to Piney and offered her services to try and help with this whole mess, she herself had been the one to tell Piney that Clay was losing it and she still kind of believed that but murder...Clay taking a shotgun to Piney's chest and killing him at point blank rage Nicole was still struggling to believe that.

Pushing herself from the door she walked over to the sinks. She stood in front of the sink staring at herself in the mirror and for the first time she realised that she had Clay's blood smeared on her cheek. Automatically her hand shot up to her face to try and wipe it away but in the reflection of the mirror Nicole realised that her hand was also covered in blood, looking down at her other one, she realised that that one to was covered in her Uncle's blood...She felt sick but she knew there was nothing left inside of her.

Discarding the itchy blanket the paramedics had given her-along with a pair of shoes- to the floor Nicole started filling the sink with warm water but before she could get the chance to clean Clay's blood off her hands she heard the bathroom door creek open. Looking back up at the mirror she saw Happy standing there. She swallowed hard as she turned her body to face him, her lower back resting against the now full sink.

* * *

Happy was glad when Chibs gave him the signal to after Nicole because he was going to go after her anyway this just made it easier, he didn't have to explain why he was chasing after her. Happy still wasn't done with her he had planned on going back after they were done at Galen's but Jax pretty much told them to go anywhere but the clubhouse.

Now though, although he still wanted answers to his earlier question he was worried. He'd seen the blood on her hands and face and by the sounds of it she had been there when the shooting took place. He needed to check if any of that blood covering her was hers.

Pushing open the door to the ladies' bathroom he saw her standing in front of one of the sinks, her head shooting up at him in the mirror as soon as she heard the door. And as he stared back at her he was surprised by how scared she looked. He had never seen her look this...terrified...ever.

Watching her turn to face him Happy took that as the okay and he started making his way towards her. He stood in front of her his arms folded across his chest. She stared at him straight in the eyes she was trying to be strong he could tell but her eyes betrayed her. He allowed his eyes to rake over her body, he could see dark patches on her dress. Blood stains.

As if she read his mind she told him that she was okay, unharmed. That was a relief. Now he wanted answers to his earlier question. But before he could ask it again, Nicole spoke.

"He told you didn't he. Koz." Happy nodded. Nicole just knew Kozik had told him and she had no idea how this was going to play out. With Kozik, he had been through it he had been there himself but Happy...well Happy was Happy.

"What did you take?"

"I found a prescription bottle in the main bathroom at the clubhouse. I'm not sure what they were but I took them."

"Why?"

"I don't know...Koz dying all the other shit. Guess I just didn't want to feel any of that pain any more. It was a split second decision a wrong one but it happened."

"It gonna happen again?" Nicole shook her head. She really did hope that it wouldn't happen again. But she couldn't exactly promise that no matter how much she wanted to.

"I don't want it to but..."

"Nic feeling pain just proves your alive...this drowning yourself in booze and pills..."

"I'll stop...i'll stop it all...I'm sorry... and bout that gu.. " Her words died when he moved even closer. He was so close to her that she could feel the heat coming off him. He was mad at her but right now she also knew that he was fighting to contain that anger towards her.

Happy's hands grasped the edges of the sink behind her. He didn't want to think about any other guy placing their hands on her. He had never thought of himself as the jealous type because honestly he had never been jealous, but then again he'd never had a girl to get jealous over before, not that he exactly had Nicole but seeing that guys hands on her waist Happy felt it...felt the twist in his stomach and the anger burn. He wanted to rip the guys throat out.

Nicole braced herself what about to come but was actually surprised when he kissed her.

Being so close to her and thinking about that guy Happy wanted to rip her a new one but instead found himself kissing her. He was dominant, leading the kiss forcing his tongue into her mouth. When he felt her respond, her one hand fisting in his cut as the other found its way to the back of his head pulling him against her. But before they could progress any further he abruptly pulled away although he kept the closeness.

They were both breathing hard and he loved the way she biting her freshly kissed lips, her eyes stilled locked with his. Resting his hand on her face he brushed his thumb over her cheek rubbing away the small smear of blood that rested there. He eased her around so that her back was pressed against his chest. He looked in the mirror and could see her confusion. His hands reached around her and took hold of hers.

"Let's get ya cleaned up." He rasped against her ear as he eased her hands into the warm water. Nicole smiled at him in the mirror and aloud him to wash the blood off her hands.

This was what she wanted, Happy was just what she wanted. Again he had managed to make feel safe.

* * *

Nicole wrapped the Samcro jacket Happy had given her around her body. She knew it was the same one that she had left in his bedroom because as well as smelling Happy's scent she could smell her own perfume. She smiled to herself but it was a smile that quickly faded when her and Happy rejoined the group to find Roosevelt standing there. She caught sight of Happy edging in front of her obviously going to intercept Roosevelt when he spotted her and started to move towards her. Knowing that the Sons didn't need anymore shit on their plate and the fact that Nicole could not bare the thought of Happy being locked up and leaving her alone she grabbed hold of his arm and pulled him back.

"It's okay..." She looked at Happy who had now turned to face her before looking over his shoulder at the rest of the guys. "It's fine." Pulling Happy's jacket around her even more she stepped around him and walked up to Roosevelt.

This was the first time she'd seen him since the warning she made to him and the first time she'd seen him since her talk with Juice. Nicole had no respect for this man especially since finding out that the black man in front of her was actually pulling out the race card on Juice.

"I've already given my statement." Nicole snapped.

"I know but I would like to hear it for myself what it is that happened Miss Teller. I just want to find the people that did this to your Uncle."

"Sure you do." Nicole remarked sarcastically. She knew full well that Roosevelt didn't give a shit unless he could pin this onto one of them but Nicole wasn't about to sell out Opie. She never would, even if he did try and kill Clay. He was like her brother.

"Surely you want to catch the people who did this."

"Of course I do."

"Well you won't mind if I ask you a few more questions then will you Miss Teller." Nicole just shook her. It was meant to be taken as a gesture of disgust but Roosevelt took it as a go ahead. Nicole quickly glanced over her shoulder, she saw Chibs and Tig stepping up but as she looked over her other shoulder she noticed Happy closing the gap as well, again her hand came out and stopped him as well as the other two.

"You wanna know what I saw, I saw two men who looked just like you." The bitterness and discuss was clear in her tone.

"Like me?"

"Black."

"Black?"

"Yeap. Black." Roosevelt want stupid he knew that she was having a dig at him about this shit with Juice and by the sounds of it she knew more than she had let onto him, unless her knowledge was recent. He ignored it though because her story did actually match the one that she had told to his officers earlier. But he had to make sure she wasn't just playing them all, because something about what she was saying wasn't right.

Going to take a hold of her elbow so he could discuss things with her a little more privately. He watched the 3 Sons advance towards them before he even got within touching distance of her they had successfully blocked Nicole from his touch. Roosevelt tried to play it down, even took a step back but his focus remained on Nicole.

"What about security cameras?"

"They don't record." Roosevelt locked eyes with the man he had come to know as Happy Lowman aka The Tacoma Killer. Roosevelt took a step towards him.

"That's a little convenient, don't you think."

"No. Now your done here."

"That's not for you to decide Mr Lowman." Roosevelt looked around Happy at Nicole briefly before turning his attention back towards Nicole. "But maybe your right." He again looked at Nicole. "Don't go anywhere I still have a few more questions for you Miss Teller."

They all watched as Roosevelt disappeared out of sight. Nicole turned to face Chibs and Tig. "Thanks." Again she pulled the jacket tighter around her body. She was heading for the chairs, her legs felt so heavy but before she could Tig stepped in front of her.

"So they were black?" Nicole didn't want to do this, this was what she had been dreading. Lying to the cops was one thing but lying to her family about what happened was going to be hard, but she still hadn't heard from Jax so she knew she had to keep to the story he had told her earlier. She let out a deep sigh.

"Not now Tiggy." She tried to move pass him but he blocked her path.

"I need to know Nic.." She could see the desperation in his eyes this was killing him as much as it was her. She knew how much Tig loved Clay.

"Yes they were black." She rubbed her hand over her forehead. She really didn't want to do this.

"Niners?"

"I don't know..."

"Well think Nic." Tig snapped at her as his hands came up and cupped her face. "Did you see colours?" He demanded.

"NO..no..." Nicole shouted back at him hating herself for lying to him, clearly he was hurting over all this shit.

"Back off Tigger." Happy said from over her shoulder as his hands forced Tig's off her face.

"Yeh..sorry doll...just...this is on me..."

"No." Nicole hated hearing Tig blame himself.

"Clay asked me to stay he had a feeling something was gonna go down."

"We don't know anything yet Tiggy." Chibs said hoping to ease his brothers guilt.

"No...i do. A brother asked for help and I turned my back." Tig stormed down the hall.

"Chibs you've got to stop him before he does something stupid." Nicole pleaded looking down the hall where Tig had disappeared down. "He's going to go after them." She turned back to look at both Chibs and Happy. "He can't go after the Niners."

Chibs and Happy exchanged looks both worried by Nicole's reaction and by the fact that she may be right Tig might easy go rouge on this shit and go and do something stupid that could blow back in all their faces.

* * *

Jax stepped under the hot spray off the shower. It had been a long night and his head was banging with all the information mulling around in there. He had talked to Opie last night when he dropped him at the clubs emergency center He hoped that talking to him would help him figure out why the hell Opie thought Clay had killed Piney but it actually ended up with Jax starting to believe his best friend. From what Opie told him, Clay killing Piney didn't seem so crazy.

He ran his hand over his weary face. Although Opie was making a little bit more sense to him Jax needed to be absolutely certain that Clay had done this before he brought it to the club. Because if he was wrong, if Opie was...well Jax didn't want to think about that.

Turning off the shower he grabbed the towel off the hook, wrapping it around his waist as he stepped out the shower.

"Rough night?" He turned around to see Tara sitting on the toilet clutching his bloody shirt. The look on her face told Jax this wasn't going to be easy, and he really wasn't up for this right now.

"Clay got shot last night. He's in a critical condition at St. Thomas." He told her as he lent against the sink.

"Who did it?" Normally they lived by the full discourse rule but Tara wasn't in the right head space right now, and he had no idea what she would do if he told her that Opie was the one who pulled the trigger so as much as he didn't want to, he lied to her.

"I don't know." He watched her roll her eyes and he knew what she was thinking. "I'm still getting out Tara. Deal with the Irish goes down today."

"And then what?"

"And then I put my damn family in a car and drive the hell out of Charming." Of course he had to check in with Nicole, he was even thinking about asking her to come with them. Yesterday he thought she would be safe here with his brother but now he wasn't sure. Fist Happy pinned her to a wall and now this shit with Clay he didn't like the thought of leaving her behind although he wasn't going to mention that bit to Tara yet, he could tell she was pissed at him, pissed at everything at the minute.

"Just like that Jax." And there was the anger. "Change your clothes wash off the blood..." Sarcasm clear in her tone.

"Yeah Tara just like that." He crouched down in front of her. "Look I know this shit aint gonna be easy, i'm not delusional but I also know your not thinking clear right now."

"I'd argue. I'm the clearest I've ever been."

"Trust me babe, rage feels that way. Have Phil and Neeta help you pack. I'll be back tonight."

"Yeah okay." Jax could tell she still didn't believe him. Jax stood back up and headed for the door only stopping when he heard Tara's voice. "Jax tell me you love me." She wasn't looking at him and that worried him a little so did her question.

"I love you Tara. Do you love me?"

"If I could stop I would." Tara got to her feet and finally looked at him. "I love you Jackson." Her voice was barely audible and before Jax could say or do anything Tara walked out the bathroom.

He ran his hand over his face he was right he really didn't need that.

* * *

Walking towards the waiting room Jax walked over to where Chibs and Happy were sitting with two prospects. Jax looked again and wondered where Nicole was.

"Where is she?" Chibs got to his feet.

"Gone ta get coffee."

"How's Clay doin'?"

"Gone back in ta surgery problem wit his lungs."

"God damn cigars." Happy added as Jax gave him a quick look.

"Shit. You heard from Bobby or Juice?" Chibs ushered Jax away from the prying ears of the prospects. Happy followed them.

"Nothin' on Juice, hopefully he's off on one of his joy rides. We ave bigger problems. Talked ta Lowen 'pparently Bobby signed in ta Stockton but didn't sign out."

"What the hell does that mean?" Jax asked.

"Maybe Lenny can tell us. He wants a sit down wit yer today."

"Yeah okay."

"Opie and Tig are MIA to."

"Ope's at the cabin checkin' on Piney. Tig's so twisted up with this Clay shit he's probably neck deep in cold pussy." He said to Happy before turning back to Chibs. Who was now motioning his head over Jax's shoulder. Turning his head Jax saw that Nicole had joined the prospects.

"She's worried bout da Tig, kept sayin' dat we couldn't let 'im go after da Niners." _Shit. _Jax knew that this may be a possibility.

"Al'right Chibs you try Tig and Juice again. I want them here." Jax instructed looking back at Chibs. He nodded pulled at his cell and headed down the hall. Jax then turned his attention to Happy. His eyes leaving his for a moment to look at Nicole again. She looked tired and she still had that glint of fear in her eyes.

"You got your shit in check when it comes to my cousin, your not going to be slammin' her against anymore doors?" Happy could hear the attitude in Jaxs voice it was clear that his VP was pissed at him and although he probably had good reason Happy had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop him from retaliating. He just nodded instead. "Good. Cos she needs to go home and I've gotta go to Stockton. I want you on her. Don't let her out of your sight. I'm trustin' you here don't let me down."

"I won't."

"Al'right. Give me a minute with her."

Nicole watched as Jax talked with Happy, there was something about the way both their shoulders were squared that told her that both men were pissed. Jax had witnessed what Happy had done to her yesterday, and although he hadn't actually hurt her she knew that it probably didn't look that way to Jax or anyone else for that matter.

Taking a sip of her coffee she was glad to see the two reach some sort of agreement on something before they were both heading towards her.

"Hey." She spoke as she watched Happy walk over to the chairs taking a seat.

"Can I have a minute?" Jax asked. Nicole nodded her head she was dying to talk to him. She was dying to know what Opie had said. She followed Jax into the chapel located just down the hall.

"What did Opie say?" Nicole asked as soon as the door closed behind them.

"He's adamant that Clay did this. Said Unser and Gemma knew about it. Gemma begged Unser to make it look like a cartel hit." Nicole took a seat on the bench an exasperated sigh leaving he mouth. Clay killing Piney may be one thing but hearing that Unser and Gemma could have had a hand in this made her sick.

"Where is he?"

"Dropped him off at the emergency care place of at Crane. Lyla's picking him up."

"So what happens now?" Jax came to stand next to the bench she was sitting on. He didn't want to do this now especially considering all the shit she already had on her plate but he couldn't leave it any longer.

"I'm gonna get to the bottom of this. But I've gotta do it by the end of today." Nicole looked up at him.

"Why?" Jax crouched down beside her.

"We've got a meet set with the Irish today but when that's done I'm out Nic..."

"Out?"

"I'm taking Tara and the boys and we're leaving Charming."

"Leaving..." Nicole tried to understand what he meant, if he just meant leaving for a bit, getting the kids out, but as she looked into her cousin eyes she knew that he meant that they were all leaving and by the sounds of it, it was for good. "You can't."

"I have to Nic. Tara the boys I need to get them out of this."

"And what about me?" He reached out and took hold of her hand in his.

"You can come with us. You don't have to stay here."

"I'm not gonna just abandon my family Jay." Nicole snapped pulling her hand out of his. "What happens if you don't get this shit with Clay figured out by the end of the day, what happens if you do? You just going to leave everyone else to pick up the pieces?"

"I have to start thinking about my family Nic..."

"This club is your family Jay." Jax sighed heavily. He knew that she wouldn't take it to well and maybe if he had told her his plans from the start she would have taken it better than she was now. He couldn't blame her for reacting like this especially now. "I get you want out Jay I all of people understand needing to put distance between yourself and the club, but now..."

"Tara needs this."

"And what about what everyone else needs."

"Nic I can't keep doing this I can't keep putting my family at risk. Come with us Nic." Nicole jumped to her feet.

"No. I've done all my running Jay." She went to storm out but Jay managed to catch hold of her of wrist before she made it out.

"Nic, please don't be like this."

"Its okay Jay, you do what you've got to do, what Tara wants you to do. And i'll do what I have to do."

"What does that mean?"

"That's not your problem anymore." Nicole freed her wrist from his hold and stormed out of the Chapel.

She knew that she was being hypocritical, she had run away more than once but Jax was the VP of this club and he was going to bail on her, on everyone when they needed him the most. And Nicole knew this had Tara written all over, no one could twist up her cousin like Tara and that was exactly what she was doing. She had never wanted to be apart of Samcro never wanted it as her life. And now finally she had managed to get Jax to agree. Nicole was not about to sit back and let this happen.


	32. Chapter 32

Wow thank you soooooooo much for all the reviews. None of my stories from this saga has reached the 100 mark for reviews before. It's hard to believe it considering I almost abandoned this story. It's so nice to know that all my hard work to try and get this story finished is appreciated, so again thank you.

And of course to all those who are just reading, thank you, this story wouldn't be much without all you lovely readers reading it.

Enjoy xxx

Everything Changes 

Chapter Thirty Two

As soon as Nicole hit the parking lot she remembered that she didn't actually have any transport to get her out of this place. _Fuck. _She didn't even have a phone to call a cab. She'd have to walk because she couldn't go back inside she didn't want to talk to Jax again.

She felt like shit she shouldn't have walked away from him, shouldn't have put the guilt trip on him but his timing just couldn't be any more worse. He was going to be gone by the end of the day no matter what meaning she was going to be left to pick up the pieces with Clay and Opie because as far as she knew she was the only one aside from Jax that knew about Opie shooting Clay. And from what Jax had told her Opie was still adamant that Clay had done this, that Clay had killed Piney meaning Opie was in no way about to give up, he would keep going until Clay was dead. How was she supposed to stop that. She couldn't do any of this without Jax.

Making her was across the parking lot she made it halfway down the street before she heard the rumble of the Harley approaching her. She had a pretty good idea who it was and when he rode passed her and pulled in by the curb she was proved right.

"Hey." He said as he handed her the helmet.

"Hi." Nicole took the helmet from Happy and put it on. She noticed his eyes leave hers and trail down her body. She had to laugh to herself she knew exactly what he was thinking. Stepping up to his bike she playfully slapped his arm. "Perv." She remarked as she started hiking her skirt up to near her ass. Happy just let out a laugh and Nicole had to admit it was nice to hear considering everything that was going on.

"Where we goin'?"

"Jay's house."

* * *

Happy parked in the driveway of Jax's house. He wasn't exactly sure what had gone on between Nicole and Jax but considering the way she had skipped out the hospital and the urgency in Jax's voice when he asked him to go after her it was clear the two had had a fight about something. But now she was here and although he didn't think it was the best idea Happy knew that Nicole had to do whatever it was she had come here to do.

Nicole let herself in the house and looked around spotting Phil at the kitchen table with Thomas sitting on his lap. She smiled and walked over to the two making sure she shut the door behind her.

"Hey little man." Nicole reached out and ran her hand over Thomas' hair causing the little boy to look up at her. She blew him a little kiss before looking at Phil. "Where's Tara at?"

"In her bedroom." Nicole bent down and kissed the top of Thomas' head before saying her thanks to Phil and walking down the hall to Tara and Jax's room. She stopped in the doorway for a moment watching as Tara attempted to pack her and Jax's things one handed. Taking a deep breath to try and keep herself calm Nicole knocked lightly on the door.

"Hey, can I come in?" Tara, who was now looking at her nodded her head before returning her attention back to her packing. Nicole rolled her eyes to herself as she took a seat at on the edge of the bed. "So Jay wasn't lying your really leaving by the end of the day, huh?"

Tara tried to keep he focus on the packing. By the sound of it Jax had told her they were leaving -which was a good a thing, if he had told Nicole it was official-Tara knew that Nicole would have something to say on the matter. And it probably wasn't going to be anything good.

"Look T, I don't wanna be the bitch here." Nicole ignored the huff Tara made. "But you and Jay leaving it's not a good time." Tara slammed the lid of the case shut.

"When would be a good time Nicole, when you and Gemma say so."

"I don't mean it like that. It really is up to you and Jay..."

"Really, because it doesn't sound like it." Tara turned to face her and Nicole had never seen her this pissed off in a long time. Nicole wanted to just try and talk to her hopefully make her understand that this was not the time to be leaving, she also wanted to try and do this without it turning into a major argument.

"Did Jay tell you about Clay getting shot?"

"If you think that is going to make us stay..."

"Did he?" Nicole asked again butting in.

"Yes."

"Did he tell you Opie did it?" When Tara froze Nicole got her answer.

"Opie why?"

"That doesn't matter, what does matter is that he did. Jay can't leave right now. This shit between Opie and Clay it's..."

"It's not our problem. It's not Jax's."

"Yes it is Tara and just because of the Club, but because Opie is his best and he needs Jay right now but he's willing to leave his best friend because of you."

"This isn't on me Nicole don't you dare blame me for this. And your really one to talk about running away."

"Your right when things get hard I run it's what I do, which means I also know what a mistake it is. Running doesn't solve anything T." Nicole got to her feet. "Now I know you've never really wanted this life and I understand that it's not for everyone, it's hard but you want Jay, right? Well I'm sorry Tara but this is Jay's life and no matter how far or how long you run for he will always come back just like I did, have. This is our life and right now this is where Jay is needed."

"No..No..." Tara shook his head. "Jax is mine not yours he loves me." Tara shouted.

"I never said he wasn't yours or that he didn't love you Tara."

"Tell me you love me..." Nicole furrowed her brows. The request seemed completely out of the blue and Nicole wasn't sure what to say. She had a love hate relationship with Tara. She would always put up with her because Jax loved her and she was the mother to his children but right now Nicole couldn't answer her question.

"I love Jay and I respect the love he has for you but at the end of the day he is my priority. I'm sorry T." Nicole turned her back on her and was heading for the door before she turned back around to face Tara who hadn't moved or stopped staring at her. "Please just think about what I've said." Nicole turned back around and left.

Happy lent against his bike smoking a cigarette while he waited for Nicole. He had only been there for 5 minutes when he heard the car pulling into the street and a quick glance told Happy that it was Gemma. He rubbed the back of his neck, this was just what he needed. It was no secret that a Samcro woman or any woman connected to the inside of the club had to be a strong one. And although Tara, Nicole and Gemma all had their weaknesses, weak moments, they were strong to the core and could handle pretty much any shit that came their way, but put them together, pit them against one another it was never going to be pretty. And that was exactly what Happy thought was about to happen.

Jax was the catalyst here, all three women loved him maybe in three very different ways but loved him never the less. From what he could make out Jax and Nicole had fought and Nicole had come here to talk to Tara meaning that the fight Nicole had with Jax probably had something to do with Tara. That was a bad enough combination but now Gemma was pulling up and there was noway Gemma could not get involved with whatever it was that was going on inside between Jax's Old Lady and Jax's cousin. This was going to get messy but if Happy was being honest with himself although he would put his life on the line to protect any one of those three women, right now his top priority was making sure Nicole got out of the line of fire.

"Gemma." Happy said as the Queen approached him. An intrigued look on her face.

"Jackson send you?" Happy was about to answer when both of them were distracted by the sound of the front door opening and closing. "Oh I see." Gemma remarked at Happy upon seeing her niece walking towards him. "Hey baby, everything okay?"

Gemma's eyes landed over Nicole's shoulder on the house behind her and that just pissed Nicole off even more. Her talk with Tara had gone worse than she expected, not that she expected it to go well really. And now she had Gemma looking at her like she had just done something terrible which was rich coming from her if what Opie had said to Jax was the truth, which Nicole was starting to believe it was. Nicole didn't want to deal with Gemma and she didn't intend to.

"Yeah." Nicole shot coldly at Gemma before looking at Happy. "Will you take home?"

"Yeah." Happy's eyes bounced between the two women as he straddled his bike. Grabbing the helmet ready to hand it to Nicole.

"Tara okay?"

"Why don't you go and see for yourself." Nicole sassed as she took the helmet from Happy and climbed on the bike behind him.

"You okay?"Gemma didn't like the attitude Nicole was giving, Christ Nicole could barely even look at her and that wasn't like her.

"I'm perfect Gem, why wouldn't I be?" She wrapped her arms around Happy's taught mid section. "Take me home." She whispered as she rested her head against his shoulder.

Gemma watched her niece dive away with a uneasy feeling in pit of her stomach. When Gemma had visited the hospital briefly to check on Clay Nicole had been fine even offered her some support but now...now she was being cold with her and Gemma couldn't help but wonder what had caused this change of attitude in her Niece. Turning to face the house behind her after Nicole and Happy disappeared around the corner Gemma started making her way inside to see if Tara could shed a little light on Nicole's behavior.

* * *

Tara knew it she had said it all along Nicole was going to be the one to stop her from getting her family out of Charming, well over her dead body was she going to let Nicole ruin this. She didn't care what Nicole said Jax was hers.

Turning her attention back to the suitcase she opened it again and continued packing when she heard movement at the door. Tara prayed it wasn't Nicole but as she turned her head and saw Gemma standing in doorway she didn't feel any better.

"Are you the good cop or the bad cop?" Tara asked stopping her packing and giving her full attention to Gemma.

"So you and Nicole did have it out then?" Tara cocked her brow.

"Like you didn't send her."

"I didn't actually." Gemma unfolded her arms and walked further into the room towards Tara. "So what did she have to say?" Tara shook her head and went back to packing. It was already going to take her longer because she had to do with one hand, if she kept getting interrupted she was never going to get it done and Tara just wanted out of this town as quickly as possible. "Whatever it was it doesn't seem to have made much difference." Gemma said referring to the fact that she was still packing. "She tell you Clay was shot last night?" Tara nodded. "She tell who did it?"

"Yes, and like I told her it doesn't change things. Me and Jax are still leaving Gemma." Gemma suddenly had a little bit more insight now as to why Nicole was being off with her. If she knew about Opie there was a good chance she knew about Piney and maybe even Clay. Gemma would defiantly have to try and do some damage control with her. But first she had to do some other kind of damage control.

"She tell you why?"

"Gemma it doe..."

"Clay killed Piney."

"What?" Tara asked turning towards Gemma again. "Why?"

"Because Clay thought Piney had the letters."

"No Piney didn...he never even saw them."

"I know but Clay will do anything to stop that truth from leaking out. Does Nicole know about the letters?" Tara shook her head as she took a seat on the edge of the bed. "Good." Gemma took a seat next to her. "Clay is dangerous, he's the one that tried to kill you Tara. He hired those men who came after you."

"How do you know that?"

"He took money out of our safe to pay them off. I confronted him. That's why he did this." Gemma motioned to her bruised face. "Clay will keep on hurting everything and everyone that gets in his path until he gets those letters."

"He threatened me yesterday. Told me that me and Jax will never make it out of Charming if I didn't give them to him."

"He's read them he knows how dangerous they are. Where are the letters Tara. I'll give them to Clay put this to bed. I'm out of options. This may be the only way we get out alive."

"And if we do that get out alive. Then you know Jax and I are leaving."

"I know."

"And you won't try and stop us."

"No."

"And you'll stop Nicole."

"Was she trying to stop you from leaving?" Gemma asked. It surprised her because she remembered when their opinions were reversed and it was Nicole who was telling Gemma that she couldn't stop Jax and Tara leaving. She looked at Tara still waiting for an answer until she realised that she wasn't going to get one. "I'll talk to her." Tara nodded and got to her feet opening the top draw to the dresser.

"There in the storage unit at the back under a stash of boxes, T/M receipts."

"Okay." Gemma accepted the keys Tara was handing her and started heading out the door.

"Gemma." Gemma looked over her shoulder. "Tell me you love me."

"I love you Tara."

* * *

"Drink?" Nicole asked Happy as they walked into the kitchen of Clay and Gemma's house. He shook his head. "Me either." Her back rested against the kitchen counter her arms folding across her chest as she stared at the man in front of her.

"You a'right?" He asked moving across the kitchen to come and stand in front of her.

No. That was the answer, Nicole was not okay, everything was upside down right now and she had no idea how to make it all okay. But as she looked into those dark eyes of his Nicole did know one thing that would make her feel better if only for a short time. She needed to feel how only he could make her feel. She needed to feel untouchable like nothing more could hurt her.

Taking a step forward, her hands cupped the sides of his face as she lent onto he tiptoes and pressed her lips to his. She edged closer pressing her lips harder to his before he stopped her. He wrapped his strong hands around her wrists as he pulled his lips from hers.

"What are you doin'?" Happy had no problem fucking her he'd been dying to fuck her ever since she'd walked into the clubhouse in that fucking black dress, but he wasn't a complete asshole. The last 24 hours had been hard on her and she had already made one stupid decision Happy didn't want her to make another.

"I'm reinstating our little arrangement." She went to go and kiss him again but Happy pulled his head back further. "You don't want to?" Nicole questioned as she landed back onto the balls of her feet. Happy still holding on to her wrists.

"Oh I wanna kid, trust me..."

"Then what's the problem?"

"You sure you wanna do this?"

"Yes I want this..." She stepped closer, her body pressing against his. "And you want this so..."

Happy's will power was disappearing fast. He looked into her eyes. She wasn't drunk or high in fact all he could see in her eyes was want and still that small glint of fear. That was it for him. His lips crashed down on hers, he let go of both her wrists and wrapped his arms around her small waist as she flung her arms around his neck her nails tickling his skin. He pushed her against the counter, his arms unwrapping from around her.

His lips moved to her neck as she moved her head allowing him access. He heard Nicole gasp as he allowed his hands to inch up under the hem of her dress. Getting to his knees he pushed the hem further up her slender thighs, he let out an appreciative groan when he caught a glimpse of the black lace panties she was wearing. Fuck he loved black lace especially on her.

Nicole was right this was exactly what she needed, no one except Happy made her feel like this. Her back arched when his hands ran up her thighs and she couldn't stop the small moan escaping from her lips. He kissed the top of each of her thighs as well as sliding his tongue across her bare skin. She was so ready to have him so she ran her hand over his shaved head, her finger continuing running down the side of his face where she hooked a finger under his chin making him look up at her.

"Take me to bed..." He smirked at her before kissing his way up her body till he was standing up straight staring straight into her eyes.

"Sure thing kid." He kissed her hard and then grabbed her thighs hoisting her off the floor. Nicole wrapped her legs around his firm body.

"Thank you." She whispered before kissing him hard.

* * *

Tig sat in the stolen car watching Laroy who was just sitting down with his girl at the restaurant across the street. He didn't care what everyone thought, didn't care that they wanted to wait. Clay's shooters were black, Nicole the only one to get a glimpse of the guys said so and Nicole wouldn't bullshit about something like this, not where her family was concerned she, just like the rest of them, was a firm believer in retaliation.

He didn't want to wait and discuss it at the table by the time they had done that Laroy could have gone underground meaning Clay wouldn't be avenged and that did not sit well with Tig. He had failed Clay once he wasn't going to do it again.

* * *

Nicole pulled a beer and a bottle of water out of the fridge. Capping the lid off the beer she turned on her feet intending to head back to the bedroom where she had left a very naked Happy only to come to a stop when she saw a now fully dressed Happy walking down the hall towards her. She knew this was a condition of their arrangement but still she couldn't stop herself from feeling a little disappointed to see him ready to leave already.

Happy saw it. He could tell she was trying to hide it but he saw the disappointment grace her face momentarily when she saw him. He knew it was because he was dressed and ready to go and he also knew that the disappointment was coming from the fact that she didn't want him to leave. And given the choice he would still be lying naked in her bed waiting her return because seeing her standing in front of him wearing just his hooded jacket and those god damn lace panties that made her ass look amazing, he was more than ready to take her again. But duties called and the club had to come first- although right now it was a pretty close call- he couldn't just abandon Tig even if the idiot had brought this new pile of shit onto himself.

Closing the gap between them in a few short strides Happy took the beer she was holding in his hand-he was glad to see the water in her other hand-he took a long pull from the beer, his eyes never leaving her even if she wasn't looking at him but at her feet instead.

"Gotta go. Tig needs help." Her head shot up at that point.

"Help, why..." She watched him take another swig of his beer. He didn't want to tell, she got that they be fucking but she wasn't his Old Lady meaning she wasn't privy to club shit but she didn't need to be privy she didn't need him to tell her because she knew exactly what kind of trouble Tig had got himself into and she couldn't help but feel guilty. "He went after Laroy didn't he and he fucked up, something went wrong."

"Yeah." Happy admitted pulling the beer from his lips.

"Shit."

"Don't worry we ain't gonna let him get hurt." He drained what was left of his beer. Brushing past her he placed the empty bottle on the counter. When he moved back he made sure he was standing in front of her. Her eyes were glued to him and it made him smirk cockily, she wanted him. He rested his hand in her hip and pulled her close as he kissed her. His thumb skimmed over her hip as he his rested his head against hers. "Stay outta trouble a'right." Nicole nodded. And then with one more brief kiss he was gone.

* * *

After a quick shower where she hadn't stopped thinking about Happy's goodbye kiss because it was a thing they had never done. Well of course they'd kissed but never as a parting, it was to...it was weird not a bad weird..just weird. Nicole dried her hair roughly before changing into a pair of ripped skinny jeans a baggy v-neck white t-shirt and of course Happy's jacket. For what she was about to go and do she wanted a little comfort with her.

Grabbing the keys to Jax's old pickup and her bag Nicole walked out the house. She hoped that he was in because she really needed to have this talk with him.

25 minutes later of impatient driving Nicole stepped out of the pickup closing the door behind her as she looked around. His truck was parked there so Nicole gathered he must be in.

Knocking on the trailer door she tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear while she waited for him to answer. Thankfully it didn't take long.

"Hello sweetheart." Unser greeted in surprise he didn't expect to see Nicole of all people gracing his doorstep.

"Hey Unser." He brows furrowed, his gut was screaming at him that something wasn't right with her.

"You okay sweetheart?"

"No." Nicole answered honestly. "Can I come in?"

"Sure..Sure.." Unser stepped aside letting her in. "So what can I do for ya darlin'?"

"Well maybe you could start by explaining why you and Gemma tried to cover up the fact that Clay killed Piney." Nicole said with a straight face.

Unser should have known this was why she was here. He motioned behind her to take a seat as he took one of his own.

"So how much do you want to know?"

"All of it."


	33. Chapter 33

Hey, so thanks for all the reviews and adds it's been so overwhelming, I still can't believe this story is over the 100 mark on reviews. (sorry I'll stop going on about that now hehe)

Anyway so this is the second to last chapter. It is heavily related to the show and it's kind of a stepping stone to the final chapter which I should hopefully upload on Sunday. The last chapter is pretty much done it just needs a few things ironing out.

Thanks again, love you all. Enjoy xx

Everything Changes 

Chapter Thirty Three

Gemma stood outside the chapel doors of the clubhouse. After getting the letters from the storage unit and after removing any letters that incriminated her Gemma got into her SUV and intended to drive to the clubhouse to give Jax the letters, but instead she found herself driving towards . She had no idea why but she had to see Clay.

Unfortunately Clay wasn't alone. Tig was sat in the chair next to his bed. Through the MC grape vine Gemma had heard that Tig was blaming himself for Clay getting shot and that he had single handily gone after Laroy, who he believed to be responsible. She hated that all this shit was bleeding over everyone. And it was in that moment that Gemma realised that she shouldn't have come. Clay couldn't be saved, he was poisonous and he was the one who was tearing the club she had worked so hard to create apart.

That was why she was standing outside the chapel doors clutching the brown leather bound folder that contained the letters that had started this whole mess. Jax was sitting on the other side of the doors in front of her, completely oblivious to what she was about to drop on him. But Jax needed to read the letters because Jax was the only who could end this now.

Finally opening the door she stepped inside to see Jax sat in his usual chair with papers laid in front of him. She couldn't help but think how much like John he looked right now.

Jax looked up to see his mother enter. He lent back in his chair. Since talking to Opie he had been trying to catch up with her.

"Take a seat." He motioned to the chair across from him. When Gemma was seated he continued. "What happened to Piney?"

"Clay killed him."

"Look I know Clay and Piney were beefing over this cartel shit..."

"Wasn't over the Cartel." Gemma slid the brown folder across the table towards him. "It was over these." Jax picked up the folder pulling out the contents. "Maureen Ashby stashed them in your bag before we left Belfast. There letters from your father." Jax looked up from the papers at his mother as she continued to talk. "Tara found them."

"Tara had these...why didn't she tell me?"

"She knew they would break your heart. Same way they did mine." Gemma paused for a long moment just watching as Jax scanned over the letters. This was something she never thought she would have to voice especially to her Son.

"When Thomas died your dad stopped going to Belfast. Started writing to Maureen."

"What does this have to do with Clay?" Jax asked placing the letters on the table.

"JT and Kellan decided to get the MC outta guns, away from the IRA. Clay thought it was a mistake he was afraid John would destroy the club, so he decided to kill him. The first time he sent John into a Mayan ambush, unprotected, your Dad made it out. Second time Clay cut the brake line on that old pickup he had, Nicole was with him..."

"I remember that..." Jax spoke almost subconsciously. He remembered going to the hospital with Gemma. Neither Nicole or his Dad were that badly but he remembered his Dad being furious. Until now he never knew why. "The accident, his bike..."

"Yes. The only person your father let work on his bike was Lowell Senior. Clay must have got to him. He was the only one who could have sabotaged the Pan Head."

"Lowell Senior was killed a week later by the Mayans."

"Yeah, Clay buried the secret." Jax ran a hand over his hair he couldn't believe any of what he was hearing. It was too much.

"How do you know all of this?"

"Those letters. The speculation, the Mayan ambush, the accident with Nicole. John knew Clay would kill him, it's all in there, and Clay knew that. He knew those letter could destroy him." Suddenly it clicked with Jax.

"Piney got a hold of these."

"He must have threatened Clay."

"Oh my god.."

"That's not all...I found the cover letter Maureen wrote telling you to read them. It was in your house. I knew Tara was the one who found them, I panicked. I told Clay."

"Clay knew that Tara had these." Gemma could see the anger building in her son. She took a moment before delivering the last blow.

"He tried to kill her...That thing that happened in the park, that wasn't the Cartel. That was guys Clay hired to kill your wife Jax." Jax almost jumped out of his seat, his anger taking over him. Clay tried kill his future wife, he was going to kill him.

"How did you get them?" His tone angered.

"Tara gave them to me. Don't be upset with her, she didn't want you to read them, she didn't know what you might do."

"Why are you tell me this Mom? Why now?"

"Because I know how dangerous secrets can be, and it's time we all knew the truth...Clay Morrow killed your father." She glanced to the head of the table. "He stole that seat away from our family. Gunned down your fathers best friend. Almost got Nicole killed, tried to kill your wife. He's a murderous traitor. And there's only one thing to do now for your father, your family, your club. It's in you, it's who you are. Clay has to die." Gemma watched her son as her words began to sink in. She got to her feet. "Read them. See it in your father own hand." She said as she walked around the table to him. "And then you kill him Jax. You kill Clay before he's on his feet and strikes first. And when it's done you take your place at the head of this table, where a Teller belongs. Where you belong." Leaving him to digest all of what she had said Gemma left the Chapel and headed outside to wait for her Son.

Jax read through all of the letters and it just proved that everything his mother had just told him was true. It was all there in front of him in black and white. Clay killed his father. He stubbed out the rest of his cigarette in the now over flowing ashtray. Sliding the letters back into the brown leather folder he got to his feet. He had to go and find Tara, then he had to go and see Clay.

* * *

Unser pulled his truck into T/M. He started heading for the clubhouse when he spotted Gemma sitting at one of the tables outside. Changing direction he started heading towards her. Gemma already looked like she had the weight of the world on her shoulders and he knew he was about to add to it.

"Wayne what ar...what is it?" Gemma asked registering the worried look on the old mans face.

"Nicole here?"

"No why? What's going on Wayne?"

"She came to see me. Asked me why we tried to cover up Piney's murder."

"Shit.." Gemma pulled a joint out of he bag. She knew something was off with Nicole. She should have stooped her from leaving Tara's with Happy, she should have made Nicole tell her what was wrong that way she might have been able to contain this shit, god knows what Unser had said. But she was going to find out. "What did you tell her?"

"The truth...after everything that girls been through she deserves that." Unser told her authoritatively as he took a seat at the table with her.

"Did you tell her about the letters?" Gemma inhaled her joint deeply as she waited for the answer.

"Some..."

"Some...what does that mean?" Gemma lent further across the table. "You either told her or you didn't."

"I told her the truth about Piney. Did you know she was there when Opie tried to kill Clay?"

"No I didn't." Gemma took another drag. "So the letters?"

"I started telling her about the letters JT wrote to Maureen and his ill feelings towards Clay his suspicions, but before I could go into anymore details she was out of the door, she's a smart girl I don't think she needed to hear anymore. I figured she came here looking for Jax. I had to tell her Gemma. I'm sorry."

"Doesn't matter anyway."

"What does that mean?"

"Jax has the letters. He's reading them now."

"Jesus Christ..."

"Don't worry we're protected." Both of them looked out into the lot when the heard a car door shutting. Gemma wasn't surprised to see Tara walking towards them.

"You got a minute?" Tara asked. Unser quickly made his excuses and left the two women alone. "I've been waiting for you." Tara said joining Gemma at the table.

"I know."

"Where are the letters, you bring them to Clay?"

"No."

"How many did you take out before you gave them to Jax?" Gemma cocked her head as she looked at Tara. _The little bitch knew._

"If you knew why did you give them to me?"

"Because I'm smarter than you are Gemma, and I know Jax better than you do."

The clubhouse door slammed shut and both women looked to see Jax approaching them, he looked pissed and both of them swallowed hard both hoping that their games had worked.

He walked over to the table and pulled out a chair staring at Tara. Jax couldn't stop himself from being a little pissed at Tara. She had had these letters the whole damn time and not once did she even give him a hint that she had them. Plus she put herself in danger. She had been stupid, she should have trusted him.

"You should have told me."

"I was going to. When you got out you were just so eager to leave, I was afraid that it would push you back in. I'm sorry."

"I have to kill him Tara."

"I know." Tara pulled out a small bag from her handbag and slid it across the table. "And this is how you do it." Jax looked across the table to his mother who looked just as shocked as he was, before he grabbed the bag. Inside was a syringe filled with a clear liquid. "It's a blood thinner inject it into his IV line and pull the tube from his chest. He'll bleed into his lungs and drown. It will happen quick it will just look like pulled the tube out in his sleep."

Jax looked at Tara the woman he loved. He never expected her to say this to him to give him the equipment to kill Clay. It wasn't right and it certainly didn't feel right.

"JACKEY... TIME FOR THE MEET." Chibs calls interrupted the three of them before anything else could be said. Jax got to his feet sliding the package Tara had given him inside his cut. Tara was at his side, her hand fisting his cut. And even though he was so confused right now Jax couldn't help but pull her closer.

"You kill him and then you come and get me and our boys and drive us out of this poisonous town."

"I will." Jax promised nodding his head before he lent down and kissed her. "I promise." He whispered pulling his lips from hers.

"What are you doing?" Gemma asked Tara once Jax was out of ear shot.

"Everything you taught me." Tara grabbed her bag and placed it on her shoulder before looking Gemma directly in the eyes. "He's mine."

* * *

Roosevelt had been waiting for this since he'd been giving the task of becoming the Sheriff of Charming PD, he should be feeling excited, a swell of pride in his chest because he was about to put not only Samcro behind bars but the Gallindo Cartel and the Kings of the IRA as well. It should be a good day, a great day even but for some reason Roosevelt had a bitter taste in his mouth.

Of course he wanted this but the way Linc Potter had gone around things, the way he had made him do things that he wouldn't normally do, underhand things wasn't right and it wasn't sitting well with him. If he was going to put these men behind bars he wanted to do it the right way. Hearing the eruption of claps around him Roosevelt focused his attention back on Linc Potter. He may feel the way he did but he knew he could do nothing about it now, things had gone to far.

Twenty minutes later Roosevelt found himself standing at Linc Potter side watching the Sons and the Three Kings on the laptop in front of them. It all seemed to be falling into place, they were just waiting for the Cartel to arrive and as soon as they caught them dealing illegally, they were good to go.

"We expecting anyone else to join us." Linc Potters under detective said to the both of them. Both Roosevelt and Linc turned to see the SUV parking up as two men in suits got out of the car and started walking towards them with their badges held out in front of them. CIA.

All three men knew that this investigation was now over.

* * *

"Where's Clay?" Galen asked as he stood in the warehouse with Jax and the Cartel.

"He got shot." Galen looked over to his guys before looking back at Jax.

"What happened?"

"We're not sure yet. They hit him at the garage. Had nothing to do with this." Jax added for good measure. He knew that the Irish Kings weren't to sold on the Cartel deal.

"Dares bin a problem brewin' in Oakland. Black thing." Chibs added.

"He gonna live?" Galen asked.

"Yeah. Yeah he's pulled through the worst of it." Looking over his shoulder Jax motioned towards Romeo. "This is Romeo Parada." The two men exchanged a handshake. "And this is his associate Luis Torez." Another set of handshakes were exchanged.

"When will Clay be back on his feet?"

"It's hard to say right now. We're up to speed on schedules and routes right now so we'll be able to talk you through everything."

"No you won't. I made it very clear to Clay. The only way this deal happens is if he's the one running it."

"Galen we run things as a club. We can make this work without Clay."

"It's not just about makin' it work. It's about trust and I have little in you and even less in them." Galen glanced at Romeo and Luis. "When Clay is back at the table we can discuss this deal until then there is none."

"GALEN.." Jax shouted after them as the three kings walked out of the warehouse. He felt Chibs grab his arm stopping him from going after them.

"Jackey..leave it. You'll make it worse dese stupid bastards won't hear ya."

"We have to talk." Jax turned round to face Romeo. "Alone."

When everyone was cleared out, leaving just Jax, Luis and Romeo inside the warehouse the doors were closed giving the three more privacy.

"Look I'm sorry, we really thought we could pull this off, truth is were in over our heads. I know Clay thought we could make this work but we can't..."

"Then we have a problem." Luis butted in.

"We need this deal to go ahead." Romeo added.

"You just heard Galen he won't deal with me."

"Then you better make sure Clay gets well and soon because if you don't..." Romeo looked away from Jax and over at Luis who was standing beside him. He gave him a nod and the man handed Romeo a folder. "Then she goes inside for a very long time." Romeo warned extending the folder out towards Jax.

Jax was already feeling confused with everything that had happened at the clubhouse earlier but as he accepted the folder from Romeo and scanned over the contents inside he felt himself become even more confused.

"What is this?" Jax asked as he continued looking over the contents of the folder.

"It's everything we have on her. It's enough to put her away for a long time especially with the murder she committed." Jax's eyes shot from the pages to Luis. "Turn the page." Jax did as Luis said and turned the page.

"Shit.." He muttered breathlessly as he stared at the picture in front of him. He turned the page again and scanned over the information written on it. None of this was good.

"We have connections within the CIA and we will not think twice about handing that folder to them if you don't co-operate with us." Jax closed the folder and looked up at Romeo.

"Connections...Shit..." Jax ran a hand over his face as the other clenched around the now closed folder. He wasn't exactly sure what Romeo meant by connections but from his experience there was only one way that criminals had connections with CIA or any type of law enforcement and that was when you were a rat. "Your involved with the CIA..." Both men said nothing and Jax had his answer. He shook his head he couldn't believe that this was happening especially today he'd already been through enough, learnt enough. Maybe he was leaving at the right time. "You can't threaten me with this. I'm out, I'm leaving at the end of the day whoever takes over the gavel might not want this they could vote it out. That wont be my fault or hers you can't do this."

"That's not gonna happen. We can't risk this deal not happening. So you will be taking the reins. And if you think about leaving again we won't hesitate to follow through on giving that folder to our friends."

"And this goes no further than us." Luis added. "Anyone finds out about this and we will crush your MC." Jax turned his back on them momentarily and suddenly something clicked and he spun around to face the two again.

"Were you the ones Clay hired to take out my Old Lady?" He seethed as his heart pounded in his chest.

"I'm sorry for what happened, Clay told us she was threat." Romeo answered.

"Is she?" Jax eyes shot to Luis.

"NO..." He spat through gritted teeth.

"Then why did Clay want her dead?" Romeo asked.

"It's a family problem."

"You seem to have a lot of them." Luis shot off. Jax had to physically plant his feet to the floor to stop himself from lunging at him and giving him the beating he deserved.

"What you're thinking, what you're feeling bury it son." Romeo warned sensing the anger Jax hand towards them. He pointed to the folder in Jax's hand. "You can keep that copy we have others. We're not trying to be your enemies here." Jax scoffed. "We'll be in touch."

Jax stood in the warehouse as the two men left. He felt like he was going to explode. Everything was falling apart. He looked down at the folder in his hand. _How had she been so stupid._ Was what he thought when he stared at it. The contents in the folder changed everything.


	34. AN

Hey all my lovely readers,

Well some of you may have noticed I have pulled the final chapter. I was re-reading it today and I wasn't exactly happy with it. It felt rushed to me and a bit untidy. Sorry to those who have read it and to those who reviewd I'm really sorry. I'm re-working on it now so hopefully I can upload the final chapter soon. It shouldn't take me to long as there are only a few things I want to change.

Again sorry to mess you all about.

Becca xx


	35. Chapter 35

Okay so here it is the last chapter hope you enjoy (Sorry about pulling it)xx

Everything Changes 

Chapter Thirty Four

Nicole stood outside Clay's room staring through the window at a man she barely knew anymore. He had made many wrong choices over the years, it came with being President of the mother charter, tough choices had to be made sometimes, but the choices he had made lately were not for the good of the club it was to protect himself. He was selfish, he was disloyal but most of all he was a murderer.

Unser had told her everything. Told her how Clay had put a shotgun to Piney's chest and killed him at point blank range. It was exactly the same as what Opie had said but for some reason hearing it from Unser made it more believable, more real. Maybe it was because Unser wasn't threatening to kill someone she loves...loved. Yes it was defiantly past tense Nicole did not love the man in front of her. He was not the Uncle she had once looked up to and respected, loved.

And it wasn't just because of what he had done to Piney, although that was bad enough especially since Clay's underhand dealings had already taken away Opie's wife. But it got worse. Just as she was digesting everything that Unser had just told her he started explaining why Clay had done it. He started talking about some letters to Maureen, letters that told of the suspicions JT had against Clay. Nicole felt the bile rise in her throat and her body felt like it was on fire. She needed some air and that was exactly what she did. Cutting Unser off mid explanation Nicole had run from his trailer and climbed into her truck and drove away and some how ended up here.

She wasn't stupid, and it didn't take her long to put two and two together. Clay had killed John. And that was why she didn't love him, why she couldn't. He had taken John away from her away from his family. John may have not been perfect but he was a damn site better man than Clay was.

"Hey sweetheart." Nicole turned to see Tig standing next to her a cup of coffee in his hand.

"Hey." One of his hands came up and wiped that the tears Nicole didn't even know had fallen.

"He's gonna be okay doll..." Nicole huffed and turned her head away from him. She didn't want him to be okay, everyone would be better off if he was dead.

"Did you go after Laroy?" Nicole asked not taking her eyes off Clay.

"Yeah." He sighed as his arm circled around his shoulders.

"What happened?"

"Nothing for you to worry about sweetheart..." Nicole tore her eyes from Clay and turned in Tig's arms to face him.

"You shouldn't have bothered. You shouldn't have put yourself at risk for him, he's not worth it."

"Nic.." Nicole shrugged his arm from around her and stormed off down the hall ignoring Tig's calls for her to come back.

* * *

Jax stood at the bottom of the corridor that led to Clay's room. Since leaving the Warehouse after listening to the Gallindo's threats he went to go and try and get his head straight. Figure out what the hell he was going to do. This morning everything was decided he was leaving by the end of the day with the woman he loves and his two beautiful children but now...now that couldn't happen. He had to stay he couldn't let her go to prison even though he was pissed at her stupidity. Although he knew deep down that it wasn't really all on her he was at fault to.

Finally putting one foot in front of another he moved down the corridor. This was another promise he was going to have to break to Tara and it made him sick.

"Hey...I've been tryin' to call you man." Tig said as he jumped from his seat next to Clay's bed.

"Why?" Jax asked secretly dreading the answer, he really couldn't handle any more shit.

"Nic came by earlier. I don't know man some things wrong with her. I know she's hurtin' from this Clay and Gemma shit but..." Jax rubbed his eyes.

"A'right I'll sort it. How's he's doing?"

"He's in and out."

"Give me a minute with him." Tig nodded and started to head for the door. "Oh and put a call out to everyone Church 8 o'clock."

"'Kay brother."

Standing in front of Clay, being alone with him, Jax felt his rage for the man rush to surface. He may have butted heads with the man over the years, disagreed with a lot of his bullshit decisions but he still looked up to the man who not only helped raise him but Nicole as well. Not any more though now all he saw was the man that murdered his father, taking him away from his family. He deserved to die, he had ruined so many lives but Jax knew he couldn't do it. His hands were tied. Leaving the club was one thing but walking away and letting it crumble, die Jax couldn't do it, it would be another disrespect to his father and to Piney. Plus he couldn't let Nicole take the fall, she had been through enough because of the club.

"Son." That one word sent chills down his spine especially coming out of Clay's mouth.

Closing the blinds to give him a little bit more privacy Jax walked back to the head of the bed grabbing Clay's cut off the back of the chair Tig had been sitting in. Pulling out his knife from the sheath on his hip he laid the cut on the bed and before Clay could say anything he pressed the blade against his neck.

"I read the letters. I know you killed my father..." Clay tried to defend himself as his worst nightmare became reality but Jax pushed the blade harder against his neck making it almost impossible to speak. "You tried to kill Tara..."

"Please Son..." Clay managed to get out but again he felt the blade dig deeper into his skin.

"Don't call me that. The only reason I am not slicing you open right now is cos I need this cartel deal to happen. And those prick Irish men won't deal with anyone else."

"You've..."

"No. Your done tellin' me anythin'. Now I tell you. Your stepping down as president, you can sit at the table, you can have a vote but that's it. You keep the Irish happy, and you stay out of my god damn way. If you don't I let the club read the letters and let Opie tell everyone you murdered his Old man."

"Who gave you the letters..." Jax dug the knife deeper into his skin.

"It doesn't matter."

"Was it Gemma?" Clay fought to get out.

"You stay away from my family." Jax watched as Clay went to defend himself again, not wanting to hear it Jax finally pushed the blade into his skin drawing blood. He was so tempted to just keep on pushing the knife deeper into his skin finally killing him and putting an end to all of this but he couldn't and it took what strength he had left to stop himself. He pulled the knife away from him and creating a little space between them. Watching Clay wince in pain, Jax felt a small bit of satisfaction but it wasn't enough.

Grabbing the cut off the bed Jax took the knife and cut the president patch off. He threw the cut back at Clay.

"You might as well kill me."

"Your already dead."

* * *

Nicole let herself in through the back door of Clay and Gemma's house. The room was encased in darkness but that didn't stop her from noticing the dark figure sat at the kitchen table. She'd seen his bike outside and knew exactly who it was sitting there, the only thing she didn't get was why he was sitting in the dark.

"Hey." She said as she turned on the light. "You okay?" Jax shook his head. Nicole dropped her bag on the table. "Me neither. I went to see Unser today he told me everything...Clay killed Piney Jay."

"I know." Nicole was surprised by how rough his voice sounded and it hadn't gone unnoticed that he hadn't looked at her since she entered, something was wrong. Taking a seat her hand reached across table as she took a hold of his hand. Her fingers ran over the SONS rings on his fingers. He'd been to the graves, more importantly he had been to see his father. She knew it was a little to late but she knew that Piney would be happy that he finally went there. Piney had wanted her to get Jax to go and see him, get his faith back John and Nicole was glad to see that he had. Although she was happy there was a small part of her that wondered why he had gone there, did he know about these letters? "Jay..."

Jax finally looked up at her, so far he had avoided it but he knew he couldn't forever no matter how much he wanted to. The questions he had to ask her were questions he never thought he would have to ask and although he probably wasn't in the right mood to do it, considering that a little over an hour ago he'd broken the heart and all the promises he had made to the woman he loves. And all for the woman was holding his hand. He couldn't help but feel a little bit of bitterness towards her. But they had to have this conversation no matter what.

Nicole was pleased when he finally looked up at her but it was short lived when she noticed the redness around his eyes. He'd been crying.

"Jay..." She stopped when he pulled his hand from underneath hers and reached inside of his cut pulling out a folder. Her first thought was that these were the letters and when he slid them across the table towards her, Nicole actually thought about pushing the folder back towards him insure if she wanted to read that ugly truth.

"I need you to be completely honest with me here Nic..." Her head snapped back up to his. She was confused what did she need to be honest about, if it was the letters inside how would she know what was the truth.

"I don't understand what's going on?"

"You tell me." Hoping that whatever was inside the folder could shed some light on her cousins strange behavior she opened the folder and started reading.

One sentence was all she needed to realise what this was.

Jax watched her closely as she read through the folder. Her eyes went wide and he could see the glisten of tears forming behind them. By the time she was halfway through the folder started shaking and after reading a little bit more she'd finally had enough and closed the folder.

It was a nightmare it must have been because this couldn't be happening. She thought that she had left those four months behind her but now it was sitting in front of her and from Jax's behavior with her he had read it all. What had she done.

Seeing her shaking and seeing the drop of tears land on the folder Jax actually felt himself feel sorry her.

"Nic I need to know what happened...how all that happened..." Nicole wiped her tears and looked up at her cousin. She tried to read what he was thinking but it was hard because the way he was looking at her in a way he never had before. That scared her.

"Was this Gallindo, did they give you this...?"

"Yes."

"Why?" This was why she begged Jax not to get into bed with the cartel, this was what she feared. They would use everything they had on her against the club, that's why she wanted to leave with Liam. God she regretted that now, she should have ignored her heart and done what she knew was right. She should have left.

"Doesn't matter...I just need you to tell me the truth..."

"Have you read it?" Jax nodded. "Then you already know everything..." He felt his stomach drop he knew it was all true but hearing her admit to it was like a punch to his stomach. He felt like all the wind had been knocked out of him. He knew she had a knack for getting herself into trouble but this really took the piss. The prison sentence that Gallindo was threatening her with wasn't just a slap on the wrist she could get life for this shit.

"How the hell did this happen?" Nicole shrugged she really didn't want to tell him all of this, it would kill him as well as her. "How did you end up there?" Nicole never said anything and her silence was annoying the hell out of him. "I need you to tell me, you owe me that much." The last bit came out harsher than he planned but it seemed to do the trick because she started talking.

"After you were arrested I bolted. I couldn't stay at the clubhouse, you had ratted on the club and I knew what that meant. They were going to kill you and being in the clubhouse was too much I couldn't handle it. The thought of losing you...It broke my heart. I got wasted and the more I drank the more I couldn't bare the thought of..." She shook her head words dying in her mouth. She ran her fingers through her hair taking a deep breath trying to build up the courage to continue. "I went to see Darby." Jax took a sharp intake of breath but she ignored it. "I begged him to kill me..." She winced when he banged his fist on the table. She couldn't blame him for being mad. "I'm sorry it was stupid..."

"Yeah it was." He couldn't explain but knowing she had gone to Darby pissed him off. After everything Darby had done after everything Jax had done to protect her from him she just threw all back in his face. It was insulting. She may have been hurting but it was hard to understand why she chose Darby and death or her family who would support her not kill her. He ran his hand over his beard before he spoke again. "What happened next how did you go from Darby to getting into bed with the Cartel?" He tried to ignore the pun.

"Darby wanted to make me suffer, death was too easy. He started giving me drugs long story short he got me hooked." Jax knew Drugs was her Achilles heel and apparently so did Darby. No wonder it all went down hill.

"Then what?"

"He had me right where he wanted me. I would do anything..."

"For him...Darby..." She could hear the bitterness in his tone.

"For the drugs. I needed them. It wasn't about Darby."

"He get you into dealin'?"

"Yes."

"How the hell did you get mixed in with cartel?" Jax still couldn't understand any of this.

"Darby introduced me to them."

"Okay then what?" Nicole buried her head in her hand she couldn't do this anymore. Reliving it was horrible but having to confess it all Jax killed her plus if he kept pushing her they were going to get deeper and she didn't want to go there.

"I can't do this." Nicole went get out of her seat but Jax pounded his fist on the table making her freeze.

"Sit."

"Jay please don't make me I can't..."

"SIT..." He yelled making her sit down immediately. Although he had read it all he had to hear it from her. He needed to know that what Gallindo was threatening her and himself with was the truth. "How did you get into prostitution?" Tears were streaming down her face now. She couldn't believe this was happening. She had really fucked up this time. How was she supposed to discuss this with him, how was she supposed to justify sleeping with men for money.

"Jay please don't make me I can't..."

"Tell me..." He snapped.

"It just kind of happened."

"How does sleeping with someone for money accidentally happen?" He shouted at her, his anger towards her clear in his tone.

"I don't know it just did. I was high..."

"I ain't buyin' that shit."

"I CAN'T REMEMBER..." Nicole shouted, burying her head in her hands again. Jax reached across the table and opened the folder spreading the pages and pictures across the table. Nicole looked from behind her hands. One picture was of her entering a seedy Motel with some guy in a suit. Obviously a customer.

"Ring any bells?" He pointed to another picture. This time she was dressed in a silky black robe leaning in the doorway another customer with her.

"Jay please..."

"Okay what about this." This time he picked up the picture of a guy spread out on a bed, a needle sticking out of his arm, foam at the sides of his mouth and he had a leather belt tied around his neck.

Nicole snatched the picture from him. She recognized the guy, he was the reason for her finally getting herself out of the hell she had created for herself. But the image she was seeing now wasn't what she remembered. He had OD that was it, she had panicked and ran but she didn't kill him and he defiantly did not have a leather belt tied around his neck when she left, she may have been high but she defiantly knew that that was not how she had left him when she bailed on him, leaving him dead and alone.

"I didn't do that...I didn't kill him he just...he OD..." She looked up from the picture at her cousin. He looked so pissed and she knew the deeper they got into this conversation the more his hate was building towards her. It killed her. "I didn't kill him...you have to believe me...shit...This is what they're blackmailing you with..." It was suddenly all becoming clear to her now it had been a set-up the cartel had set her up, that was probably their plan all along. They had used her and she had let them all for a couple grams of coke. "What do they want?"

"Clay has to step down..." Nicole knew that Jax was never going to let Clay lead this club after finding out that he had killed Piney but at the same time she knew he was leaving no matter what. "Romeo wants me to take the gavel..."

"But you're leaving." Jax shook his head and Nicole could see now what it was Romeo wanted he wanted Jax at the head so that he could use him as his little puppet. "He's holding this over head he's using me to make you stay." His silence confirmed it. "Your staying because of me."

"Yes." And that was the god honest truth. And that bitterness he felt towards her increased hearing her say it out loud. He loved her there was no doubt about that and he would protect her till he was dead and buried, Christ he was proving that now, he was choosing her over his future wife, the future of his children but that didn't mean he had to like it and he didn't. She had really fucked up this time and although he was going to protect her he didn't know if he could forgive her for this right now. "Ive gotta go. We're at the table." He stood to his feet and Nicole's head tilted back to look up at him. She wanted him to reassure her tell it was all going to be okay, but he couldn't do that.

"Jay wait..." Jax turned around. Nicole was standing on her feet her arms folded around her. He knew what she wanted he could see it written all over her face. She wanted to know if he was going to keep her secret. He shook his head, this was just typical.

"Tara's knows, but apart from that this shit doesn't leave this room and you don't tell anyone about the Cartel." Nicole nodded. She was good with that she didn't want anyone to know, she'd rather Tara didn't know but she understood why Jax had told her to some degree because he had to explain why they weren't leaving somehow.

"Does she know it all?"

"Does it really matter?" Jax snapped back at her. Nicole shook her head the sting of tears burning in the back of her eyes again.

"I'm so sorry Jay." Jax could see that she was about to break and normally he would be there in a second to comfort her but he couldn't do it, he couldn't be that rock that she needed he was just to mad. "Jay..." She started to edge towards him but Jax backed up.

"No..no.." The tears fell down her cheeks but Jax just turned his back on her and left.

Nicole stared at the door Jax had left through. He hated her she could see it his eyes see it the way he was acting with her. She had screwed up before but never like this, she had gone to far this time and although he may be protecting she knew she had lost apart of him today and it broke her heart.

* * *

Tara pulled into T/M. After her talk with Jax where he told her that he had to stay she had sat on the floor sobbing. He had told her everything the Cartel had threatened him with and she wanted to scream. Nicole had succeeded, she had made him stay, she had ruined her plans of getting her family out of Charming. She knew this would happen. Jax had told her to go, that she could still leave with the boys and when she sat there crying in his arm she really considered it but when he had gone and she calmed down she finally started to think clearly.

She wanted her family, she wanted Jax. He was hers not Nicole's and not Gemma's. If she left they would win and she would lose. She would be free of this town but she wouldn't have Jax and that thought killed her she had already been without him for 10 years she didn't want to be apart from him any more. She couldn't, she didn't think she'd survive.

That was why she had called Neeta to watch the kids, she knew Jax was sitting at the table at 8 to take his new role as President. She had to be there. She was his Old Lady and he was her Old Man, her future husband she wasn't going to leave him stand alone. She was with him all the way. And the sooner Nicole and Gemma got that the better, Jax didn't need them all he needed was Tara and he had her.

The Chapel doors were closed. She knew the rules women were not aloud inside especially when the doors were closed but things were different now, Clay was no longer King and Gemma whether she believed it or not was no longer Queen. This was her and Jax's club now. With a deep breath Tara pushed open the doors. Chibs had switched seats with Tig meaning that Chibs was now the new SAA. The VP seat was empty she assumed it was being saved for Opie.

"Hey." Jax's soft voice drew her attention back to him. She went to him straight away. Her hand clutching his as she dropped to her knees, his forehead pressing against hers.

"I'm not going anywhere. I'm here baby...I'm here."

Gemma was in the kitchen when she saw Tara enter the clubhouse and head straight towards the Chapel doors. She continued watching and was surprised when she went inside. Curiosity getting the better of her Gemma made her own way towards the she got there Jax was sat at the head of the table and Tara was standing behind him her hand resting on his shoulder. The image brought back memories of herself and John, and the look Tara had in her eyes, the fight, the determination, reminded Gemma all too much of herself, and that wasn't a good thing.

* * *

Nicole pulled the jacket tightly around her. She had been sat outside for god knows how long before she heard a rumble of his bike. It was a risk coming here because he might have easily crashed at the clubhouse, but then she hadn't really thought about that when she climbed into her truck and started to drive. But it seemed that she had come to the right place.

She watched the bike slow down when he noticed her and she actually felt herself become a little nervous. Was he going to be okay with this?

Happy parked his bike and shut off the engine, placing his helmet and night goggles on the handlebars. Swinging her leg over his bike he cautiously started walking over to her. Even in the darkness he could tell that she had been crying and that made his pace quicken. This was defiantly no booty call.

As he got closer her tears started falling again as her chest started heaving seeing him just brought back all the pain of the night and she couldn't stop herself. She crumbled.

"Hey." Happy rasped as squatted down in front of her. His hand coming up to rest on the side of her face as his thumb wiped away some of her tears.

"Hi..." Nicole managed to get out in between her sobs.

"What's happened?"

"I really messed up this time he hates me..."

"Who?"

"Jay." Happy moved his hand from her face and ran his hand over his face. He knew something like this was brewing, he felt it today at Tara's house. And even though he had wanted to keep Nicole out of the line of fire by the looks of it she had ended up burned.

"Come on." Happy took her by the arm a pulled her up from the steps he was taken aback when she wrapped her arms around him. His froze for a moment before he wrapped his arm around her. "Come on Kid." He said again leading her up the steps to his cabin.

When he wrapped his arm around her pulling her close Nicole was glad she came because just like every other time before she felt safe with him. And she needed to feel that because she knew that today, everything had changed.

* * *

**(I'm so sorry to those who read the original one I posted but the more the day went on the more I wasn't happy with it. I promise that this is it now I am not going to pull this chapter.)**

**I have been completely overwhelmed by the response I have received for this story, especially when I had almost given up on it. Feels good to actually have it finished.**

**Of course this story would be nothing without all you lovely readers. Seeing the view count and the amount of adds for this story really encouraged me to keep writing and was lovely to see that people were reading it. And of course to all you readers who took the time to review. I love reading them and hearing what you think good and bad I love it.**

**As to those who have asked yes I do plan on writing a sequel to go along with Season 5. However I can't really can't say how long it will be before I start publishing, because as always I like to have the story pretty much mapped out so I don't get writers block and leave you all hanging. (I learnt my lesson the hard way with this story)**

**I do have other stories in the mix as well. I'm working on the last part in the Happy/Liv trilogy. Again I can't give a date for upload but it will be titled ****_Heavy In Your Arms. _****So if you want to read that story keep your eyes peeled.**

**Big thanks again to everyone who had supported this story I love you all and thank you xxxx**


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